The 10th Hour 10.23.09: Top 10 Mario Characters

Posted by Derek Robbins on 10.23.2009

It's no secret that the Mario franchise has had some great characters, and in this 10th Hour, we celebrate the best of the best. From Luigi and Wario to Bowser and of course, Mario himself, 411's Derek Robbins ranks his 10 favorite Mario characters this week in the 10th Hour!

Hello and welcome to the 10th hour, this is your host Derek! Well, let's see what's going on this week.

-I haven't got much of a chance to play through the new Smackdown game. I've beaten a couple of the Road to Wrestlemanias, but I haven't gotten to tinker around with the mode I really wanted to – story editor! My brother has a very interesting one that I hope he uploads to the internet. His PSN is Kikind. Without giving too much away, the story is entitled "Raw is Goldust". It's pretty funny stuff from what I have seen so far.

-I am at the very end of Uncharted 2. I wish I had more time to play it as I feel I should have beaten it already, but…I have to say, it may very well be the GOTY. I never, EVER would have thought that I would be considering something other than Street Fighter IV the game of the year, but here we are. Uncharted 2 is just fucking brilliant.

-I'm looking for a new DS RPG to play, does anyone have any recommendations?



Top-10 characters introduced in the Mario Universe

Yes, I know, second week in a row without reader feedback. Sorry, next week I promise to have the section back. I've just been fairly busy with work and I am cranking this out at, yet again, the last minute. So…I PROMISE, and if I'm fibbing you are allowed to like, hunt me down and do what you will with me. As long as it's not humble me Iron Shiek style.

I do read everything you write though, so if you want to comment you may do so below or you can shoot me an e-mail at [e-mail]. Either one works, ya know?

This weeks list is about the top-10 characters that have appeared in Mario games. The rule for this list is simple – in order to make this list, you have to have debuted in a Mario title. I don't care if you debuted with Mario and made your name elsewhere, if you debuted with Mario, you are eligible. As a result, characters such as Diddy Kong and most anyone in the Smash Brothers franchise are not eligible because, really, most of them didn't debut with the plumber.

Well, with that out of the way, letsa' go!

10-) Waluigi - Waluigi seems to generate a lot of hatred for some reason and I never quite got it. Waluigi is just as conniving and wicked as Wario, yet does not carry the same obvious handicap Wario has: the weight. Waluigi can be a pain in your ass and also be agile! What more can you want? Wario's brother also serves as sort of the mascot for Mario's various sporting side-missions. You see, the moustachioed wonder has never appeared in a non-sports game for Nintendo.

He really just makes this list for his appearance in Mario baseball, a game I still attest is one of the finest baseball games ever produced. You see, he was one wicked pitcher who shared a lot in common with Randy Johnson. He was a conniving lefty who could make you guess with each pitch. He was hands down the best-pitcher in the game because of his crafty-ness. Yes, I know Bowser technically had the same pitching stats, but the dude's fastball has about as much movement as Johnathon Broxton's did during the NLCS. You will get clobbered with Bowser, you will win with Waluigi.

Plus, Waluigi has the Rollie Fingers moustache. Nothing beats that. Nothing.



9-) Toad - Toad makes it onto this list for being the original troll. Mario works so hard to rescue the princess, to get that…err…kiss. He makes it to the end of a death-trap of a castle, one that is filled with pits, fire, and fire pits, and what does he get? He gets an underling of Princess Peach who has been kidnapped and greets you with: "SORRY, OUR PRINCESS IS IN ANOTHER CASTLE!" Oh hey, so you mean Mario's attempt to get, err, kissed has proven frivolous? Well fuck that, I'm not saving one of your mushroomy asses again.

Then Mario does it. Again. And Again. And Again. Every other level until level 8 when you finally get Peach. Admit it, the first time you beat Super Mario Brothers you thought that Toad was going to be waiting for you at the end of world 8. That is how thoroughly Toad had you trolled, you just expected to see him, sigh, and continue on with your journey. No, when you actually see Peach, you have had enough, and Mario probably doesn't even want "kissed". He'll just book it out of Bowser's castle in hopes of never seeing little Toad again.

Too bad Toad is in almost every Mario game since that point. Always there to troll Mario. Oh well. Trolls wouldn't exist if there weren't someone to troll.



8-) Princess Peach - Princess Peach is the lone female on this list. Hey, it's not my fault that the Mario universe doesn't really supply a multitude of female characters. What, did you think that Goombette was going to represent the females? Puuuuhlease. So here is Princess Peach, who for much of the series, is getting kidnapped by Bowser. This point is so ludicrous that in pretty much every Mario RPG game, they poke fun at it in some way. That's why I love the Mario RPGs, it takes a lot for a company to openly mock themselves, and they do just that.

Peach is getting placed here for being, pretty much, the best party member in Super Mario RPG. Her healing spells were by far the most useful thing in the game, and honestly, having her in your party at all times made the game TOO easy at points. You could probably have gotten by with Mallow as your primary healer, but Peach was without a doubt the very best (that no one ever was).

