The Sublime Movie Digest 05.10.06
Posted by Matthew Mills on 05.10.2006
All the news you've already had reported, plus a small amount of new news!
PROLOGUE
There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call… The Sublime Movie Digest.
Who's doing what movie this week? What's opening this weekend? Who wrote a moderately entertaining column? Is anybody even reading this one?
We answer all these questions, and MORE! Right here! Right now!
And away we go…
I've slowly come to a realization that I'm going to have to recycle news that people have already reported this week just to be able to fill up a column. Hey, it's not the end result that's important… just the journey there. I hope. So here I am with the news, just one week and a drill weekend later!
PS – Don't ever join the Army Reserve. So, so pointless.
THE NEWS YOU CARE ABOUT
Note: These are put in no particular order of importance.
In an interview with IGN, Ian McKellen revealed details on a scene involving his character Magneto and Professor Charles Xavier from the upcoming "X-Men 3" movie that uses a new special effects technology.
"The first time that Patrick Stewart and I appear in this film [X-Men: The Last Stand], we appear to be 25 years younger than we are. And that's been done by a technology never used in film before, which involves no makeup, no special effects whatsoever. We just go into the studio and do the scene as is, and then they morph our faces on to photographs of ourselves 25 years ago. Lo and behold, there we are."
He continued, "They can take any shaped person and they can slim you down, they can build you up, they can bring out your shoulders, change the style and color of your hair. Remove every wrinkle. They removed so many wrinkles from my face, I looked so young that [X-Men director] Brett Ratner said, 'You've got to put a few wrinkles back. It's looking ridiculous.' So it would mean that I could play myself at 25, feasibly. As long as I can keep myself lithe and sounding young."
As for the planned "Magneto" spin-off, McKellen says, "I'm not surprised [by the prequel]. Of course, that's what the comics have been doing for years," McKellen explained. "They've been having prequels and sequels and changing the plot. Going back to the past would be an obvious thing to do. To have a young Magneto story."
Credit: IGN
I'm more interested in this new technology he's talking about than the movies themselves. If that new technology actually works without looking cheesy, that could be a pretty useful tool in the future. Get that new actor smell with the veterans? Man, Hollywood would go nuts. Ish. Maybe.
It's a cool new technology, is all I'm saying. One day we're going to get oversaturated in technology and won't even need actors anymore. We'll just synthesize the voices ourselves. The Hollywood of the future!
Bahar Soomekh and Angus MacFadyen have signed on for starring roles in "Saw 3." They join Tobin Bell, Shawnee Smith and Dina Meyer, all of whom were a part of the "Saw 2" cast.
Bell will reprise his role as villain Jigsaw, and Smith and Meyer are back as Amanda and Kerry, respectively. Soomekh, who co-starred in Lionsgate's ensemble drama "Crash," will play Lynn, while MacFadyen ("Braveheart") will play Jeff.
Credit: Hollywood Reporter
I don't care what anyone else says, I like the first two Saw movies. Horrendous acting by Marky Mark's brother aside. This is about the point in the series where we'll probably see a downfall, because people can only be so creative before they start using used or clichéd ideas. Hopefully they got at least one more decent movie in them, because the second one was all kinds of awesome, and the first one wasn't half bad in itself. So we'll pretend we care long enough to see if it's worth caring.
In an interview with BBC, Keifer Sutherland said that the upcoming "24" movie will likely film in London.
"We're working on that," he said. "We'll shoot the film here. We're really excited about it. In the US, '24' was slow to catch on but in the UK it was big so Fox stuck with it, so thank you Britain."
It is also being reported that the film will shoot in Morocco, Prague and Moracco.
Credit: Cinecon.com
More stuff for you 24 fans. I'm still apathetic, but there you go.
Morocco and Moracco? Is that some kind of a weird joke on the parts of those countries? Are they actually different countries? That's weird.
Benicio Del Toro and Halle Berry are set to star in "Things We Lost in the Fire."
Paramount/Dreamworks will distribute the movie, which centers on a woman whose husband suddenly dies. The woman invites her husband's troubled best friend (Del Toro) to live with her family, and as the friend turns his life around, he helps the grief-stricken family confront their loss.
Credit: Hollywood Reporter
That sounds alright. As someone mentioned earlier in a column I'm sure you're reading right now instead of this one, Zach Braff is directing this… and Garden State was pretty decent. I'll keep an eye out for this one. Although I probably won't see it until it hits DVD unless the previews just totally blow me away.
That's it on that one.
…AND THE NEWS YOU DON'T
Note: These aren't in any particular order, either.
Producer Donald De Line and screenwriter Adam F. Goldberg have been hired to begin work on a live-action version of the classic cartoon series, "The Jetsons."
