B3yond the Report 03.03.09

Posted by Derek Robbins on 03.03.2009

In the latest edition of B3yond the Report, 411’s Derek Robbins discusses Midway putting Mortal Kombat up for sale, Playstation 3 price cuts, new stuff is coming to HOME, the weekly PSN update, B3yond the Cinema and more! Plus, Derek gives his thoughts on the newest Street Fighter movie! Check out the full column for all the details!

Hello and welcome to B3yond the Report, your weekly view into the world of Sony. As always, this is your host with the most Derek Robbins. Let's get this thing underway shall we?

B3yond the News of the Week



PS3 lifespan and cost updates

One of Sony's big selling points of the Playstation 3 to this point is how long the console is supposed to last. At one point in time, they even referred to it as future proof. Thanks to this, they've been able to excuse their reluctance to lower the price on the fact that they think you'll be paying $500 for 10 years of pure entertainment. It appears though that not everyone in the company is on board with this line of thinking.

SCEE President David Reeves would be the guy who says this. I doubt he'll get in trouble as his statement is pretty grounded in reality. It's just interesting to see someone from within Sony say that maybe, just maybe, this crazy Voltron system may not have the power go to all ten years. Here's what he had to say about it:

The competition will have new models on the market by the end of the PS3. I have no doubt and we'll have to be fast on our feet.....I don't know whether the PS3 lifespan will be eight, nine or ten years.

This is absolutely 100% correct. No matter how long the PS3 claims to be able to last, the other consoles will definitely have something else released between now and the alleged end of days for the monolith. I mean, do you honestly think that it'll be 2016 before we see Nintendo's next system or Microsoft's next? Absolutely not! Even if the PS3 technologically superior, if the others get the jump on Sony the PS3 will be viewed as a last-gen system and thus, inferior to the new dogs in the eyes of the casual gamer. Given how much money those crazy casuals generate, can Sony really afford this?

I will admit that sales this generation could be improved upon. Hell, most everyone feels the same way. The absolute best thing you could do for the next generation, whenever that is, is beat Microsoft - the company that started out last time – out the door. If you can get a year on them then maaaaybe you can get back to where you were with the PS2. Forget about Nintendo for now. Gotta be realistic.

Mr. Reeves still assumes that this generation will be longer than previous generations though. Maybe it's because of the power of the current systems or maybe it's because of the state of the non-gaming world…but that's just how it is. Reeves went on to say that the Playstation 4 is not on the horizon and wouldn't be for some time. This is the first time that someone from within Sony flat out said "no" instead of scooting around the word, so I am inclined to believe it.

So if this generation does indeed continue on for a long period of time, how do you improve the current sales of the system? I mean, the PS3 is just as good of a system as the 360 (if not better) but the price tag makes it hard for some gamers to jump on board. Well, industry analyst Mike Hickey says that not only will a price drop help the Playstation 3 along but it is also coming in a matter of days.

It's not like he's the only one who has been predicting this would happen. Hell, anyone with a keyboard has probably said at one point: "THE PS3 WILL HAVE A PRICE CUT MARK MY WORDS," but he seems pretty confident that Sony will announce a $100 cut in the next few days. Probably via press release or press conference.

Obviously, Sony wasn't going to be beat to the punch with any price cut news so a spokesperson told Game Daily: "There is currently no price cut planned." Yeah, I don't quite believe that. They went on to spout the company line that the Playstation experience isn't about price but is instead about great games and entertainment. Well that's true, but you do know with the economy the way it is, fewer people are willing to part with the money necessary to buy a PS3, especially when there's another system with similar graphics that can be bought for $200. I know people in Sony know this.

Of course, Hickey also said he has heard some outlandish things, such as a source telling him that Sony was working on a PS3 model that didn't back BLU-ray. This doesn't really make sense because, you know, that's how the PS3 plays games. Maybe he misinterpreted and Sony actually plans to release a model of the PS3 that only plays PS3 games and does not play BLU-ray movies. This would be kind of similar to the X-Box 1 which didn't have out-of-the-box DVD support but would allow you to play them if you bought a remote. That seems pretty far fetched to me.

So in short: A new console isn't coming any time soon but the PS3 may not last as long as Sony hopes. To sell consoles today instead of in the future, Sony could sure use a price cut and analyst Mike Hickey thinks Sony will announce their plans to do so in a matter of days. Sony flat out denied this though. What's next in this craaaazy PS3 drama? Well, I guess we'll just have to stay tuned. I imagine if there's a price cut I'll have to report on it, eh?

