Working Title 08.17.06: Fanboys and You
Posted by Jordan Williams on 08.17.2006
That's right, you either hate them or hate them more. It is time for Working Title to venture into the land of the FANBOY. Being a day late never hurt anyone!
Fanboys. If you have any sort of console or game preference, you've been called one before. Hell, I'll call you one right now!
Fuckin' Fanboy!
Fanboys, for those who don't know, are people who take their love for a certain object a tad bit too seriously. Sure, it's one thing to love Nintendo and its games, but it's another thing to have shrine to Link and offer up your virginity for a chance to play Twilight Princess before anyone else does.
The fanboy is a source of hate among the gaming world, not for the sheer fact that they like something a LOT but for the way they convey their ideas. Ever get into an argument with a fanboy? If you have, you know exactly what I am talking about. They are worse than Anti-Americans. Today, we will look at the various types of fanboys, the warning signs, and how to tell if you or someone you love is indeed a fanboy. This is going to be quite a farcry from Welcome to Next Gen, whereas I was fairly unbiased and more of a news reporter in that series. In this column, I'm letting all the cannons fly. It's time to rant.
I am Fanboy, hear me BITCH.
Before we delve deeper into the mind that is the run-of-the-mill fanboy, I am sure those of you who aren't game-savvy will no doubt need a slight introduction into the world of Fanboyism. Don't mind that I do. We here at Working Title love to explain things, and explain things we shall!
A fanboy is your typical fan, just moreso. Whereas a fan will simply prefer one game, console, or genre to another, a fanboy will swear on his (or her) life that that game, console, or genre is the best thing since sliced bread covered in porn.
"But what's wrong with liking something?"
Glad you asked! Sure, there's nothing wrong with liking a product, but there IS something wrong with thinking that all other products are inferior just beacause YOU like it. Sure, as much as I would LIKE to think the Gamecube was the best console of the last generation, I'd have 500 or so people tell me I was dead wrong. Fanboys thrive on the fact that they think they are right all of the time, no matter what. They'll support whatever they love to the death simply beacause they love it so much. I tell you, it's just damn sad. Sad yet sometimes hilariously funny.
"But, I really DO like [insert product] a lot!"
That's good! Good for you! But you have to recognize that sometimes (most of the time), there might JUST be a better product out there. Sure, liking it is one thing, but saying it's the best ever and nothing in the world will ever compare to it because you said so? Makes you sound like an ass; not a donkey ass, but more like...a Jack Thompson ass.
"Okay, okay. Why don't you give me EXAMPLES of fanboys then!?"
Sure!
Fanboy Archtype #1 - Console Fanboy
Oh boy, I just jumped right into it. With the Next Gen coming up, they are EVERYWHERE. You might be one right now!
Console fanboys are among the most popular of the fanboys. They will blindly support their console even when the games it has aren't up to snuff, when the console releases a truly bad game, or when the console just plain sucks. But it doesn't always have to be a failing console who gets the fanboys; successful ones get them, too. These types of fanboys gain an ego about themselves just on the sole fact that they are viewed as more successful, thus whatever attempt by the other consoles is just moot because they know their console will ALWAYS win. Period.
Console fanboys come in different shapes and sizes. Now I'll break down the fanboys by consoles. This is pretty much guaranteed to get me hate mail...probably from fanboys themselves. (Seriously, if you get offended by this...)
The Xbox/Xbox360 Fanboy -
The Xbox fanboy is one of great mystery. They don't seem to be quite as vocal as the other fanboys, quite possibly due to the fact that most Xbox(both) owners tend not to get in the middle of these battles. However, they DO exist. An Xbox fanboy usually thinks that anything below a T rating is under his or her level. If it doesn't have blood, gore, tits, or cussing, it's just not worth their time. The Xbox fanboy loves to rub his/her superior online gameplay in the face of his/her fanboy brethren, often proclaiming that this console is the best just for the gift of Xbox Live.
Rated M is where it's at. The Xbox fanboy thrives on the fact that s/he is 'adult' enough to play Rated M games, but in a fit of surprising irony, most of them that go on and on about the games in question are usually very immature themselves. Not saying that all Xbox fanboys are 13-year-old males who play DOA just for the boobage; I'm just saying a lot of them act like it.
Xbox fanboys might be the most lesser known of the three (not counting the almost non-existent PC fanboy), but when they are around, they travel in packs with most all of them talking about how Halo revolutionized the first person shooter genre (which was already revolutionized by Goldeneye).
The Sony (PS1, PS2, PS3, PSP) Fanboy -
By far, the largest smattering of fanboys hail from the land of Sony. Often a head-to-head rival with that which is the Nintendo fanboy, Sony fanboys tend to flaunt the fact that, for the past two generations, they have had the highest-selling console. Sony fanboys tend to think other consoles and games for such are simply beneath them, are quick to shoot down any Xbox game due to the fact that it will be ported over to PS2 in a matter of months, and are quick to shoot down any Nintendo game on the premise that it is too 'kiddie.'
