411 Fact or Fiction Movies: Week 96

Posted by Ben Piper on 10.06.2007

Are people anticipating the return of American Gladiators? Is Rose McGowan a bad choice to play Barbarella? And will The Heartbreak Kid be Ben Stiller's best movie in some time? 411's Trevor Snyder and Ben Moser debate these and other topics in week 96 of Fact or Fiction: Movies!



Is it just me, or does anyone else find it ironic that the guy who's recapping South Park for 411 has the last name of Cusson?

But that's neither here nor there. Welcome back once again to everyone's favorite internet debate column, Fact or Fiction. As always, I am your humble moderator Ben Piper. This week we have two more 411 mainstays, The Top Five's Trevor Snyder and the returning Doctor in the Hallway, Ben Moser discussing the entertainment topics of the day. Let's see what's on their minds, shall we?

1. You were surprised by Jackie Chan's online blog in which he negatively derided all of his American films, including his upcoming project with Jet Li.

Trevor Snyder: Fact- It's true that Chan's American films haven't even come close to matching the frenzied excitement and exhilaration of his original Chinese work, but I'm surprised to hear he that he doesn't seem proud of any of them. The first Rush Hour film was quite good, and both Shanghai movies were a blast. And, besides, it's not like he's always cranked out nothing but classics in his home country, either. Who Am I?, anyone? I'm betting this statement has more to do with Chan's frustration at the American filming style, and the reluctance of those films to allow Chan to be as risky and out there as he likes, then it does with the actual quality of the movies themselves.

Ben Moser: Fiction - I always thought that Chan was doing these films to help out his bank account more than his need to make the kinds of flicks he likes to make. If you've watched enough of Jackie Chan's home-grown movies, you can tell the difference in the action sequences is huge, the sense of humor is different, and he's not playing sidekick to someone else delivering wise-ass comments. So no, I'm not that surprised. This isn't to say that he didn't have a good time making bad movies. I'm sure he had a blast on some his American features. The good times are fleeting, though, and reruns of Rush Hour on cable TV are forever.

Score: 0 for 1

2. Rose McGowan would be a horrible choice to play Barbarella.

Trevor Snyder: Fiction- Why? It's not like you need a great actress to play Barbarella. Last time I checked, it seemed like the only requirement was being hot and breathing, both of which I think McGowan has down-pat. McGowan has yet to completely blow me, or anyone else, away with her acting skills, but she's always been at-least decent. Her best performance to date was probably in Planet Terror, and given that that film's director (and her current squeeze) Robert Rodriguez is also helming Barbarella, I see no reason to suspect that she won't pull it off. I mean, geez, it can't be much worse than the Fonda version anyways, right?

Ben Moser: Fiction - What Snyder said about the requirements for the character is true. Barbarella needs to be hot. There are maybe, maybe 3 actresses in Hollywood hotter than Rose McGowan(and none of them would probably touch this role with a 20-foot pole, nor are they shagging Rodriguez). Based on Planet Terror, though, I would go so far as to say that, from a purely acting point of view, McGowan is a near-perfect choice. She clearly has a knack for the kind of over-the-top nonsense that Barbarella will demand. For future evidence of her willingness to ham it up awesome-style, see Jawbreaker, an entirely underrated flick.

Score: 1 for 2

3. Another Jackass movie would be an unneccessary bad idea.

Trevor Snyder: Fact- The logical thinking here is that another movie might end up with one of the cast-members dead or seriously injured, as their need to top themselves was definitely starting to get a little scary with the last movie. But the truth is, I'm calling this a bad idea simply because I just don't care anymore. Jackass 2 was fun, but was also a lot more hit-and-miss than the first film, and watching it you kinda got the sense that even the cast knew the franchise's best days were behind them. By its very nature, Jackass was destined to be something that would be huge for awhile, and then just die out admirably. Knoxville and co. seemed to have understood that before, as they originally claimed the first movie would be the swansong. Now, every time they come back for me it just feels like a shameless cash grab. I feel kinda dumb to say something like "their hearts aren't in it" when we're talking about something that relies on poop jokes and constant nut trauma, but there you have it. There's just no reason for another Jackass movie. Maybe they can still make us giggle, but they can't shock us anymore. And if that's the case, then what's the point?

Ben Moser: Fiction - It pains me to say it, but a third Jackass flick would still make obscene amounts of money, and that's all you need to be considered a good idea. If I had my way, America would have rejected this nonsense before it even got to MTV. Instead, we're going to be seeing more movies and knock-off shows/YouTube videos until the first time the returns aren't in the positive dollars section. And I have to think that these movies are made on the cheap, so we could be up to Jackass 20: Wherein Steve-O Nails His Nut-Sack to A Space Ship Yet Somehow Survives Giving the Fundamentalists on the Right Ammo to Say that the Idea of Natural Selection is Full of Crap. Maybe it'll roll out of theaters by Jackass 5, but don't neglect the power of the direct-to-video market.

