The Gratuitous B-Movie Column 7.18.11 Issue #165: Night of the Demons

Posted by Bryan Kristopowitz on 07.18.2011

In this issue I take a look at the Night of the Demons remake, plus the usual stuff (a new B-Movie Babe is named, a new Douchebag of the Week is crowned, some stuff to look for this week, NASCAR and Indycar stuff). Check it out.

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Issue #165: Night of the Demons (2009)


Hello, everyone, and welcome once again to the internets movie review column that's glad last week is over, The Gratuitous B-Movie Column, and I am your host Bryan Kristopowitz. In this issue, issue number one hundred and sixty-five, I take a look at 2009's Night of the Demons, a remake of a classic 1980's horror flick of the same name which was, I believe, supposed to get a major theatrical release but didn't for whatever reason. It's a dang shame because the movie, directed by Adam Gierasch, would have been a blast to see on the big screen.

Night of the Demons (2009)



I've never seen the original Night of the Demons or either of its two sequels, Night of the Demons 2 (1994) or Night of the Demons III (1997), so I really had no expectations going into the remake. I certainly knew of them as their video boxes were always on the shelf in the horror section of the old video store, and I knew about the original movie's reputation (it was incredibly bloody but the MPAA cut the movie to ribbons), but for whatever reason I never rented any of them. In retrospect it was a stupid decision because I feel as though I missed out on something important. It also would have helped me compare the remake to the original, which is what everyone does when a remake comes out. Of course, how the hell was I or anyone else supposed to know that twenty years ago? There were other movies there to rent, you know, like Lair of the White Worm and Near Dark and Chopping Mall. Damn, I probably should have rented Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge when I had the chance back then, too. That's never on TV anymore, and it isn't on an easily available DVD. What the hell, man?

So anyway, the Night of the Demons remake stars the great Shannon Elizabeth as Angela, a hip and edgy New Orleans professional party organizer (I'm assuming that's her job) who has put together a big Halloween party at the famous/infamous Broussard mansion. The Broussard mansion was the site of the mysterious hanging death of Evangeline Broussard (Tatyana Kanavka), a well known old story in New Orleans. Angela's friends Maddie (Monica Keena), Lily (Diora Baird) and Suzanne (Bobbi Sue Luther) are all going to the party because it's the thing to do. Maddie's ex-boyfriend Colin (Edward Furlong) is also at the party, dealing drugs and generally being a douchebag. Lily's ex-boyfriend Dex (Michael Copon) shows up, too, along with his buddy Jason (John F. Beach). Everyone's having a blast, talking and drinking and dancing and doing and selling drugs and whatnot, but the cops show up and shut the party down because Angela didn't get the proper permits to hold a party (something about the admission price. If Angela didn't charge people to come she wouldn't have needed a permit). Everyone but Angela leaves the house, but when Maddie and Lily realize that Suzanne is missing they go back to the house to look for her. Dex and Jason go back, too. Even Colin goes back to the house (he hid some drugs in the house when the cops showed up). They all meet up with Angela and start looking for Suzanne. They eventually end up in the basement where they find a bunch of skeletons half buried in the ground.

Instead of just looking at the skeletons, freaking out about having skeletons in the basement, and maybe taking a picture of the skeletons, Angela and the group start fucking around with them. The one Angela touches bites her after she tries to remove its gold tooth. Of course, a skeleton shouldn't be able to bite someone because, you know, it's a skeleton, but that bite leads to some pretty nasty stuff. Everyone tries to leave the mansion but there's only one exit and it's blocked, so they all decide to stay the night and figure out their next move in the morning. To pass the time they play spin the bottle, engage in some mild homophobia, and have sex with one another. And that's when the pretty nasty stuff starts to happen.

Demon city.

The rest of the movie plays out pretty much like you'd expect it to. More demons show up, people die, and we find out what the heck is actually going on. The last forty minutes or so are a superb gory romp that will make you stand up and cheer. I know I cheered. I did it at home, sure, but it was no less necessary. The ending is also a notch above the usual ending we get with these kinds of movies. Yes, there are sequel possibilities present, but the movie comes off as a somewhat contained, satisfying experience, which is usually not the case when there's a plausible chance of a sequel. Kudos to everyone involved.

