Babes, Bombs, and Blockbusters Movie News Report 10.27.09

Posted by Mike Gorman on 10.27.2009

The Witching Hour is upon us and check out this week’s 3B’s news report a look at the Top Ten Gross Out Moments on film, a visit from several scream queens, and your usual dose of Hollywood news including who’s off Footloose, who’s on My Fair Lady, and what recent hit is headed for sequelsville.

Happy Halloween week to all you ghouls and goblins out there! Glad you've stopped by and hope you will stick around to check out a fun Twitter related announcement at the end of this week's column!

Jamie Lee Curtis, the original Halloween I & II

In honor of Halloween, you're getting bonus babes this week. Feast your eyes on seven of the hottest "Scream queens."


Neve Campbell, the Scream trilogy and the upcoming Scream 4












Check out today's news bombs!

PA 2: Electric Boogaloo?
IGN reports that Paramount studios is considering exercising their option to produce a sequel to the current top film in the country Paranormal Activity. This is not shocking news seeing as the film which only cost around $15,000 to make is closing in on the $100 million dollar mark. Paramount chairman Brad Grey told the LA Times, "We have the rights on a worldwide basis to do Paranormal 2 and we're looking to see if that makes some sense." And if they have any common sense at all they will not create a sequel. We were taken in once by the gimmick, I don't think it will happen again. But then the viewing public went through this once with the Blair Witch Project and we lined up like lemmings with hopes that Paranormal Activity would be a better scare. Fool me once, shame on you… Fool me twice, and I must be a part of the average movie viewing public.



Jennifer Love Hewitt, the I Know What You Did Last Summer series


Footloose and director free!
According to Variety, Kenny Ortega has left the production of the Footloose remake over "creative differences." It is said that Ortega, director of the High School Musicals and this week's Michael Jackson, This is It, wanted a $30 million budget with elaborately staged musical numbers while Paramount wanted a budget of less than $25 million with less of a focus on the music. Paramount will need to move quickly to fill the director's chair as production is set to begin in March when the film's star Chace Crawford is on hiatus from "Gossip Girl." First Zac Efron jumps ship and now Kenny Ortega. Perhaps there is hope for this project after all.



Famke Janssen, star of House on Haunted Hill, The Faculty


Keira nabs Eliza
It appears that Keira Knightley has been selected for the role of Eliza Doolittle in the upcoming adaptation of the classic musical My Fair Lady. Joe Wright will be directing Emma Thompson's script according to the UK's Telegraph. Can she sing? It is not like this will be a supporting role with just a few musical moments. As always, we shall see.



Kristen Bell, of Pulse


Doc Savage to come to life
Writer Shane Black ("Lethal Weapon," "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang") told Ain't It Cool News this week that he will be handling the film version of the Doc Savage comic book series. He went on to share that the story will be an original one that will attempt to capture the essence of Lester Dent's work instead of adapting one specific storyline. Doc Savage was introduced in the pulp magazines of the 1930's and this film will be set during that time period. It is great to see this character getting a chance to shine again and in a way that seems respectful of the source material. With the recent propensity to "update" everything it is nice to see that this be a period piece and not set in modern times.



Halle Berry, star of Gothika












This week ‘buster or Busted?! checks out the original film series that brought Michael Myers into our homes and our nightmares. Over the years since the first Halloween premiered in 1978 there have been some big hits and real misses in this franchise.


Halloween: The original. Terrifying to this day. 'buster!

Halloween II: Picks right up after the end of the first and continues Laurie Strode's worst night of her life. Not as frightening but a great sequel over all.'buster!

Halloween III: Season of the Witch: They tried something new. They shouldn't have. I will never wear a mask again. Busted!

Halloween IV: The Return of Michael Myers: Laurie Strode apparently had a child. Michael wants her dead. Weak on scares but was shines a bit brighter when you compare it to the last entry. 'buster!

