The Negative Edge News Report 06.06.07
Posted by Tommy Coloma on 06.06.2007
Hollywood's video game movie logic, a game you would not want others to know that you have, major announcements that aren't so major, and More!
Sorry about last week. I had a few things going on so I wasn't able to put out a news report. First I attended Celebration IV over in LA. It was a fun experience. The highlight for me was taking a bunch of execution-style pictures with people who were dressed up as Storm Troopers. Can you believe that some fans spend over $5000 just to create their costumes? Now that's hardcore! I also attended Fanime over in San Jose since someone was selling a modded DOA 4 stick at the event. I was only able to attend the last day so I didn't see much. I did get to try out Senko No Ronde (fun game but not worth the $60 price tag) in the game room and I saw an arcade version of Melty Blood: Act Cadenza (one of the few in existence in America) which was also cool. To top things off I had a job interview which was a lost cause to begin with seeing as how the recruiter that got me the interview screwed things up. I'll tell you guys one thing - I won't compromise this news report to do an interview ever again. I felt bad all week. Anyway, lets get started -
The news as I see it
Not Tom Cruz, Nicolas Cage, Johnny Depp, or Keanu Reeves? What happened to Hollywood logic?!?!
When it comes to movies based on video games, there are two major concerns that most gamers have. The first is over who the director will be. Everyone knows that if the director isn't Uwe Boll or Paul Anderson, the film has a better than average chance of being decent. Once that hurdle is crossed, the next concern would be the actors. For the most part, I can't really blame Hollywood for all the crappy choices they've made over the years. I'm sure that it's pretty hard to find well known actors and actresses that resemble video game characters. If Van Damme didn't play Guile, who else could they have picked? Mortal Kombat worked because all the actors/actresses sorta kinda looked like their video game counterparts. Except for Shang Tsung, but he was badass so that was ok. Angelina Jolie as Laura Croft? Well... Who's complaining?
But sometimes, the perfect choice gets handed to them on a silver platter and Hollywood just chooses to ignore the opportunity. Take the Hitman film for instance. Everyone knows that Jason Statham would have made a perfect Agent 47. Just look at him. All you have to do is shave his head and give him a red tie! But who does Hollywood pick? Some guy from a TV show that was probably hot when the film was first announced. Now whatever show he was on has been cancelled and we have some guy that nobody knows about in another video game movie because Hollywood thinks that flavor-of-the-month actor + video game franchise = win.
Fortunately, Onimusha fans can breathe a sigh of relief since, according to dvdrama.com (via AICN), Takeshi Kaneshiro, the man whose likeness was the basis for the main character in the video game series, will be in the movie. If you've seen Returner then you know that he can at least do action movies. So they've got the director that did Silent Hill (which was decent for a video game movie) and an actor that IS the main character from the games and that can actually act (and speak good English) and a largish budget ($70 mil). This is a movie that fans can reasonably look forward to... for now...
If all goes well, maybe we might get another video game movie sequel with an even more impressive cast list...
You've got to ask yourself, is this a game that you can proudly display with your other games?
A few years ago I got into a conversation with one of my friends about what would make a great stocking stuffer for children who have been bad. Coal is a little outdated so that was out. By then I was already into video games so I knew it had to be a game that even children wouldn't like. Somewhere in the conversation a game called Cho Aniki came up. Gameplaywise, it could be ok, but honestly, can you imagine the look a child's face after starting one of these games up?
For those of you that don't know what the hell I'm talking about, the Cho Aniki series stars (except for the first game where they were only side characters) two musclebound guys in Speedos who shoot projectiles out of their heads. Since I've never actually played any of the games (maybe I'll hit them up on an emulator some time this week), I've presented some choice words from everyone's favorite site, wikipedia -
As far as the pretense goes, the game is still a bodybuilding themed shooting game without direct references to homosexuality. The relationship of Samson and Adon, the two central characters of the game, are always described in terms of friendship and mutual love for bodybuilding. The two have never been described as lovers. All suggestive poses taken by characters are supposed to be "posing routine" of bodybuilding competitions. However, there are numerous indirect but obvious reference to gay culture or homosexual innuendo—In Japanese gay culture, aniki refers to the one which takes more dominant (senior) role in relationship as in male equivalent of "butch", similar to how the word "daddy" (or sugar daddy) is sometimes used as a reference to older male lover. Usually, aniki (or butch in the West) is considered to be more masculine, hence the title, Super Aniki, i.e. Super Gay Brothers (or Super Butch Brothers).
All I have to add is that the 6th game in the series (yes, it was "popular" enough to spawn 5 sequels) was called Chō Aniki Seinaru Protein Densetsu, or "Legend of the Holy Protein." I hate using this phrase, but, need I say more?
Now, according to Dengeki Online (via Arcade Renaissance), it would appear that Cho Aniki fans everywhere will get another dose of CA goodness some time in the near future.
As of now, details are scarce. My prediction? A Nintendo Wii game that makes liberal use of the Wii remote and vibration function.
