The 411 Top 5: Week 57
Posted by Trevor Snyder on 04.20.2007
The Top 5 Television Sidekicks
No real need for a long, drawn-out, witty intro this week, I suppose. You all know the score. Last week we looked at the best sidekicks in movie history, but since this is the Movies and TV section of 411, we can't let the great second bananas of the small screen go without any recognition. So allow us to give you our take on:
THE TOP 5 TELEVISION SIDEKICKS
Trevor Snyder
5. Jefferson D'Arcy (Ted McGinley) on Married with Children
Married with Children was already a great show during the Steve Rhodes days, but it really hit its stride with the introduction of Jefferson, who proved to be the perfect companion for Al Bundy. Whereas Steve had served as a straight-man for Al's antics, Jefferson was right there with Al, gleefully joining him on all sorts of ridiculous adventures and get-rich-quick schemes. Of course, it's not like he had anything else to do, since he refused to ever go out and find a job, much to the consternation of wife Marcy. As a matter of fact, as lazy and unmotivated as Jefferson was, he was pretty much just a male version of Peg Bundy…well, except for that whole CIA agent past, that is.
4. GIR (Rikki Simmons) on Invader Zim
The standout character of the unfortunately short-lived Nickelodeon cartoon series, GIR was intended to be a state-of-the-art, helpful, and deadly robot sent to aid an evil space alien in his plans to take over the earth. As it turns out, however, the rest of Zim's kind doesn't really like him all that much, so they simply gave him a defective model. This defective model was GIR, who apart from rare occasions where he actually did what he was told, was far more interested in things like slushies and tacos than in sharing his master's desire to conquer the world. I'm not sure the creators of the show intended GIR to be the best thing about it, but that abundance of GIR merchandise that continues to sell at your local Hot Topic store is a pretty good indication that that's what happened.
3. Waylon Smithers (Harry Shearer) on The Simpsons
Like my previous choice (and the choice following this one, for that matter), Smithers continues the time-honored tradition of sidekicks to evil characters, who are not quite as evil as their superior characters. Not that it matters much with Smithers. Except for a few well-remembered instances when he actually found the stones to stand up to Mr. Burns, Smithers is usually content to simply live with the abuse and evil plans of his boss. And why shouldn't he be? After all, he does love the guy. And I mean, really love the guy.
2. TV's Frank (Frank Conniff) on Mystery Science Theater 3000
MST3K certainly had no shortage of sidekicks, whether it was the bots themselves, or the Sci-Fi Channel era's Professor Bobo and Observer (aka Brain Guy). But for the best, look no further than TV's Frank. When the evil Dr. Clayton Forrester's first sidekick, Josh, left after the first season, the mad scientist got lucky, hiring TV's Frank away from the local Arbys. Unlike the more over-the-top evil of Forrester, Frank was simply a sweet, naïve, and somewhat simple kind of guy. He must have been very good-natured, after all, considering how much abuse he endured at the hands of Forrester (including Forrester's annoying little habit of, you know, constantly killing Frank) and still remained loyal. But Frank was so lovable that that loyalty ran both ways – when Frank was eventually summoned up to sidekick heaven by the angel Torgo the White (you'd really have to watch the show to understand any of this, I suppose), Forrester sang a touching tribute to his absent companion, wondering who he would kill now.
1. Robin (Burt Ward) on Batman
I know, I know, what a clichéd choice, right? But that's exactly why I had to do it – when you hear the term, you think of Robin. There's a reason for that. He was absolutely perfect in the sidekick role, and was exactly what you want from that sort of character: he never outshined the main character, but at the same time you just really can't picture the show without him. Adam West and Burt Ward might hate each other nowadays, but back then they truly made a perfect pair, or a "dynamic duo," if you will. On a side note, although I singled out Burt Ward's iconic performance as the character, this pick really includes all of the Robin's from the numerous Batman animated series incarnations as well.
Owain J. Brimfield
HONOURABLE MENTIONS:
Al (Dean Stockwell) in Quantum Leap
Sgt. Gavin Troy (Daniel Casey) in Midsomer Murders
The robots in Mystery Science Theater 3000
THE TOP FIVE
5. The Cat (Danny John-Jules) in Red Dwarf
Surely only British science fiction could feature a character who has evolved from cat to human over three million years in deep space. John-Jules, a professional dancer, is a perfect fit for the part, absolutely nailing the requisite feline characteristics and handling the character's development over the course of the series with aplomb. Cat provides a surreal and egotistical counterpoint to the show's premise, which if you think about it is awfully downcast, and must have been an absolute godsend to the show's wardrobe designer.
