Working Title 12.21.07: 1st Annual Workies - Nominations

Posted by Jordan Williams on 12.20.2007

It's the end of the year, that means it's time for year end awards! Where you might see the standard "Best First Person Shooter" in other places, only here will you see "The Crowning Achievement in Douchebaggery"! Who's been nominated for what? Check it out.

Welcome to the #1 Column to EAT IT'S WORDS (turns out after spending a weekend with Virtua Fighter 4 and 5, I can't put it down), WORKING TITLE! Well, this will be one of the last columns before the year's end. So I figure with everyone else doing it, I might as well toss together some little award column...with a twist.

The 1st Annual Workies are upon us, well...the nomination issue, anyway. This week I am going to be posting the categories and nominees for this years awards, which will be decided by a combination of three things.

• Direct Comments


• Emailed Feedback


• A panel of my friends including myself

So, it's all down to you, me, and a few of my buddies. So without further ado, let's go ahead and list off those categories and the nominees!


1st Annual Workies: Nominations Issue

Note: I understand that some of these choices may seem odd at first, but it is a personal choice of mine to not nominate games for awards that I haven't played. I haven't had a lot of PS3 and Wii play this year, so if the nominees seem a bit heavy for the 360 side, I apologize. I DID however take suggestions from friends who do own PS3 and Wii games. Also this is NOT meant to be an all encompassing award column, so do not expect console specific categories and the like. It's just meant to be off beat and entertaining.


Game Mechanic/Character That Can Die in A Fire

Sure, there have been some great games this year, but has there been a certain moment or person in a game that you just wished died? A level that was just too annoying for its own good? A character that you just didn't want around anymore? Well, we here at Working Title feel your pain...and hope they die in a fire.

Informant Missions (Assassin's Creed). Eavesdropping, Pick pocketing, Interrogation. All of these were find and dandy in AC, but there was one mission type I hated above ALL else, it was Informants. The flag tags were completely fine, but when those all went away and were replaced with the mind numbingly annoying assassinations...well; it just started to get bad. It wasn't that finding the marks and disposing of them was a problem...it's just that they ALWAYS had to walk near one of the trouble makers who just seemed inexplicably drawn to shoving poor Altair into someone, thus blowing his cover.

Akira Yuki (Virtua Fighter 5). What do I hate more than the really fast characters in fighting games? The really fast and CHEAP characters in fighting games. Akira Yuki is at the top of my list for both of them. He's damn near impossible to cope with in single player, and if you are a poor bastard who ends up running into a skilled Akira player online, you'd best just get on your knees and pray...because you'll never touch the ground again.

Kaidan Alenko (Mass Effect). Hey, I can get a bit personal. Kaidan is an alright guy...really...but he reminds me too much of his best buddy Carth Onasi. So I am going to punish you for Carth's overall amounts of fail. That and you are a really annoying character. Ashley > Kaidan.

F.O.E(Etrain Odyssey). I don't know if many people gave this game much play, but if they did they know that this was one of the most annoying aspects of an otherwise GREAT old school RPG title. You've probably heard the wonderful song as well...F.O.E's were pretty much the worst type of bosses ever...they were hard, random, followed you...and very...very cuddly.

Other. That's right. I'm going to tack this on to categories I feel didn't get a great representation from me, it allows you all to pick and choose a nominee that I may have passed over or missed. Keep in mind this is not picking a WINNER, but it puts its name in the hat. The one that gets the most votes will be put in against the other one that got the most votes and will be decided on by my panel of buddies.


King Leonidas' Manliest Badass Character Award

Who better to judge a contest of manliness and badass other than King Leonidas himself? This award goes out to the character in 2007 that came across like the baddest of the badasses. We shall salute them with a ten pound steak and a DVD copy of Old Yeller, nothing says manly like man tears.

GlaDOS (Portal). I never said that this category was male only, in a year of a ton of badasses; there were quite a few that were badasses for completely different reasons. GlaDOS is one of those types. Sure, she didn't do much outside of talking for the majority of the game, but at the epic final showdown with her, she kicked into her badass mode with the neurotoxins and the missiles. Remember, being a badass means you can talk a lot of shit, too.

Altair (Assassin's Creed). Silent, deadly, and missing a finger. Those are all signs of a badass in my eyes. Sure, his great x50 grandson Desmond is a whiny little bitch but Altair more than makes up for his descendant's shortcomings. Plus, you have to be a real man to leap 80 feet from a tower into a bail of hay...or Jeff Hardy.