The demon special make-up effects are all excellent. Every demon looks nasty and comes off as something you would never want to run into. Even the bald demons come off well. There's a fair amount of CGI present throughout the movie but it isn't as obvious as it could have been. How often do you see that? Gierasch and company deserve serious praise from horror movie fandom the world over. The world over.

The soundtrack is also pretty dang decent. It's one of the best heavy metal horror movie soundtracks I think I've ever heard.

The performances are all top notch. Shannon Elizabeth is great as Angela, both in human form and in demon form. As we all saw during the first American Pie movie, Elizabeth is willing to do whatever it takes to make her character work and memorable, and she does the same essential thing here except she goes whole horror hog. She could have a second iconic role on her hands here. Monica Keena is awesome as Maddie, the smart girl with the nifty costume. Diora Baird and Bobbie Sue Luther also do great work as Lily and Suzanne (nudity, blood, and one of the nastiest cell phone bits ever committed to film). Michael Copon and John F. Beach get a cool opening bit where they stand up for the little guy, and they also handle themselves well during a, for the lack of a better word, awkward moment towards the middle of the movie. You'll laugh, you'll cringe, and then you'll laugh again. That's what I did.

And then there's Edward Furlong as Colin the douchebag drug dealer. You don't like him when you first see him, but you start to warm up to him when you realize he's the only one who understands on a basic level what the heck is going on and what they need to do (they all need to get the fuck out of there). Easily one of Furlong's best performances.

I loved this flick, and I hope that we get a sequel at some point. I'd love to see Shannon Elizabeth back in the demon make-up being evil and killing people and whatnot. She's very, very good at it.

Now, onto seeing the original movie and it's two sequels. It's about freaking time I did that.

See the Night of the Demons remake as soon as you can. Buy it, rent it, search for it on TV. See it, see it, see it.

So what do we have here?


Dead bodies: About 10


Explosions: None.


Nudity?: Oh, yeah.


Doobage: 1925 montage, suicide, decapitation, yellow eyes, a very sexy Halloween costume, a potential chafing situation, a discussion about whether or not women should "shave down there," pot smoking, paint balling a punk kid, a strip club with a naked bartender, a Russian guy that gets blown while doing business, a hot lesbian make out session, a guy dressed up like the puppet from the Saw movies, a massive party, ghost hand through a mirror, a big ass mosh pit, ass grabbing, skeletons in the basement, bullshit about black magic, multiple flashbacks, more pot smoking, a hot lesbian kiss, man on man action, glass bottle licking, some serious "doggie style" sex, worm attack, maggot attack, tentacle attack, a sexy lesbian dance, a skinless face, fireplace poker through the gut, shotgun hooey, hacksaw hooey, shotgun blast to the head, machete to the leg, a metal pipe beat down, a safe room, bullshit about how demons hate rust, a demon orgy montage, a wooden board with rusty nails, a bathtub full of goo, a room attack, a nasty leg wound, rusty nail bullets, some very cool shotgun stuff, and a very nifty ending.


Kim Richards?: None.


Gratuitous: Flashback to 1925, New Orleans, hanging, sexy Halloween costumes, pot smoking, Edward Furlong, Shannon Elizabeth, hot lesbian make out sessions, pain in the ass cops, Edward Furlong smoking, funny homophobia, demon transformations, worms, maggots, and tentacles, one of the most disgusting booby-cell phone-vagina sequences ever put on film, big tits, shotgun hooey, weird beard occult hooey, stuff about rust, and demon attacks.


