The Hollywood 5 & 1 11.21.09: Full Moon Edition
Posted by Steve Gustafson on 11.21.2009
This week: Tila Tequila has an online meltdown, Twilight's Kristen Stewart causes a fuss on Twitter and Conan O'Brien takes a shot at New Moon on his show! Demi Moore's hip goes missing and Sofia Vergara makes an awkward slip! Martha Stewart takes a swipe at Rachael Ray and Johnny Depp keeps it sexy! Plus 5 things about Jennifer Aniston you didn't know and Elisabetta Canalis is our "& 1" Model of the Week!
BEFORE WE BEGIN...
Welcome back to another edition of the Hollywood 5 & 1! I'm Steve Gustafson, and this spot to be to get your fill of celebrity gossip. I read through all this stuff, so you don't have to. Ya crumb bums!
THIS IS IT! This MONDAY I officially take over writing The Big Screen Bulletin from Chad Webb! Not a dream! Not a HOAX! Tune in for the start of a whole new era!
Saying that...NEXT WEEK on the 5 & 1 I'll be adding a L.A. Correspondent to the mix! Yes, a longtime reader and friend will be lending a hand in covering the latest gossip. Who will it be? You'll have to check it out...NEXT SATURDAY!
Thanksgiving is almost upon us. And what better way to celebrate than with helping? A dear friend and classmate of mine, Courtney, is involved with a great cause. One that I like so much that I would like to share with you. Here she is to say a few words:
$15 Provides a Winter Coat for a Homeless Child. Nearly 14 million children in the United States, 19% of all children, live in families with incomes below the federal poverty level. $21,200 for a family of four. Research shows that families need an income of about twice that level to cover basic expenses. For the cost of 3 lattes, you can give a child the gift of warmth and hope this winter. Your one time tax-deductible donation of $15 provides one needy child with a brand new winter coat through Operation Warm. As we approach Thanksgiving, let us all reflect upon the things for which we are grateful. Please give according to what you are able to give. www.firstgiving.com/warmchild
Thank you so much.
Do you live in DC/MD/VA? If so, 411mania's own John Meehan's sent out the invite for Sunday, November 22 to for a meet-n-greet before Survivor Series. THAT'S THIS WEEKEND! Here's the details:
Survivor Series at the Verizon Center
Date: Sunday, November 22
Time: 6 p.m.
Location: Fado Irish Pub (808 7th St NW)
Email him for more details at johnMichaelMeehan@gmail.com!
Not worth putting this in the official 5. MELTDOWN ALERT!Tila Tequila's lawyer blames his client's meltdown on former fling Shawne Merriman. **YAWN** Is anyone buying this? I'm going out on a limb and saying this is Publicity 101. Whenever a Y-Level celeb starts to cool in popularity they act a little crazy to get attention. THEN they go through a "rehab" of some sorts so the tabloids can celebrate their overcoming adversity. Sorry, Britney did it better and Lindsay is gearing up to top THAT. So Tila, nice try, but to get your way in the 5 & 1, you'll have to do better than rant, "I am an angel...because I am here to save the world with my army...People call me an attention whore...or whatever...but excuse me I'm a grown ass woman and I'm confident in myself...I think a woman's body is a beautiful thing...that's why I'm a lesbian...I was born naked...anybody who is against that is gay and in denial." **YAWN**
Kinda sad when an image like this doesn't create a frenzy like it used to.
WHO SAID WHAT? "No, but I think you have a duty to CNN.com to come back with a fluff piece so you can play the interview with John Mayer right under "Man Builds Rocket Out of Baked Potato," which you love putting on Headline News. You'll make a little story highlight out of it, you know, "John Mayer dated, now he doesn't, putting out 'Battle Studies' Number 17, he's a weird dude." I know what you have to do, and I'm here for ya, I'm here for ya!"
John Mayer in one of the greatest interviews I've ever read on CNN. Worth a read for the way Mayer breaks fame down and relating to the press.
Wokka Wokka Wokka!
CELEBRITY TWITTER-A-GO-GO!
Are you on Twitter? Why not? You get to read what REAL CELEB'S THINK! You can be a part of the story. Well, maybe not. But here's a tidbit of what you are missing:
You may have missed the news that Neil Patrick Harris has joined Twitter. I repeat...Neil Patrick Harris has joined Twitter. Also, I'm well aware that his popularity is reaching the point where you all are about to start backlashing on him.