- Hey, with that extra $100 you could buy Valkyria Chronicles!

Mortal Kombat will be up for sale: Let's speculate!

Well, if you've been reading this site or, hell, ANY video game site over the past several months, you most likely know the woes that Midway is presently going through. The company has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy and is desperately trying to sell some of their properties in order to stay afloat and avoid being liquidated. They already sold The Wheelman to Ubisoft and raised about $6 million from that. Midway has set aside $3.75 million for employees if they manage to pawn the franchise off. The sale of MK is not official, but is one of the many options that Midway submitted to a court in order to get out of their little situation.

To say that it's sad to see Midway go down is a bit of an understatement. The corporation, at its peak, was the be all and end all of arcade gaming in America. I would say that their name used to be able to rival some of the bigger boys out there. That said, times have changed and thanks to the economy being the way it is…well, a struggling company like Midway had very little chance. So instead of mourning the possible demise of a company that was most likely going out of business soon anyhow, let's look at some other angles.

The most obvious one to me is having Capcom purchase the assets and have them start making MK-based games. While Capcom's biggest international rival is indisputably SNK, the arcade wars of the ‘90's in America have many people believing that Street Fighters' true rival is indeed Mortal Kombat. Given that the SNK brand is less popular in America than it is elsewhere, a meeting of Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter would be the sort of thing that would get many gamers excited as all can be. It would allow us to have all those dream matches that we pondered about in the ‘90's. Can Ryu beat Scorpion? Can Sonya stand a chance against Chun-Li? How the hell could any of the World Warriors take out Baraka? This would be an awesome chance to do that and, in North America at least, Capcom would have a huge money maker on their hands.

Mortal Kombat could also go to another company – such as SNK – who specializes in fighters and want to get a big name on their brand to get gamers excited. As apathetic as I am towards the MK franchise, there are a lot of people who swear by it to this day. Financially, it would make sense for a company like SEGA or SNK Playmore. After all, Sega has merged with publisher SAMMY – of Guilty Gear fame – and having another big named fighter under helm could only do wonders for them. Obviously this is just speculation, but under the right company perhaps a rivalry of fighting franchises could take place again.

There's also the possibility that Midway could just hang onto it and sell their other assets. Mortal Kombat is by far their most valuable commodity but they have other things that can probably sell for a little. I believe Midway has confirmed somewhere (though I lack proof) that TNA Impact 2 will not be published by them, but don't they still have the rights? Midway could very easily sell off the commodity to EA or another company and make a little scratch that way. Given how valuable MK is, can Midway really survive post chapter 11 bankruptcy without its flagship title? I'm not really sure.

Whatever the case may be, it's going to be very interesting to see how this all plays out. Mortal Kombat is still a name that can generate excitement, so I will be following just to see what happens to the once successful franchise. Will Scorpion be delivering fatalities to Charlie? Will Sonic be running alongside Jax? I have no idea. It is kind of fun to speculate on it though.



Playstation Home updates coming soon

For those of you still cruising around in HOME, I have some news on updates that are coming soon. I really don't have a whole lot to say about this since I haven't touched HOME since, well, ever, but hey…some of you have so I better spread the love. Ted the Dog, Home Community Manager, brings us these words. So thanks to him for all of this:

Street Fighter IV
The unlockable items are already available in Home and are rewarded for winning online matches in the game.
o Purchasable outfits will be available within a few weeks.
• Home Square
o A slightly updated Home Square will arrive in early March, possibly as early as the 5th.
• Uncharted: Drake's Fortune Space
o This is currently being worked on and we hope to release this for you within a few weeks
• SOCOM: CONFRONTATION Space
o This Space is also nearly ready but a specific date for its release is not yet available, but we are expecting it within a few weeks.
• Siren: Blood Curse & Resident Evil 5, Warhawk
o Content for all of these have arrived here and are being prepared for SCEE's audience now. We will bring you more information on these as it becomes available.
• Game Launching
o Many titles are preparing support for Game Launching but this often requires a patch to their title. It is not our intention to be announcing new releases and patches to other titles here in the Home community but hope to bring you news in the coming weeks.
• Music within Home
o Playing your own music to others within Home is an extremely complex licensing issue that will take time to solve, if it is at all possible.
o In the meantime we are investigating various ways of allowing you to play your own music to yourself. We are also talking to other 3rd parties about making their music available to you in various ways.
I think that unlocking stuff for winning online matches is a pretty cool idea. I wonder what stuff you win? I mean, are these items that you just show off around your house? That's pretty cool. I know the outfits that are coming are based off of Ryu, Ken, Guile and Chun-Li. Pretty much the only characters they had to have. I also know that there are Street Fighter actions you can buy for your character to perform. That seems like a good idea and has me vaguely interested. Especially considering I play SF IV online just about every day.

