Nintendophiles 1.13.10: NBA Jam, The New DS That ISN'T Being Released (Yet), Zelda, More
Posted by John De Large on 01.13.2010
Or.......Ugh, That Boy Who Married A Video Game Character, He Ain't Right.
Hey there, this is J-D-L coming to you on your computer screen with ANOTHER edition of Nintendophiles. I'll be taking over this column (AND The 10th Hour) until I prove myself unworthy of either one! Meli is in the background once again, this time playing Phoenix Wright and making fake Facebook updates while I bring you the news!
So here we go, take it away......myself!
Man Marries His Nintendo DS Character
SOURCE: CBS.com
Click the link to watch the video. Seriously.
For those that cannot view said video, here's the short form. A Japanese dude carries a DS around. What's in the DS? A female game character who sways and motions from time to time. Her name is Nene Anegasaki, a video game character from the Nintendo DS game, "Love Plus."
She's also married to the dude who owns the DS.
Yes, married -- as in, LOOKIT, THERE'S A MARRIAGE BETWEEN MAN AND MACHINE GOING ON IN THIS VIDEO. Their wedding ceremony even attracted over 3,000 viewers.
How they managed that, I dunno. Maybe there's a special rule in Japan that allows this? Moreover, how does a family accept this?! I mean, I'd love to sit in on the conversation this dude had with his Papa after he got engaged to his DS.
Dude: Dad, I wanna spend the rest of my life with this machine.
Dad: (slaps son) WTF?!
How does he introduce this "girl" at parties?
Dude: Hi, my name is Shinichi, allow me to introduce my wife, she's in my pocket!
Some Old Guy: Ahhh, so she's a midget.
I guess the real focus is that the guy is happy and isn't a threat to anyone, he's just weird enough to want to spend the rest of his life with a video game.
NBA Jam is back with new game modes and characters -- on the Wii! Thanks, EA Canada! Those Bill Clinton and Al Gore swap codes BETTER be intact and you'd better put in a hidden Mortal Kombat court this time. As far as new game modes go, I hope there'll be a create-a-player option and maybe a sick create-your-own-dunk option. It'd be great to do a 1080 in midair then frontflip and dunk on everybody. Speaking of dunking on everybody, hopefully EA Canada will include an online versus option. Dunking on EVERYBODY while trash talking into a headset would be so much more satisfying than just regular dunking on friends.
I'm also hoping that the game comes with the option to switch between classic rosters (you know, from 1993 when the original game came out) and modern ones.
Peter Moore, president of EA Sports had this to say: "NBA Jam is one of the most recognizable franchises in videogame history. Diehard fans of the original game have been asking for a remake for more than a decade. We're very excited to give them their wish this year with the return of this iconic franchise."
As it's a remake I hope there'll be updated graphics and a choice to play "classic," NBA Jam, whether it's the Arcade or the Super NES version!
And as long as we're getting updated sports games, let's get some Tecmo Bowl HD Remix!
Nintendo Sticks It To Tamagatchi With The Pokewalker
SOURCE: DS.Kombo.com
Nintendo wants you to do the digital pet thing all over again. As if the Pokemon Pikachu thing wasn't bad (and addicting) enough 10 years ago, now Nintendo will now include a Pokewalker with every copy of Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver.
A Pokewalker will let a player pick any Pokemon (Squirtle FTW) they want and send him or her to the Pokewalker, where the Pokemon can walk in step with the player as he or she walks down the block or does some exercise. Special items can be obtained using the Pokewalker and wild Pokemon can be encountered (certain Pokemon can only be captured through the use of the Pokewalker), so it will be more than just a kitschy toy.
Well, the thing looks damn cooler than that bright yellow Pikachu dealie I had when I was in 7th grade. Color me interested, I might have to get one.
Nintendo's DSi XL/XXX/Part 2/Mark II/Jr./Sr./Champion Edition/Code Red has yet to hit the States and probably won't any time soon, thanks to how successful the DS Lite and DSi are (not just in the States, but globally). However, Nintendo seems to know what features they want the next DS model to have and Satoru Iwata is even willing to talk about it at length:
"[It will have] highly detailed graphics, and it will be necessary to have a sensor with the ability to read the movements of people playing." It will also make beef jerky....I hope. - JDL
Thankfully, Nintendo is not planning to add any cell phone features, so it sounds like the next step would be a portable Wii, which might be a hit with kids and at parties. While that might be a cool thing to have in a portable device, there reaches a point where enough is enough. Hopefully it'll be a long time before Nintendo slaps another function onto the DS and sells it for another $250.
The Reg: "....the Zelda title for Wii will come out when it's perfect."
