411 Fact or Fiction Movies 04.08.06: Week 31
Posted by Tim O'Sullivan on 04.08.2006
JT and Rutherford talk The Simpsons movie, the new Bond, Clerks 2, plus more, in week 31 of Fact or Fiction...
Week 31 boys and girls, and you don't want to miss this one. It's a riot.
A day late, and I am blaming Scott Rutherford. He apologises……..profusely.
This week's fierce competitors are Superman and Boogeyman's biggest fan, JT, and the guy who can go from legend to bell end in 0 - 2.5 seconds………..ladies and gents, it's Scott Rutherford. Let's get amongst it.
Play:
1. Paul Giamatti signing up to do a Christmas comedy with Vince Vaughn indicates that we may actually have a genuinely good festive movie at the end of the year
JT
FACT: Holiday flicks tend to be either hit or miss, but I think that if anyone can make a hit, it's these two. I don't have complete details on the story but the one line synopsis doesn't sound too bad either. Vince Vaughn rarely makes a bad flick, and Paul Giamatti has been outstanding in his role for years know. Another thing that it will have going for it is that it's a Christmas movie at Christmas time, so we're not expecting Oscar worthy performances. This will be nothing more than something to catch at the flick while you're on break. If one can keep that in mind, this movie will be enjoyable.
Ruther (The Bitch)
FICTION: One of my pet movie hates is defining a movie by release time. What's even worse is defining a movie by who's in it. This movie will either be good or it will be bad and it will have fuck all to do with being released at Christmas or the fact it has two funny actors in it.
2. The trailer for the forthcoming Simpsons movie was released last week, and people got excited and stuff. However, you would be surprised if the end product turned out better than the South Park movie
(Host's note: Being the ardent Superman fan that he is, JT got a nudge paranoid about this question, and subsequently believed the words "South Park" to in fact be "Superman." With that in mind, this was the nutter's fella's initial response. Following that is his official answer to the question:)
Are you kidding me O'Sullivan? Although, I may be a bit biased due to my complete obsession with Superman. Still though, Superman fans have been waiting for this for years. There was a reason it took so long for this movie to get made; that reason being to have all the right pieces to the puzzle. Bryan Singer has treated this like his baby, and has shown on numerous occasions he has exactly what it takes to tell a superheroes story. The producer of this film Jon peters produced Ali, With Honors, This Boys Life (classic), Batman, Gorillas in the Mist, Rainman, as well as many others; so I'm not to concerned with putting this in his hand. While I was a bit disappointed to learn Kevin Smith wouldn't be penning this, the little bit of a *version* of the Michael Dougherty script seemed promising to me. Then of course you have the cast. Kevin Spacey can play anyone, so he'll be fabulous as Luthor; Bosworth is a bit unproven but should do fine, and Frank Langella seems born to play Perry White. This primarily leaves Brandon Routh in question, but casting for the part of Superman has always been successful when it comes to a relatively unknown actor (Reeves, Cain, Welling). I can't even believe I had to spend this long defending this movie!? This movie will be the one of the top five highest grossing superhero films of all time, and it will kick serious amounts of ass....
JT
FACT: It's just too little, too late. I will admit that when I saw the South Park movie in a theatre the first time, I really didn't enjoy it; I just flat out thought it went an hour and ten minutes longer than it should. But I over time have realized I was entirely too stuck in "30 minute" mode, and now consider the South Park movie a classic. The fact is The Simpsons should have pulled the trigger on this five years ago at their heights. While South Park continues to get better, The Simpsons continues to get worse. I mean, where can they really go with the movie that won't resemble two or three rehashed episodes? I suppose they get to cuss, but that won't bring anything new to the characters. I suppose there's an outside chance they'll manage to somehow recapture their magic on a cinematic level, but I doubt it.
Ruther (The Bitch)
FICTION: Sure the Simpsons are past it but I do believe they have it in them to make a really funny movie and they have one huge advantage over what South Park can and could do…make it adult. South Park has always been South Park, The Simpsons have always had to be more family friendly because it is a network show. I for one would love to hear Homer in the bedroom screaming to Marge "Call Me Flanders" and we pan in to see him banging away on Marge with a moustache and glasses on.
3. Despite signing himself up to yet another ropey looking comedy, Christopher Walken has done enough awesome stuff to not be critically punished for taking big paychecks for average movies
JT
FACT: I mean, are you kidding? It's Christopher F'N Walken. I think the man has gotten to the point where he can do whatever in the fuck he wants and nobody has the right to say shit about it. In fact, I wish he'd do more of this type of stuff, because as Saturday Night Live has shown us, Walken is comedic gold. Even in the films that weren't blockbuster hits (Envy, America's Sweethearts, Joe Dirt), he owned the role. He was even good in only semi-comedic roles (Suicide Kings, Pulp Fiction). The bottom line is his acting should NEVER be questioned, and if he wants to take some silly roles in the moonlight of his career, then more power to him. The man is a movie icon.
