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Movies/TV's 3R’s 11.22.11: Dark Knight Rises, The Amazing Spider-Man, Twilight, Ricky Gervais, More
Posted by Porfirio Diaz on 11.22.2011

Welcome to Week 125 of The 3 R's for the Movie/TV world.

Make sure to click the Facebook "Like", Tweet button, and Google +1 links over there to the right of the article! Support 411mania, your home for the best in pop culture entertainment news.

Without any further ado, here is...

  • HIT$ Part 1: More minted Dark Knight Rises pictures: Every time I post Dark Knight Rises pictures, I receive a large check in the mail. Granted it's non-negotiable, stamped with something called "VOID" in bold red letters, and in place of the dollar amount is "$MANYHITSSS!!" ("I don't think real checks have exclamation points") but as far as sentimental value goes, it's worth a lot to me. Not much more than 1/4th of a cent but hey, shut up.

    Anyway, here's some more cool DKR pictorial updates.

    Okay, that is one cool looking Internet magazine cover

    Additional note of interest about Bane's mask (from costume designer Lindy Hemming): "He was injured early in his story. He's suffering from pain and he needs gas to survive. He cannot survive the pain without the mask. The pipes from the mask go back along his jawline and feed into the thing at the back where there are two canisters of what ever it is... the anesthetic."

    Maybe he shouldn't have worn the mask too tightly the first time around. Not proper gentlemen manners.

    Sure you didn't beat up those guys Batman. You just happened to find them on the ground unconscious

    Everyone, Harvey Dent and I would like to announce that we are friends

    Aw yeah! We're about to have a good old fashion bro down.

  • HIT$ Part 2: More minted Amazing Spider-Man pictures: At this point I can clearly state the year 2011 has been a milestone for set pictures and videos from blockbuster hits. The Amazing Spider-Man is no different and the world is happier for it. Not only does Andrew Garfield get in on the action but so do Rhys Ifans, Denis Leary, and the lovely Emma Stone.

    Wash with different soap, repeat until cleanse. (Don't mind me, just look at the pictures below)

    This is what Rorschach would look like if he joined the red-and-white nWo and was given 10% more attitude

    "Uh… it was a ghost… and his ectoplasm! Did you see the ghost?"

    Want a fine couple. I give it one more movie before the eventual break up

    Pictured: the world's greatest hanging wedgie

    SIGNIFICANT UPDATE: Just came over the wire Monday night. What you saw above now in video motion:

  • South Park renewal for three more years you guys!: South Park first debuted on August 13, 1997. With news of their latest renewal, South Park can enjoy another three years of TV mayhem, which will account for nearly a full decade, as the edgiest satire show on television.

    It's been on for that long? I feel old. Very much happy, but old.

    Cable's longest-running animated series South Park is headed for the 20-season mark. Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the creators of the no-holds-barred animated comedy, have closed a new deal with Comedy Central for three more seasons of South Park. The pact will keep the series on through 2016, extending its run to 20 seasons. Parker and Stone will continue to write, direct and edit every episode of South Park, as they have since the series' premiere in 1997. - Deadline

    When it comes to attacking certain stories, Matt and Trey are absolutely daring. Only they have the testicular fortitude to take a current event like the Penn State scandal and make it shamefully hilarious. Were they trying to make fun of Penn State or were they to make fun of people who make Penn State jokes? Eh, who cares because hilarious! (That's how you do a sketch SNL) For a show once feared would be put by the wayside in flavor of the duo's outside projects, this can only be a good thing. But at worst it will remind people to remind other people that South Park had gone downhill somewhere back in Season "XX". That's fine. Totally fine. It's only fair for me to say that South Park is one of cable's best television shows and Season 15 was one of their best seasons to date. But I am a horribly bias person and thought the History Channel Thanksgiving episode was brilliantly witty.

    You know what this blurb needs? A supercut of Penn State jokes. Why not? I like to have fun here. We're having fun here aren't we? (Crap, now I'm doing it)

  • Dexter also renewed for two more years: Alright. Another show with a potty mouth receives the renewal treatment, as it's been granted an additional two years. That's two more seasons of Michael C. Hall almost getting caught but never really getting caught.

    fter lengthy negotiations, Showtime has closed a new two-year deal with Dexter star Michael C. Hall. With him locked in, the pay cable network has renewed its flagship series for 2 more seasons, bringing the its run to 8 seasons. Each season will consist of 12 episodes, with production on Season 7 slated to begin next year in Los Angeles. - Deadline

    But every good thing must come to an end and for Dexter the end is soon.