Tequila(Stranglehold). This game sort of just slid it's way under the radar when it finally was released, but there's no denying that Tequila wasn't a badass in this really fast action shooting game. He doesn't say much, and he seems to have the arm dexterity of a god...but when he shoots DOVES FLY. If that's not worth a nomination, I don't know what is.

Nathan Drake(Uncharted). You know, it's VERY hard not to call a man who runs around the jungle, leaping off of cliffs, shooting bad guys, hunting treasure, and still has enough time to give PS3 a sleeper hit a manly man. Nathan is all of these and more and a worthy nominee for MBC Award.

Master Chief(Halo 3). In the same vein, it's very hard not to call a guy who single handedly saves the planet from total destruction, fights off zombie aliens, maintains an alliance with a previous enemy, and only says less than 30 words the whole time a manly man either. In a bit of a forgone conclusion, MC is nominated for Leonidas' praises.


Best Game to Play to Feel Like a Woman

Admit it, as a guy you sometimes sit around and watch a chick flick. Sometimes you might catch yourself slipping and turn on an episode of Gilmore Girls. You might've even know the words to an "I'm Every Woman" by Whitney Houston. It doesn't matter, I don't think any less of you. Now the same applies when it comes to games, there are just some games blatantly advertised to the ladies...but men like to play them, too.

Rock Band (Mic). Yeah, you read that correctly. Sure, Rock Band gives you the chance to completely rock the fuck out like a madman most of the time. But what about the poor sap who's on the mic when "Celebrity Skin" or "So Sick" comes up? Sure, you can make your voice deep and try to but some balls in it...but you're still trying to sing like Courtney Love and Lacey Mosely.

MySims. Sorry guys, but damn near every person I know who devotes a lot of time to this (and The Sims 1/2) has a vagina. I know there are some guys out there that play this game a lot, but go to any Sims modding website and you'll be hard-pressed to find a guy player out there. Plus, when you spend a good chunk of the game designing furniture and decorating your house...you can't help but feel A LITTLE feminine.

Because I am decidedly NOT a female, I called in some help for the final two noms, let's welcome back Jis the (former) Editor!

Jis: Thank you, Jordan, for having the sense to call in an expert! ...That's a bit arrogant, isn't it? Just teasing; thanks for letting me stop in and help out with the nominations this year.

Beautiful Katamari. What happens when you combine bright colors, upbeat Japanese pop music (Isn't that redundant?), and a sticky ball that picks up everything in sight? You end up with one b-e-a-utiful katamari. Although this game appeals to both genders, heading to the pub and telling the boys about how you "line danced with your forty-odd cousins" could easily be misunderstood.

Cooking Mana: Cook Off. Cooking Mama: Cook Off (Wii). Once upon a time, gamers' knowledge of the kitchen was shamefully limited. The more adventurous ones among us would put packages of edible things in the microwave regardless of whether or not the items in question were meant to be nuked. Then, the enigmatic Mama came into our lives and taught us how to wash rice and peel prawn in the privacy of our own homes. Male gamers (seemingly mysteriously) began to cook for their girlfriends, and there was much rejoicing. The rest, as they say, is history.


Not with a Bang, but a Whimper Award

We've all seen it. These are the games that get so much hype and buzz during the year and when they are finally released they just tend to go away. No lasting feeling, no nothing. It doesn't mean the game is bad, it just mean the game didn't catch on. What were the games that didn't hit with a Bang, but a Whimper in 2007?

Overlord. Remember when this game was all over the place? It didn't get as much buzz as some of the other titles out there, but it had enough for people to take notice of it and hail it as a Pikmin for the older gamer. But then it got released to fairly average scores and a lukewarm reception and just sort of fell off.

Kane and Lynch: Dead Men. The GameSpot Controversy not withstanding, it's still fairly obvious that this game did not live up to its hype. It was widely advertised, widely talked about, and even made a cover story for Game Informer but then it was released to yawns and apathy, even before GameSpot's now infamous review.

Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games. It was 20 years in the making and this is what happened. The fact that it was a bad game doesn't really matter much, it was just that for such a landmark occasion as the first ever Mario and Sonic game, it was rather lukewarm reception and a scathing response. Maybe SSBB will make up for it.

Lair. It was first on tap to be PS3's break out hit of the year, but instead it was marred by a bad control scheme and a general lack of care by the audience and it quickly shuffled it right down the tubes into Used Game territory. It's a good thing PS3 had Ratchet and Clank and Uncharted waiting in the wings.

