Beyond the Fight 04.04.08: Punch Line

Posted by Sergio G. Hernandez on 04.04.2008

The biggest joke in MMA since Phil Baroni’s bodybuilding video hits the scene in a week: thy name is YAMMA.

Welcome to the latest edition of Beyond the Fight. I am your humble writer, Sergio G. Hernandez. Last week, we talked about Frank Shamrock and whether all the attention he was getting was warranted or if he's an old man in a young man's game.

Le's striking prowess combined with Shamrock's stubbornness or inability to go for the takedown proved Shamrock is all but done.

I predicted a third round TKO and a third round TKO it was. So long, Frank, hope that arm heals up nice.

As for Le, beating a fighter who I believed was over the hill to begin with doesn't raise his stock all that much in my opinion. His ground game is still dangerously untested and anyone who can get inside and get the takedown will likely have his way with him.

But moving on…

A new player in the MMA scene will emerge in seven days. Live on pay-per-view from the Las Vegas of the east, Atlantic City, a fledgling company presents it's debut event.

And what a train wreck it will be.

Robert Meyrowitz started this organization, whose name alone does nothing but add fuel to the "MMA is human cockfighting" fire so many have decided to warm their hands on. He once headed up a group called Semaphore Entertainment Group. You might remember that company from terrible movie trailers starring actors and actresses one bounced rent check away from doing porn.

Oh yeah, that group was also responsible for putting The Ultimate Fighting Championship on pay-per-view when no other company would come near it with a ten-foot pole.

While SEG was partly responsible for the UFC's initial success, their brand of "no rules, kill or be killed, no one gets out alive" marketing nearly destroyed the sports in it's infancy.

Presidential hopeful John McCain led a campaign against the UFC that got it kicked off of pay-per-view. UFC was forced to hold events in smaller and smaller venues, all the while adding rules and regulations to appease the politicians.

But SEG was too slow. They either didn't know how to fix the problem or didn't care. It was over 5 years before a state athletic commission would sanction a UFC event and by that point, the nail was nearly in the coffin for what is now the world's largest MMA organization.

It seemed like the entire time the UFC was suffering from political scrutiny, Meyrowitz didn't know what to do. Rules were slowly added but when a company is hemorrhaging money like the UFC was, it would seem obvious that a major overhaul would be in order.

Jump forward to 2008 and Meyrowitz is at it again.

And it appears as if he hasn't learned from his mistakes.

YAMMA Pit Fighting is Meyrowitz's latest brainchild. It promises to be the "evolution of mixed martial arts."

It's a crock, is what it is.

The tagline, "On the streets, it's against the law... In the pit, it is the law," only invokes the same knee jerk reaction that the early UFCs did: this is nothing but a bloodsport for manic, sociopathic fans.

The new fighting surface, which is supposed to "revolutionize traditional MMA", is a joke as well. From initial reports, the surface resembles a shallow bowl, with the outer edges lipping up. Combined with an actual "cage," this ridiculous structure makes the Octagon look like a playground.

Now, I could get past the owners with a long history of poor judgment and even poorer management. I can even get past the ridiculous posturing that this ungodly monstrosity is somehow revolutionary.

What about the fighters?

At this point, I want to snap my DVD copy of Final Conflict 2005 in half and perform hari-kiri with the razor sharp points to appease the MMA gods. Obviously, something has angered them.

Ricco Rodriguez. Gary Goodridge. Oleg Taktarov. Mark Kerr.

Four fighters who legacy I respect but really have no business being in the fight game anymore. Much less fighting on a card that runs almost 40 bucks.

I would have ordered an event with Ricco "Suave" on it back in 2001, 2002. As for the other three, I never have and never will order a pay-per-view with them on the card. Mainly because when they were worth watching, I was around 14 and didn't really call the shots when it came to the cable bill in my household.

And now? I'd rather not sit through fighters I grew up watching and loved plod around a cage, pawing at each other in between pathetic takedown attempts.

Oh, and Butterbean is also fighting. Because nothing screams legitimate like Butterbean.

That seems like the third strike, right? Idiot owner? Streee-rike. Ridiculous enclosure from Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome? Streee-rike TWO! Over-the-hill fighters? YOU'RE OUTTA HERE!

Oh, I wish. Imagine a batter continuously swinging, trying desperately to hit the ball, long after he's been struck out, the teams have gotten on their respective buses, and the fans have gone home.

That is YAMMA.

Here is the rundown:

Don Frye, the only real saving grace of the show, pulled out of his fight against Taktarov.

Early UFC participant Pat Smith was slated replace Frye but was arrested after a police chase in Oklahoma. So he's out. Maurice Smith, former UFC Heavyweight champion, replaced him.

Then Mo gets sick so Mark Kerr comes in to replace him. But wait! The New Jersey State Athletic Board doesn't approve Mark Kerr due to his suspension in Connecticut. Luckily, Pat Smith's charges are reduced and he's back in!

Then Goodridge is knocked out in an MMA bout in South Korea and the NJSAB won't approve him either! His bout with Butterbean is off! Who do they get to replace him? Pat Smith! But isn't he fighting Taktarov?

I honestly don't know who is fighting whom at this point and I wouldn't be surprised if Meyrowitz and the fighters themselves were in the dark as well. The card has gone through so many changes already, I can only imagine how many more are in store for us in the next week.

This entire idea seemed like an early April Fool's Day joke when announced and has degenerated into the biggest cluster$%*& in recent MMA memory.

If you care about MMA at all, I implore you to please… PLEASE not order this show. This event shouldn't have been made in the first place but if they lose enough money, we can prevent a second.

There's a ShoXC event tomorrow and UFC 83 is in two weeks. Watch some real MMA this weekend and on the 19th. YAMMA is a joke.