411 Movies Roundtable: April 2009
Posted by Owain J. Brimfield on 04.02.2009
The 411 staff takes a look back at the month that was, and discusses the upcoming big releases in April!
Welcome to the monthly 411 Movies Roundtable. After a few tentatively sizeable forays this year, April sees a few larger films peeking their heads over the horizon in an attempt to get noticed before blockbuster season is truly upon us. This month, Jason Statham returns from the dead, Russell Crowe returns to form and Vin Diesel returns to the role that, arguably, made him famous, so it looks like we've got a lot to look forward to.
This month's picture theme takes its cue, as if you couldn't tell, from a certain small-screen anime making the transition towards the big screen and, judging by our comments later, surefire flop-dom. I just grabbed the images from Google, so if anyone can explain to me why half the Dragonball character looks the same, please do.
Let's get down to business...
Introducing this month's participants:
Furiouser and furiouser, Arnold Furious!
Master of the alternate take Shawn S. Lealos!
Five and one, 51, Steve Gustafson!
A casting call for Jason Chamberlain!
Regular reader riler Bryan Kristopowitz!
Jack of all trades Jeremy Thomas!
...and I'm your host, Owain J. Brimfield!
The Month That Was
Arnold Furious
Biggest Winner of the Month: DreamWorks. It's early going on the weekend but estimates place Monsters Vs Aliens with a whopping $58M opening weekend, which is better than Watchmen. And because it's a film that appeals to a broader audience it's almost certain to have less dramatic drop-offs in the coming weeks.
Biggest Loser of the Month: WWE Films. Every picture they release seems to have these huge gaping flaws that they can't even see. Any fool knows that Renny Harlin isn't exactly a go-to guy in terms of saving your company. Ask Carolco. And yet there he is helming another WWE failure. This one opened in 7th place below The Rock's latest movie on its third weekend. I'm not saying WWE Films don't know what they're doing but I've seen little evidence that their films have a big enough market to get cinematic releases. Another release, another bomb.
Biggest Movie News of the Month: Sam Raimi telling Marvel, in no uncertain terms, that he'll only do Spider-Man 4 if he gets to call the shots. In other words; don't force any characters into his continuity that he doesn't want. Venom's failure in Spider-Man 3 was down to two things. 1. The rushed nature of his inclusion and 2. That Sam Raimi hates Venom and didn't want him in the film. Just let him make the movies his way. He was doing fine before the interruptions.
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month:Observe and Report. The trailer cracked me up and I'm fond of everyone involved in the picture from Rogen to Liotta. That and there is precious little else to get excited about this month.
Recommended DVD Release of the Month: The 4th season of American Dad is out on 20th April. Otherwise it's a quiet month.
Classic Movie of the Month: I'm going with Friday because I literally just finished watching it. Remember when Chris Tucker and Ice Cube weren't both doing terrible movies? Hey, Tucker isn't even THAT irritating in Friday. "You got knocked the fuck out!" and "I got mind control over Deebo. He be like "shut the fuck up." I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talking again". True, it is a film about nothing but so are many of the greats.
Movie Quote of the Month: "None of you understand. I'm not locked up in here with you. You're locked up in here with me." – Jackie Earle Haley's Rorschach plays nice with his new cellmates in Watchmen.
Shawn S. Lealos
Biggest Winner of the Month: Was there anyone who was a winner in the month of March? I think I can go with Coraline. I made a joke about how if you wanted to see a good 3D movie, you needed to catch Coraline before The Jonas Brothers knocked it out of theaters. Well, Coraline made a triumphant return to 3D theaters once the Jonas Brothers flopped and made a short lived return to the Top 10. The movie going public has good taste once in awhile.
Biggest Loser of the Month: The Rock. He has all but abandoned his action movies for family fare because that is where the audiences awaited him. How disappointing is it that his latest BIG BUDGET family adventure, Race to Witch Mountain, flopped. It had a decent first week with $24 million but took a 50% drop in week 2 and only hit $5 million in week 3. I don't see it hitting $100 million unless the poor April movie slate helps it. That can't be something Disney is happy with. In comparison, Monsters vs. Aliens made more in its opening weekend than Race to Witch Mountain made in its first three weeks.
Biggest Movie News of the Month: I am up and down about the news of Kevin Smith directing A Couple of Dicks. The fact that Smith is directing a studio picture co-starring Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan is very, very cool. However, while I love Kevin Smith, it is not his directing that I get excited about. Kevin Smith's writing is what is best about his work. I am afraid this movie is going to go to someone else before all is said and done because, as he has proven over time, Smith is not overly confident in his abilities. I want him to do it, I want him to write in some of his dialogue for these guys, and I would see it opening weekend. If it happens.
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month: After a great (for me) month of theatrical releases, April is a wasteland. There are few movies I give a damn about - I am probably most excited about Adventureland.
Recommended DVD Release of the Month:The Wrestler. April 21. Enough said.
Classic Movie of the Month: More James Bond Blu-Rays are being released, so I'll throw out the greatest classic James Bond movie there is - Goldfinger. It came out last month. If you have Blu-Ray, go buy it.