It's also cool that they have so many spaces coming out for high profile games such as RE 5. I wonder if you can unlock stuff for your house in RE 5 by beating the game or playing a lot of online or something? Really, if they went with that…HOME would start reminding me of the VIP room from NFL 2K fame. This is only a good thing and something I endorse.

The music issue will probably be an impossible one to work out. As cool as it would be to blast your favorite songs to your buddy's avatar, the music industry seems to be fairly stingy about that. What may happen is that HOME will broker a deal with certain artists and will allow you to purchase songs that you can play to others. Buying songs again may seem like a rotten deal, but it's the only way I can see something like that going down. Being able to play music to yourself seems like a given though. I totally expect that to happen.

As for anything else, I can't really comment because I haven't really gotten the HOME experience. That said, if you enjoy HOME let me know if this update news excites ya' at all. Thank you.



Weekly PSN Update

Well, the past couple of weeks have been pretty ho-hum for the PSN store. Can this one turn things around? MAYBE. Let's see…

Downloadable Games
• No Gravity: The Plague of Mind for PSP (US$ 9.99)
Digital Guides
• Killzone 2 Strategy Videos (US$ 5.99)
Add-on Game Content
• BUZZ! Quiz of the Year 2008 (US$ 5.99)
• Disgaea 3: Demon & Detective Set (US$ 3.99)
o adds new custom characters Kogure and Marjoly, and a Kogure custom theme.
• Disgaea 3: Kogure (US$ 1.99)
o adds a new custom character called Kogure.
• Disgaea 3: Marjoly (US$ 1.99)
o adds a new custom character called Marjoly.
• Street Fighter IV's Femme Fatale Pack (US$ 3.99)
o alternate costumes Cammy, Chun-Li, Crimson Viper, Rose, and Sakura
• Skate 2 San Van Classic Pack (US$ 4.99)
o revamped Community Center, Elementary School and Parkade locations from the original
• The Lord of the Rings: Conquest Content Pack #2 (US$ 9.99)
• Rock Band
o Lucky Denver Mint - Jimmy Eat World (US$ 1.99)
o Futures - Jimmy Eat World (US$ 1.99)
o Sweetness - Jimmy Eat World (US$ 1.99)
 Jimmy Eat World Pack 01 (US$ 5.49) - Build your Rock Band library by purchasing this song game track pack: Jimmy Eat World Pack 01. This pack includes: Futures, Lucky Denver Mint, and Sweetness by Jimmy Eat World.
o 3 Dimes Down - Drive-By Truckers (US$ 1.99)
o Time Bomb (Live) - Old 97's (US$ 1.99)
o Satellite Radio - Steve Earle (US$ 1.99)
o People Got a Lotta Nerve - Neko Case (US$ 1.99)
o Can't Let Go - Lucinda Williams (US$ 1.99)
 Alt Country Pack 01 (US$ 8.49) - Build your Rock Band library by purchasing this song game track pack: Alt Country Pack 01. This pack includes: 3 Dimes Down by Drive-By Truckers, Can't Let Go by Lucinda Williams, People Got a Lotta Nerve by Neko Case, Satellite Radio by Steve Earle, and Time Bomb (Live) by Old 97's.
• Guitar Hero World Tour
o Get Out of Denver by Bob Seger (US$ 1.99)
o Her Strut by Bob Seger & the Silver Bullet Band (US$ 1.99)
o Old Time Rock & Roll by Bob Seger & the Silver Bullet Band (US$ 1.99)
 Bob Seger Track Pack (US$ 5.49) - Downloadable Track Pack for Guitar Hero World Tour featuring Old Time Rock & Roll and Her Strut by Bob Seger & the Silver Bullet Band, and Get Out of Denver by Bob Seger.
Game Demos (free)
• Killzone 2 Demo
• Major League Baseball 2K9 demo
• Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X Demo
Game Videos (free)
• PULSE 2/26 Edition (free)
• Metal Gear Online SCENE Trailer
Blu-ray Trailers (free)
• Lakeview Terrace Trailer
• Rachel Getting Married Trailer
• Cadillac Records Trailer
PS3 Themes
• Disgaea 3: Absence of Justice Kogure Custom Theme (US$ 0.99)
• St. Patrick's Day Theme (US$ 1.49)
• Irish Girls Theme (US$ 1.49)
• Bald Eagles Theme (US$ 1.49)

