The Hollywood 5 & 1 12.12.09: Cheetah Woods Edition
Posted by Steve Gustafson on 12.12.2009
As the year winds down we take a look at the Top 5 Celebrity Headlines of 2009! What's the number one story of they year? Debbe Dunning and Pamela Anderson meet in the battle of the Tool Time babes! Plus, more Tiger Woods drama, Jon Gosselin gets a reality check, a Nicky Hilton shocker, 5 things about Nigella Lawson, and Shannyn Sossamon is our "& 1" Model of the Week! All this and more inside!
BEFORE WE BEGIN...
Welcome back to another edition of the Hollywood 5 & 1! I'm Steve Gustafson, and this is the place to be to get your fill of celebrity gossip. I read through all the tabloids magazines and gossip sites so you don't have to. You won't find Barbara Walters and her '10 Most Fascinating People' news here. What a yawner that list was! Sorry. It's true.
Congrats to Gary Busey and girlfriend Steffanie Sampson, the couple has a baby on the way.
Speaking of way. Let's get this out of the way! If you missed it, my Big Screen Bulletin, then you missed part 1 (of 3) of my 30 Movies to Watch in 2010! Check it out here and each and every Monday! In the next edition we have Part 2 of the list, my Top 10 Worst Films of the Decade, and my Top 10 Trailers from 2009! We're sending 2009 out with a BANG!
Speaking of bang, do you remember Jenna von Oÿ who played Six from Blossom? What's she up to?
WHO SAID WHAT? "Simon is hot. It's the whole mean, powerful, British gent kind of thing."
Megan Fox and her thoughts about Simon Cowell. Seriously.
Do I smell a Megan Fox music career in the making?
VS
So last week reader Paul Allen suggested we do a Top 10 Hottest Tool Time Girl. Which would be great if we have more than 2 (OK, I know they had a third in a flashback, but c'mon!)! But it got me thinking of a new feature to add to the 5 & 1. VS! A feature where I put two gals up against one another and have YOU, the reader, pick vote which is hotter! What better way to get things kicked off than the very two ladies we think of when we say Tool Time! All the way from the hit TV show Home Improvement, this week it's:
Debbe Dunning (Heidi)! VS. Pamela Anderson (Lisa)
Who swung the hammer better?
VOTE BELOW!
CELEBRITY TWITTER-A-GO-GO!
Where's the celebrity Twitter news? It's been a quiet week as the publicist have taken back their clients! Outside the usual "Getting coffee" or "Taking a nap" nonsense, nobody was making waves this week. It's the quiet before the storm! But as we approach the New Year and with the bubbly flowing, expect Tweeting to surge.
5 THINGS ABOUT NIGELLA LAWSON YOU DIDN'T KNOW!
She may be the most asked about, most requested, and the most beloved woman on the 5 & 1! Seriously, before a few weeks ago I barely knew who she was. I have all you to thank for bringing her some shine. I've already approached her people to get an interview. Until then, let's get to know Nigella Lawson a little better, shall we?
1. Lawson originally worked in publishing, taking a job under publisher, Naim Attallah. 2. She's written for The Daily Telegraph, The Evening Standard, The Observer, and penned a food column for Vogue and a makeup column for The Times Magazine, as well as working for Gourmet, and Bon Appetit. 3. It was revealed by leaked Whitehall documents in 2003 that Lawson declined an OBE from Queen Elizabeth II in 2001. As the daughter of a life peer, Nigella is entitled to the courtesy title of "The Honourable" and is thus styled The Hon. Nigella Lawson. However she does not use this courtesy title. 4. In one of her newspaper articles she has shown a liberal attitude to sexuality ("most [women] simply have, somewhere, a fantasy about having sex, in a non-defining, non-exclusive way, with other women"). 5. Lawson caused major controversy and was featured in various newspapers for publicly advocating wearing fur. Lawson also remarked that she would love to kill a bear and then wear it.
And now you know...
She's was #3 on the Hot list last week. Who came in first?
Right here!
VIDEO-O-GO-GO
Let's get a little holiday spirit in the 5 & 1! From my favorite Christmas special of all time! And you would know that if you read last weeks Top 5! This is one million times better than Bad Santa.
Alright, let's get to the actual Hollywood 5 & 1. I go through 5 things out of Hollywood this past week that made me scratch my head plus our "& 1" Model of the Week! Let's go!
TOP 10 CELEBRITY HEADLINES OF 2009! Part 2 of 2!
It was another wild year for Hollywood! Filled with the usual dose of births, deaths, marriages, and divorces. Here's part two of what captured our attention the most and captivated tabloids in 2009! If you missed the first part you can still catch up here.