Score: 1 for 3

Switch!!!

4. The Heartbreak Kid will be the best Ben Stiller movie in some time.

Ben Moser: Fiction - You asked the wrong guy this question. As far as I'm concerned, Ben Stiller plays one character and only one character in every movie that features him as the star. He's a much better idea-man, and I would love to see him retire to a spot behind the camera for all time. The one time he played a variation on that character was Mystery Men, and it turns out that it was far and away his best performance ever. In the meantime, the Farrelly brothers have never done anything I would consider funny, cute, or amusing. Never. So I really don't think that Ben Stiller's one character in a movie directed by two guys who constantly put out movies that make me want to jump off of tall buildings is going to make for a breakthrough Stiller performance.

Trevor Snyder: Fact - If only because that won't be hard. I definitely like Stiller more than Moser does (Zoolander = comic genius), but I will agree that he's been a bit..."off" for the last few years. The last thing I can remember actually liking Stiller in was his one episode stint on Extras and his brief cameo in Anchorman. Still, I think the guy has a lot of talent, and he used to be one of my favorite comedic actors. So there's definitely a part of me that would like for The Heartbreak Kid to be a return to form for the guy. Now, judging by the previews, I don't really see that happening. But, there were at least a couple moments that looked funny in the trailer, and even if those are the only funny moments (which is most likely the case), that's still better than most of Stiller's other recent films. So will The Heartbreak Kid be Stiller's best movie in some time? Thanks to the magic of extremely lowered expectations, I'll say yes!

Score: 1 for 4

5. You're looking forward to the return of American Gladiators.

Ben Moser: Fact - Is there a better word than fact? Is there something along the lines of, say, SUPREME WONDER POWER FACT FROM BEYOND? I tend to hate game shows dropped into prime time slots, but the return of American Gladiators transcends the prime time game show. American Gladiators is about athletes competing in border-line absurd games that you just can't help but love to watch. It's almost sports, but it can't break your heart the way that, say the Chicago Bears football season can. Believe me when I tell you that there is almost no way that this can be messed up. Believe me when I tell you that I'm on board for each and every episode. Believe me when I tell you that I'll have the theme song in my head all day now just from the very mention of the show. Just a brilliant idea.

Trevor Snyder: Fact - I can't even begin to tell you how excited I was the day I first heard this news on the radio. I was literally telling everyone at work about it for the rest of the day - and being mostly met with blank stares. Philistines. Anyway this is going to be amazing. My only worry is that they will try to modernize it, and make it more hip. I for one am hoping it will be just as cheesy as ever (they better keep my favorite segment: "Ask a Gladiator," where you can ask your favorite Gladiators such important questions as "how do you keep your hair looking so great?"). Also, here's hoping the original Gladiators at least make token appearances. No matter what, though, I'll be there, right with Moser, every week.

Score: 2 for 5

6. Vin Diesel and Paul Walker returning to star in The Fast and the Furious 4 will save the franchise from continual decline.

Ben Moser: Fiction - I don't agree with your premise. The franchise has pretty much been on a level from word go. The stars might not be as big, but the coveted young-boys-who-are-too-old-for-cartoons-but-too-young-to-have-a-complete-handle-on-the-whole-girls-thing market has never stopped eating these flicks up. Many of them thought that 2 Fast 2 Furious actually was better than the original, and the kids my brother works with at a summer camp hailed Tokyo Drift as even better. They watch street racing movies, buy street racing video games, and move on to trying to impress the ladies just in time for the next generation who barely recalls the previous installment to come and repeat the process. All of that is to say that the return of Vin Diesel and Paul Walker won't add anything, because the target audience for this flick doesn't really care about their characters.

Trevor Snyder: Fiction - I'm with Moser on this. It's probably a good move on Walker and Diesel's part, as far as their careers are concerned. But there's no reason to think their presence will help the overall quality of the franchise. True, the only good movie in the series was the one they were both in, but that might have been a fluke. Plus, this will be the fourth movie in the series, no matter who's in it. How many #4's have been as good as the first? Like Moser said, this movie probably would have done fine even without these two (the surprise success of Toyko Drift showed that), so it's not like they're coming in as saviors who will get the series back on track. If anything, it might be the other way around: Fast and the Furious 4 might save Vin Diesel's career from continual decline.

Final Score: 3 for 6

Trevor and Ben split the difference. And while the final result is in the middle of the road I have to say the trip that led us here was outstanding. Thanks to them for participating, and thanks to you for clicking the link. Check back next week for another thrilling installment of Fact or Fiction: Movies!