The Sony fanboy enjoys his role at the top of the fanboy food chain, always citing that it has the best RPGs and fighting games out of the three. Even though the latter might hold true in some respect, whenever the former is disputed, the Sony fanboy will always return to its bread and butter defense:
"Final Fantasy VII is the best RPG EVER!"
Yes, the majority of Sony fanboys use the well-known FF7 defense when it comes to any and all arguments about their console or choice of games. Simply put, they believe FF7 is the best game ever, and the simple fact that it is on the PS1 (and playable on the PS2 and 3) makes it the best console ever.
And then there's the PSP, Sony's answer to the Nintendo DS. Yes, even the PSP has its fanboys. Sure, the handheld doesn't have many great games, and the fact that its UMD sales are pitiful doesn't harm these fanboys at all. They'll simply tell you the PSP rules because of its ability to homebrew and the emulators you can have. Emulators that ironically play Genesis and SNES games.
However, you should never DARE reveal to the Sony fanboy that their console tends to break if you look at it wrong, has ridiculous load times, and tends to get the short end of the stick with most ports. They'll simply rebute you with:
"Final Fantasy VII was the best game EVER!"
The Nintendo Fanboy-
Oh, here we go. Whereas Sony might have the largest base for fanboys, it is Nintendo, by far, that has the most dangerous. This breed of fanboy is constantly under fire by its other two counterparts to the point where the Nintendo fanboy is often seen as bitter and quick to anger. The average Nintendo fanboy will show undying support for anything Nintendo churns out, be it The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker or Mario Party 300.
The Nintendo fanboy seems the most at odds with Sony, as the two constantly bicker about who has the best games, who stole what, and who sold better. The mantra of the Nintendo fanboy is usually something along the lines of "We don't care about graphics, it's all about GAMEPLAY," yet, when Resident Evil 4 came out, they ironically took the time to lord over how the PS2 graphics weren't superior.
Gamecube version top, PS2 version at the bottom. (thanks to Gamewelike.com for the image)
The Nintendo Fanboy is usually the first one to jump into an argument and the last one to leave. They usually prove their points solely on how much they liked something. Sure! Playstation might've had Final Fantasy VII, but we had all of the other GOOD Final Fantasy games!
Nintendo fanboys gain their reputation of being bratty, childish, and sometimes just plain annoying by the fact that their console of choice tends to have more E- and T-rated games than M, thus giving them the view that they themselves are indeed 'kiddie.' While this doesn't hold true for all Nintendo fans, most of them really don't try to help others think differently. When a Nintendo console gets a game that is rated M, they hail it as the best thing since Super Mario Galaxy Castle Sunshine 64 because they FINALLY have a game to say "SEE! WE AREN'T KIDDIE!"
And then it gets ported to the PS2.
Fanboy Archtype #2 - Genre Fanboy
Oh yes, there's even more. As if I wasn't done blasting a good chunk of my readerbase already, there's the wonderful genre fanboy.
The genre fanboy is inclined, by law, to like one genre of games more than another. Regardless of the unfair comparison of comparing Halo 2 to Super Mario Sunshine, given the fact that they are two COMPLETELY different games, they will always side with the genre THEY love.
Now, there's nothing wrong with preferring a genre over the other; I don't like driving games all too much. Does that mean all driving games suck? Not at all, but don't you try telling this to a genre fanboy.
A genre fanboy who prefers...let's say...RPGs Would absoulutely shit on any game that isn't an RPG because we all know RPGs are the best games ever simply because driving games do not offer the in-depth character development, deep storylines, or androgynous male leads that most RPGs do.
The genre fanboy is usually tied into another fanboy archtype, the Series Fanboy.
Fanboy Archtype #3 - Series Fanboy
Do I really need to explain this one? I do? Damn it.
The series fanboy, as the name would state, obviously thinks one series or franchise of games is better than all else. A great big SHINING example of this is the ever-so-wonderful Final Fantasy Fanboy.
Oh yes, you know of Final Fantasy. Odds are you have played a lot of them. Hell, odds are, at one point in your life, you went by a screename that had "Seph" or "Cloud" in it. Not to pick on the FFF, but they are really the Holy Grail when it comes to the sheer amount of fanboys it has. The average Final Fantasy Fanboy thinks that the FF franchise is the best franchise of RPGs ever. While this might be true (depending on who you ask), they do have one major flaw:
The average FF Fanboy ONLY plays Final Fantasy and compares any other RPG they happen across to the latest Final Fantasy.
If you ask any other RPG fan, they'd tell you in a heartbeat of at least three series which have garnered more critical acclaim and fan support than Final Fantasy, but a serious series fanboy will have none of that because they are always right...and are always wrong.