4. Manny Bianco (Bill Bailey) in Black Books
Okay, Manny is essentially Bill Bailey playing himself, but he's such a funny man you can't complain. From the first episode, in which he accidentally swallows the Little Book of Calm and transforms into a quasi-messianic being, you knew the show was on to a winner. His earnest beardiness is perfectly offset against Dylan Moran's complete antipathy toward mankind in the lead role, and plus, he just has one of those "comedy faces" that you can't help but laugh at. Incidentally, anyone who hasn't seen Bailey's stand-up work hasn't lived.
3. Father Dougal Maguire (Ardal O'Hanlon) in Father Ted
Quite possibly the most idiotic character in sitcom history, Dougal's infantile behaviour and remarkable lack of intelligence are somehow rather endearing. He stole the show in virtually every episode of the show's three-season run - no mean feat considering the comedic calibre of the cast. For all of Ted's endless frustration with Dougal's antics, deep down he loves him, and that's the most important part of the lead/sidekick relationship. For anyone whose impressions of O'Hanlon have been tainted by his involvement with the woeful My Hero, a quick return to this masterpiece of a show will restore your faith convincingly.
2. Baldrick (Tony Robinson) in Blackadder
The man with the "cunning plan", Baldrick is constantly on the receiving end of a tirade of abuse from his boss Blackadder for his ridiculous ideas. Despite the fact that Baldrick's plans are always entirely laughable, such is the scorn heaped upon him that the viewer can't help but feel sorry him - it's also to Tony Robinson's credit that this vile little creature is eminently likeable. In a later series, we learn that Baldrick's first name is "Sod-Off". It's quite fitting.
1. Bender (John DiMaggio) in Futurama
The irascible, irrational, beer-drinking, fire-belching robot runs very close to the throne of "most memorable animated character". It's just a joy to watch Bender in action whenever he's on screen, and his interplay with Fry produces the best character dynamic on this list. As a sidekick, his defining trait lies with his character's originality (although of course, the show itself is one of the most idiosyncratic in recent years), as let's face it, robots are damn cool, but foul-mouthed banjo-playing robots are even better. Oh, and "bite my shiny metal ass"? Best. Catchphrase. Ever.
Chad Webb
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
-- Richard Karn as Al Borland from Home Improvement
-- Arthur from The Tick (either series)
-- Odie from Garfield & Friends
THE TOP FIVE
5. Bender Bending Rodriguez from Futurama
Not too long ago, when Family Guy returned and its popularity was really high, I read about a debate which argued the following: which is better - Family Guy or Futurama? For me, it was always Futurama, and the reason is the character of Bender, voiced by John DiMaggio. For those who do not know, Bender is the best friend and sidekick to Fry, the main character of the show. Bender is a foul mouthed robot that was originally programmed to bend steel beams. He is a kleptomaniac, alcoholic, and also enjoys smoking cigars. Bender also hates humans. He has so many great one-liners, or just tremendously comical general responses to random incidents. Not everyone likes Futurama, but it is one of my favorite animated shows because of him. It would be hard for me to pick a specific episode where he was in top-form. One of my all-time favorite moments is when Bender becomes depressed (for some reason I can't think of), and grows a beard that is called his "five o' clock rust."
4. Luther Van Dam from Coach
Luther was Hayden Fox's defensive coordinator on this television series. He was played by Jerry Van Dyke. I thought about putting both Luther and Dauber on here as dual sidekicks, but Luther definitely edges him out as a personal favorite of mine. I loved this show, and Luther's antics with Hayden and Dauber was the best part. Luther's hobbies when he wasn't bothering Hayden included eating for the most part. When he wasn't along side the other two, he was still hilarious on his own with his dog Quincy. Van Dyke was just marvelous in this role. It is a shame that the seasons are being released so slowly to DVD. As a trio, Van Dyke, Craig T. Nelson, and Bill Fagerbakke had so much natural chemistry together, and without Luther it wouldn't have been the same. I always find myself laughing so hard when I watch him.
