Smash TV (Xbox Live Arcade) Review
Posted by Steve McHugh on 04.17.2007
Classic carnage...
I have friends who had never heard of this game. I won’t name them and add to the already huge embarrassment they must be feeling by my looks of wonder at their statement. It’s the same look you give people when they haven’t seen Blade Runner or Die Hard. It’s the look of ‘why what’s wrong?’
I would have figured everyone in the known world would have played Smash TV by now. It was released back in 1990 in the arcade and then subsequently ported to pretty much every single console that happened to be around at the time with varying degrees of success. This version however, is an arcade-perfect conversion which at least means you get the best control system for this type of game. One stick moves you and the other shoots in the direction you point to. Simple and efficient. It’s the same system used in countless other games like Geo Wars and Assault Heroes and it works just as well here.
Every boss fight is something special.
Simple is also the word used to describe the game as a whole. The point is that you are on a game show and to win you have to go through various rooms in a level killing everything that comes out at you. And that is basically it. Yeah you have to pick up power ups and try to get a high score but really it’s all about killing everything that comes into the room. You clear one room and immediately move onto the next before you get to fight each levels boss.
The boss fights are pretty cool with some very nice creatures making up these difficult sections. The graphics in general also look pretty good as everything is bright and colorful and the animation is still pretty fluid. There’s even a liberal splatter of gore as you go up against human opponents and although it certainly does look its age it’s still all firmly tongue-in-cheek and shows that it’s still got enough spark where it matters.
The music on the other hand hasn’t aged as well and whilst it’s certainly nothing horrible it’s also nothing you’re going to want to hear again and again, which really won’t be much of a problem.
You see, like all old arcade games the whole point was to kill you off quickly so you’d put in more money. Well the game is still just as hard as ever (in fact unfairly so) but now you have unlimited continues so you’ll fly through the game in a matter of a few hours and that’s it. You can switch them off, and you need to if you want to get onto the leaderboards, but even then it won't last you long. There’s a nice 2 player split screen and online play but neither of these will hold your attention for long once they’ve been completed.
The achievements don’t help matters as they range from the generic (kill a boss) to the utterly bizarre or in some cases impossible (beat the game without losing a continue) and after getting the initial few achievements you’re unlikely to want to go back. There’s also online leader boards, if you’re that way inclined.
The 411
Well this is a classic game that really has aged quite well. It's not perfect as its too easy to die and unlimited continues make it very easy to finish as it's not a very long game. Also the achievements are mostly pointless, which is a shame. It might be over shadowed by better games on XBLA but this is still a lot of fun and worthy of a download.
Graphics
7.1
Aged reasonably well and still very tongue-in-cheek.
Gameplay
8.0
Simple and straightforward although it is a very tough game.
Sound
6.4
Perfectly acceptable but not something you’ll want to hear again and again.
Lasting Appeal
6.0
Multiplayer and split screen will last longer than the single player but that’s not saying much.
Fun Factor
8.2
This is a lot of fun to play despite the difficulty of it and it’s even more fun with a friend.