Other. I know there's a lot more games out there deserving of this title, so I'm opening this one up to the Workaholics as well.


The Dormroom Dominator Award

This award is for that game that you will no doubt see being played on TVs in dorm rooms across America. Get a bunch of college aged males together, pony up the cash for some Mountain Dew and pizza and you have a virtual kegger on your hand. So which game is responsible for more 'I'm sick and didn't make it to class today' excuses?

Rock Band. When it came to Dormroom Dominators, usually the only sound you hear is either the sound of bullets or the sound of Madden. Now you hear the sound of bad singing to go along with it. It might not be as widely accepted but I don't think any group of drunken males would pass up the chance to spend the night singing their favorite old rock hits while their buddies jam out on digital instruments.

Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare. Guns? Check. Military based? Check. Badass Graphics? Check. There really isn't much else you need to know. CoD4 is a Dormroom Dominator because while it may lick the split screen style that comes with Halo, no doubt that a lot of people that own it live in the same area or on the same floor. I am sure this has resulted in many death threats over XBL.

Madden 2008. It's Madden. If you really need me to explain why this game is on the list, I highly suggest you seek help.

Halo 3. Now, this game has what CoD4 lacks in a sense. It has a very strong online play but it doesn't forget its split screened roots. You may need more than one Xbox for more than two players, but the fact is that two people can still comfortably play this on Xbox Live from the same console. This makes this a VERY fun way to get a group of guys in on the game and start a rotation effect.

Wii Play. Now, it may look out of place here, but I've seen what the power of a Wiimote inside of a drunken hand can do. You might not see too many Wii's littering college campuses, but when they do appear they tend to become the life of the party (not to mention chicks love 'em). Getting some people together, add booze, hand them a Wiimote. It's a recipe for sweet drunken disaster.


Crowning Achievement in Douchebaggery

Now this award isn't about a certain game, it more encompasses all of the news stories from this year. There's been a lot of great gaming news, but then there's been a lot of really shitty gaming news. This year we award the worst story (or douchiest person) in gaming this year.

V-Tech vs. Gamers. In a truly sad story earlier this year was the V-Tech shooting. While people were still trying to make sense of it there was a group (rather, a certain person) who was already climbing on the soapbox to blame the usual scapegoat in these situations. Gamers. Thompson and others were already to blame gamers and their hobby for the deadliest shooting in U.S history. Thankfully, it wasn't the case and they all ended up looking like fools. I just hope that one day we never really are to blame for something as vile as this.

Red Ring of Death. You know it. You love it. It hates you. The Xbox 360 Red Ring of Death has risen to such a high standard that it can actually be called a normal human now. It's like some sort of digital serial killer that stalks it's victims by rendering their consoles useless at the worst possible times. Microsoft is finally combating this evil foe, but that doesn't make up for the fact that for the better part of 2007(and still going into 2008) that it had tons of Xbox 360 owners gripped in fear.

Delays, Delays, Delays. Metal Gear Solid 4, Super Smash Brothers Brawl, Grand Theft Auto 4. Now we know that the one rule of next gem gaming is that the game rarely EVER comes out on time. But this year saw a huge rash of heavy hitters for each console getting pushed back. Now this may not be scream douchebaggery to SOME people, others who have been waiting for these games forever tend to scream foul when this happens. Let's just look at Spore which is quickly becoming the Duke Nukem Forever of our generation.

The Manhunt 2 Saga. In the best soap opera ever for the first half of the year was the epic Manhunt 2 Saga and what followed afterwards. ESRB had dropped the death rating of AO on Manhunt 2 which effectively meant that it wasn't going to be sold in stores. This sparked a big argument about the basis of which video games are rated versus movies. Movies like Hostel and Saw get almost no resistance when released in the box office but games like Manhunt, which showcase the same content, are constantly blocked or censored. Then Manhunt 2 finally passed the grade and it sparked a whole NEW argument about whether the ESRB (and other rating boards) were doing its job right to let such a game on the market. In the end what we got was an overly censored game (which killed a lot of its focus and point) and a big of pile of douchebaggery from both sides of the argument.


Most Memorable Video Game Quote/Moment of 2007

Now, while this year had a ton of stories like the above, it also made for some pretty great moments of greatness. But what stood out as a defining moment on the year? Was there a quote that just completely made it all worth it?