Movie Quote of the Month: "Man has climbed Mount Everest, gone to the bottom of the ocean. He's fired rockets at the Moon, split the atom, achieved miracles in every field of human endeavor... except crime!" - Goldfinger
Steve Gustafson
Biggest Winner of the Month: Let's tug some heart strings. I'm going with Kirk Douglas. Mr. Douglas completed a remarkable four-night, one-man play, Before I Forget that was labeled both brave and entertaining. How cool was it that it took place at the Kirk Douglas Theatre? The 92 year old legend reflected on his achievements (movie star of 87 films, author of nine books, the recipient of a panoply of awards and philanthropic milestones, to name a few!) and struggles with gaining his father's approval and obstacles in showing that same approval towards his four sons. The feedback was overwhelmingly positive and it was good to see him progressing well after his stroke. The crowning achievement was his son Michael presenting him an ice cream cone after his last performance as a symbol of approval, drawing tears from Kirk and the crowd. I salute you, Kirk Douglas!
Biggest Loser of the Month:Watchmen is the easy answer. Sure it will make its money back in DVD sales and rentals, but the stigma of flop surrounds it. Plus, it puts in jeopardy other comic properties that don't have mass appeal name recognition attached to them. Get ready for more Spider-Man, more Batman, and more Hancock!
Biggest Movie News of the Month: I'm going obscure this month. For the second month this gets a mention; and if my sources are right, this is starting to become a problem. The box-office prognosticators were wrong again in the month of March, calling into question how they calculate and predict the box office receipts for the weekend. For the past two months critics and box office pundits have miscalculated the totals for both the winners and losers. Example: The box-office gurus were correct in that the Nicolas Cage's Knowing had the inside track to being the number one movie. But its estimated $24.8-million haul turned out to be not only far higher than expected but an especially painful dose of reality to movie critics who had lambasted the movie, and nearly all of them did, and had gone on to predict that it would become a box-office dud. The age of relevance for critics and box office predictors is in jeopardy!
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month:Tyson. I remember the day when the name Tyson inspired fear, awe, and a KO. Now he's a punch line. He's lived a life that is worthy of a movie and I'm really looking forward to this one.
Recommended DVD Release of the Month: Hey look! The Spirit is coming out! Maybe I should buy it so I can be reminded how awfully bad it is! Or maybe not. Who am I kidding, I'll buy it. But my pick is for the DVD release of Caprica the pilot of the Battlestar Galactica prequel premieres on DVD and digital download on April 21 to help curb the withdrawals we are currently going through. Eric Stoltz rules!
Classic Movie of the Month:Good Night and Good Luck - an Academy Award-nominated 2005 film directed by George Clooney and written by Clooney and Grant Heslov that portrays the conflict between radio and television journalist Edward R. Murrow and U.S. Senator Joseph McCarthy, relating to the anti-Communist Senator's actions with the Senate Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations. A hugely underrated film that never gets the praise it deserves.
Movie Quote of the Month: "Who is Keyser Soze? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that, poof. He's gone." -
Verbal (Kevin Spacey) in The Usual Suspects
Jason Chamberlain
Biggest Winner of the Month: After the awesomeness of Kung Fu Panda, Dreamworks had more success with Monsters vs. Aliens last month. I haven't seen it yet but the movie looks like a lot of fun and it's doing quite well at the box office. The movie looks great animation wise and it has a top notch voice cast, so I'm not surprised it's having success and I look forward to checking it out.
Biggest Loser of the Month: John Cena's movie career. Strike two!
Biggest Movie News of the Month: I'm kind of surprised and disappointed by Watchmen's quick fade at the box office. Obviously the property didn't have the selling power of a Spider-Man or Batman, but I'd hoped the sheer brilliance of the movie could overcome that. It still performed respectably, but it won't be termed a hit.
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month: It's looking pretty slow, but I'll go with Adventureland. I've always dug slacker comedies. Half the time I feel like I'm living in one!
Recommended DVD Release of the Month:Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy is hitting DVD and Blu-Ray this month. If you didn't catch them, these were a series of short cartoon gags on Youtube in the animation style of Family Guy and American Dad. They were admittedly hit or miss, but the good ones outweighed the bad. If you haven't seen Mario and Princess Peach engage in a domestic dispute in Bowser's Castle, you are seriously missing out. Jeff Goldblum Wafers was also pretty inspired.
Classic Movie of the Month: I'm in the middle of playing Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga so I'm going with all six of the movies! I grew up with the originals and I love the prequels. From start to finish, Star Wars is my favourite movie!
Movie Quote of the Month: "Why so serious?" – The Joker tells a haunting story in The Dark Knight.
Bryan Kristopowitz
Biggest Winner of the Month: Nicolas Cage, as his latest flick, Knowing, had a strong opening weekend, meaning that Cage can still open a movie, regardless of his waning reputation (I'm discounting the National Treasure movies here because that's a franchise and it's a little different than a movie like Knowing). And Samuel L. Jackson getting signed up for nine movies as Nick Fury is a pretty lucrative deal, so kudos to Mace Windu.