Kristen Stewart's appearance on the Today show didn't sit well with Twilight fans who wish she would lighten up a little bit off the big screen. They do have a point. Does this girl EVER smile? The Twitterverse was all over Stewart with postings like, "Kristen Stewart is just so boring. Looks boring. Acts as if shes bored. Shes plain boring," Poppins__09 posted on Twitter after the interview. "Omg. How can Kristen Stewart be an actress when she can't even answer a question in an interview without stuttering and being awkward," aurenhayes7 also posted. Did you see her body language? She appeared unfriendly towards The Today Show group as she sat hunched over, her arms crossed against her chest, tapping her foot nervously up and down. "Ughh kristen stewart cheer up already. you're on the today show," helenutswoah posted. "Kristen Stewart on 'Today' was a waste of time. I wonder if her on 'Regis & Kelly' is going to be any better. It will have to wait for now," wrote jesseboijai. Unfortunately, the reviews of Stewart's appearance on "Regis & Kelly" a mere hour later didn't get any better. "Ok Kristen Stewart on Regis & Kely today....awkward...studders in real life as in the movie...not a good actress...horrible interview!!!!" AmandaBarberio posted. Maybe she's a method actress or something?
SMILE! It's not that bad. Really.
This is the perfect time to remind you that you can follow me and 411mania on Twitter with a quick click!
5 THINGS ABOUT JENNIFER ANISTON YOU DIDN'T KNOW!
Who's she dating now, anyways? Let's get to know Jennifer Aniston a little better, shall we?
1. She was cast in her first television role in 1990, starring as a regular on the short-lived series Molloy and in the TV movie Camp Cucamonga. 2. She appeared in the 1992 horror film, Leprechaun. 3. Aniston has had two septoplasties to correct her deviated septum. 4. She is the godmother of Coco Riley Arquette, the daughter of Courteney Cox Arquette and David Arquette. 5. She is a supporter of Friends of El Faro, a grassroots non-profit organization.
And now you know...
Nice tie.
VIDEO OF THE WEEK
From time to time a video catches my eye and I'll pass it on to you. It might not be new or even that funny. But I'll leave that up to you to decide. This week Conan O'Brien brings the laughs. All at the expense of Twilight: New Moon. Watch it till the end for his amazing reaction shot.
Alright, let's get to the actual Hollywood 5 & 1. I go through 5 things out of Hollywood this past week that made me scratch my head plus our "& 1" Model of the Week! Let's go!
They Still Photoshop in Magazines? My Fake SHOCK!
The news is out! But is it a surprise? Everyone knows that magazines extensively airbrush the stars on their covers. Why? To look good of course! The celebs like a little touch up and people want to see something pleasing to the eye on the newsstand. Right? But this might be pushing it a bit. Demi Moore is on the latest (December) cover of W and seems to be missing a huge chunk of her hip. Lost to digitally tampering? Take a look at Moore's left hip (our right), and it seems that what used to be flesh is now a great deal of white space. Nice message to be sending to the masses. Or is it just lazy editing? Magazine covers go through an detailed process of approvals, so it's shocking that this one made it to press. Unless she really is missing her hip.
The cover!
The missing hip!
FOR THE LADIES. And Certain Males.
The 2009 Sexiest Man Alive was announced. The winner? None other than Johnny Depp. Depp, who also scored the honor in 2003, has joined an elite club of two-time SMA title holders along with Brad Pitt and George Clooney. I'm aware that I usually have plenty of pictures of the ladies, but let's throw a bone to my other readers!
I was going to make some sort of "walk his plank" joke but that's too low brow, even for me.
In second place...
You know what this mean....
CLOONIED!
Martha VS. Rachael
ME-OW! Martha Stewart has gone on record to say Rachael Ray isn't fit to peel her carrots! In her first television interview since serving five months in prison in 2004 for lying to investigators about a stock trade, Stewart talked to ABC News' Nightline about rebuilding her brand, and slams Ray one of her TV competitors. "Well, to me, she professed that she could, cannot bake," Stewart says of Ray in the interview. "She, just did a new cookbook which is just a re-edit of a lot of her old recipes. She, and that's not good enough for me." When it comes to writing a book, Stewart says she want to publish something that "is a unique and lasting thing. Something that will really fulfill a need in someone's library." You tell 'em, Martha! Ray, she says, "is different." Stewart says Ray is "more of an entertainer...with her bubbly personality, than she is a teacher, like me. That's not what she's professing to be." What does Ray Ray think of all this? "Why would it make me mad?" Ray asks. "Her skill set is far beyond mine. That's simply the reality of it." Ray adds that "that doesn't mean that what I do isn't important too...I don't consider it needling. I really just think she's being honest. She does have a better skill set than I do when it comes to producing a beautiful, perfect, high-quality meal." Says Ray, "I'd rather eat Martha's than mine, too." Wow. That didn't turn into the cat fight I was imaging, BUT it does give me an excuse to run this picture of Ray!
Happy baking!
Yay for Today!