Best lines: "Halloween is supposed to be scary," "No costume no candy motherfucker!," "You worked at Taco Bell? That is awesome!," "Are you a liar or are you an idiot?," "What is this, the night of the exes?," "God, she is going to be sick," "Dude, what the fuck's wrong with you?," "Hey, guys, there are bodies in the basement!," "I guess we're going to be spending the night," "Oh, come on, it's not a skeleton bite," "Seven. Perfect," "Congratulations, you are officially gay," "So, you're a good kisser. You have no idea," "Fix my whispers," "She stuck a lipstick in her boob and fell out her pussy, okay?," "Holy fucking crap!," "So we're the only thing standing between them and the end of the world?," "Oh shit up, bitch," "Oh, shit, I'm awake, I'm awake," "You know, I think that thing wanted to fuck me," "Come and get me motherfuckers!," and "Demons, hmmm. Not so smart."


Rating: 9.5/10.0




***

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column: The Facebook Page!





Please check out The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Facebook page, which can be seen here. It just started so there's not much there at the moment. But, as time goes by, expect to see daily questions and musings and other B-movie hooey. And it would be cool if you "liked" it, too.

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Facebook page! Yeah!


***

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column B-Movie Theme of the Week

Enjoy.






***

And now, the weekly Fearnet update- It's back on Time Warner!



Yes, that's right. Fearnet, the only free all horror/thriller On Demand TV network is back on Time Warner cable after a two year hiatus. Uncut, uncensored horror flicks from the past and present are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week, any time you freaking want them. Fearnet the On Demand TV station also has behind-the-scenes stuff, trailers, and other cool hooey for you to check out, so if you have it, what the heck are you waiting for? Go check it out now!

And if you're really lucky, like I am, you may also have access to Fearnet the TV channel, which airs horror movies pretty much twenty-four hours a day (I believe there is a block of infomercials in the morning). The movies do have "commercial breaks" in them, similar to the breaks that currently appear on IFC, but the movies are uncut (blood and boobs and cursing are all intact). This channel also exists in HD, which is pretty nifty if you care about that kind of thing. Me? I can't tell the difference.

Now, if you don't have Fearnet on your cable/satellite service or don't own a TV you can still check out all that Fearnet has to offer by checking out its website, fearnet.com. Free movies, interviews, news, behind-the-scenes junk, it's all on there, with new movies loaded several times a week. The 1980's horror classic The Gate is on the site right now. Are they still there? Check and see).





And be sure to watch Post Mortem with Mick Garris, a nifty interview show where big, fat Stephen King's favorite director talks with genre legends like John Carpenter, Wes Craven, William Friedkin, and more.

If you're a Facebook nerd you can check out the Fearnet fans Facebook page, which can be seen here. There are plenty of people out there interested in Fearnet. Come join them. And, as always, thanks to both Mark Lindsey and Mathew Hirsch for info regarding the Fearnet fan movement.

Fearnet is back on Time Warner cable! Freaking awesome!





***
The Gratuitous B-Movie Column B-Movie Babe of the Week: Mila Kunis









***

Things to Watch Out For This Week



- Jericho Season 3: Civil War Graphic Novel Trade Paperback out July 20th: The first six issues of this awesome, awesome comic book, published by the fine folks at IDW Publishing, will be out in graphic novel trade paperback form this Wednesday. If you haven't been reading the book in its normal single issue format the graphic novel is a great way to check out what's been done and to get up to speed before the next regular issue hits comic book store shelves, which I imagine will be sooner rather than later.

I thought that the book was only going to be a six issue sort of miniseries type deal, but apparently it's going to be an ongoing thing, at least for a little while. And that's damn cool. If you don't know where your local comic book shop is located, check out http://www.comicshoplocator.com/ to find out and then get there to pick up the first six issues of Jericho Season 3: Civil War. It's worth it.

Long live Jericho!




- Hobo with a Shotgun on DVD: This low budget Rutger Hauer flick was actually released on DVD and Blu-ray disc two weeks ago, but I thought I'd mention it here anyway just in case you didn't know and didn't get a chance to see it in theatres or on Video On Demand. I know I didn't get a chance to see it in either format (I have a hard time paying ten bucks for a movie on pay-per-view). It looks great, though. Rest assured that once I get my hands on a copy of it the movie will get a full on review in this here column. I know you all can't wait for that.

You can go here to buy a copy of the movie or you can go to your local Best Buy or some place like that to get a copy. They should have it. Maybe.