3. Johnny Drama from Entourage
Some might prefer Turtle, but Johnny Drama has to be one of the most hysterical sidekicks in television history. Despite being Vincent Chase's older brother, he stills qualifies as one of his loyal sidekicks. I have talked before about how much I love this show, but when I chat with other fans about memorable moments, Drama is the main topic of conversation. He has given us so many scenes to laugh and smile at. Here are a few unforgettable Drama episodes. When he follows around a random dude admiring his calves, and then questions him on if he's had surgery. I forget where the comic-con was, but watching Drama march through the lobby in his Viking Quest outfit shouting "Victory!" is priceless. Recently, I finished Season 3, Part 1, and he supplied yet another great moment when he pleasured himself in his trailer, and forgot that his microphone was still on. The reason I selected Drama is not just because he is funny, but because he has those key times when he acts as the more mature older brother to Vince. He has experienced a lot, and knows a thing or two about the Hollywood ups and downs. He is a superb character, and Kevin Dillon will forever be remembered because of him.
2. Dwight Schrute from The Office
I will be the first to admit that I am not the biggest Office fan, but I do like the show to an extent, and watch it whenever the situation arises. Rainn Wilson as Dwight is the nucleus of this series. He acts as "assistant regional manager" to Michael Scott. I am not an expert on the episodes or anything, but I know a brilliant character when I see one, and Dwight is precisely that. I just watched an episode from Season 2 where Dwight was angry that Michael was spending too much time with Ryan the intern. He got in his car and started blaring "Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M. as the group was listening outside due to a fire scare. It is fantastic scenes like this that Dwight is known for. He has so many memorable moments. If not for him, I would probably not watch this show very much. I like him more and more as time goes along.
1. George Costanza from Seinfeld
I really don't have to go into detail for this selection. Seinfeld is one of the best shows ever made, and while each of the four main characters are funny and special in their own way, George was above the rest in my opinion. I guess he reminds me of myself from time to time. Things never seem to go his way, and he is often caught is such embarrassing and awkward circumstances. Jason Alexander is an excellent comedic actor, and he can try other shows as much as he wants, but he will never again reach the success or respect of George on Seinfeld. I don't have to list his best episodes, or funniest lines. Most of you already know of them. Because George is such a crucial member to this foursome, and because he has delivered so many stellar moments, he is my pick for the best TV sidekick.
Bryan Kristopowitz
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- Hank Kingsley (Jeffrey Tambor) in The Larry Sanders Show (1992-1998)
"Heyyy noooowwww" Hank Kinglsey, the Ed McMahon to Larry Sanders' Johnny Carson. On the show, the actual talk show part, Hey Now Hank was affable, funny, right there to interact with Sanders when he needed him to. Behind the scenes, Kingsley was a total douchebag. But even there he worked in tandem with Sanders, showing two sides to the whole talk show shebang: the cool and calm but nervous in a show business kind of way Larry Sanders and the asswipe with the job to warm up the crowd and then not throw up on set during an interview. This is Tambor's signature role, the thing he's best at. He's like a more subdued version of the character he played in Mr. Mom, just slightly more sleazy.
- Arthur (Rip Torn) in The Larry Sanders Show (1992-1998)
Larry's producer, the man responsible for the in and outs of the show behind the scenes, master of "the loop," and the mind behind the array of plants behind Larry's desk. He's obviously more aggressive than Hank Kingsley. That's his job, to make sure Hank doesn't mess everything up, and to make sure Larry can get through his monologue. Rip Torn has been playing variations of this character for years now, and it's obvious why. He is this character.
- Eddie Finnerty (Kevin Corragan) in Grounded for Life (2001-2005)
I love this show and have recently started rewatching it on the weekends (it's on the Family Channel at 11am. Anyway). Corragan's Eddie is the brother and therefore natural sidekick to Donal Logue's Sean Finnerty, the head of the Finnerty fivesome. Eddie is lazy, surly, and single, unlike his brother. So when Eddie and Sean get into trouble (oh, and they certainly do) we get to see two sides to the trouble: the maried man side (Sean) and the single guy side (Eddie). Corragan, for whatever reason, seems to be channeling Christopher Walken every time he appears. That's not a bad thing. It's just what he does. And as we all know Walken is the epitome of cool and calm, which is the anthithesis of Sean's constant state of frazzled.