She also tends to be my main in any Mario Kart game. I don't know why that is, but I find her racing style and weight class to support my style of play (completely suck) pretty well. I've always had a soft spot for the Princess, but I will be the first to admit she is not the best of the Mario universe. So, that's why she's slotted at number 8. BUT HEY! She can FLOAT! I mean, fuck, that's worth something right?



7-) Donkey Kong - DK has seen quite a shift over the years. He has went from being the arch-nemesis of Jump Man (No, I don't care if it was technically Cranky Kong. Sorry, his name was DK at the time) to being a friendly monkey that Mario will occasionally pal around with and play various sporting events with. He was also the protagonist in some kick ass platformers during the SNES days. You may have heard of them – Donkey Kong Country? Yeah, if you had that game when you were young, you were guaranteed to have kids at your house just about every day.

You'd probably want to make sure Rob Feinstein didn't get his hands on a copy.

DK makes it onto this list for the simple strength of his outside games. As mentioned, the Donkey Kong Country games pretty much defined platforming back in the SNES days and honestly…at the time they came out, I honestly thought that DK was a more viable rival to Sonic than Mario was. That's how impressive he was at the time. Add onto that a pretty fun N64 title and a neato bongo game and you have a character who has established a pretty solid resume.

For whatever reason, DK was my punching bag in Mario Party 2. When my friend Scott and I would ever get an opportunity to punish someone, it would always be DK. We even, in our immature state, referred to him as "Dick Kisser". I still do to this day, even if it does make me sound like I'm 12. So, maybe it's a bit of my inner-child that is placing DK so low. Maybe I am trying to hurt him yet again. Whatever the case, DK is quite an awesome character from the Mario universe.



6-) Yoshi - Yoshi's reign as a symbol of cuteness should have lasted so much longer than it did. I remember a time when people would talk on a regular basis about how he was Nintendo's newest mascot because he was so damn adorable. Pokemon hit afterwards, and Yoshi was no longer the toast of the town – Pikachu was and still pretty much is the quintessential mascot of Nintendo cuteness.

Yoshi is still pretty awesome though. The little dinosaur debuted in Super Mario World for the SNES and was pretty much the run-away star of the whole ordeal. I remember the very first few times I play this game, I always made sure to have a Yoshi with me at all times. I hated playing in the castle areas because it meant I couldn't have my little dinosaur with me. Really, Yoshi was the greatest back then. He could EAT enemies. I mean, fuck, you know Mario ate more mushrooms than Jeff Hardy, but he never sat down and ate a goomba. Well, Mario Yoshi does that. And it is awesome.

Yoshi's Island and Yoshi's Story are also pretty good platforming games and pretty much established the dinosaur as a viable solo star. He may regularly be on the lowest tier in smash brothers, but in my heart yoshi will always be top tier. I mean, he can turn into an egg and roll around! ROLL AROUND! I'm sorry, but if you could revert to a fetal stage and roll around perhaps you will make it on this list.



5-) Geno - The best character to ever come out of the Super Mario RPG series hands-down, there is a reason why people clamored to have him included in Smash Brothers Brawl – he is just plain awesome. Geno is a being from space who grants wishes but when the seven stars are stolen by Smithy, that ability is taken away. To make up for this, Geno puts his being in a puppet. This puppet is pure fucking awesome.

Not only is Geno's backstory relatively interesting, but his abilties in the game are un-paralleled. There is a way to do it, where you input the Geno Whirl, that it will cause 9,999 damage. I discovered this by accident when fighting the giant sword that falls into Bowser's keep. My party was Mario, Geno and Peach. I had Geno shoot his whirl out and BOOM. I won the fight. I could not believe it, but hey, I sure as hell wasn't going to complain.

Geno may have only appeared in one game and it may not seem likely that we will ever see him again, but his one appearance in Super Mario RPG was more than enough to make him one of the top-10 characters in the Mario Universe. Sure, he beat out a bunch of goombas, shy guys and fucking Dry Bones, but he WON…and that's gotta be worth something, right? If you have not played Mario RPG yet (and shame on you if you haven't), do yourself a favor and do so…if only to understand how cool the little puppet man is.



4-) Bowser - Mario's chief rival was a shoo-in for this list. It is very obvious that the turtle just wants some sick princess loving throughout the entire game, but Mario is always there to cockblock him. He will kidnap Peach, he will ask her out, he will even stage marriages…and there is Mario, to prevent Bowser from getting his freak on. For pity alone, he would make this list. Bowser as a whole goes deeper than that.

In every Mario game with a story deeper than SAVE THE PRINCESS, Bowser's personality is very interesting. He is not simply a brute who is out to take over the world, he is a brute with feelings. He is a brute that wants nothing more to be loved by a woman…or even live in his castle in peace. His story in Super Mario RPG, how he would do anything to take back his castle, even team up with Mario, was not only interesting, but funny.