The Top 5!
5. Carrie Prejean is no Miss Congeniality!
It was the response heard around the world when Carrie Prejean answered Perez Hilton's question about gay marriage. Miss California didn't miss a beat and became an instant celebrity. For better or worse. From there she made the rounds, sitting in her cloud of judgment, passing out life lessons (100 Cool Points if you can name that reference!), painting a target on her back. Then the closet door opened and the skeletons came pouring out. Some risque photos here. Some bikini shots there. Lawsuits rose up only to be dropped. Then the videos followed. Imaginations ran wild and the web is still anxiously awaiting the leaked proof that Miss Prejean enjoys her private time. Intensely.
4. Weight Watching!
This is tabloid lifeblood! From Jennifer Love Hewiitt to Jessica Simpson, the headlines were quick to pounce when some unflattering shots came out. What is "fat" now-a-days-anyways? Showing that the minds of the impressionable girls mean nothing, magazines were quick to point out and and every flaw in a famous personality. I always know it's a slow news week when I see the weight headlines at the check out counter.
3. The People Hate Jon and Kate Jon and Kate Gosselin. What a pair these two made. And now it's all falling apart. Let this be a lesson to you folks out there who want to have a bunch of kids and put all the shenanigans on reality television. Sadly, this lesson won't be learned. What is worth studying is the fascination for Jon and Kate Gosselin's deteriorating marriage. And how their true character has come out. Her being a shrill harpy and him being a lame douche. Give it about 15 years and the kids are going to have their own show chronicling their stints in rehab. Thanks Jon and Kate!
2. Sex Tapes! Get Your Sex Tapes Here!
What a year it was for perverts! You had Tila Tequila, Jennifer Lopez, Rhianna, Shauna Sand, Jenna Lewis, Carrie Prejean, Carmen Electra, Eric Dane, Rebecca Gayheart, Leighton Meester...Ok, that one was ruled a fake. But it seemed every other week a "discovered" sex tape was being leaked online. Years ago this would have been career suicide, now it's almost a token of honor and a door to a new level of fame. Where have you gone Audrey Hepburn?
1. In Memory Of...
Yes, 2009 will be remembered as the year we started to lose our icons. While Michael Jackson's death will stand out as the most memorable, the sheer number of people who have touched us through film was high. Even the death of John Travolta's son, Jett, couldn't escape clean in the headlines with the mess that transpired. From Ed McMahon and Farrah Fawcett to Patrick Swayze and Dom Deluise, some big names passed away. While not complete, here's a small sampling of those we lost and those who will be missed.
Pat Hingle, Bob Wilkins, Patrick McGoohan, Ricardo Montalban, Bob May, Veatrice Rice, Kim Manners, John Updike, James Whitmore, Robert Quarry, Howard Zieff, Alan Landers, Sydney Earle Chaplin, Horton Foote, Charles Lewis Jr., Altovise Davis, Ron Silver, Natasha Richardson, Moultrie Patten, Maurice Jarre, Andy Hallett, Lou Perryman, Wouter Barendrecht, Jack Wrangler, Lee Madden, Marilyn Chambers, J.G. Ballard, Jack Cardiff, Ken Annakin, Kim Weiskopf, Beatrice Arthur, Danny Gans, Dom Deluise, Micky Carroll, Linda Dangcil, Blue Iris, Mark Landon, Frank Aletter, Bud Tingwell, Wayne Allwine, Lucy Gordon, Michael Ross, Don Edmonds, David Carradine, Shih Kien, Del Monroe, Johnny Palermo, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, Billy Mays, Fred Travelena, Alberto Jiménez, Alejandro Jiménez, Karl Malden, Harve Presnell, Mollie Sugden, Judi Ann Mason, Walter Cronkite, Les Lye, Clayton Hill, Harry Alan Towers, Naomi Sims, Blake Snyder, Budd Schulberg, Reiko Ôhara, John Hughes, Don Hewitt, Ryan Jenkins, Dominick Dunne, Shing Fui-On, Adam Goldstein, Larry Gelbart, Paul Bruke, Patrick Swayze, Troy Kennedy-Martin, Frank Deasy, Dick Durock, Robert Ginty, Barry Letts, Veronika Neugebauer, Al Martino, Lou Albano, Victor Mizzy, Joseph Wiseman, Soupy Sales, Joe Maross, Paul Wendkos, Ken Ober, Jocelyn Quivrin, Dennis Cole, Edward Woodward.
My sincere thanks to these individuals. Be it large or small, they had a hand in entertaining us.
Tiger Style!