Halloween V: The Revenge of Michael Myers: Direct continuation of the last film as Michael Myers' niece struggles to survive her uncle's rampage. Had a pretty cool ending that implied Michael's evil could be hereditary but did not really deliver. Busted

Halloween VI: Curse of Michael Myers: There are multiple versions of this film out there. One, a convoluted mess about druids and curses. The other a chopped up nonsensical remix of that film, which is the one shown in theaters. Both are weak but the unreleased "director's cut" makes more sense. You can't buy it in stores but it can be found. Busted!

Halloween H20: It's twenty years since Michael's rampage and surprise Laurie Strode is alive (and apparently doesn't care about what happened to her first child… did I mention the incestuous birth in the sixth film?). Surprisingly it was a pretty good film and seemed to capture some of the old school scares 'buster!

Halloween Resurrection: Busta Rhymes and Tyra Banks select college kids for a reality show set in the old Michael Myers' house, and hilarity ensues. Ok, bloody death ensues but I had to try and make one nice comment about this crap. Busted!









This week I take a look at the Top Ten Gross Out Scenes of all time. They don't necessarily have to come from horror films as this list is not strictly about gore. Instead it is about those scenes in movies that make your stomach flip, your eyes close, and your breathing slow. What follows are the ten scenes that stand out in my mind as bringing me close to the edge every time I see them. Recreating this list was quite the experience.


10. Lardass pukes in Stand by Me
Push the fat kid too far and he's going to teach you a lesson. This is what happened when Lardass entered the Blueberry Pie Eating Contest. He got his revenge on everyone in the town who made fun of him and his girth by making himself sick during the contest. This led to one of film's more memorable vomiting montages and all of that purple goo definitely turned my stomach. It was a while before I wanted to see pie again after seeing this sequence. (Ok, I didn't say a long while!)




9. Deep shaving in Cabin Fever
Shaving on film can be pretty precarious even in the most normal of circumstances but when it happens in a horror film about a flesh eating bacteria attacking a bunch of kids in the woods you know it will not be good. What got me the most in this scene was the incredible range of sounds that accompanied the gory scraping. You heard every bit of flesh get scraped off by the razor and saw the immediate results, even before the character herself knew what was going on.


8. Morgan's first supersized meal in Supersize Me
Puke is a common denominator in many gross out scenes but there was something in Morgan Spurlock's case that made it different. It was real. One of the rules that Spurlock set up in his quest to eat only McDonald's food for 30 days was that when he was offered to supersize his meal, he must accept. When this finally happened he was so overwhelmed by the food and beverage that he got sick. As he hung his head out the window you could see his convulsions and hear the splatter of vomit on the cement. It does not seem like a big deal but this was no fake out, neither was my nausea after seeing it happen.




7. The bathroom scene in Trainspotting
The bathroom that Ewan McGregor's character was forced to use due to his bout with diarrhea in Trainspotting is the nightmare I think we all expect every time we used a public restroom. The scene is shocking enough when he actually uses the disgusting toilet and gets worse when he goes looking for the drug suppositories he expelled into the literal bowl of crap. I gagged the first time he plunged his hands into the murky mess and did so again when I watched that clip today.


6. Sautéed brain in Hannibal
Ray Liotta's Paul is the guest of honor at a very special dinner hosted by Hannibal Lecter. Lecter removes Paul's skull cap and gently sautés slices of his brain and then feeds them to him. The whole time you watch this scene you can't help but yell (with your inside or outside voice) "Is this really happening?" Realistic and truly sadistic, this moment is a true gross out on many levels.




5. Shit eating grin in Salo, or 120 days of Sodom
Some films and their images get burned into your consciousness forever. This is one of them. I was made to watch this film (and then write a paper about it) when I was in college. I had not heard of previously and I soon after wished that I hadn't. It is a scathing discourse on the evils of capitalism wrapped up in an orgy beyond description. In the one scene I highlight for this list, a man is made to consume his own excrement. Do I have to get more descriptive? They make him eat his own shit. Excuse for a moment while I let my stomach settle…


4. Special custard in Dead Alive
Peter Jackson's Dead Alive is one of the goriest films ever made. That said, there is one scene that is particularly gross. As a group settles in for lunch around the dining room table, the main character's decaying mother seems like an odd bird of sorts to the guests but unbeknownst to them she is coming apart. One extremely disgusting moment comes as a gloopy pus like substance spurts from her wounds and ends up in one of the diners custard, which he then proceeds to eat. It is as bad as it sounds.