PLAYSTATION STORE FOR PSP

Downloadable Games
• No Gravity: The Plague of Mind (US$ 9.99) (also available from PS3 storefront)
Add-on Game Content
• Prinny: Can I Really be the Hero? - Flonne's Castle (US$ 3.99)
o adds a new stage and a boss character called Flonne.
Game Videos (free)
• PULSE 2/26 Edition (also available from PS3 storefront)
PSP Themes
• Irish Girls Theme (also available from PS3 storefront) (US$ 1.49)
• Dancing Skies Theme (also available from PS3 storefront) (US$ 1.49)
• High Voltage Theme (also available from PS3 storefront) (US$ 1.49)
• Seaside Sunsets Theme (also available from PS3 storefront) (US$ 1.49)
• Nordic Majesty Theme (also available from PS3 storefront) (US$ 1.49)
• Polar Bears Theme (also available from PS3 storefront) (US$ 1.49)


Well for starters, I am pleased as punch to see the PSP finally get another downloadable game on their store. It feels like months since the last one was released and who knows, it very well could have been months. No Gravity is a flight simulator game with decent enough graphics. I honestly don't know much about it but the trailers for it look fairly generic. Still though, for a nine dollar asking price it probably isn't a bad deal and may be worth your download.

On the Killzone 2 front I am very pleased that a demo is available for my precious download. Even though it looks like a very good game, the fact remains that Killzone 2 is a shooter and generally speaking I am not a shooter guy. I really need a demo to see if Killzone 2 will be for me. I hope it is though and why should I think otherwise? Most everyone I know who has played the game says it is awesome and even Microsoft complimented Sony on the game. Nice. The Strategy video is probably a bit much since you can just use GameFAQs or something to learn how to beat the game, but this is something they should try more of. I'd be more apt to watch a strategy video on my PS3 than a game trailer.

The DLC this week is pretty ho-hum as can be expected. I love the Buzz Trivia addition. I figure talking about the year that we all just suffered through could be a very fun experience. So big ups for that. I think the price tag seems about fair as well. The Disgaea DLC though, once again, is stupid and over-priced. I am waiting for the day that they decide to release some additional content DLC instead of just giving us new characters to play with all the time. If they gave us a new chapter to tool around with…I think I'd really like that. Especially comparing Disgaea 3 to the other Disgaeas, there are fewer chapters.

The Street Fighter DLC is another costume pack but a tempting one this time. I've seen the costumes for the female fighters and am much more impressed with this group than what came with the complimentary brawler pack. The ones for Chun-Li, Cammy and Rose in particular strike me as pretty good. Obviously I'm not going to endorse something like this since it should have just been thrown on the disc, but…if you were to get it, I may not totally scrutinize you. Yes, I'm a hypocrite.

Well, the Rock Band DLC this week strikes me as the clear winner of the rhythm DLC this time. I love Jimmy Eat World and have been craving some songs of theirs to be in Rock Band. So, it's nice to have three to sort my way through. I'm not really a fan of the country track pack they released, but three songs I approve of is more than usual. On the other hand, we have Guitar Hero DLC which…you know, it's not good. Sorry guys, not a huge fan of Bob Seger. Better luck next time huh?

I already touched on the Killzone demo, so let's talk about the other demo listed there that appeals to my interests: MLB 2K9. To say that I am down on the 2K franchise is a horrible understatement. I think ever since EA has lost the right to do baseball games, 2K studios has driven the fantastic 2K series into the ground. That's saying quite a lot because there was a time when I felt that MLB 2K5 was almost as good as the amazing MVP 2005. The demo will let me know whether this game will be worth checking out or skipping over for the likely superior "MLB: The Show". By the way, have you seen the commercial for that game? I'm ashamed to admit it, but it makes me kind of respect Dustin Pedroia. Oh God, I feel dirty.

