Achievement Unlocked 02.07.09: THQ Earns a Slammy

Posted by Rod Oracheski on 02.07.2009

411's Rod Oracheski takes a look at the Achievement list for Legends of Wrestlemania, challenging THQ to a no-holds-barred match with the Achievement Unlocked title up for grabs!



  Word that THQ might be surrendering the WWE license soon brings mixed emotions. On one hand, they're getting closer to turning the franchise around. On the other hand the improvements are a 'one step forward, two steps back' proposition at the moment, and they really don't seem to give a crap about Achievements - consistently turning in the worst lists among 'high level' developers. Maybe if EA gets the license we'll finally get a good game and list!

A meeting of titans

  Before that eventuality, if it ever truly does come to pass, we have Legends of Wrestlemania to look forward to - with the game's 1,000-point, 19-Achievement list revealed this week. Once again THQ takes the low road, refusing to do anything at all with the license that will tie it in to the source material. How can you have a game that's all about Wrestlemania's biggest legends and moments - and have the Achievement list not tie into that at all?

  There are a couple Wrestlemania moments that deserve to be honoured with Achievements, just off the top of my head. Take Wrestlemania 13, for example, and the famous (for saving the night) match between Bret Hart (his image appears on shirts seen in the audience of Legends of Wrestlemania screenshots, so it's likely he's going to be announced soon) and Steve Austin. If for some reason it doesn't jump into your mind, I'm talking about the no DQ submission match that ended with Austin, bloodied face screaming directly into a camera, passing out in the Sharpshooter and denying Hart the tapout victory. Give that a 10-point Achievement 'Tapped This Time' for submitting Austin as Hart - hell, even use that famous image of Austin's bloody face as the associated artwork.

  Or how about the Warrior taking down Hulkamania at Wrestlemania VI? Hogan jobs out via pinfall - now surely that's worthy of an Achievement, right? Warrior over Hogan via pinfall in the game gives you another 10-point Achievement, maybe call it 'Spirits of the Warriors' and have his easily recognized facepaint for the image?

  If you're up for seeing Hogan lose, why not recognize the Rock's triumph over him at Wrestlemania X-8? Get Hogan to do the J-O-B one more time and get another 10-point Achievement, 'Smelled What the Rock Was Cooking' and maybe the infamous raised eyebrow for an image. Or maybe some of that pie he was always talking about...

  Okay, okay - it's probably not fair to just pick on Hogan. Let him get the win with his iconic slam on a giant - no, let's show proper respect here, that slam was on the giant - Andre the Giant, from Wrestlemania III. Get the big slam on the big man and pick up a 25-point Achievement called 'Can You Believe It?' along with Hulkamania artwork, or maybe just a shockwave ripple.

He's toppled the Giant!

  There are other great matches to remember, but without a full roster I'm not sure who to include. Obviously Savage is out, so his big matches go with himl. That means Steamboat is probably forgotten as well - what other moments did he have? Beating Matt Borne at the first Wrestlemania probably isn't that big of a deal, and is Hercules really going to make the cut so they can replay their Wrestlemania II match?

  The game should include Greg 'the Hammer' Valentine, but does anyone want to remember Steamboat with his loss to Valentine in the tournament from Wrestlemania IV?

  Even a 'should be shoe-in' like Razor Ramon is questionable due to his, I guess we'll call it a 'storied,' history of alcohol abuse and all-around flakiness. That eliminates his stand-out ladder match with HBK from Wrestlemania 10. There's no chance Benoit will be in the game, so that eliminates his moment at Wrestlemania 20.

  Speaking of 'possible but unlikely' appearances, given his recent behaviour is Jake the Snake going to make the list? If so, and assuming they also find some reason to include Rick 'the Model' Martel, I'm hoping they give us a recreation of their amazing blindfold match from Wrestlemania VII!

  Oh, what a glorious time it was to be a wrestling fan! Watching those two wander around the ring for a few minutes before a bemused and increasingly bored crowd was, well let's just say that it can't be described adequately.

  Come on, THQ. I know that you're currently going through rough financial times but the best way to dig yourself out of that, besides firing tons of people, is to care about the games you're making. You throw that passion into the game and we'll care about it too. This kind of list? This reeks of just trying to make a quick buck before the roof falls in around you.

  There's no excuse for a half-assed Achievement list these days. It's proven to be a valid marketing and sales tool - and doing the J-O-B with this list, given how obsessed wrestling fans generally are, is poor form. I'm not saying that putting out top-quality Achievement lists would reverse your fortunes, but getting that passion back into your games sure couldn't hurt.

A whole lot of nothing...

