TV Rants & Raves 01.11.12 : New Year's Glee

Posted by Mike Gorman on 01.11.2012

Rants and raves on the eventual return of Community, the recent Glee graduation news, the Food Network perpetuating the careers of Rachael Ray & Guy Fieri, NBC's surprise hit Grimm and more!


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Do not adjust your screen, your eyes are not deceiving you. Your usual host, Ben Piper, is still on a much deserved hiatus but he will be back next week! In the meantime, I am here to treat you to a fill in rant or two this week. I never realized how good it feels to let your feathers get a bit ruffled. So thanks for that, Ben!

TV Rants and Raves



Are you watching the Food Network's latest trainwreck Rachel Vs. Guy Celebrity Cook Off? Well if you're not, please don't start. I would seriously hate for them to think that this is a venture that needs to continue.

It is the latest in the Food Net's string of inane cooking competition shows. Now don't get me wrong, I love me some Chopped and I can even get on board with a little Worst Cooks In America but for the most part I find the contest shows to feel way too scripted and just are not that interesting. I think their basic lack of actually well prepared food to probably be a huge factor in this determination.

This time around however, the terrible cooking is not at the biggest issue. It is the two buffoons helming the series. Rachel Ray and Guy Fieri are loved by millions and this makes me intensely ill. Ray is a solid cook who turned a great concept (30 Minute Meals) into an empire, with some help from Oprah of course, but somehow along the way became more of a cartoon character known for way too cutesy catch phrases and no so much for her food mastery any more. Fieri is a truly polarizing figure himself who comes off as a screeching, bleach blond, backwards sun glasses wearing freak show. He has the best job in America in my opinion. He gets to drive around (well probably fly actually) and visit amazing little eateries bringing some light to the real food renaissance happening in America. Instead of presenting himself as genuinely interested in the food at hand he comes off as a circus clown… well, that is not fair to circus clowns.

Yet somehow these two are popular enough to warrant continued headlining statuses across the world of food tv. This time around they get to shepherd a flock of D-Listers, well E-Lister celebs as they repeatedly tell us what great cooks they are yet come across as bumbling fools hamming it up for the camera. The show follows the same boring formula of every food competition show of late, Main Challenge + Elimination Challenge = The Show. Perhaps if they shook that up a bit the outcome could be a bit more palatable. Also, Taylor Dayne and Joey Fatone are the best they could dig up for this trainwreck? And don't get me started on Lou Diamond Phillips new desire to be called "LDP" as an actual thing. Please join me in changing the channel so that this cannot actually happen.




Call me a hopefully idiot but I am still a fan of Glee even after the way too gimmicky, disappointing second season. I feel like the show has started to find its feet again in the third season with a return to stories that focus more on character development and songs that tie into the story instead of building plotlines so that songs can be shoehorned into the series. I will not say that the season has been perfect, especially when it comes to fitting in the winners of the Glee Project reality series but it has been progressing in a much more positive fashion of late in my opinion.

That said, there is something huge looming in the distance this spring and that is graduation for many of the series central characters. They are seniors with big aspirations so it is a topic that cannot be avoided and it is one that the show's creators have said will indeed be addressed come season's end. How that will happen has been the focus of much discussion these past few months with several theories being bandied about as to how the show will handle or not handle the departure of prominent characters like Finn, Rachel and Kurt. One theory that has had legs up until this week was the creation of a spin off featuring Rachel and Kurt fulfilling their NYC dreams together. This week the show's producers have finally come forward, and on Twitter no less, to say that graduation will happen, there will be no spin off, but something "cool" is planned to make it all work.

"Cool"? Really? I am finding that hard to believe. If anything I think they really do not know where the show will go yet. My greatest worry as a fan is that they will graduate these characters and then find convenient ways to keep them at the high school. I worry that Finn will settle in as the Assistant Coach of the Football team. And what about Rachel and Kurt? Well why don't we have them start up a separate drama department at McKinley. Voila! They all get to hang around, grow older and become creep hanger-ons. But you say there are other seniors? Here I think there will be two possible outcomes. One they hope we all forget that some characters were labeled as seniors already or they will feasibly try to convince us that Brittany, Santana and Puck failed senior year and must repeat it. Let's throw Quinn into that mix too. Now that I mention it, it could actually be a bit funny if it is revealed that the three girls who are cheerleaders and Glee club members spent so much time rehearsing for both and serving as Sue Sylvester's henchmen that they skipped many classes and simply failed.

I almost wish they would dive head first into the absurdity of the show and just let everyone stay seniors forever. I don't think this is a series that is crying out for continuity and a base in reality. Keep it light and fun, with some heavy production values. I think that could be pulled off to some success with continuing winks and nods to their perpetual youth. Regardless of where the seniors are headed I will say I am on the hook when it comes to anticipating the results.




Community is definitely coming back! I suppose we never were actually told that NBC had permanently pulled this fantastic, smart series but then they had never tried that hard to deny the accusations that such a thing was happening. This discussion is being cleared up, somewhat, this week as NBC's Entertainment President Robert Greenblatt noted in an interview that it was never their intention to imply that low performing series was gone for good. He stated that pulling the show was more a decision based on trying to figure out the midseason arrangement for the network as they had shows set to return and something had to go.

