411's UFC: Wired Report for 5.03.08
Posted by JB Lederman on 05.04.2008
Garcia vs. Huerta. Burkman vs. Parisyan. Me vs. my Hooters waitress. All this and more inside!
UFC Wired, aired 5/3/08
Recap by JB Lederman
JBLederman@optonline.net
Side notes: I just found out that Hooters, which is literally five minutes away from my house, carries the UFC PPVs for free! Yesterday, however, my waitress at said establishment was PREGNANT and not even wearing the Hooters outfit. She had on a t-shirt and spandex shorts. Totally weak. I want my money back!
In other words, she was not dressed like these chicks:
On to the main event of the column.
Welcome to this edition of UFC: Wired Recap, wherein I review, repeat, and reiterate a recap show.
Joe Rogan welcomes us to the show. On tap tonight are two exciting fights: Roger "El Matador" (and Sports Illustrated cover boy) Huerta vs. Leonard Garcia.and Josh "The People's Warrior" Burkman vs. Karo "The Heat" Parisyan.
BTW, this is the UFC Wired theme:
First fight (155 lbs): Josh Burkman (8-3 MMA record) vs. Karo Parisyan (16-4).
Karo demonstrates his favorite technique. Will he try it in this fight?
Round One: Huge flurry to start off. Karo is a step quicker and is in and out fast. Burkman throwing just a hair too late and just looking to counter and land a big shot. Burkman with a leg kick. Strong right by Karo. Both fighters are letting their hands go. Legkick by Karo. Huge right by Karo followed by another right Leg kick by Karo. Burkman works the double leg for the takedown. Karo scrambles, they clinch, and Karo throws Burkman on his head! Burkman works back to his feet. Both slow down toward the end of the round.
Round Two: Nice right by Karo. Body shot by Karo. BIG leg kick by Burkman, sounds like a whip crack. Knee from Burkman. Karo throwing strong right hands, connects with two. Burkman looks hurt! Knee and a combo by Karo. Huge right by Karo to end the round! Both men seem to be gassing.
Round Three: Big right by Burkman. He has a desperate look in his eyes. Clinch by Burkman and he elevates Karo for the big slam! Karo scrambles and gets a sweep while going for the kimura. Scramble back to the feet. Karo with the judo body lock. Both fighters end the round with a flurry.
Winner: Karo, DEC, Round 3.
Pretty good fight that didn't really hurt Burkman's credibility.
Second fight (155 lbs): Roger Huerta (18-1 MMA record) vs. Leonard Garcia (13-1).
Interview with Huerta after this very fight:
Notes: In the pre-fight spiel, Garcia makes some idiotic remarks about being the bull and Huerta will be getting the horns. Um, as a Latino guy, shouldn't he know that matador just means killer? Huerta looks big compared to Garcia. Rogan notes that Garcia could fight at 145 in the WEC.
Round One: Huerta presses to start. They circle and exchange some shots. They clinch and fall. Huerta gets a knee and quickly back to their feet. Huerta charges in and looks for a takedown, Garcia tries a guillotine. Huerta escapes, on top and rights to Garcia as he has him against the fence. Elbows by Huerta, he gets Garcia's back and they roll. Huerta has a choke, but Garcia rolls out. To the feet, rights and knees by Garcia. Garcia cinches in a standing guillotine! Huerta won't tap and slams Garcia! Huerta sneaks his head out, lands shots from the top and Garcia answers from the bottom. Very good lefts connect from Huerta. Huerta looks for side control, lands shots and starts to open up on Garcia. They go to the feet and then Garcia takes him down. Garcia tries a kimura. Huerta escapes that and they both stand and throw wildly and Huerta takes him down. Huerta on top, works for side control and lands more shots on Garcia. Garcia lands some shots from the bottom. Garcia rolls and has top position now. Works from the guard, they trade shots here in the final seconds and the round ends.
Round Two: They both come out looking for kicks and collide. Wheel kick misses by Huerta, clinch and against the cage they go. Huerta takes him down and lands elbows on Garcia. Huerta is landing some big shots, Garcia is working, rolls and out. To his feet and gets a good knee. Nice left by Garcia and lands another. They stand and trade wildly again. Huerta lands a good knee off of a combo, lights up Garcia and he is leaving himself open. They go toe to toe and just throw and Huerta takes control and Garcia is rocked. Huerta takes down Garcia, who then SMILES. Huerta drops elbows and then hammer fists from the side. Garcia eats another elbow and then a left hook. Huerta starts to rain down and connecting at will. Garcia some how gets to his feet and rocks Huerta with a right and a leg kick! Huerta stumbles! They go toe to toe again and just throw! Huerta slams him to the fence and takes him down again very easily. Huerta in mount, Garcia keeps throwing and tries an arm bar, but fails. Huerta lands a few more shots as the round ends.
Round Three: Crowd is pumped up for this round. Garcia shoots in and then eats some shots from Huerta. They throw wildly again and Huerta catches a kick and takes Garcia down. Huerta in mount, now into side control and Huerta lands some elbows. He looks for a kimura. Garcia escapes and Huerta lands some more shots. Huerta controls mount easily, into side control and Huerta lands another good left. Garcia escapes and gets the back of Huerta. Big right to the back of the head by Garcia. He tries to hook a choke and works and throws rights. Huerta fights out and rolls into side control. Lots of shots landed by Huerta now and he stays on top as Garcia rolls away. More shots just rain down by Huerta. Garcia is being punished now as Huerta dominates. More shots connect by Huerta, into the mount and they both throw shots as the round ends.
Huerta hugs Garcia and whispers sweet nothings in his ear after the fight.
Winner: Roget Huerta, decision, 30-27 across the board.
That is all for this week. Thanks for reading and see you soon.