Biggest Loser of the Month: WWE Films, as its latest action flick bombed at the box office. The movie, 12 Rounds, was terrible, so WWE deserves it, but even Renny Harlin, a name director (he may not be A-list but people know who he is) couldn't help.
Biggest Movie News of the Month: Marvel Comics movie studio pushing back the release date of Thor, which then means that Avengers will likely happen a year later than expected. Maybe Avengers will never happen. Oh, and apparently "Weird Al" Yankovic is going to be in Rob Zombie's Halloween 2. That may be the only reason to look forward to Rob Zombie's Halloween 2.
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month:Crank: High Voltage is an absolute must see. Observe and Report looks good, too.
Recommended DVD Release of the Month: Both Morgan Stewart's Coming Home and the Leslie Nielsen classic Repossessed are coming out, part of something called "The Lost Collection." The Wrestler will also be out (yeah), and the fine folks at Anchor Bay are releasing a Hellraiser boxed set in the form of a puzzle box. That's just dang cool. And who else wants to see JCVD?
Classic Movie of the Month:Demolition Man (1993): It's super cop Sylvester Stallone vs. super criminal Wesley Snipes in a weird beard future where violence is outlawed and everyone lives in a kind of blissful dictatorship. Part kick butt action flick, part sci-fi extravaganza, and all done with a sly sense of humor. It's one of Stallone's best movies. Too bad it didn't gain an audience until much later. Am I the only one who would love to see a Demolition Man 2?
Movie Quote of the Month: Nick: "You've got a sense of humor, Bob. I like that in a man."
Bob: "What do you like in a woman?"
Nick: "Big tits."
Jim Belushi (Nick Pirandello, CIA) and John Ritter (Bob Wilson) - Real Men (1987)
Jeremy Thomas
Biggest Winner of the Month:Monsters vs. Aliens would be the obvious choice, but I'm going to give this to Nicolas Cage, who's Knowing broke a string of non-National Treasure-related flops at the box office. The film had absolutely remarkable legs in its second week, holding for a drop of only 40% which is very impressive considering both the genre (sci-fi tends to drop about 50%) and the fact that a major tentpole film opened in MvA. Cage is finally earning some marketability factor back, and maybe people will start forgetting about The Wicker Man finally. I won't, but maybe someone else.
Biggest Loser of the Month: The Whitest Kids U Know. Miss March proved that they are no Broken Lizard, bombing with critics, many of whom consider it a contender for the worst film of the year. In a year of Push and Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li, that's really bad. Even worse, the critics are being kind when compared to the amount of people who have been willing to pay to see it. How bad did it do? Consider that in three weeks, it's made less than 12 Rounds made opening weekend. John Cena is a more marketable star than these guys. Ouch.
Biggest Movie News of the Month: The one thing everyone was talking about was the failure of Watchmen. I think the term "failure" is a bit much, but it certainly didn't do as well as everyone though. The film will end up being quite profitable when all is said and done, especially with DVD, but it's not an enormous box office smash and as much as I consider that a shame, I have the definite consolation that we are very unlikely to see any sequels, which as much as I love the movie and the graphic novel would be a terrible idea.
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month: April's never that strong of a month, as the studios consider May the start of the summer season and push all the good stuff to there, but WOW is it a touch month. I'm actually going with Dragonball: Evolution. Why? Because it is going to be such a catastrophic disaster that you won't be able to help laughing uproariously all the way through it.
Recommended DVD Release of the Month: Now here's where the releases get good. We have Doubt, The Wrestler and Notorious, all of which should be on my buy list. The biggest one for me, and the true must-get, is Frost/Nixon, which was the best film of 2008 and I can't wait to own.
Classic Movie of the Month: In honor of Tyson, I'm going to go with a classic boxing documentary, 1996's When We Were Kings. The docu, which won the Academy Award for Best Documentary, documents the infamous "Rumble in the Jungle" of 1974 between Muhammad Ali and George Foreman. It's a must-see for any boxing fan, and even for non-boxing fans like me.
Movie Quote of the Month: "I'm young, I'm handsome, I'm fast, I'm pretty and can't possibly be beat." - Muhammad Ali, When We Were Kings
Owain J. Brimfield
Biggest Winner of the Month: Henry Selick, who after years of making pub bets against himself over who directed A Nightmare Before Christmas in order to scrape in some name recognition, has finally got a bonafide hit all to himself in the shape of Coraline, which proved a surprisingly decent hit with the audiences and even went so far as to show that 3D as a cinematic medium may not be the OTT gimmick it's always been thought. Kudos to Selick, who pulls level with Nick Park as an undisputed modern master of stop-motion animation.
Biggest Loser of the Month: The creative dur-brains behind Miss March, which is already being hailed as the worst film of the year - as Jeremy says, in a year that's already seen Street Fighter, that's no mean achievement. Any hopes these kids may have had of turning themselves into respectable figures in the teen comedy world appear to have been shot.