    The 3-year trajectory includes the current sixth season and the upcoming Seasons 7 and 8. Does it mean that Dexter will end after eight seasons? "I'm not going to say with absolute certainty that this is the end, but that is the likely scenario, that the series is moving towards a definite end," Nevins said. - Deadline

    Dexter has infuriated fans as of late with its clumsy stories and repetitive formula. Even I have found myself going "meh" and skipping a season's worth of episodes – those of you still watching can contribute your feelings in the comment section but from what I heard, the latest season is a snooze - in flavor of DVR South Park night. Yeah, the show has overstayed its welcome but now that we see the light at the end of the tunnel, maybe it's about time to jump back on the Dexter bandwagon and enjoy the pleasant murder-inducing ride to the end. Then ice cream. Ice cream for everyone.

  • Ricky Gervais back to host the Golden Globes aka the only reason ever to watch the Golden Globes: Remember when the Hollywood Foreign Press Association was supposedly mad at Gervais for his sharp wit – as in severely poking fun at the HFPA until their nostrils flared smoke – at last year's Golden Globes event? Apparently all has been forgiven; hugs, kisses were exchanged, and concluded with Ricky Gervais back as their illustrious award host. Which is nice because you can't say "we need you back so we can be important again Ricky Gervais!" without saying Ricky Gervais.

    With all the controversy surrounding the Oscars this year, it's easy to forget all the controversy that surrounded the Golden Globes at the beginning of this year. Gervais insulted Hollywood's finest. Hollywood's finest got angry. (Or had a great sense of humor about it and appeared on the comedian's HBO show, Life's Too Short.) This years' ceremony is bound to draw more eyes, eager to witness some uncomfortable schadenfreude at the Beverly Hilton Hotel ballroom.

    But Gervais has an interesting choice to make: For the 2012 Globes, should he go easy on those waiting to accept awards? Or should he take his humor one step further and really bring the nasty? On the one hand, Gervais could be wise to rehab his relationship with the HFPA and viewers — remember, not everyone watching at home was pleased with his below-the-belt appearance this year. But on the other hand, those who reveled in his ability to take down an over-celebrated group of wealthy and beautiful individuals will be expecting an even more candid Gervais next year. They'd be disappointed with anything but Gervais' worst. - Website

    Gervais should treat the Golden Globes like the Internet and just lash out at everyone. He'll be the most famous troll ever to host an award show since Norm Macdonald hosted the 1998 ESPYs.

    /my excuse to post relevant Norm Macdonald monolog

  • Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 made like a bunch of money; Internet implodes: Over there is a Twilight pillow. It has a hint of vampire fairy dust. Now watch over millions of people lick it. Sometimes more than once. That's pretty much what happened over the weekend.

    The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 dominated the box office in a surprise to no one this weekend. The first part of the final chapter of the franchise grossed $139.5 million to claim the #1 spot, a number that places it as the fifth-highest film opening of all-time and the second-highest of the year behind Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. The film averaged $34,351 out of 4,061 theaters. The film also grossed $144 million overseas over the weekend for a worldwide total of $283.5 million. The movie had a $110 million budget. - 411mania

    The film also raked in $30.3 million at the opening midnight showing. That alone can be enough to feed an entire country or purchase several diamond encrusted office chairs. Whatever Stephanie Meyer feels like doing with her money. Anyway, people sure do love their Twilight.

    The comment section for the above 411 news link ranges from spiteful hate to spiteful triumphant. Actually there is no range. Only side A and side B. There is no variation, no middle ground. Either you're on the side of Twilight satisfaction or the side of mean spirited gratification. While not as bad as the ongoing Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 user based "0 or 10" rating phenomenon, you still receive a curious view through two sides of the looking glass.

    As for me, I find the whole Twilight spectacle ridiculous. Camping out and standing in line for days in cold weather to see a movie about sparkling vampires doing the sex bop is ridiculous. I mean just look at these pictures from Buzzfeed. Doesn't that look depressing? Bella is ridiculous. Edward is ridiculous. The fact that I know he bits pillows is ridiculous. So why isn't this blurb down one more notch below?