- Dead Heat on Encore Action this Saturday!: Well, late Friday/early Saturday (4:45 am est to be exact). This great Treat Williams/Joe Piscopo/Vincent Price/Darren McGavin action horror comedy directed by Mark Goldblatt from 1988 is set to air on the Encore Action channel, and if you haven't seen it yet you really need to check it out. It's chock full of weird creatures, weird jokes, and weird performances from everyone. Williams is nothing short of brilliant as Roger Mortis, a cop brought back from the dead to figure out who the heck killed him, and Piscopo is pretty dang funny throughout. Price is awesome, and McGavin is a bastard. Again, if you haven't seen this movie before you really need to check it out. It's worth it. So, if you have the Encore Action channel be sure to set your DVR or your VCR for early Saturday at 4:45am.

Or you can stay up all night and wait for it to come on. There's nothing wrong with doing that.



***

The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Douchebag of the Week






This week, The Gratuitous B-Movie Column Douchebag of the Week goes to Rupert Murdoch, for allowing the News of the World phone hacking scandal to happen and then making it sound like he didn't know what was going on. Please. Murdoch, who has claimed several times that, despite his vast international TV business and movie studio ownership, he's still a "newspaperman at heart," may end up having all sorts of "legal" cover to keep him from going to jail (he's certainly got enough "insulation" from devoted employees), but there's absolutely no question he knew what was happening and that he condoned it. This shit has been going on since at least 2003. How the hell could he not know?

And isn't it great how the media entities Murdoch owns in this country, The New York Post, The Wall Street Journal, and the Fox News channel, have essentially ignored this story? Even when it was revealed that Murdoch's people may have tried to hack the phones of the families of 9/11 victims it wasn't front page news for the Post, it wasn't a major topic of discussion on "Fox & Friends," and Bill O'Reilly didn't demand that his boss come clean. Yeah, the American people can trust those motherfuckers.

Fair and balanced! Fair and balanced! Fair and balanced!



For Christ's fucking sake.




Up next is Herman Cain, former CEO of Godfather's Pizza and current candidate for the 2012 Republican Presidential nomination, for saying that communities should have the right to ban mosques if they so choose because "Islam is both a religion and a set of laws." Cain is apparently afraid that "Sharia Law," which is what Islam is all about according to Cain, is going to pop up as the supreme law of the land at some point in the near future and then we're all doomed. He never really explains how that's going to happen or why it would happen, but that's not really the point to begin with. Cain is trying to scrounge up as many ultra right wing crazy votes as he can get, and he likely figures going completely crazy is the way to go here. Sadly, it'll probably work for him (and anyone else on the Republican side that decides to follow suit. Newt Gingrich and Rick "Man on Dog Sex" Santorum we're all looking at you).

Check out this article for all of the gory details. Makes you proud to be an American, doesn't it?





And finally there's the Universe, for deciding to take my dog Mikey away from me. Mikey, who was just a few weeks short of being eight years old, had never been sick a day in his life until last Sunday when he started throwing up. The next morning he had a fever and had trouble breathing. The vet held him for two nights, ran a bunch of tests, took a bunch of x-rays, did an ultrasound and couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. A specialist of some sort of was contacted but he, too, couldn't figure out what the heck was wrong. Mikey's fever got worse and worse to the point where he couldn't eat, couldn't drink, and could barely move around. Then his liver started to fail. Within three days my buddy Mikey went from being my pal to a hopeless case. He was "put down" (God I hate that phrase) Wednesday afternoon.

And, boy, did that fucking suck. It still fucking sucks. And it's going to fucking suck for the next I don't know how long, perhaps ever. So, thanks, Universe, for killing my dog. Go fuck yourself.

***

NASCAR and Indycar thoughts



The NASCAR Sprint Cup race at New Hampshire was a bit better than usual, with Ryan Newman picking up his first win of the season. He started on the pole, led a bunch of laps, then sort of dropped back, engaged in some pit strategy, saved some fuel, and then showed up at the end to lead the last segment. His teammate and car owner Tony Stewart, who started second, finished second. Stewart also engaged in some pit strategy and fuel conservation to get to the end, and it actually worked out for him (it didn't work out for him last fall at New Hampshire). I was shocked that both Newman and Stewart made it to the end. I was sure they were both going to run out of fuel. I know they weren't supposed to, that they both saved "enough," but how many times have teams figured out they saved enough only to be off two laps or so at the end?