"Welcome to Rapture.". And with those words, Bioshock was born. In a year that was no doubt going to be plagued with futuristic shooters and Xbox Live only games, Bioshock appeared after the great(if not underrated) The Darkness and bestowed yet another fantastic first person experience. The game itself was great, but these three words started it all and will always be remembered as the first time you shat yourself in excitement and fear...the first of many.

Newcomer - Sonic. My thoughts on this are well documented, but to not say it wasn't a big moment of 2007 would be a gross misjudgment. Ever since Snake was last year the rumor mill began churning and for once it churned out a winner. When people loaded up the Smash Brothers Dojo update that night you could literally feel the gaming world explode with joy. Finally Sonic gets his chance to shine right alongside Mario in what is shaping up to be the most anticipated game of 2008 across ALL consoles. Hopefully this will fare better than their trip to the Olympics.

"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" That's the sound you made while playing through the final level of Halo 3 this fall. After a bumpy ride and an underwhelming final boss, you now had to manage to escape on a warthog while the world literally fell beneath you. It was one of the more pulse pounding experiences of the game that was only amplified with the more players you had on hand. If you tell me you didn't let out a Dukes of Hazzard YEEEHAW at the final jump, I'm going call you a liar right to your face.

"The cake is a lie...The cake is a lie...The cake is a lie..." Last week someone commented that many people don't know about Portal. My response is that at lot more people know about Portal than one would think. While it's not the public resource juggernaut that Halo and Mario are, it does have a very significant fan base. Anyway, Portal is mostly a game with WONDERFUL quotes, but this stood out as the most defining moment because you began seeing this early in the game and figured it was some sort of in-joke...little did you know that the cake really WAS a lie and that after the 'final test' your world was going to be turned on it's ear. This BARELY beat out "Still Alive".

The Rise of L-Block. This year we saw GameFAQs annual character tournament take an unfamiliar turn. Someone who wasn't silent, blonde, and sword user didn't win. Now there's been upsets in the past (see: Samus Aran) but I don't think ANYONE expected L-Block of Tetris Fame to come out on top as the winner this year. It'll be interesting to see if next year the tournament even happens and if another joke character gets the underdog treatment. L-Block, we salute you.

Other. You know the drill, folks.


Workaholic's Choice Game of the Year

There's really not much I can write here. If last week was ANY indication a lot of you disagree with me sometimes, which I personally LOVE. It lets me know that you all actually read what I say and can INTELLGENTLY respond to it, not the usual "zomg u sux" shit we see far too often in our inboxes. So now YOU get the choice here. What game do YOU think deserves to be Game of the Year? This will be strictly based on inbox and direct comment votes. So make it count, lest we have another L-Block situation on our hands.

Working Title's Game of the Year

Quite possibly the most 'normal' award of the whole thing, it's time for Game of the Year. This will also be the only award that has complete and equal representation from all consoles. It's a personal feeling of mine that Game of the Year categories should always include the best of the best of ALL consoles on the current market, not simply the best of the best in terms of reviews or fame. I'm looking at you Spike TV. Now, what makes this different is that this one will be decided by me and my panel of buddies. NOT the readers...thus why it's Working Title's Game of the Year.

Super Mario Galaxy. He's back, bitches. After the great but pretty dull Super Mario Sunshine, Mario is BACK with Galaxy and still proved that he is the platforming GOD. Not only did he sell a truckload of games, but he also managed to give the Wii the biggest (not only) hit of the year. It's good to know that people still appreciate the simple things in life.

Metroid Prime 3: Corruption. Before Mario this year, there was Metroid. Samus brought the first person shooter genre to the Wii the RIGHT way earlier this year. She succeeded where Red Steel had obviously and painfully failed. It gave Wii another hit this year and let everyone know that while Wii might be the casual console, it can still attract the hardcore gamers if it wants to.

Uncharted: Drakes Fortune. PS3 had a hit on it's hand again this year, while Metal Gear Solid 4 was sorely missed they at least tried to make up for it with Uncharted and to a point they succeeded. Helped along by the PS3's GIANT price drop, Uncharted may not be as highly rated as some of the others on the list, but it was a huge success for the PS3.

Ninja Gaiden Sigma. Although it's essentially a re-release of a game, it's still a re-release of a GREAT game. Furthermore, it's a Playstation 3 exclusive which just makes the pot even sweeter. Now if you can manage not to pop a blood vessel at the anger inducing difficulty, you will see that NGS is a GREAT game which looks FANTASTIC on the PS3. NGS showed that the PS3 exclusive isn't exactly dead...it's just taking a year off.