Oh, alright. I'll use another example so I'm not just picking on one group here: The Mario Fanboy.
It's Mario. You know him, you love him. He is a little chubby plumber who has never fixed a damn pipe in his life. He has well over 140 different games. It seems pretty fair to say he has a lot of fanboys, right? You bet your Koopa-stomping ass it is.
Although it might just be fact that Mario is probably the King of All Characters, this doesn't stop fanboys of his games for hailing every new Mario game like the second coming of Christ. Sure, a lot of his games have been good, but he has had some pretty not-so-good ones, too. But would a true series fanboy ever let you know that? Hell no. They know that Mario Party...what are they on now, 12?...is just as good as Super Mario Bros for the NES.
What!? Some Fanboys are...GOOD!?
So this column just doesn't turn into my bashing fanboys, I figured I should examine the other side of the coin. Not ALL fanboys are annoyingly horrible. There's some fanboys who are actually open-minded to other forms of entertaiment although they tend to be few and far between.
Fanboyism will always be given a bit of a negative stigma due to the fact that most of the time, the bad outweighs the good. But sometimes, you might find the small gem that is a rational fanboy.
Sure, he might love his Xbox 360 over anything else, but this doesn't stop him from conveying his arguments in a well-thought-out fashion and actually backing them up with facts. And more importantly, he doesn't sell himself short by not enjoying games for other consoles simply because they are on other consoles.
I'll be the first one to admit, I'm pretty much a Nintendo fanboy, but that doesn't stop me from spending time playing other games. Hell, I've spent the greater part of this year giving my soul to the Xbox 360.
All-in-all, sure, fanboys might be horrible, annoying, and pretty petty, but they aren't all bad. Some of them actually tend to act intellegent. So don't judge every fanboy based on my rant today; you'll just make it worse.
Am I a Fanboy?
Are you? Hell if I know. What I do know is...the READERS might know! Yes, you. You reading this. Ogre needs your help!
Send in some ways to identify a fanboy. They can be short, sweet, funny, mean, whatever, and I'll post them here next week. If I don't get any, I'll just make some up.
That's it.
Welp, this sure was a far cry from Welcome to Next Gen, huh? You got me ranting about fanboys, being sarcastic, and all sorts of other funny gems. Now that this issue has come to an end, what better way to end it than with...READER MAIL!
Our first letter is from Todd Vote. He explains why he thinks the Nintendo has a better chance of coming out on top this time around.
Do I think Nintendo will be Number one? Definitely possible. I know of a lot of people who are going to be buying the Wii simply for the Virtual Console, which you didn't even mention (OGRE'S EDIT: I did indeed mention the Virtual Console, I informed Todd of this). Do I think it can break through and be a solid number 2? Absolutely, I think Ubisoft's announcement of 7 titles for the Wii will ease other developers minds about supporting the system. I think Sony really shot themselves in the foot with their high price point and the fact that they want the casual gamer more than the hardcore gamer. Nintendo appears to be the only console being designed with gamers in mind. With the way Microsoft and Sony are at each other's throat, all it is going to take is a couple of good games, and the Wii can sneak right in there.
I bought an Xbox 360 when I heard that the PS3 was to be $500-$600. I kind of regret my decision, because it appears as if Microsoft ran into the same problem they did the last time around. Several average launch titles, then nothing of note for the first year. There has yet to be anything released on the 360 that I am excited about. And the games I am excited about (Superman Returns, Gears of War, & the Godfather) are constantly being delayed. I see Xbox and Wii as the number one and two. And if they were smart they would get together to campaign as such to eliminate Sony. Buy a Wii and a 360 for the price of a PS3? Sign me up…
Thanks for listening.
I pretty much agree with this. Right now the PS3 is looking fairly sad when it comes to games, and its price, while justifiable by the hardware, isn't justifiable by the games.
My next letter is from Lyrai (Lie-Rye), pointing out something I may have missed in my Wii column.
Nintendo said during their announcement of Super Smash Brothers Brawl that they don't want to use the Wiimote for it because they felt it'd be too difficult for gamers to control. This leads me to belive they will not force developers to use the Wiimote, allowing more games on the system due to not requring the propietary controller.
Now, while it MIGHT be safe to assume this, I'd still like to see someone cite this for me. I know of SSBB using the Cube Controller, but I didn't know the reason behind it. Anyone care to do a follow up?
Remember, always send in reader mail! It's a nice way to show others that 411Games has some readers. That, and it helps me fill space in the column.
[insert witty comment about pimping here]
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Next Week
Now that I've tackled fanboys, it's time to look at what I'm going to call "Underrated/Overrated." It will be a four-part series where I look at an underrated and an overrated game from four genres of gaming(no order decided yet): Platform, FPS, Fighting, and RPG.
and as a sneak peak of one of the issues, guess which side THIS game is going on?
Until next time, I'm Jordan Williams, and this column REALLY needs a title.