Kyle Busch had a bad day. He got into it several times with Jimmie Johnson in the early going, then cut a tire and hit the wall. Busch won Saturday's Nationwide race, which was his 100th NASCAR win, so I expected him to be a little better than he was. Both Juan Pablo Montoya and Marcos Ambrose were in the thick of it most of the day, running up towards the front and battling for the lead. Ambrose held on for a ninth place finish at the end, while Montoya ran out of gas with like two laps ago and ended up 30th (Montoya's teammate Jamie McMurray suffered the same fate, running up towards the front at the end of the race only to run out of gas with a handful of laps to go).

Denny Hamlin pulled a third place finish out of his ass. I have no idea how he managed to get back to the front, especially after that spin on the backstretch. Jeff Gordon had a bad day but managed to pull off an eleventh place finish. Jimmie Johnson ended up fifth, despite several mistakes in the pits. How often does that happen? Bobby Labonte had a good day, finishing 7th.

The Sprint Cup series is off this week but will be back in action on July 31st at Indianapolis for the Brickyard 400. The Nationwide and Craftsman Trucks Series are both in action this week, though, at Nashville Motor Speedway. The Trucks race on Friday and the Nationwide Series will race on Saturday. Kyle Busch will no doubt be in action both nights, trying to pick up NASCAR wins 101 and 102. If that happens be prepared for more endless discussion on whether or not Busch's win total across NASCAR's three top series should count as one number or three separate numbers. I don't know if I'm in the minority on this or not but I think Busch's overall win total is legitimate and should count as one number. I know Kyle Petty is upset with the idea of Busch surpassing his father Richard Petty's 200 win record by racing in three series instead of just the one that "the King" raced in, but if it happens it happens. Records get broken all of the time. Deal with it. But, hey, that's just me.




Over in the IZOD Indycar Series, lots of people are saying that the overall season championship is essentially over. Dario Franchitti has a 55 point lead over second place Will Power with eight races left in the season. That's a big deficit to overcome, especially when you consider that Franchitti isn't likely to make many big mistakes in any of the last eight races. Power is going to have to win at least half of those races, with good finishes (top 3) in the rest to have a chance (that's if Franchitti runs into a huge streak of bad luck). There should be some good jockeying for position from spots 3-10 for the rest of the season. Scott Dixon is currently in third, but with Marco Andretti, Tony Kanaan, and others looking to break out, don't be surprised if third place changes.

The Edmonton street race is up next, this Sunday afternoon. That race will no doubt blow. New Hampshire is only four weeks away. As I said last issue, I can't freaking wait for that race. Can't wait.

Here's Will Power in all of his pissed off glory last week at Toronto. Awesome, awesome stuff.





Loved that bit about Ganassi.

***


Well, I think that'll be about it for this issue. B-movies rule, always remember that.

If there's anything you want to see reviewed here in this column, feel free to offer a comment below or send me an e-mail. I'm always on the lookout for new stuff to watch.

And don't forget to bookmark 411 via the little line below. You'll be glad you did.

Night of the Demons

Shannon Elizabeth- Angela
Monica Keena- Maddie
John F. Beach- Jason
Michael Copon- Dex
Diora Baird- Lily
Bobbi Sue Luther- Suzanne
Edward Furlong- Colin
Tatyana Kanavka- Evangeline Broussard
Jamie Harris- Nigel
Linnea Quigley- Ballerina Lady

Directed by Adam Gierasch
Screenplay by Jace Anderson and Adam Gierasch, based on an earlier screenplay by Joe Augustyn

Distributed by Entertainment One and Seven Arts Pictures

Rated R for bloody horror violence/gore and language throughout, some sexuality, nudity and drug use
Runtime- 93 minutes

Buy it here