You have a major announcement? I don't believe you!
Lately, it seems like the big trend these days is to use a countdown timer or to flat out make an announcement about an upcoming big announcement. I'm all for that if the announcement is, you know, special. The latest "major" announcement that was hyped up was one for today (Tuesday). So what was revealed? Would you be happy if I said Pac-Man Championship Edition, which is an exclusive for the Xbox 360? Me neither. Normally, I would have blown this off because all it really is is Pac-Man with higher resolution graphics and newer mazes. However, one thing that stand out about the announcement was the fact that Pac-Man's original game designer had a major role in the creation of this updated version. Even though it's been 26 years since he made the original mazes, I'm glad that MS didn't go with some random intern or someone else to create the new mazes. Oh yeah, this game is supposed to be released some time this week.
I'm sensing a theme in this week's column
According to Insert Credit, Doki Doki Majo Shinpan, that game where players are supposed to touch girls in different places in order to find out whether or not they are witches, will apparently not discriminate based on gender.
On a separate, and mildly disturbing note, someone at a forum that I frequent asked "what the FUCK is that kid covered in?" That's easy to answer - It's a game on the Nintendo DS that's licensed by Nintendo. What do you think? Geez.
Don't worry though. There'll be plenty of this, I'm sure -
It'll happen... When pigs fly!
The PC mod community has had it good for years. New maps, skins, and weapons - anything you can think of, they can do. I have fond memories of playing Doom with an Army of Darkness theme and screwing around with the Super Prison Break map in Red Alert 2. In fact, I think I had more fun with those two games using mods and fan created maps than when using official graphics and maps. As of now, fan created stuff appearing on consoles is almost unheard of. Sure, Counter-Strike was popular enough to be brought to the console masses, but how often does something like that happen? It's not like there isn't hope though. In a recent interview with Kikizo, Mark Rein stated that "We're definitely going to try and have the capability of people who make mods using the PC tools to bring them over [to PlayStation 3 or Xbox 360]. We don't want to get too specific about that, as there's still a lot of hoops for us to jump through with the console manufacturers, and they don't like us announcing their stuff."
It's nice to know that someone with at least some power is interested pc-to-console mods. It probably won't happen in this generation, but at least the ball is rolling. Some day I'll be able to play a version of Super Prison Break on a console. I just know it!
Game over man! Game over!
Today, if a movie is going to be a hit, more likely than not a video game based on said movie will be created. That's all well and good, but what about movies that came out in the 70s, 80s, and 90s? Movies like Predator, Robocop, or Phantasm II (it's all about the quad-barreled shotgun). Sure, some of these have already had games based on them in the past, but most of them sucked (I heard that Jurassic Park on the Genesis was ok though). Even though they are older movies, it would be nice to see next-gen games based on them. Of course, the games actually have to be good. The Warriors and The Godfather came out ok so hopefully the trend will continue. Hey! It's slightly better than having 3 or 4 sequels to an already existing game francise.
Thankfully, one of my favorite movies from back in the day will be given the next-gen treatment. According to Eurogamer, both an "Aliens-inspired first-person shooter" and an RPG based in the Aliens universe are in development. Now, if they'd only give my other faves a shot...
The Week In Releases
Zelda 2 (Wii VC)
Out of all the cartridge based Zeldas, this one is my favorite, followed, of course, by the first one. Unfortunately, I seem to be a minority here since everyone else seems to hate this game. I don't get why. To me, this is one of the best side-scrollers on the system. The music, the RPGish elements, using things you find in the castles to progress further - it's all top notch. Plus, it's got one of the best weapon upgrades ever - the down thrust. Seriously, why isn't type of attack in more side scrollers? It's just so worth going through the game just to get that ability. Seriously, when you first get it you be like - "that's so awesome!"
Tomb Raider Anniversary (PC, PSP, PS2)
I never played all the way through the original. This'll give me an excuse to do so...
Crush (PSP)
I saw a gameplay video for this a little while ago and thought that it looked interesting. It still doesn't sell the system for me but if I had a PSP I'd definitely consider purchasing it.
That will be 255 Rupees please
Tomb Raider: Anniversary (PS2) for the sweet price of $20
Over at Best Buy they're having a sale on the PS2 version of this game. You can check it out over here. I'm not sure if the price is the same at their physical locations, but this does appear to work online. I'd prefer the PC version personally, but at $20, the PS2 version is a steal!
Note: To get a high resolution version, you have to first go to the DA site by clicking on the picture. Then, just click on the picture again or the magnifying glass with a + in the middle. The picture that you see in this column is just the small view...
Tomb Raider first came out when I was a freshman in college. My roommate got the game and described Lara as being "all that AND a bag of chips." I always thought that she was always kinda blocky, even with the resolution turned all the way up. Things sure have changed, haven't they?
That's it for this week. Nothing I'm doing seems to work but I heard that if all else fails, I should use fire. If that advice is helpful, I'll be back next week.