    I am an Internet cynic. Worse is I have a column. Much worse is I have never seen any of the movies. But give someone like me the floor and I will type out stuff like "over 700 fans wait in line for vampire movie oh won't someone please think of the starving cats at home alone meow." But I also understand the power of interest. If you like the movie, the books, the posters, this website, then all the more power to you. Do not let someone like me (or 90% of the column's core audience) ruin what you consider to be an enjoyable experience. Just keep in mind it won't stop the rest from trying. Because Twilight, to put it bluntly, blows, you see. Also, this website from examiner which contains 7 fan quotes heard at Twilight premiere.

    Now if you excuse me, I have to plan out my Black Friday midnight-to-9am shopping strategy. Many heads will roll and many savings will be had.

  • Not on NBC midseason schedule: Community: Do you like good television? Too bad because Community is nowhere to be found on the NBC midseason schedule. New episodes of 30 Rock will air in its place at 8pm. However, Whitney is on there, despite earning lower ratings than Community. So… umm… riot time? No, not yet anyway.

    But "Community" has essentially been on a kamikaze mission for a long time now, going up against "The Big Bang Theory" and one of "American Idol" or "The X Factor" for a while now. It aired after "The Office" briefly at the start of its first season and has had to go it alone ever since. "Whitney," which gets to stay on the schedule - albeit swapping timeslots with "Up All Night" - has done better entirely because of that "Office" lead-in, and has been bleeding viewers almost as quickly as it's been arousing critical pans. "Community" is a mess ratings-wise, but it's one of NBC's few shows that still draws largely unabashed love from critics (and from its shrinking but passionate group of fans). Pulling it off the schedule temporarily given the ratings is understandable; pulling it off the schedule while leaving "Whitney" on is not. Either show is going to do the same pathetic numbers on Wednesdays at 8 - away from its "Office" cocoon, "Whitney" could easily do worse than "Community" would - and one move at least buys continued goodwill from the press and viewers, whereas there's no one outside the immediate families of Whitney Cummings and Chris D'Elia who will be happy that show continues to air, week after week.

    "Community" isn't canceled. There will still be a bunch of episodes to air for the rest of this season, and while I try to look at the show as living on borrowed time - it's somewhat miraculous we'll be getting around 70 episodes, mimimum, of such an idiosyncratic, brilliant comedy - given the way NBC's fortunes have gone lately, I can easily see the new product failing so utterly that NBC pulls a "Chuck" and decides to stick with a known, albeit small, audience for a beloved show. (It also may help that "Community" is produced by Sony, which jumped through hoops to get FOX to keep making "Til Death" episodes for the syndication money a few years back.) - The Hollywood Reporter

    Eh? Eh. Sounds reasonable but I am not what I call the ear of reason. I may not know much about network schedule practices but the chances of Community beyond 2012 are low if they didn't bother to put it up there with *ugh* Whitney.

    Alright, I guess I'll start on this side and on the count of three, we flip over this car. Okay, one… two…

  • NBC orders Munsters pilot: Last year, NBC ordered a rebooted Munsters from Bryan Fuller. He created Pushing Daisies you know. Last week, NBC ordered a rebooted Munsters from the same Bryan Fuller for a second time. So… huh?

    TV's original American horror story is taking another step toward returning to primetime: NBC has ordered a pilot of Bryan Fuller's remake of the classic TV show The Munsters.

    The new version of the half-hour sitcom is bring re-imagined by the Pushing Daises creator as an hour-long series exploring how the monster house came about, and will have a darker and less campy feel than the black-and-white original. - Entertainment Weekly

    Look, whatever. The show is going to get made and we are going to put up with another gritty monster show because all the Vampire Diaries and True Blood in the world need competition. Makes me think whether anyone has pondered the idea of a sitcom de-boot. How about Hollywood gives a show like Vampire Diaries a fresh 1970s Leave it to Beaver campy makeover? Wouldn't it be the coolest? Well? Wouldn't it?

    Oh, and I should point out that the Munsters has already been rebooted once before in the late 1980s, failed miserably, lessons not learned.

  • Kristen Stewart offered supporting role in Akira *shoots Internet, shoots Internet many, many times*

    Keira Knightley has been touted as a possibility to play one of the important supporting (female) roles in Akira for the last couple of weeks. However, according to a new report from Twitch, that part has now been offered to none other than Twilight leading lady Kristen Stewart.