THE TOP FIVE
5. Freddie "Rerun" Stubbs (Fred Berry) in What's Happening!! (1976-1979)
Rerun is actually a sidekick to two people, Raj and Dwayne (Ernest Thomas and Haywood Nelson). Rerun is the funny fat guy in the middle, the butt of all (most of the) jokes, the guy the show went to when it needed a laugh. And Fred Berry always delivered in that regard. And it's not like Berry was doing something original. How often do you get a fat guy that isn't the butt of jokes? Plus, he had a red beret and matching suspenders.
4. KITT (Knight Industries Two Thousand) (voice of William Daniels) in Knight Rider (1982-1986)
Something definitely has to be said for the actual car, the Pontiac Trans Am, and the many stunt cars that did the "wow" stunt work (and a special shout of for the "Super Pursuit Mode" version of the car), but what's the one thing that people remember about the Knight Rider car? That voice. The interaction with Michael Knight (David Hassheloff), the witty banter back and forth, the care each showed for the other. If that voice didn't work, if no one believed in it, Hasselhoff wouldn't have had much to work with himself, and the show would have failed. And that's what we remember.
3. Steve Rhodes (David Garrison) in Married...with Children (1987-1995)
He didn't have as long a tenure as Ted "Stan Gable" McGinley's "Jefferson D'Arcy," and there's defintely something to be said for McGinley's contribution to the show. He was there when the show hit its great "silly stride," when he and Al got into all sorts of schemes. But, to me, Marcy's first husband and Al's first buddy, Steve, is the best. Because Steve actually embodied the moral opposite (to a degree. We are dealing with an admitted Republican banker here) of Al Bundy. Steve was actually a decent human being. And so when Al corrupted him, Steve was that much funnier, and the show was that much funnier. Who can forget their "Elvis Blue Suede Shoes" scheme? Or the time they took the kids camping and Steve had poison ivy on his tongue, or the time they attacked the mouse in the basement with toxic chemicals?
2. Dr. Spock (Leonard Nimoy) in Star Trek (1966-1969)
Nimoy's Vulcan science officer for the USS Enterprise is the exact opposite of the ship's human leader, Captain Kirk (William Shatner), which is why he's such a great asset to have around. It's in that relationship that another relationship develops, the big (shall I call it?) friendship that the two have. They have each other's back.
1. Ed Norton (Art Carney) in The Honeymooners (1955-1956)
For sitcoms, and for The Honeymooners specifically, it's all about the crazy scheme. Ralph Kramden (Jackie Gleason) is usually the guy that creates the scheme or gets sucked into the scheme by someone else, and the one guy backing him up is his best buddy "Norton." The great thing about Norton is you can tell that while he may not be the smartest person in the world, he's certainly smarter than Ralph, but he never rubs it in his best friend's face. He's there to support him. Now, Norton probably should have shoved his smarts in Ralph's face more often. If he did they would have actually got on the correct train for the Racoon Lodge meeting.
Jason Chamberlain
HONOURABLE MENTIONS:
Bender, on Futurama
There's not much I can add to what everyone has already said besides this; any robot that tells Grunka Lunkas to shut the hell up is awesome.
Brian, on Family Guy-
He's a dog, but he's the most rational member of the household. And he's got a great singing voice!
Steve's Japanese Friend Toshi, on American Dad
Cause he's the fricken man."Fool. Now who will shoe our horses?"
THE TOP FIVE
5. Quagmire, on Family Guy
How can you not love Peter's sex crazed friend Quagmire? This guy has been responsible for more moments of hilarity on the show than perhaps any other character. He really has no redeemable qualities; he is simply a sex fiend that will sleep with anyone or anything at any time in any place. He goes to soccer practices to pick up soccer moms, and parent teacher nights because he figures he has kids in their 20's out there! He has his phone number tattooed on his ass, his home is a fully functional babe lair, and who can forget the immortal line, "Hey I have a question for you too, why are you still here?" Simply put, Quagmire rules.
4. Sayid Jarrah, on Lost
On a show with about 15 main characters, Sayid may be the closest thing to a sidekick you can find. He hasn't really taken on a central role in the show, which is kind of a shame because he's an amazing character. An Iraqi and veteran of the Gulf War, he not only has to deal with prejudice because of his skin color but he carries the demons of a career torturing people for the Republican Guard. It's a skill he's not proud of, but one he has used a couple times on the island, on Sawyer when it was believed he had Shannon's asthma meds, and on ‘Henry Gale' when the other's leader, real name Ben, was incarcerated in the hatch. He's also pretty good in a fight, and is the island's resident gadget master. And he's one of the only people to get laid since the crash, thanks to his short and tragic romance with Shannon. If that's not enough, he's also got the sharpest bullshit detector on the island.
