The SIXAXIS 04.03.07
Posted by Andrew Mellick on 04.03.2007
Is Snake gonna die? What will we see in FEAR? Can I be in a rock band? Can the PS3 get even more awesome? All this and more will be answered, come join me wont you?
I don't wana close my eyes, I don't wanna fall to sleep cuz I'd miss you Sony and I don't wanna miss a thing!
Welcome fellow Sony-ites to another action packed, balls to the wall edition of The SIXAXIS. This weekend I took the time to see Will Ferrel's latest masterpiece, Blades of Glory. Now the term "Oscar worthy" is thrown around a lot these days so I'm going to use a new one "Oscar sure thing". Check it out, it's a winner!
Welcome to the big show!
Sony News
That thing needs more power!
In what could be considered a direct answer to Microsoft's 120GB 360, Sony has put in papers to the FCC last month revealing that they are now going to be releasing an 80GB PS3 for users who want even more hard disk space on their next-generation consoles. What the actual price is of this nifty little upgrade will be remains to be seen.
If Sony is smart, and I like to think that they are, they will release this new system at the current market price of the PS3 and drop the price of the 60GB version. Some have guessed that Sony would drop the 60GB version all together, but I really don't see that happening.
On a side note, I'm always happy when I can use a 1990's sitcom to illustrate a story.
Yes children come climb me. HAHAHA!
In what is sure to strike a deadly blow to the Playstation generation, a British newspaper has reported an alarming number. Yes, the children of the world are slowly being killed by the video games they are enslaved to! According to researchers, kids suffering from Repetitive Strain injuries have increased by 35% since 1999. What about injuries from falling out of trees you ask? Well…that's down 36% but that's not the point.
A man by the name of Alan Shock laments this horrible downturn in our society. "My children are never happier than when they're up a tree. I used to climb trees when I was younger and my friend fell out of a tree and broke his leg. Now I don't think I even see children climbing trees, apart from my own kids. It's the culture we are in - the computerized age." He went on to say "At least climbing trees gives kids an appreciation of our surroundings. But playing computer games doesn't really teach us anything. It's easy to end up sitting indoors for hours on end."
If you go on to read the rest of the article you find out that Mr. Shock runs a company called the "Mighty Oak Tree Climbing Co." So there could be a possible conflict of interest here. No doubt Mr. Shock is missing the kick back he gets from the killer trees who feed off of the little children that climb them.
Speaking as a parent, I think I would rather my child got a sore wrist or something from playing video games as opposed to a broken leg falling out of a tree in the name of "knowing her surroundings". In all seriousness, big Al Shock hit the nail on the head and didn't even know it. He said his kids climb trees. Why: because he makes them. You're the parent, make them shut off the games for a few hours, it isn't hard, and you're bigger than they are. Just take it away. That's the big answer to all these problems. Also, does anyone find it ironic that this man is all about trees and the way he chooses to voice his opinion is in the newspaper?
Prisoner 1: There goes all the PS3's. Prisoner 2: No more whacking it to hi def.
According to UK Home Secretary John Reid, the prisons in the UK will not allow prisoners to have PS3's. Turns out they don't like the idea of the possible wi-fi connection that PS3 has to link up to the PSP. I suppose that's a good idea to not allow prisoners access to radio frequencies.
The UK made a similar decision for a very different reason sometime back. It was decided that the PS2 would no longer be allowed in prisons due to all the porn that was watched on said devices. Also a good decision because honestly, its not prison without a healthy dose of anal rape.
Because nothing is more terrifying than a little girl with five o'clock shadow
FEAR (First Encounter Assault Recon) has already been released for the PC and 360 respectively. But on April 24th, the ultra scary FPS hits the ultra powerful PS3. Here are some juicy tid bits dropped in an interview with Senior Producer Rob Loftus on what to expect. (source: playfuls.com)
-New "instant action" mode added. It plays like a shooting gallery where the player will go up against wave after wave of enemies. The idea is to see how long you can survive as the enemy's numbers and AI are ratcheted up.
-A new weapon along with a brand new mission that takes you to the Armacham disturbance - basically the incident that was the trigger for the events of FEAR.
-There will be online play of up to 16 opponents at launch
-FEAR will not support the SIXAXIS
I have to say I'm pretty excited for this title. I've managed to hold off playing the 360 and PC versions in anticipation for it. I'm glad they actually added some substantial content other than "brand new storyboards" and "character models". Although, I was really hoping for some use out of the motion sensing SIXAXIS: but I guess it'd be pretty frustrating when the screen shook every time I trembled in fear.
Snake? SSSNNAAAKKEEEE!!!!