I would like to comment more on the Prinny game's DLC, but I haven't even gotten a chance to play the actual game.

The rest of the content is fairly ho-hum. Each store has a few videos you can just youtube or something up there. They also have themes available, but this week – unlike most – features only premium themes which doesn't exactly tickle my fancy. You know, for a game I love so much in Disgaea 3, why do they throw so many things my way that just piss me off endlessly? Damn you Atlus.

I would say that it was a mediocre week but at least it's not as bad as last week, so I will have a thumb sideways but slightly tilted towards the up-direction this time around. I know you so desperately want to please me Sony, but I'm just too much of a man for you.



B3yond the Tabloids

I have won something like 90 games on Street Fighter IV online. I'm very close to my 100th victory and I am excited as all can be! What has me surprised though is that my win percentage is sneaking close to 70% which is much, much, much better than what I would have thought coming into this game, especially considering the fiasco that was Turbo HD Remix online. To this point, the only player that regularly causes me grief is Blanka players. They endlessly piss me off. There's just something about them. On the other hand, I've never lost a single round to a Sakura player. I wonder why that is? I've also fought at least three different ones who insist on having 5-round (3 wins required) matches. It's weird. My brother does particularly well against Ryu players it should be noted.

Speaking of Street Fighter, the new movie was released and it is deliciously awful. I honestly laughed the whole way through it. So, in that regard, I loved it. Not everyone likes to see bad movies though as it only grossed $4.65 million in the box office on opening weekend which is LESS than The House of the Dead, Alone in the Dark and Name of the King all grossed in their opening weekend. That's right, it was beaten by UWE movies! Baaah. You should go see it though, for reals. It's hilarious and needs a sequel.

There was a rumor going around this week that the Playstation 3 hard drive had been decrypted which would have allowed for some relatively easy piracy and console editing but it turns out that this wasn't the case. Hackers are working on it though and they even have an instructional video teaching you how to get as far as they got with the PS3's hard drive. Given that I'm not supposed to support such actions, I won't link it buuuut if you wanted to youtube it, I can't exactly stop you.

The entire Sony brand is going through relatively rough times thanks to the current recession but president Howard Stringer looks to come out of this thing strong. His current plan is to take all Sony products and have them be able to access the Playstation Network. This is actually pretty cool news. This may mean that there will be an even larger focus on the store which is only a plus.

This is some news you might actually find interesting. Tyrone Robinson, a British Olympic hopeful, has included Street Fighter IV into his workout routine in order to improve his mental abilities and speed up his reflexes. Robinson, a bronze medal winner in a recent European Taekwando tournament, has this to say on the issue:
I'm never going to be able to throw fireballs in the ring like the characters in Street Fighter IV, but I can still try some of the crazy kicks they do. It's a good way to relax at the end of a hard day's training and great to have a tournament with friends.

Believe it or not, Taekwando experts actually SUPPORT this kind of training because they say it improves hand-eye coordination and dramatically improves results in the field. Obviously, Street Fighter isn't the only game this applies to but this is really cool. Someone should tell Jack Thompson about this, eh? For the record, I assume that Mr. Stringer will now be leading all of his fights with a high jump kick followed immediately by either a sweep of the legs or an uppercut that has him leaping into the air.

Here's a bit of interesting news: using Yellow Dog Linux on the Playstation 3, a hacker was able to get Starcraft up and running on the machine. Since Linux takes up so much of the Cell Processor, don't expect to be able to run anything more complex than that on your console, but it's still pretty cool that it can be done. Again, there is a youtube video of this up but obviously I can't link to it. It's still pretty cool though.

This may not be a useful tip since the patch is already out, but Guerilla Games has already patched Killzone 2 to prevent users from creating games with bots in them. They noticed that players were playing games with just bots in order to increase their experience points, which is, you know, a no-no. Now you have to face humanity in order to get those precious experience points. Poor you eh?

I'm probably the only one reading this who really cared but the PS3 title X-Edge (pronounced Cross Edge) has been delayed a couple of months in order to implement trophies. This game is sort of a jumbled up RPG cross over between several companies. Yes, you can have both Etna and Morrigan in the game. Yes, that is damn cool. The new release date is May 19th, 2009 and will almost assuredly be published by Atlus. Yes, I will be going on and on about this game upon its release.