3. Michael Vaughn, on Alias
When Sydney Bristow first walked into the CIA after learning she had been duped into working for a terrorist organization for seven years, it was Michael Vaughn who took her case. Becoming her CIA handler, in the early days of the show Vaughn gave Sydney her counter missions in order to destroy the evil SD6 from the inside. As the show continued Syd and Vaughn drew closer to the point where their love story became central to the show. What I always found enjoyable about Vaughn's character was his unfailing compassion. When Sydney felt like she was getting in too deep as a double agent and needed someone to talk to, Vaughn lent her an ear and a shoulder to cry on. When attending the funeral of a fallen comrade, he broke rank and protocol in order to console the grieving son of the deceased. And when Syd's friend Will lost his job as a reporter, Vaughn went out of his way to get him some work as a researcher for the agency. Aside from being a good guy, Vaughn was a great agent that helped save the world on numerous occasions. Though he went through dark periods and even died for a little while, he and Syd got to ride off into the sun happily ever after.
2. Wesley Wyndam-Pryce, on Angel
If Joss Whedon is known for anything it's his penchant to craft characters that go on incredible journeys during their time on his shows. Such was the case with Wesley, who arrived in Sunnydale during Buffy's third season as the stuffy replacement watcher after Giles had been fired. It quickly became evident that Wesley had neither the courage nor the stomach for the job and Giles essentially remained watcher for both Buffy and Faith. After contributing to Faith's dark turn by attempting to apprehend her and send her to the watcher's council in Britain, and being knocked out early in the climactic battle against The Mayor, he left town and the council's employ to become a rogue demon hunter. But when he arrived in Los Angeles and joined Team Angel, it was obvious he was still the same old stuffy watcher with little to no fighting skills. As Wesley integrated himself into Angel's team, he started to become a better fighter and leader, to the point where he even took over leadership of the group when Angel took a turn to the dark side. Wesley continued to be a staunch ally and friend to the gang until he was forced to kidnap Angel's son Connor after reading a prophecy that Angel would kill his own son. The perceived act of mercy ended with terrible results and Wes was ostracized from the group, resulting in his growth into a true demon hunter and leader. He ran his own demon hunting gang for a while, carried a shotgun and even went toe to toe with Angelus! Whether he was played for laughs or for drama, the character of Wesley was always a strong and valued member of Team Angel and was masterfully performed by Alexis Denisof.
1. Daniel ‘Oz' Osbourne, on Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Sidekicks don't come much cooler than Seth Green's laconic, guitar-playing teen werewolf Oz. During his time on the show Oz was the definition of effortless cool. He remained stoic and relaxed no matter what was going on around him, whether that meant a pesky librarian babbling on about some supernatural force, the adoration of fans at one of his bands shows at The Bronze, or the discovery that vampires are real. Nothing ever fazed Oz. He provided a ton of memorable moments throughout the series, from waking up naked in the forest after his first night as a werewolf and simply saying ‘huh', to his call of "Uh.... arm!" when helping the Scooby Gang collect pieces of blown up demon The Judge.
Xander: I mean you yourself, Oz, are considered more or less cool. Why is that?
Oz: Am I?
Xander: Is it the way you talk? How you tend to express yourself in short, non-committal phrases?
Oz: Could be.
But what was really interesting about Oz was his heart-warmingly genuine relationship with Willow. While Angel and Buffy were having a torrid and tumultuous affair and Xander and Cordelia were shacking up in janitor's closets, Oz and Willow had a safe and loving union that was only undone when he left Sunnydale to learn more about his wolf side. What was originally called a hiatus turned into a permanent absence as Seth Green only returned for one more episode, and for my money the series suffered for his absence.
Dave Tomlinson
5. Jefferson D'Arcy (Ted McGuinley) in Married… With Children
Steve might have been first, but I'd scarcely refer to Steve as a sidekick, he was far too independent. Jefferson was Al's toady through and through. Nuff said.
4. Beavis (Mike Judge) in Beavis and Butt-head
His name may be in the title of the show, but come on, Butt-head is clearly in charge. Beavis just agrees with everything Butt-head says, does what he's told and only talks back when he gets amped up on caffeine and sugar.