Ruther (The Bitch)
FACT: Well I wont point out the fact that Walken has been taking paychecks for years **cough**Blast From The Past**cough**…….why would I mind now?
Will Smith says, "Ruther. Stop being a koala fondling moody gonk." Will Smith also says, "SWITCH"
4. Daniel Craig is getting too much shit for a role / performance that hasn't even been shown on the silver screen yet
Ruther (The Bitch)
FICTION: Craig David deserves every last morsel of hate and bile he gets. This is punishment for all those shitty songs I've had to endure for the past ten years. The only thing worse than Craig David is a Craig David fan and thankfully they are starting to disappear. Hopefully one day we will mention them in the same breath as the Dodo.
JT
FACT: Ummm... Rutherford good buddy, slowly and carefully, put the fucking bottle down. Read it again. Daniel Craig. D-A-N-I-E-L- -C-R-A-I-G; you know, the guy tapped to play the next Bond? Fucking Aussies I swear. Anyway, it is definitely a fact. I have yet to hear a seriously legitimate reason why he shouldn't be Bond. Is it because he isn't as established as the other Bond's were? Who gives a shit? Daniel Craig has lent himself to roles that require SERIOUS acting over the years. Hell, he even won a British Independent Best Actor Award for his portrayal of a schizo in Some Voices. He trained at Guildhall School of Music and Drama. He has worked with the likes of Morgan Freeman, Tom Hanks, Cate Blanchett and Adrian Brody. He has done serious films, action films, even a couple of comedies; the perfect mixture to play the ever suave James Bond. Who cares if he's Blonde? The fact is he looks like a man who can be believable as Bond. Oh, and while we're at it, let's crucify the fact he's only the second British actor to play the BRITISH character James Bond. People need to shut the fuck up about it until they see him on the screen.
5. Jack Bauer is King. only joking..........................
(Host's note: I added this to wind Ruther up originally. This was mainly because he hates 24, Jack Bauer, and well, me for loving it. Coincidentally, he also doesn't like women, sports or beer. True story.)
Ruther (The Bitch)
LAY OFF THE FUCKING JACK BAUER YOU WANK!
JT
And for the record, Vick Mackey owns Jack Bauer... yeah, I said it... bitches.
5. Clerks 2 shouldn't be in colour
Ruther (The Bitch)
FICTION: I really hate people that don't like change. The only reason the original movie was done in B&W was budget reasons. Using colour film would have meant have to rent lights and renting lights was not possible. B&W film meant they could use the lights in the Quickstop and not much else. So it was practical not stylistic and if anyone thinks that Clerks 2 needs to be in boring B&W you need to get a fucking life. Just don't ask JT how to get a life because he's as clueless as they get :)
JT
FICTION: While budget may come into it, the fact is Kevin Smith and the whole crew have evolved, not only in this movie but in their careers as well. The B & W was one of the reasons (along with how awesome it was) that it became a cult classic, but it wasn't a major reason. Like dipshit said, everybody knew that it was for budget reasons; now that Smith has the finances (and the backing) to bring it back to life in full color, I say it's all good.
6. After Sunday's debatable mediocrity, there will be a lot more movie and TV DVD's in May's "to buy" list above the release of WrestleMania
Ruther (The Bitch)
FICTION: What fucking type of question is that? I think the host of this Fact or Fiction has been listening to way too much Craig David. Was that a question about what I thought of WrestleMania in the guise of asking about what movies I would rank above it? Well I thoroughly enjoyed WM and I'm sure I will find just as many movies this month I'll enjoy as much. The greatest joy I'll get is hiring someone to break O'Sullivan's fingers if he doesn't start asking some decent questions.
JT
FICTION: As much as I hate agreeing with this man, he's right. Also, you're forgetting one thing O'Sullivan. Bret Hart. This could have been the worst WrestleMania in the last ten years and people would still buy this for the eight and a half hours they cut out of Hart's speech. This is called "strategic marketing". But, as if ten minutes of Stone Cold rambling and forty-five of Bret saying goodbye wasn't enough, you hit the nail on the head with "debatable" mediocrity. I thought it was a fine WrestleMania, and have no issues with the fifty bucks I spent.
In agreement of 3 out of 6. Thanks to the fellas.
Wow, that was probably the most bizarre, yet entertaining one of these I have hosted thus far. It is official that Scott Rutherford is a grade A c#$t. But he is my sort of c#$t, I'll give him that……….for the entertainment factor alone. As for JT, well we usually have some harmless banter but we were in unison this time around. USA and UK vs. Australia. Only one winner.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I've enjoyed compiling it. I'm off for a long shower, because I feel dirty.