Apparently if you buy a Playstation 3 on March 3rd, that would be the day that this little column goes up on the internet, you get a $50 gift card at gamestop. So, like, you're getting fifty of your dollars back you can use to buy a game or another dualshock or something. Pretty convenient little thing then, wouldn't ya say? Pretty sure the deal only applies to THAT day, so make sure to hop on it.

So, were you looking forward to hopping around the new Prince of Persia content tomorrow? Well, in thinking that it was about here you were WRONG. WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG. It comes out next week. A week delay seems silly to me but whatever.

Shaun Himmerick, Executive Producer of the Upcoming game Wheelman, had some interesting comments about the PS3 and 360. Here they are if you want to see ‘em:
The politically incorrect answer is that the PS3 is a huge pain in the ass. Anyone making a game, if you're going to make it for both [360 and PS3], just lead on the PS3 because if it works on the PS3 it'll work on 360.

The easiest way to look at it is, the 360 has one big chunk of memory, but the PS3 has two chunks of memory that in total are the same size as the Xbox, but because they're split you can't share memory the same way. That will bite you in the ass, and it bit us in the ass bad.

We had to play catch up on the PS3 because of the memory constraints and how it renders, how it processes is just different. And it's harder on the PS3. The Xbox is just like a dumb PC, which is great because it's easier to build a game on a PC.

Basically, nothing we didn't already know.



B3yond the Cinema



Resident Evil 5 is ALMOST here so is it any surprise that I come with a trailer? It shouldn't be.



A White Knight Chronicles TV Spot.



The King of Fighters XII. Fuck yes. Could we have a new weekly dose?



Here's a full inning of MLB 09 the Show. It's Cubs/Cardinals so you know I had to post it.



Guitar Hero Metallica. Hey, I had to have five.

The One Man Water Cooler



This week on the 10th Hour I wrote about the top-10 worst video game movies. It wasn't really my best work, but throughout the list there were movies I slotted there that are bad but I had a soft spot for. Yes, The Wizard is one of those. A lot of people are defending it, heh. You will also notice another movie slotted firmly on this list, it's one near and dear to my heart and happened to receive a sequel very recently. Yes, the Street Fighter movie.

On Friday I wanted to storm the theaters and relive everything that we love about video game movies. They're bad, they're poorly written and in the end they're just an excuse to make a quick dollar. I knew all of these things going in and I wanted to embrace it. A part of me was hoping that maybe the new Street Fighter movie would capture the magic the old one did. You remember that one, don't you? The American Badass Guile being played by Captain Austrian Jean Claude Van Damme. Who could forget Zangief's classic line: "CHYANGE DA CHYANNEL." Awesome.

So with a group of dedicated movie goers and my Ryu headband in tact – no I did not actually wear it, just kind of held it – I prepared to go see a movie I was confident would be terrible. To say that I was not disappointed would be an understatement. Through the events of the new Street Fighter movie I pretty much couldn't stop laughing from the beginning. When they un-veiled the ruthless M. Bison as nothing more than a Businessman with an Irish accent I couldn't hold it back anymore. I knew this was going to be an awesome movie.

First, I implore you to find footage of Chris Klein as he appeared in the movie. You know, of American Pie fame? Every scene this guy is in is pure gold. He does such a bad acting job, he's so over-the-top…it's down right comical. Honestly, I was convinced that Street Fighter had become a comedy movie half-way through. From his over-the-top proclamation: "CHARLIE NASH, INTERPOL" to his demanding everyone get out because there's a bomb in the building, he does an amazing job that will probably have you on the floors.

Actually, Klein's acting job probably isn't the worst. See, Klein was so bad that he was humorous but there was a job that was so bad that it was just, well, bad. Gen, the borderline decrepit (in the games) teacher of Chun-Li, is played by Robin Shou. When I first saw him, I could never have guessed that he was the Elderly Gen. He looked like he was barely forty! The casting, I wish, was the worst problem. Gen delivers most of his lines in pure monotone style, very rarely showing any emotion. Every scene with Gen detracts from the quality of the movie exponentially.

Gen in the movie leads the previously unheard of "Order of the Web". The group was formed in order to combat the Bison-led Shadaloo (Annoying pronounced Shadolao throughout the movie). Here's the thing about this order though: you see three total Order of the Web members in the film. You have Gen, the leader, who is always getting his shit kicked in and miraculously survives. You have a random black guy who gets beat up on a subway and you also have another random guy who gets his ass beat by random thugs. So really, the Order of the Web is only good at getting the shit kicked out of them. Am I to believe that this group is supposed to stand up to Shadaloo? What are they going to do, beat them in an ass-kicked contest?