Could MGS4 Guns of the Patriots be the end for the legendary Solid Snake? The rumors have been flying for months about this, and in an interview with gametrailers, the voice of Snake himself, David Hayter only heightened the curiosity.
"As bad as it gets for Big Boss, Solid Snake gets really screwed over," he warned. "I don't know yet, as we aren't done with the script, but what I'm trying to give is the sense that it is his last mission, and he knows it. He's deteriorating, he's aging badly."
He then demonstrated Snake's new voice, which has been reduced to a gravelly rasp. "This game will represent the ultimate in cynicism from Solid Snake," Hayter went on to say. "He's been screwed over in every possible way, so I think he knows this is his last opportunity to tell the soldiers around him what he's learned."
I've had a man crush on Snake since I first popped in a demo of MGS I picked up at Pizza hut. I've been through the highs and the lows. I've love the way the story is told. Each game brings about more conclusions and even more mysteries, all the while highlighting controversial themes such as war, right and wrong, and duty.
While I'll be sad to see it end, I think it is a fitting way to go out. I would much rather see this happens then a million sequels. There are plenty of characters that could branch off into other stories, I doubt we'll see the end of the entire franchise, but if this is Snake's last ride, I'm sure he goes out in a blaze of glory. I'll just bow my head, shed a tear, and thank God I won't see a MGS67 Snake vs. Sonic.
For those about to rock!
In what is some of the most ass kickingest news I've ever heard, Harmonix the guys that brought you the digital shredder Guitar Hero are hard at work on another project.
What is the Project? Well its a little title that plans to go above and beyond Guitar Hero by featuring guitar, drum, and microphone peripherals. Rock Band is scheduled to be available for the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 this holiday season.
You read that right, time to assembly your geeky friends…I mean your band mates and get your rock out! This is one of the most innovative and ambitious projects ever. It was bound to happen eventually but I would never have guessed it would have happened so soon. If it's done right, we could be seeing the future of gaming. I don't even want to think about the price, but if it means I'll get laid…I mean jam like a rockstar, then money is no object!
New Releases
Launch of the week!
Prince of Persia: Rival Swords: The Prince is back, this time on the PSP to face his sworn enemy. These games are always a blast, can't wait to see it on the handheld.
PS3
Enchanted Arms: Looks like a straight port from the 360. I'll be skipping this one.
PSP
Pimp my ride: Now I can take Xzibit anywhere. Oh joy!
Bliss Island: Looks like it's another puzzle game. I'll be skipping this one too because Ignorance is bliss. (ya get it?!)
Survey of the week
If Snake does die, which character would you like to see have his or her own game? Obviously it'd be some kind of prequel, backstory type game.
Yes they are back in control 9%
Not yet, but they made up some ground 43%
They are at least in the race now 40%
They will never win. I hate Sony, but really I just feel inadequate in their presence 7%
Well, looks like the blockbuster launch has finally brought some of you naysayers around. Good I'm glad to see it. The playing field is even now, let the console wars begin!
Bargain Bin
Well, I have been holding off on covering this game for two reasons, one I thought everybody had played it and two it was way too expensive, even used, for the bargain bin. Well, times have changed. It is now available for download on the 360 and is soon to be available on the PS3. So price is no longer an issue.
As far as people playing it, I found out a good friend of mine had very little experience with it, when I convinced him to download it or be pelted with rocks, he complied and in the process found a new game to love
If you haven't played this game, it is without a doubt the best side scrolling adventure game ever! The action is fast and the game is huge as you search ever corner of Dracula's castle in search of your foe.
As Alucard, Dracula's son, you have come to put your father to rest once and for all and rid the earth of your cursed blood line. Along the way you unfold a very interesting story.
Not only is there tons to explore, but there is also tons to find. With weapons, magic, and armor, you can become more or less unstoppable by games end. It's a lot of fine and will keep you glued to the TV for hours.
Download: $10.00
Youtube Theatre
Here's a look at Prince of Persia Rival Swords for the PSP.
Pictures for Ashish
This is a new section to the column. Those faithful readers out there who have been on board for while know that this column is always accompanied by the exact same picture on the main page.
Well this section is my plea to site editor, Ashish, to use a new picture. Each week I will put in a new picture in hopes to sway the almighty hand of Mr. Editor. This week's pic goes off of a tried and true concept. Sex sells and T and A on this site garners you some plush main page action, so for you Ashish old buddy, all you can handle!
Sure I could have slapped up some boobies, but who rocks the elbow shot anymore? Nobody! Tell me that's not front page material.
I don't want to cram pimpage
Damian Sarcuni takes on one of the most controversial gaming franchises ever, Grand Theft Auto.
Nintendophiles is back with news and….stuff. I don't know I skipped to the end where he admitted Sony rocked the UK launch! Its a must read!
