Angry Gaming 03.26.07: Behold the Power of Cheese - From Akuma to Acura
Posted by Damian Sarcuni on 03.26.2007
We are opening the doors of the cheap and cheesy hall of shame to take down these tactless losers once and for all.
Welcome to Angry Gaming, where we get medieval on the gaming industry's ass. I am your hate master, Damian Sarcuni, and I am currently on a 7 juice fast in a sad attempt to shed some pounds quickly. Shhh, don't tell my mom!
Behold the Power of Cheese - From Akuma to Acura
Once upon a time, in a small Brooklyn Pizzeria on the corner of 20th and Bath Avenue, there was an arcade cabinet. This arcade cabinet had been replaced and upgraded several times over the years, but it was one year in particular that gamers from all over the entire world flocked there to play. Few could explain the phenomenon, but something about the game inside that cabinet was drawing fans in with powerful force. That game was Street Fighter Alpha 2, and among the hundreds of challengers to compete at that pizzeria, only two young boys stood as its champions. One of those boys was me. The other was a kid named Rui.
Rui and I were so skilled at SFA2 that we could beat our opponents while staring at the game's reflection in the pizzeria window. Against each other though, we were dead evenly matched, and more than one quarter draining battle resulted in an even win/loss record or double KO finish. Though we didn't know each other outside of this rivalry, it was all in good fun and the locals would often gather around to watch us go at it.
Then came the fateful day of the invasion; After I convincingly handed some Chinatown kids their arses in a midday series, their friends showed up to seek revenge. My character choice was Ken Masters, but their character choice was Akuma. Those of you who have ever played a recent game in the Street Fighter series can guess where this is going. Though I fought well against my attackers, Akuma's many special attacks and combos proved too strong for me and I was beaten. I tried my hardest to get revenge, but to no avail despite how many quarters I surrendered.
Then Rui showed up. He had the same luck as I did against these newcomers, and after a quick glance at each other, we knew what had to be done. Rui threw in another quarter and chose Ken again, this time managing to win round 1. At the start of round 2, he backed away from the cabinet and I jumped on. The Chinatown team wasn't prepared for the change in play style, and we promptly sent them packing for the rest of the evening.
We wouldn't normally need to pull a trick like that, but since they were using Akuma we didn't have many options. The character of Akuma is simply given too many advantages over all the other characters in Street Fighter and he usually dominates completely. Akuma isn't alone in this either. There are countless games that suffer from imbalance characters, stages, weapons, and tactics in multiplayer modes. The worst part is that geeky, annoying game fan boys love nothing better than to take advantage of these imbalances and use them against you, rather than increase their own skills at the actual game. These are the same people who would rather come up with an algebraic equation to overpower their equipment in Castlevania: Symphony of the Night than to actually look at the vampire and fantasy aspects of the game.
A pox and hex and a voodoo curse on every game developer who doesn't take the time to balance out the challenge in their games and keep the multiplayer fair. There isn't much we can do about them except pray for their imminent demise. As for the gamer fan boys taking advantage, they can and must be stopped, and that is what we are here for today. We are opening the doors of the cheap and cheesy hall of shame to take down these tactless losers once and for all.
I get the feeling we will need to further discuss this topic in the future, so I'm going to make this a reoccurring theme entitled Behold the Power of Cheese. This first edition will look at 2 racing and 2 fighting games, and how to best the cheesiest opponents in each. Contributions are welcome as always.
Street Fighter: Akuma
So just what is it that makes Akuma so cheap? Well, for starters let's look at his background. Akuma originally appeared in Capcom's Super Street Fighter II Turbo as a hidden character that was both fightable and playable. While all the other characters in the game were given special "super" combos or finishers, Akuma was not given any. He had plenty of moves to make up for it though. Akuma played a standard Ken and Ryu clone, using the Shotokan karate style. However, in addition to the ability to throw two different fireballs (regular and triple hit) Akuma was also given the ability throw fireballs toward the ground while in midair. Lastly, Akuma was also given the ability to teleport across the screen without being hit.
