The Hollywood 5 & 1 09.12.09: Hollywood Damage Control Edition
Posted by Steve Gustafson on 09.12.2009
The match we've all been waiting for! Angelina Jolie battles Megan Fox over a movie role! What blockbuster franchise does Jenna Haze spoof? Hugh Hefner can finally enjoy the single life! George Clooney gets the wrong kind of stripper and I weigh in on Jon and Kate Gosselin! Find out why this is the #1 Celebrity report on 411mania!
BEFORE WE BEGIN...
Welcome to the Hollywood 5 & 1! I'm Steve Gustafson, and this is the place to come to when you need to get your celebrity gossip fix.
Have you heard about the movie Paranormal Activity from Paramount Pictures? How has this gone under my radar? I know, I know...this belongs in a movie report, not celebrity gossip, but cut me some slack. It's coming out in limited release on September 25th but check out the trailer...
Scary, right? Speaking of scary, it helps me move on to my next subject.
Jon and Kate Gosselin. Up until now I have not mentioned their name, reported any news, or ran a picture of them. My personal thoughts on them are pretty much that they don't deserve the amount of media attention they receive and that they have profited off their children for monetary gain and fame. Also, in all the back and forth between these two, who's looking out for the kids' welfare? Maybe it's me. But this column shouldn't be what I want. It should be about what YOU want. Are the Gosselin duo so different from Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag? Or Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie? Or the Tila Tequila incident? Should I start reporting on the Gosselin drama?
Are they worth it?
And just because....
I went back and forth about finding a place to put this. Are any of you interested in seeing Kendra Wilkinson pregnant? Where's the line when it comes to reporting on celebrity news and intruding on the life of a public figure? Whoa! When did this column become so weighty? Let's just look at Kendra, shall we?
If that baby comes out wearing a robe and smoking a pipe...there's going to be trouble!
WHO SAID WHAT? "He (Schwarzenegger) called me and he said he was concerned. He said, 'It's getting close to the marriage, how's the sex?... Keep your eye on that.' He doesn't mean it in a sexy way, he means keep it (the marriage passionate), because you forget about the important things and sex is important in the marriage. He's reminding me: 'Don't forget about the sex!'"
Tom Arnold credits California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger's sex advice with calming his pre-wedding jitters, after he was reminded pleasing his wife will be "the most important" part of marriage.
CELEBRITY TWITTER-A-GO-GO!
Twitter is here to stay! Each week I scan the headlines, looking for news and tweets, so I can deliver them to you.
Here we go again. Again. Lindsay Lohan has slammed Samantha Ronson's on Twitter and claimed the DJ called her "gross." At some point between 1:30 Wednesday afternoon and 7:30 am on Thursday Lohan went from tweeting well wishes to her on-off-on-off-on-off-on-off-on-again girlfriend to attacking her "cheats, errors" and claiming that "you Just told me that your friends are worth more than i am 2 your family & that i'm gross" When did Twitter become the arguing place of choice for fading celeb's? Lohan kept the drama up when her voicemails were obtained, then posted online. Seems like Lindsay's favorite password is 1234. Yes. That is really her password on her security system and her voicemail. I feel bad picking on her, but she makes it so easy. Easy as 1, 2, 3...4.
See what you miss out on if you don't follow Linds on Twitter? Real heavy stuff.
Are you following the REAL 411mania on Twitter? Don't be fooled by the imitators!
Sweet Tweet "Rumor control: How do I put this like a gentleman...I have never high fived Kristin Cavalari with my penis."
John Mayer (johncmayer) laughed off rumors that he is romancing Kristin Cavallari. He was reported to have been secretly dating Cavallari for the past two years, using a mutual friend's home as their meeting place. That's one way to squash it.
2 bathing suit pictures to tease and appease your eyeballs!
VIDEO OF THE WEEK
From time to time a video catches my eye and I'll pass it on to you. It might not be new or even that funny. But I'll leave that up to you to decide. If you are already my friend on Facebook (www.facebook.com/stevegustafson), then you've see this. If not, let's get manly and witness the Greatest Fight Ever!
Alright, let's get to the actual Hollywood 5 & 1. I go through 5 things out of Hollywood this past week that made me scratch my head and "& 1" Model of the Week! Let's go!
Hef Can't Catch a Break...Or Can He?
Show of hands and be honest. Who knew he was still married? After an 11-year separation, Hugh Hefner, has filed for divorce from his second wife, former Playmate Kimberly Conrad, citing irreconcilable differences, Los Angeles court records show. Well, I would say so. The pair were married in July 1989 and separated nine years later, but remained legally wed. Conrad is the mother of two of Hefner's four children, and had for years been supported by him in a home next to the Playboy mansion. Hefner told People he isn't ruling out another walk down the aisle someday but, "It's unlikely since I haven't been very successful at it." Hefner claimed Conrad cheated on him before their marriage fell apart, but that's not why he's finally demanding a divorce. The Playboy founder told TMZ.com that he made the decision to officially break it off with her because she filed a $5 million lawsuit against him last month relating to the sale of a house they owned together. See, he's cool until you try and grab his money sack. Let this be a lesson.
Back on the market and ready to enjoy the single life! Finally!
DAMAGE CONTROL ALERT
Look. I don't wear a black robe or carry a gavel. I'm no judge. But this looks...fishy to me. Katherine Heigl is planning to become Hollywood's latest adopting mommy, the actress has filed papers and plans to take in a little Korean girl, according to reports. Heigl, who was recently granted a leave of absence from the medical drama Grey's Anatomy, started the adoption process more than six months ago with husband Josh Kelley, according to RadarOnline.com. Insiders claim the adoption of 10-month-old Nayleigh will be complete by the end of the week, and the family will grow by one by Monday. A source says, "She is thrilled. She and Josh are so happy." Congrats to the them and I take back any allusion to the fact that I thought this was a ploy to improve her image in Tinseltown and take attention away from the bad press she's been receiving. This is good stuff.