3. Dr. Chris Turk (Donald Faison) inScrubs
Sidekicks come in all shapes and sizes. They don't always have to play second fiddle to the hero. Sure, to the average passer-by J.D. (Zach Braf) fits the mold better, but it's his show. Turk is a unique sidekick because he's the cooler of the two. He keeps J.D. in line and teaches him how to be cool, not the other way around. Just one of the many ways Scrubs is one of the best comedies going.
2. Andy Richter (himself) in Late Night with Conan O'brien
Ed McMahon should probably get the nod here, but Johnny Carson signed off when I was 9, so I never watched any of his years, even though he was the first late night sidekick. A few others might say Paul Schaefer (fuck Kevin Eubanks and Jay Leno), but sorry, I'll always prefer Andy's shenanigans on Conan. He left to make his own name, but sadly he's been on two fantastic series (Andy Richter Controls the Universe, Andy Barker, P.I.) that were canceled before their time. And one lousy one, but we'll forget about Quintuplets.
1. The Cast of Springfield: Moe Szylak, Barney Gumble, Milhouse Van Houten, Lenny Leonard, Karl Karlson, Ned Flanders, Sideshow Mel… (various voices) The Simpsons
Ah, The Simpsons, probably the best comedy in TV history. One of the reasons is because it blurs the line between sidekick and recurring character. Moe might be the best example. He's Homer's buddy, but he's had several episodes devoted to him. Has he transcended? Hard to say. Chief Wiggum, he's a recurring character, fellow officers Lou and Eddie, they're sidekicks. Whatever you want to call them, the cast of Springfield offer just about every variety of sidekick you could ask for.
Nick Wallander
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
Andy Richtor from Late Night With Conan O'Brien
Jefferson Darcy from Married With Children
Launchpad McQuack Ducktales and Darkwing Duck
THE TOP FIVE
5. Milhouse from The Simpsons
Milhouse comes from a vast cast of characters that all could be considered a sidekick to some extent. The thing with Milhouse is that the kid was there since the beginning as Bart's best friend. Not only is Milhouse the best friend, but he has even worked his way into The Simpsons overall mythology with his widely shared love for Lisa. He is like a classic television best friend that has had all the typical story arcs: love for the best friend's sister, finds temporary new best friend, his parents divorce, a fight over a comic book, and so on. Basically Milhouse is the standout sidekick on a standout show.
4. Norm Peterson from Cheers
Norm was not really any one person's sidekick, but more of one for the bar as a whole. Norm Peterson was synonymous with Cheers. Every person in America could probably tell you exactly where he sat in that bar. Think about that for a second. Remember? Thought so. Also, any man who gets an entire bar to chant out his name upon entering is a man of mythic proportions. Oh, did I mention the man was funny too? Poor Vera probably never knew how many jokes were mad at her expense.
3. Xander Harris from Buffy the Vampire Slayer
The loyalty and love of Xander Harris is probably unparalleled in television history. He would stand by his beloved Buffy and the rest of the Scooby gang until the bitterest of ends. Hell, when his best friend went all meta-witchy and was about to destroy the world, he was the one who still stood by her and was able to save the day just by being himself. That was the cool thing about Xander. He was the one guy in the gang without any special power or abilities. That is what made him unique and the most inexpendable member of the entire team because he was everyone's go to guy. Perhaps the coolest thing with Xander as a sidekick was the barrage of geeky quips and pop culture references. All of us geeks can appreciate that and relate.
2. Dwight K Schrute from The Office
The only man on this with as much loyalty as Xander Harris has to be Dwight K Schrute, the assistant to the regional manager at Dunder Mifflin in Scranton, PA. Dwight's loyalty and unspoken man-crush for Michael Scott are what sets the standard for a real good obsessive sidekick. Each week Dwight says or does something that will get you to bust your gut. He is a strange man who obsesses over bear attacks, martial arts, beets, and archaic customs (such as shunning).
1. GOB/Buster Bluth from Arrested Development
These two get lumped together because they are not only family, but such a great comedic team. Arrested Development was perhaps the greatest modern sitcom and it was in part because of zany characters like GOB and Buster. They were incompetent, dishonest, selfish, and childish all rolled into one. Normally that would make you despise a couple of guys, but not with these two. Their brother, Michael, had his hands full and was constantly trying to clean up their messes. Whether it was GOB "making a huge mistake" with a botched illusion or Buster faking a coma to avoid testifying, their antics were well intended for the most part. The best episodes were when the Bluth brothers had to work together to solve a problem because both GOB and Buster would somehow bring out the real Bluth in Michael. That, my friends, is real comedy. COME ON!