Halo 3. There's no way I would be able to sleep tonight if I didn't list this game in this category. It may not be everyone's cup of tea as it is widely regarded as overrated, but there is no doubt that it was one of the 360's biggest games this year. Halo 3 had a great single player mode (albeit short) but we all know why people are still coming back to it. Its matchmaking and online play are still unparalleled in the digital world and it's just so damn good. Halo 3 broke records this year, it broke wallets, and it just might be Working Title's GOTY.

Mass Effect. Now if Halo is here mostly for it's multiplayer qualities, than Mass Effect is here solely for it's single player story telling. There hasn't been a game quite like Mass Effect in a long time, possibly even EVER. You choices actually affected the outcome, you actually cared about the characters, and you really were SOMEONE in the game. You aren't the nameless silent hero that these games usually paint you ass, you had a personality, and you were someone. This was something that was sorely lacking in not just the genre, but in video games as a whole, and it's definitely something to be rewarded.

Now, I know some of you may be getting in a geek rage over the noms here...but if you look JUST ABOVE THIS CATEGORY there's Workaholics Choice. Mad that BioShock or Phantom Hourglass didn't make the cut? NOMINATE IT.

Working Feedback

I'm going to make it official, I LOVE the comments feature. It's a great way to get direct feedback and it also keeps me from having to paste emails in the column, although I still appreciate the ones who send emails in. Just a warning though, the people who send emails are more likely to get posted in the column, as with the comments I can just reply to them directly in the same column(something I will start doing more often).

However I did get two email feedbacks this week, first up is fellow 411Mania Games Writer James McGee of The Game Plan writes in with this.

Hey man, Game Plan Guru James McGee here. I just wanted to compliment you on a cool column, even if it was a short one. You dropped a lot of truth, and I'm especially glad to see people starting to wise up about the Wii. I think I've developed an unhealthy hatred for that console—not because of the system or the games themselves (I really AM a Nintendo fan; The Wii just isn't my thing, but to each his own)—but because of the fanaticism surrounding it. I just think Nintendo has managed to completely fool everybody with this one, and fans are drinking the Kool Aid. I'm just not a fan of blind stupidity, which the Wii seems to promote. As you predicted, you have to look no further than some of the comments you've received for proof. Anyway, keep up the good work.

P.S
Damn right Mystic Quest was awesome! That actually was my introductory RPG, and even though I still claim Final Fantasy III (Vi for the Japanelitist out there) is my favorite SNES game of all time, MQ really isn't all that far behind.

I think I'm in the same boat, I personally have no problem with the Wii itself as a console, I just have a problem with the way it's being marketed and handled. Trying to get the casual gamers and the like is great, we need to start giving the next generation of gamers, but abandoning the people who got you there in the first place seems like a bit of a slap in the face. There are great opportunities for games on the Wii, but Nintendo seems perfectly happy with just releasing party games, and now that it says it's not even interesting in western production, it just seems that it's only focusing on the Japanese market which eats this stuff up. As a Nintendo fan, I feel a bit offended...but oh well, I got a 360 now. And DAMN RIGHT MQ was awesome, that game seriously gets more flack that it deserves. Thanks for the feedback.

And just today I got another one from ScottH J regarding Massive Effect: Power Rangers:

Dude, I LOVE your idea. I also thought of a couple ideas you COULD add, to market to a broader audience (kids)
As I'm sure you remember there was a Blue kid Ranger. I think you know where I'm going with this.... giving players the option to start as a kid will probably draw more kids to it. I dunno, just a thought.
Also, even if a mmorpg couldn't be possible, it could be made into a console game, a lot like MarvelUA or XMen Legends. That way there's a single player element, of course only playing online in teams grants you certain team based buffs and or unlockable.

As for a WWE mmorpg, I have ALOT of ideas for that if you ever need any for a future column. I'm not joking, I'm serious. My friend and I actually laid out all the ground rules and guidelines.

Ah, Justin...the incredible growing ranger. That was definitely an interesting time for the series. As for your WWE MMORPG ideas, I'd really like to hear them so go ahead and send them to me.

Next Week...

Now that we know who is up for what, now it's time to find out who wins! Next week is the 1st Annual Workies Award Ceremony. Where we will hand out the awards for the categories above in a truly normal and text-like fashion. Be there...or...don't. I mean, it is two days after Christmas...you might still be playing your games.


Until next time, I'm Jordan Williams and HAPPY WORKING HOLIDAYS.