Broken Lizard, Kevin Smith, JJ Abrams, Masters of Horror... and best of all, I explain why Rupert Murdoch, FOX News, and the rest of the Far Right Media want Hillary Clinton as President...
Is anyone else out there completely psyched about "Beer Fest," the new Broken Lizard movie coming out next month? I've been re-watching "Super Troopers" and "Club Dread" a lot recently, re-discovering my love for these clowns. Their new one looks good on paper – let's hope they still have the Big Funny after that "Dukes of Hazzard" detour.
The Political Idiot
The Conservative Media secretly hopes and prays that Hillary Rodham-Clinton becomes President… or at least Vice Prez.
Now, before I go any farther, let me say that I don't wish this. I believe that she is competent to do the job, but her election will divide America even more than it already is. That wouldn't be good. Personally, I think John McCain would be good for the job. Tough enough for the conservatives, smart enough for the liberals.
But back to my original point…
Rupert Murdoch recently threw a lavish party for Senator Clinton, and was seen buddying up with her. Why is this? Conservatives bristled. But there is a good reason – he knows that if she becomes President, then Fox News will become the #1 channel in all of cable. CNN will be left in the dust. His empire will double, maybe even triple, if she gets elected.
Rush Limbaugh, Michael Savage, Ann Coulter… all these people may put the badmouth on Senator Clinton, they may publicly despise her, but they all want it too. They book sales and radio shows will go THROUGH THE ROOF to unprecedented numbers if she gets elected. Does anyone remember why these people got so popular in the first place? It was backlash against President Bill Clinton. A certain segment of the population hated him so much they created a revival of politico-televangelism.
The Presidential fiasco between Bush and Gore furthered this heated rift between conservatives and liberals. It was now an all out war between the two "sides" in which each treated the other like an enemy. Not a fellow countryman and patriot who loves their country and wants to make it better, but an enemy. And let me interject that this is incredibly dangerous. Liberals and conservatives are two sides of a coin, but it's the same fucking coin, so let's start acting with respect, people.
Back to my original point…
This war is still in full effect. There has been a rise in liberal talk radio and political humor under the office of George W. Bush, and the conservatives are still a strong presence, too.
But if Senator Clinton were to be elected President, this war would reach fever pitch. The groundswell of resentment toward her would create a backlash that would push the conservative media to record highs. You think liberals hate Bush now? Boy howdy, they do. But that would be nothing – a drop in the bucket – compared to the hate conservatives would show upon her inauguration.
The Idiot Box Proper
Mission: Impossible III director JJ Abrams has confirmed he's set to save the Star Trek franchise after signing on to produce the next film in the sci-fi series. The 40-year-old Lost and Alias creator, who is a longtime fan of the cult TV show and subsequent movies, is considering directing the new Trek movie too.
This is all well and good, but the word "save" really pisses me off. Here is a franchise that is 40 years old, consisting of hundreds of episodes of television over, what, 5 series? Plus the ten or so movies. That sort of longevity is almost unheard of in modern entertainment. Some say its past its prime, some say it always sucked – I'm not picking a side. All I'm saying is that "Stark Trek" is an iconic piece of entertainment that does not need to be "saved." If its time for it to die, then LET IT DIE – it had a good run, well beyond anything expected, and if fan support has dwindled that much, then just THINK OF A NEW IDEA. But if you are going to keep it around, don't be so condescending as to pick a youngster with a couple of hits and proclaim him to be a savior. I've got no problem with Abrams, and he could be a good fit to revive the franchise – so they should say it in those words, and not blow off 40 years of Star Trek history by saying this kid is going to "save" it.
Director Kevin Smith, who once said that being named by Bob Weinstein and Harvey Weinstein to write and direct The Green Hornet was like a "dream come true," now says he wants no part of the assignment. Interviewed by the website superherohype.com, Smith, who is promoting his upcoming Clerks II, said, "It was between [Hornet] and Clerks II and I drove toward Clerks II in such a big, bad way and almost had to fight Harvey Weinstein to do Clerks II as opposed to a The Green Hornet movie, cuz he's like, 'it's time for you to grow and stretch as a filmmaker' and I'm like, 'doesn't anybody get it after twelve years? I'm not that talented. This is what I do [well].' This is why I got into film, to tell stories like that. I love watching comic book movies. I'd love to watch a The Green Hornet movie, but would not want to be the guy at the helm of that movie. ... I make one of those movies and I lose the right to make fun of other people for making those movies. I learned that the hard way making Jersey Girl I can't make fun of Raising Helen anymore. If I raise one finger to Raising Helen, people are like, 'Dude, you made Jersey Girl'." Jersey Girl, which starred Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez, cost $35 million to produce and wound up making only $25 million at the domestic box office.
It is good to see him owning up to what many of us already knew via common sense.
Heels of the Week
And tie this week -- both guys come from the same source material. It's the Showtime network show "Masters of Horror," now available on video and DVD. The episode in question is "Pick Me Up," directed by B-movie legend Larry Cohen.
The plot is great – Michael Moriarty plays a trucker who drifts the quiet highways and picks of hitchers. He kills the hitchers, and tows them in the back of his truck. Warren Kole plays a hitcher who takes rides, and then kills everyone who picks him up. These two killers end up stalking the same victim, and engage in a friendly rivalry along the way. This is one of the best installments of the show that I have seen, and both characters are wicked, evil sons of bitches.
Merle Vaughn is an ex-soldier, an ex-bodyguard for a Vietnamese druglord, an ex-con, and an ex employee for a local dope trucking operation. After his new wife is murdered, this lifelong killer and thug is now the single father of a four month old baby girl. Merle wants to protect his daughter, and he'll kill the entire city to do it.
I'm using the blog to post updates and chapters on a crime novel. It's tough, violent, brutal in spots, even – but there is more going on than crime. Check it out
And after that, head over to the Podcast Homepage
where you'll find collection of all the Podcasts I've recorded with my buddies. Features yours truly expounding upon B movies, music, and dumb shit with a couple of actual journalists. It's called Scene and Heard. It is worth a listen, if only for my Barry White-ishly sexy voice. Word to that.