It seems just when the story can't get any stranger, Tiger finds a way. Seriously, this tangled web is crazy and everyday brings a new revelation. Make sure you stay tuned to 411mania to up-to-date on the wild and wacky world of Tiger Woods! One of the biggest madams in the country told TMZ two of Tiger Woods' alleged mistresses are high-end escorts, she has tax forms to prove it. Michelle Braun, Madam if you're a John, recently pled guilty to money laundering and sending a prostitute over state lines says she used Global Travel Network (GTN) as a front to pay her escorts. The documents show the two women connected to Tiger, Jamie Jungers and Holly Joy Sampson (Mom and dad must be so proud!), allegedly received payment from the GTN company. Is Tiger the new Charlie Sheen?
Woods' British lawyers have obtained a court order from the High Court in London, prohibiting British publications from publishing any nude photos and videos of Tiger. That's not a good sign. The lawyers sent a letter to multiple UK papers and blogs, stating the court order "prevents the publication of private and confidential information contained in the Order...this Order is not to be taken as any admission that any such photographs exist, and in the event they do exist they may have been fabricated, altered, manipulated and/or changed to create the false appearance and impression that they are nude photographs of our client." Lawyer speak for "JUST IN CASE". The court order also covers any possible videos. It blocks the publication of "any photographs, footage or images taken or obtained of the claimant [Tiger] naked or any naked parts of the claimant's [Tiger's] body or of him involved in any sexual activity." The lawyer's letter says, "Our client is not aware of any images and in any event he would not have consented to any such photographs being taken nor would he have consented to the dissemination or exploitation of the same."
So, anyone hear any good Tiger jokes? Please share below!
Team Tiger...ASSEMBLE!
Hilton Shocker! Nicky Hilton's stolen laptop will not result in another "leaked" Hilton sex tape, sources close to the heiress say the missing computer was 100% scandal free. Burglars hit Nicky's Hollywood Hills home Tuesday and made off with a computer and an expensive Lalique crystal. But Nicky only used the computer that was taken for business, not pleasure, and there's nothing stored on the machine that could get her in trouble...like naked pictures, secret diaries, Paris's medical records. This has got to be a first. I wonder if Paris is disappointed in her sister. This would have been totally great for Nicky's career.
The other Hilton sister. The one with a little self respect.
Jon Gosselin DENIED.
A Maryland judge decided that TLC's breach of contract case against Jon Gosselin was strong enough to put a preliminary injunction in place, which forces Jon to abide by TLC's rules or else! Yeah! The smacketh down cometh! That means no more interviews or appearances without TLC's permission. TLC honcho Edward Sabin testified against Jon today, saying his recent actions, like hosting a pool party in Vegas, taking his girlfriend to France, and talking to paps outside of his home, have been "embarrassing." Embarrassing for ALL of us! A rep for TLC said, "The Court has validated our view that Mr. Gosselin has a valid, binding contract and that he has breached it repeatedly...we look forward to the next phase of the litigation, which is to pursue our claim for damages resulting from Mr. Gosselin's numerous breaches." Life keeps a tab, my friend. Everyone pays.
I'm not wasting another picture on Jon! Here's another picture of Nigella instead!
Chris Brown Gets Slammed.
Not really Hollywood news, but I'll let it pass. Chris Brown spent several minutes promoting his new album on the Wake Up Show on Seattle's KUBE 93, when the topic turned to Rihanna. Brown deflected the first question saying, "I'm really done talking about the whole situation...I'm just moving forward." But the DJ wasn't done yet and blurted out, "F**k that, did Rihanna throw you under the bus or what?" Before Brown could even respond, his handler told the DJ, "alright guys" and hangs up on the station. Sorry Chrissy. Just because you you think you're done, when you beat someone like you did, it's going to hang around a while. Sorry if it's a problem with your career. Maybe next time think before you hit.
I'm running this just because..
Welcome back to the & 1 Model of the Week! Where we search this thing called the internet to find a lovely lady to appreciate in all her beauty.
Week 16 of the & 1 Model of the Week brings us...Shannyn Sossamon! She is an actress, musician, dancer, DJ, and former model. Fun little fact about her: After going through several auditions, Sossamon beat out Kate Hudson for the role of 'Lady Jocelyn' and landed the lead female role in the movie A Knight's Tale opposite Heath Ledger.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present...Shannyn Sossamon!
If anyone knows how to get in touch with her, drop me an email.
Stop back next week for another & 1 Model of the Week!
Before I say GOODBYE!
I would be remiss if I didn't mention some of the other OUTSTANDING articles on www.411mania.com. You would be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't peep around the site. I always get my daily habit of reading. Here's a small sample!
