The 411 Top 5 04.12.06: Week Four
Posted by Trevor Snyder on 04.12.2006
The Top 5 Fight Scenes.
No witty intro or banter this time, folks. Us 411 writers have some aggression to work out, so let's get right into:
THE TOP 5 FIGHT SCENES
Trevor Snyder
Honorable Mention: Christopher Lambert vs. Clancy Brown - Highlander
5) Freddy Krueger vs. Jason Vorhees - Freddy vs. Jason
4) The Burly Brawl (Keanu Reeves vs. a whole lot of Hugo Weavings) - The Matrix Reloaded
3) Jackie Chan's "Factory Fight" - Drunken Master II
2) Roddy Piper vs. Keith David - They Live
1) Michelle Yeoh vs. Ziyi Zhang - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Yes, there are a few great lightsaber fights in the Star Wars franchise. But my personal favorite sci-fi duel remains the final battle between Connor McCloud and Kurgann from the original Highlander. Two cool characters, great sword-fighting choreography, and the "there can be only one" concept added a lot of weight to it, as you really felt you were witnessing the end of a centuries long quest. Of course, the fact that the film was followed by three sequels and two TV series somewhat takes away from that. But the entire reason the frnachise lives on, even though not many are interested in it anymore, is because the first film is so cool people are generally willing to forgive the rest, and this fight is a big part of the reason why.
5 - Some horror purists complained that pitting Freddy vs. Jason was about as lame as it gets, but in reality it was simply breathing new life into a tradition that Universal started years ago when they pitted their monsters against each other in films like Frankenstein vs. The Wolf Man. The makers of Freddy vs. Jason did it right; they didn't take themselves too seriously, and they created one hell of a Wrestlemania smackdown between the two icons. Anyone who didn't mark out when the hard rock kicked in right before the fight began is dead to me. 4 – As cool as Reloaded's freeway sequence is (and it did make my Top 5 Action Scenes), my personal favorite sequence in the entire trilogy remains Neo's battle against the army of Smith's. Some have complained that the final minutes look too cartoony, and are obviously completely CGI. This is true, but then, the special effects in the original Star Wars look dated now too. In the future people will look back at this scene as a breakthrough moment in special effects. And even when the fight begins to look less realistic, the choreography is the fight is just a blast to watch. 3 – With Jackie Chan recently, and thankfully, toning down his dangerous stunts and amazing fights in favor of more comedy, it's easy to forget how breathtaking he could be in his prime. I was torn between this one and his battle against an army of thugs in a shopping mall from Police Story, but in the end I had to go with the final fight from Drunken Master II (released in the U.S. as Legend of Drunken Master). It's arguably his best film, and really, how can you top the final moments, when he downs industrial alcohol to gain even better fighting skills? 2 – There are many reasons They Live is one of the greatest cult films ever, and chief among them is the fight that never ends between Piper and David. The pure ridiculous of the scenario (the entire thing is about trying to get someone to put on a pair of sunglasses, for pete's sake) only makes it even better, as on numerous occasions you think it's finally over, but it just…keeps…going. If there was ever a better movie brawl, I haven't seen it. As a matter of fact, this was a lot better than any match Piper ever had in WWE. (Bonus points go to South Park for re-creating this fight, almost move for move, between Timmy and Jimmy in the hilarious "Cripple Fight" episode. 1 – One of the main themes of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, which in my opinion remains the best martial arts movie ever, is female empowerment. And it sure worked, because these two kick-ass women top my list. Watching Michelle Yeoh go through an entire arsenal of weapons trying to top Ziyi Zhang and the Green Destiny sword puts most male action stars to shame.