Biggest Movie News of the Month: Sam Raimi's insistence that Spidey 4 is made under 100% creative control. Fantastic to see a director standing up to maintain a quality of output and a consistent storyworld within a major studio franchise, which doesn't happen nearly as often as it ought to. Raimi's one of the most genuine directors working, and he along with Chris Nolan should be the go-to guys when it comes to anyone aspiring to get a franchise off the ground in the smartest way possible.
Your Most Anticipated Movie of the Month: I am hugely intrigued to see Crank: High Voltage, considering the previous film ended with The Stath's character falling from a plane and dying. The fantastic tagline "He Was Dead. But He Got Better." Pretty much sums up the film's magnificently tongue-in-cheek ethos, and Statham deserves his place at the top of this decade's pantheon of action movie stars.
Recommended DVD Release of the Month:American Dad! season four is already pre-ordered on my Amazon account, and I'll be settling in for a few quiet nights in front of that when it arrives; it's consistently underrated and may well be better than Family Guy at this point in the shows' lifetimes.
Classic Movie of the Month: Well, I was actually going to choose Goldfinger but someone else already beat me to it, so I'll go with John Woo's The Killer, a flurry of visceral eastern violence that's deservedly one of the most criticially acclaimed action films of the past twenty years.
Movie Quote of the Month: "I always leave one bullet, either for myself or for my enemy." - the philosophical side of The Killer.
Coming Attractions
APRIL 3RD
Adventureland
Studio: Miramax
Directed by: Greg Mottola
Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Kristen Stewart, Ryan Reynolds
The plot: During the summer of 1987, recent college grad James Brennan (Eisenberg) takes what he thinks is a going-nowhere job at his local amusement park, only to discover it's a perfect opportunity to prepare himself for the real world.
Furious: Didn't we do this last month or am I just getting serious déjà vu? Like, I think anyway, I said before I liked Mottola's last picture Superbad and the cast is fine by me. I'm sure we did this last month.
Lealos: Déjà vu. This trailer really made me. Jesse Eisenberg has a likeable quality about him, similar to Michael Cera, and that is a good thing. The director is fresh off Superbad and this movie bears a strong tonal resemblance to that very funny film. This looks a like a very quirky, funny and charming film.
Gustafson: Can I just reuse what I said last month? This is one of those movies where the older folks will quickly dismiss as a paint-by-numbers coming of age comedy set in a camp setting. But even though this won't even come in the same stratosphere as Wet Hot American Summer, this might be a decent view for those young-ins looking for their first taste. I'll be there. Maybe not on opening night. But I'll be there.
Chamberlain: Now this looks cool. Reynolds is always good for some laughs, and the whole premise of a slacker working at an amusement park for the summer has plenty of potential for fun.
Kristopowitz: When I first saw the preview for this movie I said to myself, "Jesus Christ that looks stupid." I really don't know why I said that (I think I was hating the 1980's at the time). Future previews and commercials, though, make me want to take a chance with it. It's got a good cast, good people behind it, so I'm sure it will, at least, be funny.
Thomas: You know what? This may not be everyone's cup of tea, but I think the trailer is pretty funny. I like Ryan Reynolds and Jesse Eisenberg has always impressed me in his few character roles I've seen him in. Kristen Stewart seems to be displaying more personality then she did in Twilight and the situations seem pretty funny. Greg Mottola previously did Superbad which surprised me with how funny it was, and I think this could easily do the same.
Brimfield: This could run the risk of being a little clichéd, but it looks great to me and should match the quality of Superbad, in which case we're in for a treat.
Fast & Furious
Studio: Universal
Directed by: Justin Lin
Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster
The plot: The feud between ex-con Dominic Toretto (Diesel) and agent Brian O'Connor (Walker) is reignited back in Los Angeles, where a crime has pitted the two men against one another yet again. However, when they realize they have a common enemy, they put their past behind them and unite to stick it to their foe.
Furious: Because Paul Walker needs to get paid, yo! I look forward to his future movies; Fast ‘n' Furious, Fastest & Furiousest and Into the Blue II: Electric Boogaloo.
Lealos: The trailers for this movie kick ass. I've always been a Vin Diesel fan and his decent into mediocrity has been discouraging. He reached a pinnacle with the original The Fast and the Furious and then after XXX, bottomed out. I want the old Vin Diesel back. This might be the best chance to see him. Paul Walker has continued to grow as an actor over the last few years and this could be a great load of fun. I really hope it is.
Gustafson: I hate myself for saying this but I'm curious to see it. The first one was fun, the second was eh, and the third was abysmal due to the inability to show emotion of one Lucas Black. This will do brisk business at the box office... and most likely inspire a slew of illegal racing stories in the media... AND hopefully get Vin Diesel's career back on the right track.
Chamberlain: This is another franchise that I've just never really gotten into. Saw the first one and it was alright. Missed two and three. With the ‘original parts' coming back for this one, I doubt I've missed much. And give Vin Diesel credit, he's got that ‘event movie' feel to him, even if it that hasn't quite translated into box office gold.