Finally, if you have some down time and are looking for a great place for great fun, check out Tiger Flash Games!
Do you have something to say? A celebrity story? Juicy gossip? Shoot me an email at stevethegoose@gmail.com. Thanks again and be safe out there. And just chill...till the next episode...
When not writing for www.411mania.com, Steve Gustafson is still writing the Big Screen Bulletin as you read this.
All pictures courtesy of www.people.com, TMZ.com, www.cnn.com, and www.imdb.com. Thanks to L.A. Correspondent Dash Seavers.
Re: VS I gotta go with Debbe Dunning, when I see a pic of Pamela all I think of is disease. And Tommys big wang. Both thoughts leave me feeling awful.
Posted By: Guest#6060 (Guest) on December 11, 2009 at 11:37 PM
Goose I don't know who the fuck Jenna von Oÿ is but keep coming up with the pics. She's hot with a nice, fat butt. Also your column was adequate lol
Posted By: paco smith (Guest) on December 11, 2009 at 11:42 PM
Tiger should join Amway, as they also screw anything that moves. Amway is a scam, and here's why: Amway wants to pay out as little money as they can get away with, so they support the higher level IBOs ripping off their downline via the tool scam. As a result, about 99% of IBOs operate at a net loss, while the top 1% make several TIMES more from their Amway tool scam than from the Amway products. Read about it on my blog, I suggest you start here: http://tiny.cc/D5oJh and forward the information to everyone you know, so they don't get scammed.
Posted By: Tex (Guest) on December 11, 2009 at 11:57 PM
Tex sir you are a dipshit
Posted By: Guest#4150 (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 02:23 AM
Well, if we are going for Tool Time era of each, then my vote is for Pamela Anderson. She was cute as a button back then.
And, thank you for putting both Bud Tingwell and Les Lye on your In Memoriam list. Both men had a very big effect on me in the day.
Posted By: Shane (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 05:35 AM
Debbie Dunning definately.
Posted By: guest (mike) (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 05:43 AM
Oy, indeed!
Posted By: Q:? (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 06:18 AM
Shit! I forgot how hot Pam Anderson was before she became a nightmare of plastic surgery.
Posted By: Q:? (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 06:25 AM
Lawson is a lesbian Palin! Concerning Tiger, I still say he needs to change his name to "Tiger's Wood".
Posted By: The Great Capt. Smooth (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 09:35 AM
First, all the Nigella love = EPIC WIN! When I saw that first pic I almost couldn't scroll down any further, but then came the reward... more classy, mouth watering, gorgeous Nigella.
For the VS I pick Pamela Anderson, on the condition that we're basing it on how she looked at that point in time. She was amazingly pretty before morphing into a porn star stereotype appearance.
Jenna von Oy is insanely hot. I had such a thing for her in the Blossom days and couldn't believe Joey wasn't into her. For those who are interested I've seen her on a show called The Parkers, assuming it's still on the air. She seems to be the token white cast member, and with that rump it's no mystery why they cast her. More Jenna would be great, as long as it doesn't squeeze out more pics of The Honourable Ms. Lawson.
Posted By: Jason Douglas (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 10:46 AM
Also going with Debbe Dunning, for pretty much the same reason as Guest#6060.
Kudos on the Shannyn Sossamon pics, also - I've been smitten with her since seeing A Knight's Tale.
Posted By: Wyatt Beougher (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 11:05 AM
Debbe Dunning all the way. She was so beautiful, not slutty. And she still is beautiful, not slutty. Or diseased. Or suffering Elephantitis of the vaginal lips.
Posted By: wow... (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 11:50 AM
"sitting in her cloud of judgment, passing out life lessons"- Always Sunny in Philadelphia
These 100 cool points will cancel out the ones I lost for seeing Twilight
Posted By: Nick (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 02:17 PM
Debbe Dunning, Pamela Anderson, Jenna von Oy, Megan Fox, Rihanna...who gives a shit? Nigella fucking Lawson owns them all. Now THAT is a woman.
Posted By: Zingy (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 05:01 PM
What's the difference between a golf ball and a car? Tiger Woods can drive a golf ball 400 yards.
One of Tiger's mistresses came forward and said Tiger gave her an STD. When pressed for further details she admitted it was "the golf clap."
what's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa stops after three Ho's.
We're learning more about the moments leading up to Tiger Woods' car crash. Apparently his wife flew into a rage when she found out she got a golf club for Christmas, but Tiger's girlfriends each got pearl necklaces.
What's the difference between Cirque du Soleil and Tiger Woods' mistresses? --Cirque du Soleil is a cunning array of stunts...