George H. Sirois
Honorable Mention: Martin Blank vs. Felix La PuBelle - Grosse Pointe Blank
5) Anakin Skywalker vs. Obi-Wan Kenobi - Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
4) Westley vs. Inigo Montoya - The Princess Bride
3) Neo vs. Agent Smith - The Matrix Revolutions
2) Rocky Balboa vs. Apollo Creed - Rocky II
1) Luke Skywalker vs. Darth Vader - Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
After recently revisiting one of the most overlooked films of the 1990's, Grosse Pointe Blank, I was really impressed with how this fight in the high school hallway was pulled off. The build to it was subtle and grew with each passing moment, and the payoff of the actual fight was tremendous. Who knew Cusack had it in him to do this? Skywalker vs. Kenobi – a duel with 28 years worth of hype – met all of its expectations and then some. Their fight was fast, it was exciting, it was ruthless, it went all over the place, and it was long. The two of them had the time to build that match until the time when "Battle of the Heroes" by John Williams started up, and then the emotions really took over. In terms of great characterization, entertainment and humor, Westley vs. Inigo Montoya is as good as it gets. We learn about these two characters as they are trying to kill each other, even though they don't really want to kill each other, since the respect they have for one another grows as the fight goes on. Neo vs. Agent Smith from The Matrix Revolutions was the perfect counter-point to the 500 Smiths vs. Neo in The Matrix Reloaded. All those Smiths just stood back and let these two men, the ones we have come to know since the beginning, just beat the hell out of each other. And Don Davis' score for this scene is one of the most powerful pieces of music in all of film. Of course, the first fight between Rocky and Apollo helped Rocky win the Oscar for Best Picture, but for sheer brutality, you can't beat the rematch in Rocky II. Apollo was all business right from the beginning, and ever since the end of Round 2, Rocky refused to fall down. It was outstanding storytelling in the ring by both men, and by the end, you're so caught up in the action, you're trying to will Rocky to his feet.
But my personal favorite has to be the first showdown between Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker in The Empire Strikes Back. We knew during the whole movie that these two would eventually meet and cross lightsabers, but we had no idea it would be this dramatic, this powerful. The historic moment when Vader cuts off Luke's hand, then declares that he is his father immediately afterwards, will live forever as a major piece of motion picture history. For my money, there's no better fight.
Arnold Furious
5) The Bride (Uma Thurman) v The Crazy 88's - Kill Bill Vol. 1.
4) Ash (Bruce Campbell) v Evil Ash (Bruce Campbell) - Army Of Darkness
3) John Nada (Roddy Piper) v Frank (Keith David) - They Live
2) Westley (Cary Elwes) v Inigo Montoya (Mandy Patinkin) - The Princess Bride
1) King Arthur (Graham Chapman) v Black Knight (John Cleese) - Monty Python & The Holy Grail
#5. I was totally blown away by the whole scene. For me it showed that Tarantino had grown up that little bit more and was capable of doing a traditional fight scene and adding a touch of his own class to it. Breaking into black & white and even silhouette was a classy touch and made you really focus on the action. Plus, Uma Thurman with a sword is ultimately more badass than pretty much anyone. "Leave your limbs you've lost. They belong to me now". #4 is almost the greatest comedy fight in cinematic history, where it not for #1. The Ash v Ash fight is one of several great little fight scenes in Army of Darkness, all of which play off Bruce Campbell's comedy genius. The fight with the witch ("Yo, she-bitch"), the scrap with the skeleton ("keep your damn dirty bones out of my mouth") and the final supermarket showdown with the undead ("hail to the king, baby") are all great, but the greatest fight is Ash's one with himself. "Goody little two shoes" before the shotgun kicks in. "I ain't that good". But it's not just that, after chopping up his opponent and burying his still animated remains he battles several mini-Ash's which is arguably even better. I heart Army of Darkness. #3 is the most pointless fight scene ever inserted into a film. Piper and David just beat the shit out of each other for about 10 minutes, all over a pair of sunglasses that Piper's character wants David's character to try on. Although it's pointless, it's tremendously well put together. It's like a really well worked wrestling match just thrown into a movie, and kept within the boundaries of reality. He's going to try on those damn sunglasses, damn it. #2 sees one of my favourite scenes in any film. Montoya is probably in my top 5 characters, ever. Probably only for the "my name is Inigo Montoya" bits, but nevertheless. The fight between him and Cary Elwes' Westley sees them both cajole and attempt to one up each other with the awesome double "I'm not left handed" reveals. And finally we have the best fight scene ever. Chapman's King Arthur going to town on the cocky Black Knight by chopping off his limbs. The Knight battles on relentlessly, claiming to have only suffered a flesh wound. "Your arms off" responds the King. It's so ridiculously stupid but the actual before the arm is severed is pretty good considering the weighty swords involved. I dig it and as far as fight scenes go I quote it more than any other. There were other close calls for the 5 including a trio of lightsabre battles that I know will get proper consideration from the other writers. Also, the best scene in Fellowship of the Ring, where Aragorn picks off the orc with an awesome spinning chop. But those are my five and I stick to them.