Kristopowitz: I despise this franchise. Absolutely hate it. And after suffering through that last one, Tokyo Drift, I have no intention whatsoever of seeing it. I don't give a hooey if Vin Diesel is back.
Thomas: I enjoyed the first Fast and the Furious. It wasn't high art but it was fun, and I'm not even a car guy. I think this screams desperation on pretty much all the casts' parts, but really, would you turn down a paycheck like this? Justin Lin has a chance here to show that Tokyo Drift was a fluke and that he can make a good popcorn flick; he better not blow it the second time around, or he'll be in real trouble. Anyway, this looks to be more fun than the last two and I'm not quite ready to crap all over it yet.
Brimfield: Who would have ever thought Paul Walker was capable of carrying a for-film franchise? Given that his career has shown precisely zero progression since the first F&F came along, I have little hope for the quality of this one. No doubt there will be some entertainment value for petrolheads, but I can't drive and refer to cars by their colour rather than their make.
APRIL 10TH
Observe and Report
Studio: Warner Bros
Directed by: Jody Hill
Starring: Seth Rogen, Anna Faris, Ray Liotta, Michael Pena
The plot: Bi-polar mall security guard Ronnie Barnhardt (Rogen) is called into action to stop a flasher from turning shopper's paradise into his personal peep show. But when Barnhardt can't apprehend the culprit, a surly police detective (Liotta), is recruited to close the case, bringing out the worst in Ronnie's temperamental personality.
Furious: I don't really know who Jody Hill is but this looks to be another fine gross out comedy with vomit, foul language and abuse of alcohol. Kinda like The Wedding Singer…only with more use of the word "motherfucker". It comes with my seal of approval.
Lealos: This has the chance to be a great dark comedy, hopefully along the lines of The Cable Guy. I like to see Seth Rogan playing a damaged character that doesn't rely on slapstick humor to get his point across. He was fantastic in Pineapple Express and I hope he continues to grow as a comic talent in the years to come. This movie has me the most intrigued this month.
Gustafson: I read Seth Rogen's Playboy interview and this sounds like a good move for him. I saw a clip when Ray Liotta was on the Jimmy Fallon Late Show and it looked funny. Too bad Jimmy did a horrible job pimping the movie. I wonder how many of the people saw the trailer and said, "Wow, they sure rushed out Mall Cop 2!"?
Chamberlain: Yeah, Paul Blart beat this one to the box office by a bit. So what? As mall cops go, I think Seth Rogen will be funnier than Kevin James.
Kristopowitz: This looks hysterical. I'm actually more interested in Ray Liotta, though, and what he's doing in this movie. What is his character all about? Just how bad ass is he going to be as compared to Rogen's moron mall cop? Can't wait to see. However, I'm not looking forward to the inevitable comparisons between this movie and the Kevin James mall cop movie Paul Blart: Mall Cop Can we all please keep that to a bare minimum? And if this and Adventureland tank at the box office, will we then be subjected to articles about the overexposure of stories about slacker douchebags "growing up"?
Thomas: This is supposedly much darker of a comedy than it seems by the marketing, and I'm okay with that. I haven't hit Seth Rogan burnout quiet yet, and this looks to be better than Paul Blart was. Ray Liotta is always fun times when he's doing in In The Name of the King and I consider Anna Faris underrated as a comic actress, so I have hopes here.
Brimfield: A very intriguing cast in this one, but Seth Rogen has just about run his course as far as I'm concerned, appearing in around a dozen average-to-major releases in the last three years and playing some tiny variant of the same character in each one. Hopefully he can loosen the shackles here as it does look like a pretty fun flick.
Dragonball: Evolution
Studio: 20th Century Fox
Directed by: James Wong
Starring: Justin Chatwin, James Marsters, Chow Yun-Fat, Emmy Rossum
The plot: Upon discovering he was sent to Earth to carrying out a sinister plan, a humanoid alien named Goku (Chatwin) looks to fulfill his dying grandfather's wish: Prevent the evil Piccolo (Marsters) and his alien forces from collecting seven mystical artifacts which would allow him to take over our planet. In order to fend off the attackers, Goku must find Master Roshi (Chow), who is the one person who can set him on the right path.
Furious: What, really? I guess it must have a market. Early reviews have it tagged as "puerile" but I guess that's the market they were aiming for. The PG rating should allow plenty of kids in but let's face it, you have to be a fan beforehand.
Lealos: You've got to be kidding me. From the looks of the trailer, this movie will be for all the tweeners who love the series. I don't see non-fans, or even adult fans, thinking this movie is going to amount to anything.
Gustafson: Mmmm...Smells flop-tastic. Maybe I'm opening up a can or worms, but is this still popular? And how many years will it be before it's remade?
Chamberlain: I have never been into the Dragonball franchise, but a movie based on it could be cool, or at least worth a look. I'm interested in this mainly for James Marsters, Spike himself, getting a big role in a fairly big flick.