As time went on, Akuma began showing up in several of Capcom's 2D fighter releases, usually as a secret character. Yet in each release, Akuma gained more and more abilities, including several ultra powerful super combos. The most famous of these is Akuma's raging demon, a move where Akuma floats towards his opponent, grabs them, and beats them up a white flash blots out the screen for nearly 100% damage. Since Akuma's normal attacks were already faster and more powerful than those of his opponents, one would assume that he would continue to appear only as a secret character. Unfortunately, this was not the case. Akuma appeared in several games as a perfectly normal selectable character, despite his obvious advantage over other characters.
That's not to say that Akuma disappeared from secrecy altogether. In many of the games he appeared in, another version of Akuma known as Shin Gouki or Super Akuma was also playable. This version of Akuma was even faster and more powerful, throwing two fireballs in the air at once and getting a full 100% damage rating for his demon rage move. In multiplayer, gamers flocked to Akuma and used his distinct advantage to get an edge over all human opponents. Why anyone would choose Akuma in single player mode is beyond me though. Each of Akuma's endings only serves to confirm what we already know about him: he's strong, evil, and mysterious.
How to Beat Him: Cheesers who use Akuma are generally looking to show off their knowledge of combos and big damage moves. The most over used Akuma combo is the short dragon punch into a hurricane kick, but the disadvantage to that is opponents have to get in close in order for Akuma to hit it. Use this to your advantage, If you press the action against Akuma, simply walking forward on the ground, players will initiate that combo instinctively and input it fast to ensure success. This means that if you block at the right moment, Akuma will have to go through the entire combo, leaving him in an exposed hurricane kick motion. This is your moment to unleash a solid super combo or anti-air hit, depending on your character of choice and situation. Akuma users under pressure will often resort to air fireballs, but its pretty easy to get around these by jumping forward after the danger has passed or by walking under them. Just make sure you don't go for the obvious jump kick attacks, as Akuma players expect those and wait to counter them. Use their self confidence against them, and you'll be fine.
Soul Calibur II: Necrid
When Soul Calibur II was ported from the arcade to the console versions, some dumb ass over at Namco decided they had a hard on for Todd McFarlane. As such, the infamous comic creator and sculptor, was given the opportunity to design a character for the console versions of the game, a rather beastly looking creature known as Necrid. This character is quite overpowered and uses a special weapon called "Enigma" or "Maleficus", a ball of energy that transforms into various other characters' weapons in the game and says one hell of a commentary about McFarlane's originality.
In addition to Necrid, players also had to deal with McFarlane's other oversold creation, Spawn, on the Xbox release of the game. Necrid's back story sounds like an 8 year old thought it up while trying to give himself the most super powers in a game of pretend with his schoolmates. Necrid was once a warrior who managed to grasp Soul Edge (thus making himself a former champion) who was corrupted by the evil sword and banished into a dimension of chaos. When Necrid managed to escape the chaotic realm, he found himself in constant pain and had to collect fragments of the sword to stop the pain. And he has all the powers of every other character and he's super bad ass so he can fight through the pain and do lots of combos n' stuff. And he can probably fly too.
Players who use Necrid are mostly button mashers. His combos are relatively simple and since his Enigma ball transforms into various weapons it hits at different distances. His recovery time is also very fast and as such, it's very difficult to find an opening where you can actually counter with your own strikes. Lastly, Soul Calibur II makes guard impact (deflecting an opponent's attack) very easy, so a Necrid player who knows how to use guard impact is really a defensive power house.
How to Beat Him: Defeating Necrid is all about changing up your game plans. One thing you can count on a Necrid user to do is to open up their attacks with a straight forward combo, so right of the bat it's a good idea to hit them low. In fact, Necrid is far less capable while crouched, so try to keep your opponent guessing but move in when you get them to duck. While it's usually not a great idea to circle around Necrid, changing up combos between high and low generally works here. Remember that you can guard impact just as easily as Necrid can, and players tend to get overconfident in Necrid's offensive abilities. Start off by impacting or countering their first combo low, and you can set the pace for a fight that should swing your way.