JT
Honorable Mention: Jackie Chan vs. Street Gang - Legend of the Drunken Master. Any man who kicks six people's asses while downing 5th's of alcohol deserves to be on my list.
5) Qui-Gon Jinn (Liam Neeson) and Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) vs. Darth Maul (Ray Park) - Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace
4) Yu Shu Lien (Michelle Yeoh) vs. Jen Lu (Ziyi Zhang) Dojo scene - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
3) Jet Li vs. "His love interests' Uncle" - Blindfolded Scene - Fist of Legend
2) Bruce Lee vs. Chuck Norris - Return of the Dragon
1) Neo (Keanu Reeves) vs. 200 Agents (Hugo Weaving) - The Matrix Reloaded
I suppose everyone has their favorite Star Wars scene, and this fight was one of my favorites. It was the first big battle that essentially started it all. Darth Maul was put over as a legit badass here, as it took two Jedi's (one a Master no less) to stop him. It was greatly choreographed, and while I enjoyed seeing Yoda kick ass in Episode II, I didn't feel it was long enough to warrant making the list. For #4, I dipped into the greatness that is Yuen Wo-Ping (who made this list three times. I am quite the fan). WO-Mano-E-WO-Mano in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon; Old School vs. New School if you will. I've always been a huge fan of Michelle Yeoh, and Ziyi Zhang plays the spoiled little bitch who can kick ass quite well. In my opinion, this was one of the best female Martial Arts scenes ever (although there is quite an impressive one in Twin Dragons). Next we had my boy Jet Li chiming in at #3. I love this man, and to be honest, there were so many that I could have used, I just picked *one* of my favorites. As he's preparing to battle the evil General, he is first tested by the Uncle of his love interest... with both of them being BLINDFOLDED. This was such an awesomely choreographed scene, and it really showed the talent of both men. If you've never seen it and you're a Jet Li fan, I suggest you do so immediately. #2 is a no brainer. It's Chuck Norris. It's Bruce Lee. Arguably two of the biggest badasses ever going toe to toe. The scary part? They'd do it to you in real life too. I'd have to imagine both men had a lot of fun shooting this, because I had a lot of fun watching it. The mystique of the Coliseum type setting only added to the greatness of this dream match. Finally, at #1 we have my favorite movie trilogy of all time, The Matrix (Reloaded). I don't know about anyone else, but I will never - and I mean NEVER - get tired of seeing him kick agent after agent after agent's ass. First it started with like ten or fifteen, then grew to thirty or fourty, and it just kept going and going, and I remember thinking, "He's Neo, but how in the HELL is he going to get out of this??? There are too many!?" Well, I was wrong. As the numbers grew, so did the ass-kickings that were being handed out. It was during this scene that you could really start believing that he was the one. The CGI was nice, but my favorite parts of that scene are all live action shots. Easily my favorite fight scene of all time.