Kristopowitz: This movie looks terrible. The cheap looking trailer I just saw was mind bogglingly bad. Why does everything look so damn faded? The only reason to see this is to see Chow Yun-Fat, just to see if he kicks anyone's ass. Otherwise, I don't think so. I'll probably end up seeing it, though. Someone's got to see it, right? Just to see how bad it is.
Thomas: This is going to be a craptacular movie of epic proportions. Seriously people, have you SEEN this trailer? James Wong is hit or miss as a filmmaker, having given us the fun Final Destination but also the terrible Jet Li film The One. Chow Yun-Fat and James Marsters are favorites of mine and I even like Emmy Rossum, but I'm sure they can't save this waste of film. I'll be there, because occasionally I need to see a "so bad it's good" movie, but this will be completely terrible, mark my words.
Brimfield: I can't be the only one praying for a MST3K reunion as this looks exactly like their sort of fare. This will be an unmitigated flop, but could be worth a few drunken laughs and beer bottles chucked at the screen.
Case 39
Studio: Paramount
Directed by: Christian Alvart
Starring: Renee Zellweger, Ian McShane, Callum Keith Rennie
The plot: A social worker (Zellweger) fights to save a girl from her abusive parents, only to discover that the situation is more dangerous than she ever expected.
Furious: Nice to see Tideland's Jodelle Ferland get another shot in an environment where someone actually might see her performance. Shame it'll be so much more derivative than Tideland. I like Renee Zellweger though and Ian McShane so I might even check this out! Hell, I saw that movie with Renee in where she played a ghost. Can't remember what it was called.
Lealos: From Bloody Disgusting - "...it's obvious that there's no fixing Case 39, Christian Alvart's follow-up to Antibodies that has been collecting dust for over two years now. While the film was included in our 2009 preview piece with a release of April 10 planned, Paramount announced today that they have pulled the film off the 2009 radar completely." Nothing more to see here, move along...
Gustafson: I was just telling my friend that it's been too long since I've seen Zellweger's awkward pucker on the big screen, since her last movie came and went so fast. Man, they love giving her work in Hollywood, don't they? If they put her and Colin Farrell in a movie together it could very well be the first movie to do zero at the box office.
Chamberlain: Ian McShane is the man. But this sounds like a miss.
Kristopowitz: Isn't this movie like three years old? It sounds kind of interesting, though. I wonder if it will get a wide release.
Thomas: Yeah, I've heard nothing about this, and only know about it by finding the trailer for this. It looks like it's not going to be released this month (if at all), so I don't really have much to say.
Brimfield: Yeah, they shoved this one back in the closet. Sorry about that, folks.
APRIL 17TH
State of Play
Studio: Universal
Directed by: Kevin Macdonald
Starring: Russell Crowe, Ben Affleck, Rachel McAdams, Helen Mirren
The plot: Picture-perfect U.S. congressman Stephen Collins (Ben Affleck) seems to be the rising star in the world of politics -- until his research assistant, who was also his mistress, is murdered. And then the secrets start coming out...
Furious: A few heavyweights among the cast should produce something worthwhile. It's also a shot for Ben Affleck to show that he still has it. I personally thought he was outstanding in Hollywoodland a few years back but he's gone completely to pieces in front of the camera since his early breakthroughs. Note on the director; at first I thought it might be Kids in the Hall's Kevin MacDonald. It isn't. It's the Kevin MacDonald that directed Last King of Scotland and Touching the Void. Feel better about it now? Yeah, me too.
Lealos: Ben Affleck began his career rehabilitation with his eye turning role in Hollywoodland. He continued to reinvent himself with his amazing directorial debut Gone Baby Gone. He is back acting here in a film by the very interesting director of The Last King of Scotland as a congressman whose mistress is found dead. Russell Crowe also co-stars as a reporter, and old friend of the congressman, who gets swept into the mysteries that begin to unfold. It sounds great and I really want to see if it is as good as the trailers make it out to be.
Gustafson: Interesting casting, interesting plot has me...interested! The rebirth of Ben Affleck continues!
Chamberlain: Political thrillers bore the hell out of me.
Kristopowitz: This flick has a fabulous cast (even with Ben Affleck) and it looks fabulous. But I have a sinking feeling that this flick is going to have a stupid, ludicrous ending. I don't know why I have that feeling, but I do.
Thomas: This actually looks pretty good. Make fun of Ben Affleck all you want, he can deliver in the right roles and he looks like he might here. The rest of the cast is fabulous, and I love a good, tense political thriller, so I'm pretty sure I'll be there for this one. Kevin Macdonald is a fantastic director, having helmed the excellent The Last King of Scotland and I have no doubts he'll deliver here too.
Brimfield: This has potential, and it will be interesting to see how the source material has made the transition from six-hour TV serial to two-hour movie. Crowe is, by all accounts, on barnstorming form here and it looks like the remainder of the cast have some juicy roles too, so I'll be grabbing this on DVD if nothing else.