Posted By: Bahb (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 05:31 PM
Some of you made me spit my Yoo Hoo on my monitor.
@Paco Smith, while my column was adequate, you never fail to entertain! Always good to see your name attached to a comment.
@Tex, nice swerve! I never thought I'd get an anti-Amway rant in my feedback. You're the first!
@Shane, you're welcome. Even with everyone I included, I know I missed plenty who should have been in there. It was a tough year.
@Nick, WINNER! I can't tell you how it warmed my heart to see someone get that. Congrats my man!
@Bahb, hahaha! YES! I'm swiping those jokes and passing them on! Thanks!
Debbe Dunning easily wins this round of VS! The Nigella Lawson love is still HUGE! Who saw that coming? Great stuff this week! Thanks for reading! No joke. Now, let me get back to this PPV!
Posted By: stevethegoose (Registered) on December 12, 2009 at 09:20 PM
Let's not forget Erin Andrews. It WAS a great year for pervs
Posted By: GeeSpotter (Guest) on December 12, 2009 at 10:23 PM
jenna von oy "kills time" singing country music.. if you check on youtube u might see a couple of video of hers in morning news shows plugging either a live show or albums.
Posted By: AK_G (Guest) on December 13, 2009 at 10:09 AM
paul newman died this year.
Posted By: nick* (Guest) on December 13, 2009 at 11:58 AM
no, really though, this chris brown/rihanna thing is over... she pimped the situation for her album and didnt even do a good job, everybody knows she was innocent that night thus prompting him to beat that ass, and no i'm not defending him but let his wack-ass album do the talking, he's at least doin the gentlemanly thing and not throwing her under the bus
Posted By: Guest#1727 (Guest) on December 13, 2009 at 05:59 PM
You're right Nick. If by this year you mean September 26, 2008.
C'mon!
Posted By: stevethegoose (Registered) on December 13, 2009 at 06:35 PM
What's the difference between a golf ball and an Escalade? Tiger can drive a golf ball 300 yards. Haw haw.
Tiger as the next Charlie Sheen? He could only hope so. Charlie wound up redeeming himself and had a later resurgence in his career. Same with Robert Downey Jr. (who I've always rooted for). So I think Tiger will try to quietly bide his time until things have calmed down.. probably divorce.. and then get back out there on the course. Although the first return will do major ratings, I'd wager.
Nigella = WIN!
Jenna Von Oy? Mmmm... I always wished I was Joey Lawrence so I could nail the crap outta her.
Definitely Debbie Dunning as the hottest Tool Time Girl. Pam is hot, but Debbie is slammin'.
In memoriam: Soupy Sales died? How the hell did I not know that?!
Jon & Kate: I hate them both.. but mostly, I feel really bad for the kids. As you said, they'll definitely have their own TLC series in about 5 years to document their counseling.
Nicky Hilton sex tape? Man, that would be one that I'd actually WANT to see. Unfortunately, I'll just go back to One Night in Chy...er, I mean.. Big Trouble in Little China.
Great column this week again.. now time to pop over to BSB.
Posted By: Zero (Guest) on December 13, 2009 at 11:38 PM
Showing that the minds of the impressionable girls mean nothing, magazines were quick to point out and and every flaw in a famous personality
Im sorry but you are wrong. paparazzi shots are PERFECT for impressionable young girls who think that these starlets are perfect when its actually the 15,000$ makeup artists and the Photoshop pros who make them look perfect.
Sure, the chubby girl is going to get hurt seeing someone with a small bulge making fun off but if that girl is in school, then the damage is already done.
As an educator and someone who has many nieces I know very well how young girls are marketed to by the entertainment and fashion biz. You have to explain to them plastic surgery and its prevalence, you have to show them before and after makeup shots and show them what photoshop wiz like glennferon.com do for the magazines. And even when you explain them the deceit and the lies of showbiz, they are still impressionable children.
One of my nieces saw a picture of a makeup less Cameron Diaz with her horrible skin, wide mouth like a bass and felt much better about herself because she has bad skin too.
That picture of Diaz did more for that girls self image than any words could do and it was because that picture destroyed the image of perfection that girls are sold. You may know these things and you may tell kids these things but seeing a flawed person instead of a perfect one is so much more powerful.
In a way, that's a lot like we men feel towards Tiger. No matter how much of a lying cheating bastard we can be at time, we can all say (in unison everyone) "At least Im not as bad as Tiger".
Other people's problems help us feel good about our own.
its human nature.
Posted By: leo laporte (Guest) on January 02, 2010 at 01:34 AM
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