The project has been in development for many years but the hiring of De Line and Goldberg may mean that the project is finally moving forward.
The cartoon was about a futuristic space family comprising of the patriarch, George Jetson, his wife Jane, their children Judy and Elroy, Rosie the Robot, and their dog Astro.
Credit: Variety
Yeah, this is a reaaaally good idea. Because the Flintstones movie was so esteemed and everything. Seriously, who green lights this shit? Shitfire!
Plans for a prequel to the "Halloween" movies, tentatively titled "Halloween: The Missing Years," are moving forward. The film was dropped after producer Moustapha Akkad died in last year's terrorist attacks in Jordan, but writer Jake Wade Wall has confirmed that the plans are now back on.
"I've been hired three different times for it (the film)," Walls says. "It looks like it's finally set to go. I know that they're (studio executives) in the process of nailing down a really big director but I haven't been able to figure out who it is yet."
According to Walls, the prequel will focus on the life of serial killer Michael Myers as a young man, before he was placed in a mental institution.
Credit: Moviehole.net
They will never stop making inane sequels to staple horror movies, will they? I'm still waiting to see how they get Michael Myers into space.
Please, God, don't let Michael Myers and Jason ever fight. That would be like watching a silent movie all over again.
Stephen Rea and Ron Perlman have joined Thomas Jane and John Malkovich in the sci-fi action thriller "The Mutant Chronicles."
Rea will play the former commander of Lieutenant Mitch Hunter (Jane), a 23rd century Marine who tries to save Earth by leading a band of soldiers against evil NecroMutants. Perlman portrays the leader of a religious sect who thinks he can destroy the mutants and save the planet, recruiting Hunter to join him.
Credit: Hollywood Reporter
For some reason, this just screams Doom to me. Minus the hilariousness of The Rock. And source material that I might give two shits about in some world.
The Weinstein Company has landed the rights to make a movie out of the hit TV show "Knight Rider." Glen A. Larson, the original creator of the show, will write the script and serve as an executive producer.
Based on the 1980's hit television series, "Knight Rider" is a revenge story about a police investigator who is shot on the job and left to die. Nursed back to health by a mysterious millionaire, he regains consciousness a new man with a new face and a new name: Michael Knight. His mysterious benefactor provides Michael with equipment and support so that he can continue his crime fighting work and ultimately get revenge on the people who left him to die.
Great. Another show I never watched being turned into a movie I'll never see. The only thing that could possibly make my world complete now is a cameo by David Hasselhoff. Oh, come on, you know he'll do it. Like he's got anything better to do… he was in the freakin' Spongebob movie.
Nicole Kidman admits that she still loves Tom Cruise. The couple split in 2000 and Cruise is now engaged to marry Katie Holmes, the mother of his new baby daughter Suri. However, Kidman tells Ladies Home Journal she still loves Cruise.
"He was huge; still is. To me, he was just Tom, this lovely man, but to everybody else, he is huge. But he was lovely to me. And I loved him. I still love him."
She also admits to knowing her marriage with Cruise was in trouble before Cruise stunned Hollywood and filed for divorce - but it still came as a huge shock.
"I knew I was going to get hit by something, but I think a divorce, and the demise of what your family is, is a little like a death in itself."
Credit: IMDB
Sounds like something for Maury to take care of. Let's put Nicole Kidman and Katie Holmes in the steel cage and let them fight it out! TOM CRUISE AS SPECIAL GUEST ENFORCER! There's your Wrestlemania 23 main event! YESSS!
I'm done.
OPENING WEEKEND ROULETTE
Which one should YOU see? How the hell should I know? Let's discuss!
Opening April 21…
Poseidon
Directed by Wolfgang Peterson.
Starring Richard Dreyfuss, Kurt Russell, and Josh Lucas.
PROS: The original was great. Special effects today will be a vast improvement.
CONS: The original was great. Might be kinda hard to match up to it, because it has to be slightly different or it'll alienate everyone from it. If they're going to get Kurt Russel to star in it, why not just get Gene Hackman back? I mean, come on.
FINAL: I'll wait for the DVD unless I have a date that just really wants to see it. Yeah, I can get dates. Sometimes.
Just My Luck
Directed by Donald Petrie.
Starring Lindsay Lohan and Chris Pine.
PROS: None.
CONS: Infinite.
FINAL: I will never say anything good about a Lindsay Lohan movie. All you people who scream "she used to be attractive!" are on crack. And not even the good rock. Never see this movie. In fact, don't even go to the theater if it's playing this movie.
And that's another column. I'll be back next week, same Sublime site, same Sublime time. Until then, have a good one and don't go see Just My Luck. You'll thank me later.