Crank: High Voltage
Studio: Lionsgate
Directed by: Mark Neveldine; Brian Taylor
Starring: Jason Statham, Amy Smart, Corey Haim, David Carradine
The plot: When we last saw Chev Chelios (Statham), it appeared as though the assassin had met his maker. Wrong. As his story continues, Chelios hunts down the mobster who stole his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working.
Furious: They should have called it Crank II: Crankier. Then I, honest to God, would have bought a ticket. High Voltage? Psssh. And Corey Haim isn't dead? I like that the Stath is continuing to make sequels to his movies because that means he gets kept away in his niche market and I don't have to watch him.
Lealos: I absolutely loved the first Crank film. It wasn't just Jason Statham, who makes some bad career choices but is generally entertaining in everything he is in. Neveldine and Taylor created a movie that was hyperkinetic and exciting, keeping me mesmerized from beginning to end. I've heard good things about their next film, Game, and saw an amazing trailer for it. I just hope their style doesn't become repetitive over time and they continue to develop as filmmakers. This is the first chance to see if they remain original and exciting and I have high expectations for this film. It could very well fail but I really want it to be good.
Gustafson: I liked Crank. It was over-the-top and kind of winked at you as it went along. I'll see this one, but I hope they don't stretch it out to the point of being a spoof on itself. Jason Statham has some acting chops and I hope he doesn't find himself typecast before too long... Too late.
Chamberlain: Never saw the first one. Somehow I've stayed off the Statham train all these years.
Kristopowitz: I can't wait to see this movie. How the heck is Jason Statham's Chev Chelios going to be brought back from the dead? The flick also has Amy Smart back (the big question: will she get naked? And how quickly) and, apparently, David Carradine. Will there be a Frankenstein showdown? Again, I can't wait.
Thomas: I know I'll take flack for this, but I'm just not buying this one. There was an "unauthorized" trailer that hit a while ago that showed more of the movie then the official trailer did, and it looked sublimely stupid. I don't mind stupid, you have to give a little bit of brain power away to enjoy these films and there's nothing wrong with that. But this is stupid on a whole new level, and that's too much for me.
Brimfield: Awesome. Crank is one of the few movies my girlfriend and I can watch and both be equally entertained, so I'm holding out hope the sequel is more of the same beyond-ridiculous action cinema.
17 Again
Studio: New Line
Directed by: Burr Steers
Starring: Zac Efron, Matthew Perry, Leslie Mann
The plot: Mike O'Donnell (Perry) has lived a life full of regrets. Suddenly, he reverts back to his 17-year-old self (Efron) who looks to navigate high school and create a path that leads to a better adult existence.
Furious: "Suddenly". He doesn't make a wish with special dust or a Zoltar machine he found at the fairgrounds? Geez, writing got lazy up in Hollywood. I've hated most Matthew Perry projects post-Friends and I doubt this will be any different.
Lealos: I assumed this was just another variation of Big, but after watching the trailer I think it is something else. It starts like It's a Wonderful Life, where instead of a character wishing he was never born, he instead wishes he could go back and do it all over. A man, who is way too similar to the guardian angel from the Christmas classic, seems to grant this wish. However, once he goes back and becomes Zac Efron, instead of recapturing his lost youth, he sets out to help his own children by becoming their friend and teaching them what is important. It sounds really obnoxious and self absorbed but it might work as a good one for the teens.
Gustafson: No matter what we say about this, how we decry this, it's still going to do well with the High School Musical set. It's hitting at the perfect time, and we might as well get out of the way and let this come on through.
Chamberlain: I pretty much stay away from everything with Zac Efron's name and/or face on it.
Kristopowitz: This movie looks terrible. The premise is kind of interesting, but the cast and the two trailers I've seen don't exactly instill confidence in me. Zac Efron is one of the most boring actors I think I've ever seen.
Thomas: Zac Efron is usually an automatic "not interested" from me, and when you add in a plot we've seen ninety gajillion times before with a vey iffy trailer, that seals the deal. Sorry, Mr. Perry and Ms. Mann, I've enjoyed some of your other work but this one will not be on my list of movies to see for the month.
Brimfield: Seriously Matthew Perry, have you not realised by now that you aren't cut out for a movie career? Stick to the small screen, away from the blighting touch of Zac Efron, who could well be a decent actor one day but right now is way too full of the HSM thing to make him even remotely bearable.
APRIL 24TH
Obsessed
Studio: Screen Gems
Directed by: Steve Shill
Starring: Beyonce Knowles, Idris Elba, Ali Larter
The plot: A successful business man (Elba) with a beautiful wife (Knowles) becomes the target of a female stalker (Larter).
Furious: Hold up, is Beyonce playing a part where her character isn't a singer? Colour me surprised. Shame she's opted for such a derivative project. The ‘successful married man attracts nutty female stalker' angle has been done to death recently. I know Fatal Attraction was a good movie but do we really need so many films to rip it off? I guess if something is successful then you get a load of knock off's. I just thought this particular sub-genre was a little crowded.
Lealos: It's Fatal Attraction, done all over again. The trailers look pretty intense but it still is way too obvious where the plot is going and I feel like I have seen it before. I do love me some Ali Larter, though.