Finally some news worth reporting when it comes to Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. They recently had their scheduled appearance on The Today Show cancelled, and Bratty Pratty was not too happy about it. Pratt believes that this has something to do with the last time he and his wife were on The Today Show alongside Al Roker, which ended, like most of their appearances do, in total chaos. The couple had been slated to promote their new book, How to Be Famous: Our Guide to Looking the Part, Playing the Press, and Becoming a Tabloid Fixture. Ugh. If you bought that book I don't want you reading this column. Seriously. Go over to insidepulse or something. A rep for The Today Show told Usmagazine.com, "Due to a change in the show's schedule, we had to cancel the interview with Spencer and Heidi Pratt." Good for them! Once the interview was cancelled, Pratt wasted no time taking to his Twitter to express his douche anger. Spencer wrote, "WEATHERMAN I thought you were out of town today getting your stomache (sic) stapled again? you look very sick? Do you always look like your (sic) about to die? How old are you 97? You should retire asap - No one would even know?" That's a good way to "play the press". And I didn't even need to buy the book! Pratt continued, "I heard you snitched on your own kids at school! I bet your kids HATE you!! I would if my own dad came to my school and snitched me." Wow! SPENCER STALKS ROKER! Pratt went on to say, "Is it true you have been married 6 times? I'm sure all your wives left you when they realized you were abusive to women! Sicko!" Yeah, Bratty Pratty won't be on Today anytime soon, so that's makes it my NUMBER ONE morning news show!
My favorite picture of them because they are wearing masks.
Oops!
You gotta love the language barrier! Sofia Vergara appeared on The View and made a little quip about being R'd. Her stumble can be blamed on her grip on the English language. What can't be excused is the members of the panel LAUGHING about it! C'mon!
To make up for the poor quality AND having to watch some of The View.
Welcome back to the & 1 Model of the Week! From time to time, I'll invite a model to stop by for a quick interview but will share a delicious photo or two every week.
Week 12 of the & 1 Model of the Week brings us...Elisabetta Canalis! A popular personality on Italian television, Canalis had minor roles in the films Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo and Virgin Territory. She's currently dating George Clooney. If you wanted another reason not to like him...there you go.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present...Elisabetta Canalis!
She's the co-host of the Italian version of Total Request Live!
Stop back next week for another & 1 Model of the Week!
Before I say GOODBYE!
I would be remiss if I didn't mention some of the other OUTSTANDING articles on www.411mania.com. You would be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't peep around the site. I always get my daily habit of reading. Here's a small sample!
Finally, if you have some down time and are looking for a great place for great fun, check out Tiger Flash Games!
Do you have something to say? A celebrity story? Juicy gossip? Shoot me an email at stevethegoose@gmail.com. Thanks again and be safe out there. And just chill...till the next episode...
When not writing for www.411mania.com, Steve Gustafson is getting ready for Thanksgiving.
All pictures courtesy of www.people.com, TMZ.com, www.cnn.com, and www.imdb.com.
THIS IS IT! This MONDAY I officially take over writing The Big Screen Bulletin from Chad Webb!
Goose, don't fuck it up!! lol I'm sure you'll do fine, you and Kristopowitz are my boys. Love both of your columns, just keep Kristopowitz away from any top ten lists and everything will be fine.
Posted By: paco smith (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 04:13 AM
Maybe Kristen Stewart is just bad at interviews, kinda like Kim Basinger. Naturally shy which you wouldn't think with her being an actress. If these twitter fucks wanna see her really act they should watch Adventureland.
Posted By: Guest#0167 (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 04:23 AM
Pretty ironic that you dumps on Tila Tequila for having no relevance and not deserving of being listed in your column, yet you put her picture for your column on 411 front page, and starts off with her in your column summary in an attempt to get more hits.
Confused much?
Posted By: Guest#1127 (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 05:56 AM
Loved the Conan bit!
Posted By: The Great Capt. Smooth (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 07:07 AM
haha you're an idiot. It's just the way her leg is turned (Moore). Same as the pic of the couple with the masks.
Posted By: guest (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 09:25 AM
Maybe Kristen Stewart is just bad at interviews, kinda like Kim Basinger. Naturally shy which you wouldn't think with her being an actress. If these twitter fucks wanna see her really act they should watch Adventureland.
Posted By: Guest#0167 (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 04:23 AM
Exactly...great reminder of Basinger's social anxiety disorder. Kristen could very well have the same or some other anxiety or agoraphobia. People need to be a little bit more informed before they snap to such judgments about others
Posted By: Erik (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 12:24 PM
Sofia Vergara making a joke about rape is a GOOD thing, you pillock.
For one, a hot chick that at least tries to make a joke automatically makes her like 50% more attractive because so few woman have anything like a personality. Secondly, she can seperate fiction and reality. People who get "outraged!" about this are the same kind of people who get "outraged!" about violent video games.
i.e, they are morons not worth thinking about.
Thirdly, I'll pull the freedom of speech card again. When you start telling people that even black comedy is not allowed because you might offend, you legitimise all censorship because anything could offend someone.
Posted By: Frank (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 01:48 PM
Why couldn't Martha badmouth Nigella Lawson? I want to see Lawson and her massive breasts getting more media attention.
Posted By: Zingy (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 02:06 PM
Martha Stewart is an evil bitch and a liar. Rachel Ray has said many times that she's not really a great cook and is more of an entertaininer..direct opposite of what Stewart said.
Just hope she doesnt try to run Rachel over with her car like she did that photographer.
Posted By: AdamS (Guest) on November 21, 2009 at 10:58 PM
