Babes, Bombs, and Blockbusters Movie News Report 9.08.09

Posted by Mike Gorman on 09.08.2009

411’s Mike Gorman discusses his Top Ten Horror Movie Icons! Plus, a glimpse into Kevin Smith’s 24 Tweet-a-thon, a summer movie recap, Stacy Dash as your Babe of the Week, and more!

Whether you're nursing a hangover from too much cheap beer or indigestion from one too many burgers (Is that possible?), you're always welcome here at the 3Bs News Report. Hollywood took a nap yesterday so we're slow on the news front but a celeb director's free time on Twitter helps pass the time. For me, the Fall means horror movie season so this seemed like a great week to look at those boogeymen who have haunted our nightmares and screens for years. So crack open a fresh sleeve of Chocolate Pop Tarts and enjoy.






If you don't recognize Stacey Dash from her beginnings on Sesame Street or her recent stint on Celebrity Circus (yes, a real show!) then you are sure to remember her as Dionne in the 90s classic film, Clueless. What is not hard to recognize is why she is your Babe of the Week.
























Clerks director Kevin Smith took questions for the whole day yesterday on his Twitter account, Twitter.com/ThatKevinSmith, and while all of his chatter was entertaining some of it was actually informative. Check out these excerpts for the dish on the rumors of his Hollywood feuds, some of his favorite TV and film moments, and his take on how his wife feels about his expanding waistline.

From @Zippio "Any chance there will be another Clerks movie??"
MAYBE when we're all in our mid-40's. CLERKS = 20's. CLERKS II = 30's.

From @EckhardSperling "What is your favorite TV-Show?"
Of all-time? Probably ROSEANNE or recent BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. Currently? Not sure.

From @500words "Long cut of JG: why's studio not releasing it?"
Still toxic, apparently. "Bennifer" fallout has half-life of thirty years.

From @theatrered "How much of your original movie script will be in "green hornet" comic?"
All of it. It's the script for the comic, too.

From @martysjr "There a beef 'tween you/the Weinsteins?"
Not at all. For 13 years, they let me make every flick I asked to. Love 'em 4 that.

From @joseph_brunetta "Your favorite Affleck performance outside of your movies?"
Wait - Affleck does OTHER movies, too? Cheating bitch... But I'd say, hands-down, GOOD WILL HUNTING is my fave non-Askew performance. Then BOILER ROOM.

From @RyanFerguson83 "dish on the Smith/Willis feud?"
There is none. Dude once literally saved me from German terrorists in L.A. one Xmas.

From @nosajdabeno "What are the chances of Red State seeing the light of day"
Looking better lately…


From @movieman97 "if Chris Nolan personally asked you to direct TDK (The Dark Knight) back in 2007 would you?"
I'd have said "Get a donkey and poo in there."

From @ADiSpirito27 "Of the movies you've made, what was the most enjoyable for you?"
As established last week to much chagrin, CLERKS II.

And in closing, a two-parter:

From @IamHatefrost "Mr. Smith why don't you excercise?"
Because I hate it. Never feels good and makes me sweat more than I already do.

&

From @IamHatefrost "Does your weight bother Jen (Kevin's wife)?"
She's said no for over 10yrs as the waistline's gotten steadily wider. AKA, Chubby-chaser.

Now that's a good woman! Thanks to Kevin Smith for giving us this glimpse into his mind. Check out Twitter and Kevin's account for a full archive of the day. There were many other interesting moments in this experiement."












The Summer movie season is over. Sadly I did not get to all the flicks I had hoped but here is my run down on the ones that I was able to catch. As for the rest, we have DVDs to soon enjoy.


Terminator Salvation : Even Christian Bale could not save this mess. Not the fight for the future I expected. Busted!

Drag Me To Hell: Great Sam Raimi fright fest. Felt like a throw back, in a good way.'buster!

X-Men Origins: Wolverine: The potential was there but once again an X-film got buried in too many characters. Busted!

Angels and Demons: Interesting but not truly intriguing. Would have liked to have seen Tom Hanks get on the helicopter and give us the ending from the book. Busted!

Star Trek: Great cast, interesting plot, and left us with a whole new world to explore. Franchise revived.'buster!

The Hurt Locker: Intense and griping. Catch it if you can!'buster!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince: Felt like a commercial for the final films. Tried too hard to be a teenage love story and lost the cohesion of the story. Busted!

Transformers II: Apparently there could be a worse movie about talking robots made.Busted!

GI Joe: God help me, I really liked it. Was a fun summer ride.'buster!

District 9: Pure sci-fi fun. Original story took you to places a run of the mill alien flick would not.'buster!

Up: First movie of the summer I saw and hands down the best. This one had it all.'buster!







As a huge horror movie fan I love that the fall is upon us. There is nothing more fun than watching a great scary movie with Halloween right around the corner. This week I present you with my list of the Ten Top Horror Movie Icons. When I say, "Icon", I mean that they are instantly recognizable even to people that haven't seen their films. You know who they are and what they are about… usually scaring your pants off! I have a few honorable mentions this week that I will start with: Jigsaw, Candyman, Chucky and Hannibal Lecter. Lecter would have made the list but his films aren't necessarily classified as horror films. Either way though he is an icon of terror at the least. If those mentions have you intrigued I hope that you will enjoy the top of the list too.