3. Mr. Creosote in The Meaning of Life
One of my most beloved film characters is also one that makes me the most queasy. Mr. Creosote is a hugely fat man who is a regular guest at the French restaurant in Monty Python's hilarious classic. Creosote is a true glutton to admire as he is able to simply regurgitate when full and keeps on eating. This display of projectile vomiting gets the gross out going as other patrons soon begin to hurl themselves. He eventually consumes the entire menu and like most self respecting fat guys knows his limits (a joke people, a joke!), but the waiter coaches him into having that last "wafer thin" mint which sets off a chain reaction that leads to Creosote's explosion. The coup de grace of the scene comes as he sits chest cavity open, blood still pumping and debris everywhere. The waiter, who shielded himself from the mess as he knew it was coming, returns with the man's check. For me this intensifies the gross factor as it implies he has had this happen before and then you get trapped in that line of thought wondering how that could even work. Yuck!


2. Lust in Seven
There are so many cringe worthy moments in the movie Seven that it was truly hard to narrow it down to just one. After much debate with friends, I decided to select the scene involing Lust as the worst. It is the situation with the man forced to wear the intricate bladed device and then made to have sex with a prostitute. You didn't need to see this action happen to know how incredibly disturbing this was, you just needed to see the Polaroid of the apparatus. After that it is really unnecessary to even watch as the man is debriefed. It is best to just swallow hard, hold your breath and get passed the moment.




1. Divine's snack at the end of Pink Flamingos
John Waters is the king of the gross out moments in film and his band of hard core Balitmorians went passed many boundaries in most of their productions. The one that tops them all to me is the final scene of Pink Flamingos featuring the now deceased drag queen, Divine. In the scene she walks over to a poodle, it poops into her hand and in a continuous shot she swallows it. Like the Supersize Me moment, this one is intensified by its reality. Stories are told about how Divine made sure that the dog ate nothing but grade A meat for the week leading up to the scene and that she freaked out afterwards calling a hospital to say that a mentally challenged relative had eaten dog feces & what results could they expect. She ate actual poop for a role. That is commitment and that is the ultimate gross out moment on film!

What films make you queasy? Did I miss one of your favorites?



Your Tuesday ‘Tube Bonus Clip

This week I want to use this space to promote a new feature I am getting going that allows you to let out your inner fat kid on Twitter. Welcome to:



Have you eaten something particularly bad for you?
Craving a specific snack like it is nobody's business?
Maybe your jeans are tight and you're having a fat day?
Or maybe like me, you a fat guy (or girl) living your life and encountering some unique moments that you know other peeps could relate to?

Post it on Twitter and add the tag "#fatter", then you can check out your post and others from fellow fatties in substance or spirit on my web site at:
http://www.mykelogan.com/fatter

In the next week or so "The Fatter Blog" will also launch on that site as I document the life and times of a not so typical fat guy… me. Ok, so maybe sometimes I fit the stereotypes but what are you gonna do?

Isn't the "Fatter" bird the cutest thing you have ever seen? Spread the word, Twitter just got a little wider! In honor of this announcement I leave you with the ultimate musical homage to fat by Weird Al Yankovic:

Weird Al Yankovic - I'm FatUploaded by Usher1985. - See more comedy videos.

One last scream queen… Have a great Halloween all!!!


Jessica Biel, the new Texas Chainsaw Massacre


(All information and gossip gathered from Fark.com, Aintitcoolnews.com, Hollywoodreporter.com, Moviehole.net, Reuters.com, Variety.com, MTV.com, IMDB.com, IGN.com WENN news, and Darkhorizons.com)