Avery Chan
5) Tony Jaa's underground fight club debut - Ong Bak
4) Eric Roberts vs Korean guy - Best of the Best
3) Rocky vs Ivan Drago - Rocky IV
2) Jet Li vs Japanese General - Fist of Legend
1) Spiderman vs Dr. Octopus on the Subway - Spiderman 2
(5) Tony Jaa introduces his elbows and knees to your skull, announcing the arrival of a new marital arts star. This is the first scene in the film where he gets to cut loose with his skills. Jaa runs through a gauntlet of increasingly difficult challengers, each fight more brutal than the last, emphatically finishing with a crash through a second story window. He even landed on his feet. (4) Eric Roberts is now known best as the old guy in Mariah Carey videos but he once played a top karate star in this underappreciated film. As part of Team USA, Roberts must earn as many points as he can to help beat the champion Koreans. Roberts raises his game in a brutal match but suffers a nasty blow which dislocates his shoulder. Rather than forfeiting, Roberts gets his teammate to pop the shoulder back in, screams really loud in pain, steps back into the ring, and scores the final point to win the match. (3) Realistic boxing? Hells no. That fight would've been stopped after the first round if Rocky were lucky to survive. But great drama? You bet your sweet ass. Two guys just wailing away on each other, fuck defense, until the underdog wins the match, and the hearts of an enemy nation. "If I can change, EVERYBODY can change!" A fight scene with a message. (2) The best fight from a movie full of great ones. No crazy stunts or wire work. Just two dudes beating the crap out of each other for a long time. Excellent choreography and psychology, as each man recognizes patterns in their opponents and counters them. Li was at the top of his game in this loose remake of Bruce Lee's The Chinese Connection. (1) The coolness of Spiderman and Doc Ock's powers are utilized to their fullest extent in this battle. The webs, agility, the tentacles are all allowed to cut loose in an amazing fight across Manhattan. Best of all, there's heart. Once again, Spiderman has the odds stacked against him but he gives it everything he's got, fighting off the Doctor and practically killing himself saving a runaway subway full of people. By the end of it, Spidey looked like he'd been through hell, which means I got my money's worth.
Chad Webb
5) Rip vs. Zeus - Hulk Hogan vs. Tiny Lister - No Holds Barred (1989)
4) Happy Gilmore vs. Bob Barker - Adam Sandler vs. Bob Barker - Happy Gilmore (1996)
3) King Kong vs. Godzilla King Kong vs. Godzilla (1962)
2) Daniel Larusso vs. Chozen - Ralph Macchio vs. Yuji Okumoto - The Karate Kid Part II (1986)
1) Rocky Balboa vs. Ivan Drago - Sylvester Stallone vs. Dolph Lundgren - Rocky IV (1985)
5- The movie is not among critics all time top 10 lists, but if you're a wrestling fan you can appreciate some aspects of the film. As a kid I loved Hogan, and so I still have a special place for this fight. The highlight for me was the final showdown between Rip and Zeus, where they fight all over the arena. A classic hardcore wrestling match, only in a movie instead of a pay per view. The end is truly fantastic as Zeus is thrown into the middle of the ring and collapses.
4- When one thinks of a fight, you probably think of something brutal or bloody, but this fight is perhaps the funniest of all time. Seeing Bob Barker, beloved host of "The Price is Right", beating the hell out of Adam Sandler is priceless. No pun intended. Likewise, they get some great shots in on each other until two of the most memorable one-liners are given.
3- When I was a kid I loved the Godzilla films, and the match-ups were entertaining, but only now do I realize how terrific King Kong vs Godzilla was. After the stellar remake of King Kong I can watch this and still be thoroughly entertained. They beat the crap out of each other through the whole film, that's what it's all about. The city gets demolished and King Kong is victorious. You can't beat this stuff.
2- Most people know about the first Karate Kid film, but the second was equally as awesome if you ask me. The 3rd film sucked, but give the first two credit. At the end of the Part II was one of the most spectacular fight scenes I have ever seen. It wasn't long at all, but it was mesmerizing. As the village watches on, Chozen and Larusso fight on a small island type thing, and then Daniel goes nuts on him with countless double fisted punches.
1- Well this was the greatest Rocky boxing match ever…period. The Apollo fights were incredible, but this was just unbelievable. Dolph was tremendously intimidating as the opponent, and the whole match just kept your eyes glued to the screen because of the score and because of the hatred these two showed for one another. I can't say enough about the greatness of this fight.