10. Zombies
Whether they are the slow lumbering beasts of the Romero films or the running freaks of the Dawn of the Dead remake, Zombies are the stuff of nightmares. They challenge the finality of death and make you wonder if there is an afterlife at all. Their relentless hunger is overwhelming. It is clear that if the Zombie Apocalypse did occur that the question would not be how will we survive but how long.



9. Pennywise
For many folks clowns are scary and they don't come any scarier than It's Pennywise. Many of the characters on this list have had decade long franchises to build up their reputations but in one mini-series, Tim Curry took terror to new levels as the clown that floats down there. He could be smiling with those bright red lips one second and baring fangs the next as he makes your worst fears come to life. Beep, Beep Ritchie!


8. Michael Myers
Talk about family trouble, Michael Myers is the unstoppable juggernaut of bloodline drama. Who knew a painted William Shatner mask would one day become some recognizable as a visage of death. He will kill anyone and everyone who gets in his way of ending the lives of his entire family. Is he evil incarnate or just a messed up kid?



7. Dracula
Screw Edward and those other Twilight vampires, the real master of the night and original gothic icon is Dracula. He has seen many big screen incarnations over the years but non captured his grace and darkness like Bela Lugosi. All you blood drinkers that followed better step in line and recognize his regality.

6. Norman Bates
The original cross dressing crazy man spends most of his murderous moments in the shadows but is clearly deserving of a place on this list. There is nothing mystical or supernatural about his designs, just pure insanity. Looking into Bates' eyes is like staring into a pool of madness that threatens to swallow you whole. Forget the weak sequels that followed Hitchcock's masterpiece. In this case the first was definitely the best.


5. Pinhead
From the mind of Clive Barker sprang the S&M demons, the Cenobites. Bound in leather and ready to fillet your soul like a fresh fish, Pinhead will take no excuses as he drags you screaming into hell. An agent of order, like the symmetrical pattern of pins adorning his head, Pinhead wants nothing more than to give you an eternity of perfection… painful, excruciating perfection.


4. The Alien
I am not talking about E.T. this time around. There is nothing cuddly about the acid blooded, Giger designed monstrosities of the Alien franchise. Described by several writer's as "the monstruous feminine", these beasts play on some of our more primal instincts as they birth themselves from your chest and destroy all obstacles to their continued survival. Dark, futuristic and uncontrollable these beasts are a hard image to shake once they get burned into your mind.



3. Jason Voorhees
The ultimate deterrent to underage drinking, drugs and unprotected sex is this seven foot giant who will stop at nothing to see the teenage hooligans who caused his death and killed his mother destroyed. Of course, those original teens are long gone but there are always a few horny drunks willing to camp out by that fateful lake and take their chances. Jason is slow and methodical. He knows he will get you eventually, so go ahead and run. No one will ever look at a hockey mask the same way again thanks to this series of films.


2. Freddy Krueger
This son of a hundred maniacs is a sadistic bastard who gets you when you're at your most defenseless, in your dreams. Freddy has gone beyond just being a horror movie icon and is ensconced fully in our pop culture. Darker and more frightening when he first showed up on the scene, Krueger of late has become more of a wise cracking arbiter of gimmicky death. Still he is known by all and beloved by many. I truly hope that the reboot of his series will bring him back to his darker roots and once again make us afraid to fall asleep.



1. Bruce the Shark
Nothing evokes a fear more primal in me than the image of that dorsal fin breaking the night water at the beginning of Jaws. Bruce (well that is what Spielberg named the oft broken down mechanical shark of the first Jaws film) is a non-stop, eating machine that doesn't care who you are or where you're from. All he knows is that you are in his fish bowl and that makes you food. The true reason I think Jaws evoked and continues to evoke so much terror is that it could happen. Check the news, there are several great white sharks stalking New England at this moment. Beaches are closed for Labor Day weekend on Cape Cod. I know that there is no one waiting to kill me in my dreams, nor is there a clown in the sewers kidnapping children, but are there creatures in the ocean waiting to take a chunk out of my fleshy backside? You bet your ass there are.

Did I miss anyone that makes your pulse race and makes you sleep with one eye open?

Your Tuesday ‘Tube Bonus Clip

Check out this cool Direct TV commercial to see that yes, these Horror Movie Icons of ours do indeed have hearts:




Until next week watch out for the bombs, catch a good blockbuster and check out a sweet babe or two. Oh, and for goodness sake, bookmark http://www.411mania.com. Are you using Twitter? You can follow me and 411mania's zones on these pages:

twitter.com/Mykelogan
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(All information and gossip gathered from Fark.com, Aintitcoolnews.com, Hollywoodreporter.com, Moviehole.net, Reuters.com, Variety.com, MTV.com, IMDB.com, IGN.com WENN news, and Darkhorizons.com)


If you have been watching the Great Pop Tart Battle of 2009, you know that the fascist soldiers of the Cinnamon Empire think that they are winning. Do you disagree? If so, please email me to donate Chocolate Fudge Pop Tarts to our cause! Remember, choosing Cinnamon means the terrorists win!