Really, as far as acting goes, there were only two good jobs done throughout the movie. You had the actress who played Chun-Li, Kristin Kreuk, who had to have been told that she was in an A-caliber movie because she gave a very convincing performance with some very average dialogue. I don't know if she was being black-mailed or something, but she was much too good of an actress to appear in this film. For that reason alone, aside from a line at the end of the film, Chun-Li is the least entertaining character. I come to these movies for the BAD acting, dammit!

The other quality performance was John Coffee himself, Michael Clarke Duncan. Unlike Chun-Li it appears that Duncan, who played Balrog, knew what kind of movie this was and cheesed it up the whole damn time. He has a comical delivery throughout the majority of the movie and he wound up being my second favorite character of all, behind of course Charlie Nash. My favorite Balrog line is when he's in a room with two random thugs and a tied up Chun-Li and he says in a semi-teasing way: "You ready ta' get dis' ova' wid?" Oh God, it was awesome. Hinted Chun-Li rape = humor I guess. While the other actors tried their best, I think only Duncan knew that this movie just was going to be a total dud.

Even with all of its problems, the Street Fighter movie technically follows bits of the Alpha canon. Rose's unique backstory is left pretty intact except for the fact that in the game she wants to kill Bison and in the movie she, er, loves her PAPA. They also keep Shadaloo's members to Bison, Balrog and Vega. You see, at this point, I'm pretty sure Sagat was not part of the group. As much as I wanted to see him in the movie, I don't think he joined until after Alpha. Unfortunately, because it tried to follow Chun-Li's path through Alpha (kinda, I mean, obviously it wasn't perfect), there were some characters left out. These would include Ryu, Ken, Guile, Zangief, E. Honda and…DAN!  I was kind of hoping they would show a random guy getting beat up and call him Dan but whatever.

Now you know how I said that Ryu wasn't in the movie? The movie decides to blatantly troll the audience later on with a line promoting the upcoming world tournament and Gen saying: "I HEAR THERE'S THIS FIGHTER FROM JAPAN, RAI-YU (they mispronounce his name, I mean, come on) AND HE'S PRETTY GOOD. WE CAN RECRUIT HIM." I mean, it's one thing not to have the most popular character in the series in your movie, but it's another thing entirely just to go: "Haha! He's not in this movie!"

Yes, you read that right by the way. They hint at a sequel as the movie ends. As if the guys making the movie can't tell that the production has been a total train wreck. "No, no, the acting may have been terrible and the script may have been bad but dammit, the American public wants another one." I really hope that the movie gets made though, I want to see what they would do with the Street Fighter tournament. It could be even worse than what they did with a spliced up Alpha storyline. It would be pretty damn awesome.

From weird casting decisions to poor dialogue to even worse acting, the new Street Fighter movie is a total train wreck. If you're a diehard fan of the game you will absolutely hate it…and that's what makes it so good. It's everything that's wrong with videogame cinema and I love it for that. So, I recommend you go out and see this movie right away. It is the most I've enjoyed myself in a movie theater in the longest time. If you miss out on it? Well, sorry Charlie.



B3yond the Mail

This week I'm running short on time so I have to cut out the mail section this time. I apologize in advance. Next time I'll definitely get to your comments though. To those guys who gave me their PSN IDs, I will add you sometime later tonight. I need more people to throw down with after all. I am just really slow about adding people and what not. I suck.

So, if you want to comment feel free to do so below or simply send me an e-mail at [e-mail]. I promise next week I will get to them, it's just running late today and I wanted to submit the column in time. Thank you for understanding. You can harass me over PSN if you would like. My ID is Croix22. You can fight me in SF IV too, if you wish. I'm decent this time I guess.

Again, sorry about no responding to feedback. I promise it'll be back next week.

The 411mania Empire



Joe Roche writes the Full-Circle 360 News Report.

Theo Fraser writes the Nintendophiles

Chris Vicari writes the PC-Spotlight

I write the 10th Hour

Drew writes Three-Player Co-Op

Tommy Coloma writes The Release List

AJ and Mike Minotti host the Exploding Barrel Podcast

Well, that's it. I'm out.

'til the crossroads