Gustafson: Will stalker porn become the new torture porn? I don't know but I'm surprised this is getting a theatrical release. This has direct-to-DVD written all over this. Hey, whatever happened to the Bodyguard sequel Beyonce was supposed to be in?
Chamberlain: Looks like your typical ‘crazy chick' thriller.
Kristopowitz: Why would someone leave or cheat on Beyonce? I hope this movie explains that. I mean, yeah, Ali Larter is hot, but is she Beyonce hot? I don't think so. So, again, I hope this movie explains how this could happen.
Thomas: You know what? This doesn't look like it's going to be particularly good, but Ali Larter makes an excellent choice for a stalker, and I would NOT mind if she stalked me. This one won't be good, but it has potential to be fun in the low-rent Skinemax sort of way.
Brimfield: Interesting to see Elba take a lead role, if nothing else. This looks pedestrian, though.
Fighting
Studio: Rogue
Directed by: Dito Montiel
Starring: Channing Tatum, Terrence Howard, Luis Guzman
The plot: In New York City, a young counterfeiter (Tatum) is introduced to the world of underground street fighting by a seasoned scam artist (Howard), who becomes his manager on the bare-knuckling brawling circuit.
Furious: Love the title. Inspiring stuff. I am a big fan of Terry Howard. I'm still pissed off about the Iron Man franchise kicking him to the curb. Channing Tatum has had a bit of a non-descript career so far but this could be his big breakout role. Hey, even if you don't like him there's a good chance you'll get to see him punched in a face a lot. It's a win-win situation.
Lealos: Unlike my colleague Arnold Furious, it is not Terrance Howard I care about in this movie. I am a huge fan of Channing Tatum and believe he is one of today's top young stars. He is great even in chick crap like She's the Man and Step Up. This is just a small step on his ride to the top because once G.I. Joe and Public Enemies are released he's gonna be huge. I don't know about this movie, though.
Gustafson: Look at this! It's like Bloodsport had a little brother that no one cares about! I guess movies like this come around every now and then so TNT has something to show on Saturday afternoons. Luis Guzman is in it…I don't know why I just said that.
Chamberlain: There's always a market for watching people beat the crap out of each other.
Kristopowitz: Oh, man, this looks awful. Just awful. Yet another hip and edgy movie about hip and edgy rich cockbags exploiting hip and edgy poor people for hip and edgy reasons. I'd love to, instead, see a movie about a guy who kills the rich cockbags involved in underground fighting. Now that would be a great movie.
Thomas: Subtitled The Degeneration of Terrance Howard's Film Career, Part One. There are not words to describe how atrocious this looks. What's sad is I like Howard, I like Guzman, and I even think Tatum's got some potential, but this is a B-level rip-off of already-bad movies. I want an MMA film, I'll pop in Redbelt and watch it again.
Brimfield: Bryan may never again write something with which I agree more.
Tyson
Studio: Sony
Directed by: James Toback
Starring: Mike Tyson
The plot: A mixture of original interviews, archival footage, and photographs sheds light on the life experiences of Mike Tyson.
Furious: I want to see this. Mike Tyson is a genuine celebrity megastar who had everything and pissed it all away. It should be extremely interesting to get to take a look inside the mind of Iron Mike to see what makes the lunatic tick.
Lealos: I really haven't given a crap about Mike Tyson in over ten years.
Gustafson: I'm ALL for this. As long as they have the press conference where he challenges the entire press corps to a fight... I'm sold! Also, please have my favorite quote of his... well one of my favorite quotes of his, when he said, "I paid a worker at New York's zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin. When we got to the gorilla cage there was one big silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were so powerful but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let mesmash that silverback's snotbox! He declined." Yeah, I'll be seeing this.
Chamberlain: Color me completely uninterested in this one. Mike Tyson is one of those public figures that has been really, really overexposed, and his 15 minutes were over a long time ago. Sure he was once a talented boxer, but that time is past and because of his antics in and out of the ring, his legacy has very little to do with boxing and more to do with being a moron. Not the kind of person I want to watch a movie/documentary about.
Kristopowitz: A documentary about Mike Tyson? Who the hell wouldn't want to watch that? It's Mike Tyson.
Thomas: If Tyson knocks out Fighting, then April 26th will be a great day for me. This looks actually very interesting, and I think a documentary on Tyson is a great idea. Docus don't tend to do very well in the theater if they aren't extremely controversial like Fahrenheit 9/11 or Religulous, but I do enjoy them nonetheless and I think I'll enjoy this.
Brimfield: This all depends on how intriguing you find the Iron Mike phenomenon. If this doc had come out five years ago it would have been diverting, but as it is I'm not sure how much it can add to our perception of the man.
The votes are in... Observe and Report is the 411 staff's hit of the month, while Dragonball: Evolution is our shit of the month!
That's all for now, folks. Stay tuned next month as the summer season begins in earnest for a look at Terminator 4, Star Trek and a whole lot more!