Greenblatt did however codify his statements of support for the series with a nod to the fact that he is not sure of the series will return next Fall with a new season. I am extremely heartened by this news though as I feel like Community is the Thursday night comedy that many people might not know they want but they certainly need. It does not dumb down its high concept comedy and builds layers that I feel like many current sitcoms just don't even attempt. Community will take an idea and build a solid episode around it, such as the paint ball wars, the zombie apocalypse, and the ubiquitous animated Holiday special.

These "gimmicky" episodes would fall flat on any other series but here they shine due to the show's incredibly solid writing and detailed attention to character development. Community has a heart as big as the well done family focused Modern Family but it just shows it in different ways. I hope that once the show does return, fans will rally around it and give it the support it deserves to get it another season. Like many great NBC series, ie. Parks and Rec and the returning 30 Rock, I think that Community is taking its time to find its true voice on the sitcome playing field and that with some needed time will prove itself to really be as solid as many fans already believe it to be.




Wait, did I just say that 30 Rock is coming back?? Heck yes I did! Rejoice fans, this Thursday night we will finally have Liz, Jack, Tracy and crew back where they belong. They have been much missed. That is all.




My final "rant" tonight is a definite "rave." I cannot express enough how much I believe you should be watching NBC's new series Grimm. Specifically, if you are a fan of Buffy The Vampire Slayer check out this new entry in the supernatural hero genre that is based in the mythology of the Brothers Grimm Fairy Tales.

It is focused on a Portland, OR police detective who discovers that he is a part of a long line of hunters who track down the magical creatures from the fairy tale world who are up to no good. He is a Grimm. If the idea of mystical destiny does sound familiar, fear not because this is not a simple rehash of show's like Buffy. It is a fresh take that is quickly building a solid mythology from, which they will be able to mine many interesting stories and foster some seriously interesting mysteries. It does not hurt that there are some graduates from the Whedonverse involved in the creation of the show. Their presence is clearly helping this show find balance between the propensity to gravitate towards a "monster of the week" format while building up some truly great character development.

We are six or seven episodes into the season and there are still many core mysteries to the series that have not been resolved since their introduction in the series pilot. What is fantastic about Grimm is that this is not coming off as stalling or boring, but instead is really presenting itself as a natural progression.

Take my advice, check this one out. It is the perfect fusion of a police drama with some familiar story elements that will draw you back to your childhood in a fun and interesting way.



Strange Thoughts

Is anyone out there actually purchasing Jane Seymour's weird "Open Heart" jewelry collection from Kay Jewelers? I for one seriously hope that she is not as involved with the creation of these overly simple, ugly designs as the commercials portray her to be. Also, "Open Heart" as a name, really? Way too medical for me!

I am finding myself kind of obsessed with the tragically Caucasian rappers in the Hyundai Holidays commercials. They have a vibe that is just damn catchy.

I literally just heard someone refer to Tim Tebow as "Tim Teblow" this week. I admit I am late to getting onboard this one, but I don't care. I like it. He will fall to Brady this Saturday. Mark my words.

I am not sure who put them up to it but color me impressed by the recent upgrades to the bacon at both Wendy's and Burger King. C'mon, if you know me you knew I would squeeze some bacon in here somewhere!

On a related note, in reviewing what I currently have stored on my 75% full DVR, I realize that I watch way too much Food Network and Cooking Channel. I guess it is true what they say, it is indeed porn for fat people, or at least this fat guy. Ha!

As if you did not have enough ammunition to judge me with yet, let me just get it out there. I am a Christmas lover and I am so not ready for it to go away yet. I will acquiesce to convention and take my tree down soon… but I will not be happy about it.

Did we ever find out who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Seriously. Did we?


Who Tweeted What?

Tis the season to reflect on 2011, so this week I will give you my five top picks from the best celebrity tweets of 2011.


Steve Martin: @SteveMartinToGo "If you can ‘pray the gay away,' can you ‘pray the gay onto someone'?

Good question Steve!

Danny Zuker: @DannyZucker "Oh, god. What did you do to her? RT @ChrisBrown Please pray for Virginia."

I lol'd, really.

Adam Levine: @AdamLevine "Dear Fox News, don't play our music on your fucking evil channel ever again. Thank you."

At least he was polite there at the end.

Pink: @Pink "Out of Myself, Britney and Christina – didn't everyone think I was gonna be the troublemaker? Look ma!! No cuffs!!"

Did Pink just purposefully compare herself to Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera? Good on her, I suppose!

Patton Oswalt: @PattonOswalt "Not to panic anyone in NYC, but a screaming John Cusack just drove by in a limo that was missing a door."

Gotta love Patton for making a joke out a truly terrible film, that actually works.

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The Non TV Segment Of The Week

I talked a lot about Glee this week and I am going to come back around to it this week leaving you with a few of my favorite performances by Naya Rivera, who plays Santana on the show. Her voice is spectacular in my opinion. So I suppose I am breaking the "Non TV" rule here but since Ben is away, what's he gonna do?? Enjoy!

Pardon the translated lyrics on this one…



This one gives you a little Gwyneth Paltrow too!



And lastly, this is my favorite performance on the show itself to this point and Naya rocks this mash up:




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And just like that it is over. Wasn't too painful was it? I hope not! I had fun stepping into Ben's shoes for the week but we all know it will be great to have him back soon. Peace out all, don't forget to catch the Patriots bringing the pain to the Broncos this Saturday night!! (Sorry Ben, had to do it again!)


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