Need for Speed Carbon: Corvettes and Audis
Switching over to the racing genre, Need for Speed Carbon presents us with an entirely new beast to battle, this time on the road. Go ahead and log on to any online multiplayer games on any release of the game and I guarantee you will see plenty of drivers waiting to play, all using the same two cars: the Chevrolet Corvette Z06 and the Audi Lemanns Quattro.
In the case of the Corvette, there are two types of players: those who tune their own cars and those who use the pre-tuned Cross Corvette (which seems to be even faster). These fools just love sprint, circuit, and most of all speed trap races, and they use the Corvette's ridiculously fast top speeds and quick acceleration to dominate these types of races. Supposedly, the automatic Corvette is even faster than the manual version, so there is even less skill involved in using it. Corvette drivers believe that due to the lack of turning power packed into the car, however, they are actually skilled drivers and love nothing more than to boast about their skills online.
As for the Audi, which only comes pre-tuned, players usually take advantage of its ridiculously fast turning speed in higher gears and quick acceleration. The Audi is not nearly as effective as the Corvette in straight areas and speed trap races, but it can out corner the American made muscle car any day of the week. On the Xbox online forums, Audi cheesers often try to justify their use of the car (since it is only unlockable after beating the career mode of the game) saying they worked very hard to earn the car and should now be allowed to use it as much as they want. Considering a decent driver can beat career mode inside of two days, their claim doesn't hold much water.
How to Beat Them: My favorite thing to do to these poor saps is to bring them on a canyon sprint or duel and bring my Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution IX or a Toyota Corolla and show them what skill is all about. However, in the case of sprints and speed trap races, your best bet is to simply build a better Corvette. Most Corvette drivers don't realize that acceleration does not come naturally and that torque upgrades exist for a reason. Having a top speed of 250mph doesn't mean much if it takes you a day to reach that speed. Tune your Corvette a little more toward the middle and blast these pretenders to the throne right off the road.
Initial D Arcade Stage ver.2: Acura Integra DC2
I've brought up the Initial D arcade game recently, and no good dip into the racing cheese hall of fame would be complete without mentioning the Acura Integra DC2. See, Initial D is a racing series that is all about cornering and drifting, and the Integra is a front wheel drive, front engine car. It's not designed for drifting at all. Yet thanks to a simple coding snafu, this car became the racers choice in the 2nd version of Initial D: Arcade Stage.
The Integra was accidentally given the ability to hit walls without losing speed. Basically, a player could screw up a turn and scratch the side of a wall but keep moving as if nothing had happened. On top of that, this front engine front wheeled car was also given the ability to drift unnaturally, for reasons no one could possibly figure out. Despite this, players flocked to the car. These were the same people who constantly used the '86 Toyota Corolla and Mazda Rx-7 FC in the first version of the game, when those two cars were significantly overpowered.
How to Beat it: There has thankfully been a 3rd version release of Initial D: Arcade Stage which has removed the Integra as a threat (while making the Rx-7 FC a perfectly decent car again). However, when dealing with version 2, the Integra is still beatable. The key here, like many cheesy moments in gaming, is to focus on the lack of skill the Integra makes up for. In this case, players can be relatively careless about hitting walls The key here is to pick a car that is fast on turning speed like an Rx-7 FD and to use that to your advantage. Since Integra drivers tend to let their cars slide to the outside while carelessly hitting walls, try to use and outside to inside motion to pass them on each turn. On the narrowest turns, you can even make an Integra driver plow front first into walls, and no amount of coding will save them there.
The Anger
I really, really hate cheap, cheesy gamers. It's one thing to use the same tactic over and over. If an opponent keeps falling for the same tricks, it's their own fault and they need to adjust their strategies accordingly. But too many games are imbalanced in their challenge and because of this, front runner players who take advantage of these imbalances ruin the game for all of us. Don't give up, because when you finally do get skilled enough to the point where these wannabes and their advantages don't matter anymore, victory will be that much sweeter. Until then, embrace the hatred.