Speaking of good stuff...
Fun With Spoofs!
Move over Robert Pattinson, there's a new sexy vampire in town! But I don't think this will satisfy the typical Twilight fan. Get ready for the spoof we've all been waiting for...or at least knew it was coming. Oops...get it? Anyways, an adult film actor portraying to be Pattinson's Edward Cullen and making love on camera to a faux Bella Swan is making its way to the small screen. Wait, do they still have regular adult theaters anymore? Do they still exist? Back to the news. This Isn't Twilight: The XXX Parody, an adult movie that shows Twilight has gone mainstream. The flick will be released on October 15 for those keeping track. Taking over the role of Bella from Kristen Stewart will be the legendary Jenna Haze, the Female Performer of the Year at the 2009 AVN Awards. No word from the Twilight folks if this movie will suck or blow. You know, I could make jokes all day long. Give me yours in the comments section below.
Just think, both will make two very different audiences scream and moan. Impressive.
Angelina Jolie vs. Megan Fox
Ring the bell! Megan Fox has gone on record saying she's not Angelina Jolie! That might be true, but a new report states the actresses are pitted against each other for the lead role in Barbarella, the remake of a 1968 film. I smell catfight! "This will be the first time Ange and Megan have ever faced off for the same role," a source told MSN in Canada. "Ange is really feeling the pressure. Ange knows that to win roles she has to look youthful." Who will win? Does it matter? It's Barbarella! Still, advantage Fox, who is on a hot streak these days. She's starring in a much-publicized movie, Jennifer's BodySaturday Night Live. Does Angelina still have it? Is there a dark horse out there? Cast your vote below!
Who will be Barbarella?
Somewhere Brad Pitt is Laughing!
This...this isn't pretty. For anyone. George Clooney came to the Venice Film Festival to handle the tough questions. But I don't think he was expecting this. Clooney was fielding queries during a televised press conference for his new movie, The Men Who Stare at Goats, when he got an eyeful from a male questioner. "I am gay, George, and I think I am in love with you...Please take me," the dude said, stripping down to his underwear. "May I kiss you, please? Just one kiss?" The ever stable Clooney didn't miss a beat. "It's hard when you take a big chance and it doesn't really work," he chuckled. Ripping off his shirt, the man shouted to a bemused Clooney, "Please, take me George!" Well, look for yourself...
That guy just got CLOONIED!
And now it's time with the newest sensation on 411mania...The & 1 Model of the Week! That's right! Every week I'll invite a model to stop by for a quick review and share a delicious photo or two.
For Week 3 of the & 1 Model of the Week we take already hit a little speed bump. Due to a not being able to meet up since she received a last minute call for a modeling gig, I have to push it back a week. But I won't leave you hanging. I'll give you a little something to tide you over. Feast your eyes on the mysterious and lovely...Anekee Van Der Velden !
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present...Anekee Van Der Velden .
For the big boys reading this, you can check out her site. She's actually a good writer and entertaining. Plus, her pictures are always...pleasing. Stop back next week when we return to our regularly scheduled & 1 Model of the Week!
Before I say GOODBYE!
I would be remiss if I didn't mention some of the other OUTSTANDING articles on www.411mania.com. You would be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't peep around the site. I always get my daily habit of reading. Here's a small sample!
I like what your doing here. Very insightful, thoughtful, and tasteful. But , the last page? Those have got to be the biggest tatas I've ever seen in my life! Those can't be real! I'm a woman, but I emailed this to every live and breathing man I know. I think they would thank you as well. Peace
Posted By: Cbauer (Guest) on September 12, 2009 at 12:23 AM
Greatest fight scene EVER! HO HO HO!
Posted By: Santa (Guest) on September 12, 2009 at 02:15 AM
Why would you do that to your loyal readers? I will need therapy for the Mayer photo. Just for that, Chocolate Fudge Pop Tarts win.
Posted By: The Great Capt. Smooth (Guest) on September 12, 2009 at 09:39 AM
Jon and Kate = Zero views!
Posted By: frankie (Guest) on September 12, 2009 at 02:12 PM
haha...I wouldn't be surprised if that guy was actually arranged by Pitt. Those guys are always playing jokes on each other.
Or maybe the guy was pulling some kind of local radio station prank.
Posted By: Earl (Guest) on September 12, 2009 at 05:06 PM
@Cbauer, Thank you! Anekee is...I don't even know how to put it. Read her writing and you'll get a better idea. I've been trying to get her to write for 411mania for a while!
@Santa, You know what puts it over the top for me? The "See ya!" at the end.
@The Great Capt. Smooth, Chocolate Fudge? BAH! I hear they soon will be off the market. Much like that bathing suit Mr. Mayer wore.
@Frankie, The people have spoken. I received a couple of emails that echoed your sentiment. Jon and Kate will have no place at the 5 & 1 hotel!
@Earl, I thought the exact same thing! This is something he would do. Even if he wasn't involved, he's gotta love it!
Posted By: stevethegoose (Registered) on September 13, 2009 at 03:16 AM
Steve, if you are looking for a cinnamon fix, try the new Cinnabon snack bars, they are usually by the Pop Tarts or granola bars. If you have a PapaJohns in Maryland, I'd check out their Cinnapie. Also, have you ever had Ben and Jerry's Cinnamon Bun ice cream?
Posted By: The Great Capt. Smooth (Guest) on September 13, 2009 at 09:48 AM
Copyright � 2011 411mania.com, LLC. All rights reserved.
Click here for our privacy policy. Please help us serve you better, fill out our survey.
Use of this site signifies your agreement to our terms of use.