SOURCE: NintendoEverything.com
Nintendo president Satoru Iwata says that gamers can expect a new Zelda title later this year. However, Reggie Fils-Aime, the American president of Nintendo, had this to say when asked about the game:
"Right now, it's still in development, but the key message that Mr. Miyamoto and Mr. Aonuma is telling us is that it really has to be perfect when it launches. That really is what the Zelda fan is expecting. So for all those Zelda fans out there right now, what I would say is, enjoy Spirit Tracks and know that the Zelda title for Wii will come out when it's perfect."
The perfect Zelda game? But they already made Link To The Past like 20 years ago! I'm not sure what they could add to a new Zelda game to make it "perfect," perhaps this game will be combat heavy with a darker Link, featuring a more realistic portrayal of a man against all odds and maybe even some blood and gore? Hopefully they do away with that imp thing this time, Midna or whatever. Also, no more transformation terrors please? All I want is a Boy And His Sword Story, please!
Maybe they'll try a new approach instead of a new transformation power or obnoxious sidekick. Perhaps we can get a Zelda game with Final Fantasy 6 style combat? Or what about a Fallout 3 type of game that takes place in Hyrule instead of a post apocalyptic world. Actually, that's not a bad idea for a Zelda game: What if Ganon won and Hyrule was destroyed, so everyone had to live in a crapsack world? Maybe there's potential after all and hopefully a "perfect," Zelda game isn't too far off.
Greenpeace Wants Nintendo To Do Their Part
SOURCE: Edge-online.com
Of the 18 companies featured in Greenpeace's Guide to Greener Electronics, which company scored a 1.4 out of 10 regarding environmental policies involving recycables, harmful chemicals and the like?
Greenpeace also made note that Nintendo scored a zero (0) on matters involving all e-waste criteria. I wasn't even aware that there was such a thing as e-waste. Dammit, now I'm thinking of making a wastebasket that looks like an E-Tank from Megaman!
Anyway, Nintendo made these statements in an email:
"We consider the environmental impact of our products over their entire life cycle, from planning to disposal."
"We also consider the importance of reducing environmental impact at end-of-life disposal by clearly indicating the materials used in each product to make recycling easier."
"The Wii console is notably the most energy efficient of its generation, and we have improved the design of some of our latest products, such as the Nintendo DSi, to minimize their energy consumption when in use.
"We also work to eliminate harmful substances from our products right from the initial stages of material selection and have established strict environmental control standards, with our 340 production partners all cooperating with us in our efforts."
In a semi-related note Microsoft received a score of 2.4 out of ten, Sony was seventh with 5.1 out of ten and Nokia placed first with a score of 7.3. I'm not sure what e-waste and being environmental has to do with running a multi-million dollar company or selling a bunch of games to kids, but it must be important if Nintendo responded directly.
Amazon.com has been slashing the prices of certain Sega games on the Nintendo Wii to just $13 as part of a new game sale.
This week on Amazon.com you can pick up The House of the Dead: Overkill and MadWorld (!!!) for just $12.99. That's right, two top name titles that aren't even a year old will cost you less than a steak dinner at Applebee's.
With Nintendo bringing the cost of Wii's down to $199.99 from $249.99, you have to wonder what'll be next on the price chopping block. Recently (if you think a month ago is recently) I discussed how awesome it'd be if games were just $10 cheaper. I guess Nintendo heard what I said and took it up a notch, making their games slightly over $10, rather than just knock $10 off.
Here's a list of some other things I'd like to be around the $10 price range if anyone else is listening:
-A steak at Ruth Chris
-An Xbox LIVE membership
-New Vans slip-ons
-Razing Storm, the game, the one like you see in Dave and Busters
-A walrus
-A life sized poster of BJ Novak
-A Lear Jet (Wooooo!)
-Stock in Google
-A limousine
-College tuition
If you haven't pick up house the dead or madworld yet, you should. 13 bucks is a steal for those games.
Posted By: Guest#1509 (Guest) on January 13, 2010 at 10:31 AM
What would you do with a walrus? I'm a little confused after you mercilessly attacked the man who married the love of his life that now you want a walrus for 10 bucks...
Posted By: The Salms (Registered) on January 13, 2010 at 11:54 AM
Wow, that youtube video wasn't entertaining at all.
Posted By: G-Walla (Guest) on January 13, 2010 at 03:40 PM
The DSi XL better not be delayed. Damnit all I got rid of my DS to get it!
Posted By: AG Awesome (Guest) on January 13, 2010 at 03:45 PM
I think it's sweet that someone can build a healthly relationship with just one gaming system. I'm too much of a game whore to do that.
Posted By: The Dutch (Guest) on January 13, 2010 at 10:56 PM
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