Ron Martin
HONORABLE MENTIONS
Ethel Mertz, I Love Lucy
Muttley, Wacky Races, Laff-a-Lympics, Stop the Pigeon
Robin, Batman
THE TOP FIVE
5. Barney Rubble, The Flintstones
You see, Fred Flintstone was the sort of guy who would do nothing alone. He needed a little buddy to be with him in order to gather the courage to join the Order of Water Buffalo. He also had a lot of hair-brained schemes and needed a halfwit follower to hinge on his every word. Enter Barney Rubble. With his dopey laugh (come on, think for a moment and it will come to you), Barney was right there by Fred's side whether it was dealing with the Great Gazoo or trying to break into Hollyrock. Barney was truly the first ever sidekick – given his prehistoric status and all. He is also an idol to short dumpy guys everywhere due to his smoking hot wife, Betty. Jack Black owes his entire career success to the road walked first by Mr. Barney Rubble.
4. The Scoobies, Buffy, The Vampire Slayer
As a loyal Buffy fanboy, I will probably lose points for not ranking the Scoobies higher or by not picking out just one or two. I find it hard to do that as they were not individual sidekicks but supported her as a group. It was because of the Scoobies that Buffy was able to live a lot longer than the slayers before and after her -- until she died. Twice. Like good sidekicks, the Scoobies resurrected Buffy. Twice. You can't discount a group that at one time or another included two watchers, two vampires with souls, a socialite who would later become a visionary, a werewolf, two witches, a technoPAGAN, a fallen slayer, an on-again off-again vengeance demon, a top secret military agent, Buffy's little sister and Xander. ‘Nuff said.
3. Ed Norton, The Honeymooners
You can take pretty much everything I said about Barney Rubble and apply it to Ed Norton. Just replace one name with another and Fred Flintstone with Ralph Kramden. Ed was always there to lend Ralph an unquestioning hand with his schemes and adventures. Even when his own wife would turn away with a sarcastic remark, Ralph knew he could count on Norton. Even as a sidekick, Norton managed to carve his own niche in the American psyche with his pre-billiards rituals, outsmarting Ralph when it came to sharing the TV and yes, ladies and gentlemen, it was Ed Norton that made working in the sewers sexy!
2. Barney Fife, The Andy Griffith Show
If you are in a show that is titled someone else's name, then you are pretty much relegated to sidekick status. Every once in awhile the paranoid deputy would get a hankering for a little more authority. Like any good sidekick, once the main man stepped out, Barney was sitting in his chair with his feet on his desk. Not just good enough to be his sidekick in the law, Andy thought it warranted that he make Barney his sidekick in life. Barney was relegated to second pick amongst the females and always had to be inconvenienced by having to eat dinner at Andy's house. Never would Andy step foot into Barney's place. For all we know, Barney lived in a cardboard box somewhere near Otis. Barney would catch a break later when his brother would call him to be a live-in super at an apartment complex in California. Even there he would be relegated to sidekick status.
1. Norville "Shaggy" Rogers, Scooby Doo, Where Are You?
Don't let the pot-smoking hippie look fool you. Shaggy was no dope. He knew which side his bread was buttered on. The show was named after Scooby Doo. Not the more intelligent Velma. Not the brawnier Fred. Nor the prettier Daphne. It was named for the dumb, hungry dog. Sure if he followed Scooby around he was likely to get chased by the monster or used as bait in the trap. However, he was also going to get make some ginormous sandwich, even if the kitchen was in a house that had been abandoned for a hundred years. More importantly, he got a lot more camera time hanging out with Scooby. You think this isn't important? Who's the only character who moved on with Scooby into the many other varieties of Scooby Doo? Exactly. It is because of this man that we all now know the word "Zoinks!"
And there you have it, two weeks of showing some love to the second fiddles of the world. After a lifetime of living in someone else's shadow, I'm sure they appreciate the spotlight.
Next week, we try to give a little help to all the TV network heads currently trying to figure out their fall schedule, when we take a look at The Top 5 Shows That Gotta Go.