    There's no polite way to put it: hating on Stewart has become almost a pastime for the anti-Twilight crowd (really, you think? *loads gun once more*). It does not matter that she has actually delivered decent performances in films like Panic Room, Into the Wild, The Yellow Handkerchief, Welcome to the Rileys, Adventureland, and The Runaways – or that Stewart is next trying her hand at portraying a more engaging female character in the upcoming Snow White and the Huntsman – a lot of moviegoers seem incapable of separating the actress from her polarizing Bella Swan screen persona.

    That's all to say: bringing Stewart onboard for Akira is bound to incite angry responses and do little to nothing to win over this project's detractors. All the same, she does possesses some quality acting chops and could easily suffice in a supporting part like the one she's up for here. Besides, the possibility of Stewart playing "the girlfriend" is the least of this film's concerns… - Screen Rant

    Eh, maybe. Maybe she'll do alright. Then again, much more fun to blind hate stuff.

    *continues shooting Internet*

  • On a very serious note, let's join together to stop very horrible Internet censorship bill: Sorry to distract you from movie and television news for a moment but this piece of news will threaten the very existence of the Internet as we know it.

    In case you haven't heard, Congress has a bill in place – the PROTECT-IP Act and the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA) – that will allow government, corporations, and the entertainment industry to censor the Internet over infringing links, copyright material, and foreign sites. The bill was made to combat piracy and protect the interests of Hollywood, which is a well-intended goal, but in reality undermines the real issue: to allow corporate powers-to-be the ability to block and shut down any domain names of web sites that is a host to any linked copyright material.

    Every day sites like Facebook, Twitter, and even this very website will be greatly impacted by SOPA. Did you like the videos I posted here in the past? How about 411mania's "Video of the Day" posts? Do you like to post linked articles or other user-generated content on social media sites? If the bill passes, then you can kiss all of it goodbye. (UPDATE: As I was told, 411mania will not be affected since they do not upload unauthorized copyright material but as far as all 411 columns are concerned, it's still a gray area. What the future holds remains to be seen.). All Internet users will be infected as well. If you post anything that's even remotely piracy-related - a copyrighted image on your Facebook page or several Dark Knight Rises set pictures – then it's the dreaded ban hammer for you.

    This is about as much as I could understand. It could be more endangering than what I'm telling you here but I'm not one of legal mind. Plus I hate political talk. If anyone wants to contribute their wise knowledge, then by all means do so. All I know is it craps too much on the concept of Internet fair use and that's not very cool. Sites like Lifehacker and BoingBoing have more information than I could provide here so pay them a visit and read up on the possibility of a grim future. Tumblr and the American Censorship Day website have set up ways to get you involved in denying this act to pass through. In addition, you can view the video below for a more visual friendly channel.

    I like to think Movies/TV 3R's as an alternative to Monday night and Tuesday morning blues but the act will take the fun of producing a usually quality column piece and that will suck for everyone. 411 commenter Darth Mortis put it best, "This bill will put the US right in league with countries like China, Saudi Arabia, and Iran." So call or e-mail your state representatives and let them know Congress is a stupid head. Then tell them this bill unconscionably sucks.

  • The Annoying Orange is ready to *#&@^%& annoy you on television: Have you seen The Annoying Orange on YouTube? It's idiotic, creepy as hell – seriously who thought putting human eyes and lips on fruit would be a keen idea? - and HOLY AWFUL ORANGE PUNS it has over two million subscribers? And Cartoon Network acquired the rights for a half-hour animated series?!

    Cartoon Network has acquired the rights to popular YouTube series The Annoying Orange for a half-hour animated series to premiere in 2012 as part of the cable network's original programming block. Co-created by Dane Boedigheimer, creator of the original Web series, and Tom Sheppard (Pinky and the Brain), The Annoying Orange TV series will feature online series' signature character — an orange with a human mouth and eyes heckling other characters, mostly other fruits and vegetables. Orange, along with his band of buddies, including Pear, Passion Fruit, Apple, Marshmallow and his nemesis Grapefruit, will travel through time in a magical fruit cart. - Deadline

    Here's one of the videos in questions. I lasted 15 seconds. I forced myself to watch the whole mess in its entirety a second time. Good news, I now have a hole in my monitor.

    I understand this bizarre series is best geared towards the appetite of children. I'm not going to sit here and pretend like I know their best interests. But isn't there like a VHS copy of Inspector Gadget or The Electric Company that kids could get attached to? Really, any little thing would do: a walk in a park, backyard sports, and fun time with power tools. Just suggestions.