Really, the best Bowser moments come from when Mario teams up with Bowser. He always does so reluctantly, but when he does team up with the plumber, they manage to kick some serious ass together. I think Bowser best shows his relationship with Mario through his ultimate weapon in Super Mario RPG. You see, Bowser will pick up Mario and throw him at an enemy. Yeah, he will team up with the plumber…but only if the plumber knows there will be hell to pay at a later date.

Even if Bowser wasn't horribly interesting in the RPGs, he would still probably be this high for simply being the big boss from the Mario world. Wherever Mario goes, Bowser will follow…and I love him for it. Hats off to Bowser for being iconic in this industry.



3-) Mario - If there was a Mt. Rushmore of gaming, there is no doubt about it – Mario would be on it, front and center. I don't care who you are, where you're from (what you did…)…you've heard of Mario at some point or another. You know that he is a relatively chubby Italian plumber who enjoys the occasional shroom and saving princesses from the clutches of a rather angry dragon/turtle thing.

It's really, really easy to see why everybody knows him though. Throughout Mario's history, it's been just a fun franchise. It's never really tried to do too much…never tried to be overly innovative for the sake of being innovative. Look at the NES Mario titles. Right there, you have three games that define side-scrolling fun. The Super Nintendo Mario didn't try a whole lot different from Mario Brothers 3, it just…was fun. It combined great level design with simple gameplay. It sort of kept up like that. It's a highly accessible franchise that both hardcore gamers and casual gamers can enjoy.

Oh sure, some may think the plumber's tricks have become old hat, but they really haven't! It's that consistency that keeps us coming back for more. We all know that whatever year it is, if there's a core-Mario title released it will be of a high quality…but hell, like Megaman, Mario has done a lot of off-shoot material, ranging from sports, to kart racing, to fighting…and without exception, most of those games are FUN.

Sure, there's a flop every now and then – see the entire post-three Mario Party franchise and Mario is missing – but they really treat their franchise well. If you buy something with the word "Mario" in title, you know you're getting fun and that's the more than you can say about most other characters in this genre. Twenty years from now, Mario will probably still be around and he'll still be appearing in good games because…he really doesn't know anything else.

The very first character that comes to mind when someone says: "Videogames" is Mario. That says a lot about him and also a lot about his standing in popular culture. Him being on this list is a given. As long as he is in Nintendo's ranks, Nintendo will always have a console in the console race.



2-) Wario - Wario is the Scrooge McDuck of the Mario universe. He is unbelievably greedy and willing to sell out anything and anyone, even if it meant gaining just one more dollar. His greed is only paralleled by his weight – Wario is a massive figure. How he can get around without one of those rascal things is a total mystery to me. His weight combined with his greed pretty much means that he is the most hedonistic character in the Mario universe. This, of course, means he is fucking awesome.

Wario also has had a lot of success outside the Mario line. His Wario Land games are all amazing platforming titles and the Wario platformer made by treasure on the Gamecube is an amazing little game. I say little because by the time you finish reading this sentence, you could probably have beat it, but still…it is fun. And that's really all that matters.

Wario's biggest success comes from the Warioware titles on, well, every Nintendo platform currently available at your local store I guess. Whoever thought that playing a bunch of minigames at a rapid fire pace would work so darn well? I have sat down for hours on long trips playing Warioware, and the time would just fly away. Something about having to be on the edge of your seat with every new game just really appeals to me.

Wario also gets bonus points for being a badguy who evades Mario's fist a load of the time. Could it be because…he wants a little more than just "THANKS"? No, no, of course not. Our little jump man is pure.



1-) Luigi - Mario's brother is always in his shadow. Despite being every bit as capable, and in some ways better (Mario is known for his amazing jumping ability, but Luigi's jump is actually more impressive), Luigi is always second banana to his brother. The princess never wants Luigi, she always wants Mario. The girl Luigi supposedly has a thing for, Daisy, was actually Mario's girl at first. Even in women, he is always the second choice.

Now is the time for Luigi to receive the recognition he deserves. He has about three-times the personality of his brother. He is always portrayed as this kind of goofy, awkward character who is creepy in a way…but still loves his brother. He doesn't seem to mind that his brother out-shines him around every corner, he just wants the best for Mario. That's really admirable.

Luigi's shining moments come in the Paper Mario franchise. His scenes in "Thousand Year Door" are all amazing. The adventure he goes on while you go on your adventure is absolutely hilarious. Something about the green man going through a similar journey with similar, strange fans just rang home with me. It was always funny to see what his partners had to say about him. Like…Luigi passed out, or Luigi is a horrible person to be around. Really, does that surprise you? Luigi rubs me as kind of a guy who would like not shower for a week or so and hope nobody would notice.

Luigi's role in Super Paper Mario was also interesting. It was refreshing seeing him as kind of a "badguy"…he seemed to really thrive in that role. If Nintendo wanted to, they could make one hell out of a villain out of Luigi. Ah, but that'll never happen…he'll always be the eternal understudy.

But that's why we love him. He's Luigi and he's a lovable loser.



Well, that's it for this week. See ya next time!

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