Bryan Kristopowitz
5) Lt. Marion "Cobra" Cobretti vs. The Night Slasher - Sylvester Stallone vs. Brian Thompson - Cobra (1986)
4) Freddy Krueger vs. Jason Voorhees - Robert Englund vs. Ken Kirzinger - Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
3) Texas Ranger JJ McQuade vs. Rawley Wilkes - Chuck Norris vs. David Carradine - Lone Wolf McQuade (1983)
2) Todd vs. Caine 607 - Kurt Russell vs. Jason Scott Lee - Soldier (1998)
1) Nada vs. Frank- Roddy Piper vs. Keith David - John Carpenter's They Live (1988)
5 - Tough as nails super cop The Cobra, Sylvester Stallone takes on the leader of a psycho serial killer cult, "The Night Slasher" Brian Thompson, in a steel foundry. Cobra has two guns but they're both out of ammo so he has to engage the killer in a brutal fist fight. Chains, knives, and gun butts do enter into play. Ends with a great giant hook in the back for the Slasher and a trip into an open furnace. Is probably the best Stallone fight outside of the Rocky flicks. Pre Fight festivities include a creepy, rambling speech by Thompson that ends with "The Law is civilized, isn't it? Pig!" and ends with the great line by Stallone "But I'm not. This is where the Law stops and I start. Sucka."
4 - Yeah, all us horror nerds were mighty upset when Kane Hodder wasn't in the hockey mask to lay the beat down on Robert Englund in the monster movie match up, but Ken Kirzinger, mirror food for Hodder in the classic Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan, does a dang good job delivering the machete mayhem to the dream killer. Slashing, kicking, blood everywhere. Monsters lose limbs. And heads. Explosions. More blood. Was worth the twenty year wait.
3 - Big Chuck Norris against Caine from "Kung Fu" in the desert. With very cool spaghetti western style music. We know their reputations as master fighters and we wait, patiently, through the rambling tough guy story until Chuck and Dave's inevitable showdown. When that music starts and Carradine does that hand waving eye pluck thing, and Chuck stands there like only Chuck can, it really doesn't matter if the upcoming kickarama is any good. We've already crapped our pants. The actual fight is pretty decent as they trade blows (Chuck is clearly the better of the two in the flick. He is the hero). It doesn't end with much of a bang (the fight ends too abruptly, although the Chuck running with the hand grenade thing is somewhat iconic, and, yeah, there is an explosion, so there is a bang, but it's not the neck snapping heart ripping out bang we were all expecting) but it does what it needs to do. Too bad we never got the Steven Seagal/Jean Claude Van Damme fight we all know would make for a good video flick.
2 - On television and DVD, this fight loses some of its initial "oomph." When this reviewer saw it in the theatre way back in '98, he was blown away at how brutal it sounded (the silence, the rain, the body blows. Unless you have a killer sound system for your home entertainment system you can't really experience this showdown). Russell's Todd was at his anger zenith at this point, and it didn't look like Lee's genetically engineered super soldier was going to make it. But Lee holds his own throughout. A nice helicopter blade to the gut and wicked neck snap end it properly. Great stuff.
1 - Legendary fist fight that starts out small and just keeps going and going (is considered one of the longest fist fights in movie history). Keith David has never looked tougher. Brutal kidney punches, kicks to the body, head butts, and wrestling moves (back suplex for David, and gut wrench suplex for Piper) bring the fight to an appropriate end. David knows that Piper ain't fooling around about the evil aliens. And there's some discrepancy about how the fight was staged. Some stories say that the fight was an actual fight that director John Carpenter just kept filming because his actors were really getting into it (sounds cool, but it highly doubtful. Wouldn't the insurance company want to know why the producers allowed the flick's two starts actually beat the crap out of one another?) and others say Piper and David choreographed the fight in David's back yard and was meticulously staged (Piper being, well, Piper, and David being a good enough athlete and stage fighter to make it all look good). "Life's a bitch, and she's back in heat."
Roddy Piper has come to kick ass and chew bubble gum. And he's all out of bubble gum. Guess that explains why he managed to make the Top 5 three times this week.
Overall, a nice mix of stuff here, I think. The Spidey vs Doc Ock fight just barely missed my list (I do consider it the best superhero fight ever), so I was glad to see Avery give it some love. And I got to hand it Webb, I totally forgot about Sandler vs. Barker, no doubt the funniest fight scene in years.
No Steven Seagal or Jean Claude Van Damme on here...I almost feel bad for them. Almost.
Maybe someday Jet Li and Jackie Chan will finally team up and bring us the fight scene to end all fight scenes, but until then, I guess these lists will do.
Next week, we'll bitch about America's tendency not to watch what they should, as we bring you The Top 5 Unjustly Canceled TV Series.