  • Geek Love, a nerd dating reality show, is making its way to TLC: This don't know if this qualifies as official "ridiculous" news or "really ridiculous" news but admittedly I am intrigued. A reality show where sci-fi fanatics dressed in costumes tries to engage love at warp speed ("warp speed dating?") in already socially awkward places like Comic-Con? Sure why not. Let me just get my blow up doll Nurse Constance Gertrude out of the closet and ask for her opinion.

    TLC may have hit upon another big idea: Geek dating reality show.

    The network has ordered Geek Love, a project that follows a speed-dating service at nerd-drawing events like Comic-Con. TLC greenlit two half-hour specials that will air next month and plans to make the project a full-fledged series if the specials draw large enough ratings.
    - Entertainment Weekly

    Yeah, okay, so the show sounds like it'll hit the stereotype on all cylinders but come on! It'll be like Jersey Shore if Jersey Shore majored in computer engineering. And if Revenge of the Nerds taught us anything, it's that clicks dig guys who pretend they're someone else while wearing masks.

  • There's a special place in Hell reserved for the inventor of crotchless panties for kids: I know this column is all about national news but I like to throw in a pinch of local flavor every now and then. Besides, if it's good enough for the Huffington Post, then it's good enough for this column. With that said, here's a story about an outraged Colorado mom outraged to learn about a store selling some outrageous crotchless panties. For kids. Ha ha ha. Those silly designer stores and their inappropriate kid wear.

  • So last week I made the cardinal sin of mistaking MMA legend Randy Couture for man legend Chuck Norris. Mistaken identity was had and corrected by use of the edit button. At least all of you were generous to my farsighted plight.

    Porfirio Diaz GO BY SOME GLASSES !!

    Thats Randy Couture not Chuck Old man Norris ! - Posted By: Guest#8951 (Guest)

    Yup. Generous indeed. Extended thanks to the rest who pointed out the blunder. Negative points for me.

    I don't think so. What am I gonna watch instead? The Big Bang Theory? What about that one with Doogie Houser where he plays a straight guy? I don't think so.

    I'll stick to Jersey Shore. Don't forget, first week of January, Season 5 starts! - Posted By: MBD (Guest)

    Jersey Shore fits in with the Twilight blurb as well. So you watch Jersey Shore to your heart's content MBD. Let the heart of Jersey flow right nest right into your brain.

    And yes, I too am aware of the premiere and I will watch.

    Thats Mr Norris on the last pick. Look at the eyes.
    An Asteroid movie... why the heck not. - Posted By: APrince66 (Guest)

    I don't even know anymore. :(

    Looks like Chuck to me.

    Didn't think the SNL PSU skit was funny but it sure did describe my thought process following the story. Perhaps that makes me the Devil. I've been called worse. Apparently my commenting name suggests that. As for Rattner, who hasn't slept with someone and forget about it or at least tried to forget about it. I'm in both camps there.

    Don't think Kristen Stewart is hotter than Charlize Theron but I'm 40. The movie looks like it might be entertaining though. I think I have a man-crush on Hemsworth right now. I thought Thor was way better than it had any right to be. Can't wait for the Avengers! - Posted By: The Big Fat F*g (Guest)

    I think if I had a voice of reason, I would want you to be that voice.

    Ouch, buddy. (Hey, I said probably not true)

    I actually liked that SNL skit. But I'm weird like that.

    Batman intro was pretty cute.

    While Billy Crystal is a good host, I'd would have rather have had the Muppets, just to see how they would pull it off. It worked for RAW! - Posted By: JLAJRC (Guest)

    I think there's an article lurking around the Internet on why it's not a good idea to have the Muppets host and that you should knock it off.

    Oh, here it is.

    here's another mistake that really disgraceful. There is no John Cena in this soon to be shitty movie, it's the man himself, Jean-Claude Van Damage!!! - Posted By: jcvd (Guest)

    Actually I saw it as "this is what John Cena would look like if he was over the age of 50" but after mistaken Norris for Couture, I just don't know anymore.

    Last word: So I went to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra concert on Saturday. It. Was. Amazing. The music, the blinding lights, the lasers, everything. So yeah, I liked it. Fun fact: favorite songs: "Carol of the Bells" and "Wizards in Winter".

    Have a safe Thanksgiving holiday and/or Black Friday everyone. Remember, dark meat is your friend.




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