  When I talked about the time- and stat-tracking software I was using last week I didn't expect it to get as many responses as it did - both as comments and e-mail. As I explained, it's still in the start-up stage and once it's finished I'll be sure to do a piece on it. While it's not useful for everyone I don't doubt it would be extremely valuable to quite a few people.

  When it works.

  As the display at right shows, the software can become bogged down in the minutiae in some games. Where it proved a valuable tool last week, showing that a few maps were almost criminally underutilized in the Team Deathmatch rotation (Makin for example, at just under half the time of the top map and at least an hour and a half less played than the top five or six maps) it just doesn't offer that for NHL 09. Perhaps there's some per-game level tuning that can be done to make it more interesting, I'm not sure.

  The software does work well to remind me how much time I've put into Legendary this week - three hours and 42 minutes. Not a terrible game, and one that people might want to check out if they find it in the bargain bins, but I can definitely see how it struggled at retail back when it launched. Controls are key - and they just don't work consistently in Legendary, particularly the way you'll be shunted sideways when you contact an object - often out from cover and into the firing lines of multiple enemies. Frustrating, but fortunately not all that common.

  I think I'm around halfway through Legendary, so it's shaping up to be an eight hour game. Not bad for a shooter I suppose, but I can't see the multiplayer options tacking on much time to this one - if any at all.

  I also burned through Afro Samurai in six hours and change, finishing the game's default difficulty level. The game was decent - the graphical style of the presentation was amazing, but the terrible camera control during boss fights really dragged down the overall experience. It was nice to see a Mature-rated game that got that rating for violence, some nudity, and profanity - but really didn't take those last two to gratuitous levels. You get the occasional swear word and there's one scene with some topless assassins...along with gallons and gallons of blood as you carve up every ninja in the world.

  Okay, so the violence might get a little gratuitous. I'll have some video up this week, check the forums or subscribe to the YouTube channel.

  Killzone 2, the PS3's latest saviour, arrived in demo form this week, and I'll also have gameplay footage of that this week for those interested. Unfortunately I had a minor disaster when trying to switch my PS3 from HDMI to component to capture - switching over gave me no picture at all. Doing the 'hold the button for the beeps reset' gave me a few options, a new addition from a recent update, but choosing the second one 'default settings' I think ended with me getting a picture again...and deleting my primary user profile entirely.

  Might need a little work on that particular process still...

  After getting my primary profile 'installed' on the machine again I tried to fire up the demo only to get an error that's entirely new to me - something about invalid copyright. That was it for me - the game was interesting but that was the limit of my patience on that night.

  From what I got to play prior to the Great Component Meltdown, the game looks great - if overwhelmingly gray. It'll remind people who've played far too much Fallout 3 of the landscape there, though with a more detail and less room to roam. The sound (if you have a 7.1 capable receiver) is the high point here, with the controls the low point. I've tried it a few times, adjusting the sensitivity higher, then lower - but I can't shake the 'sluggish' feeling they have.

  I've heard the argument that it's intentional but, like Resident Evil 5's 'you're a turret with legs' controls, I don't see how being intentional makes them good. The bottom line for me is that the '200 pound gun' swing that the controls have when you turn and aim just don't feel very fun.

  There's also some questionable AI here at times, though generally good if you stick to doing what you're supposed to do - if you go 'outside the box' on them, expect to see enemies that don't react all that well. One encounter in particular is either a couple minutes of gunplay with enemies moving from cover to cover in order to advance, or you running up and knifing them all down before they react. If you play the way it appears you're intended, you'll experience 'good AI' but if you deviate from that at all, the experience suffers.

  You don't get much of a taste from this very short demo, but FPS fans with a PS3 will probably enjoy this one. Just don't go into it expecting it to control as sharply as Call of Duty or Resistance 2. There's a learning curve to the controls, particularly the finger-fumbling required to shoot from behind cover, but it's the 'feel' of the controls that will likely cause the most unease for the first few tries.

  I don't know that this is going to be the system-selling saviour the PS3 faithful have been waiting for after Heavenly Sword, Lair, Haze, MGS 4, and LBP all fell short of that status - but at least it seems like it'll be a 'must buy' game, even if it's not a 'must buy console' title.

  Hopefully by the time Killzone 2 hits shelves, I'll have my 50" 1080p set back in action. The yellowing that I posted about in a recent column has gotten exponentially worse, and I've stopped gaming on it at all. Instead I'm using a 23" 1080p capable monitor - a fairly large difference in screen real estate. Sony said the piece is under warranty, the problem now appears to be getting the repair center to get off their asses and get out here to repair it.

  Until next week, I'm out.