The Doctor in the Hallway News Report 1.09.08
Posted by Ben Moser on 01.09.2008
No Golden Globes mean no money, the DAG awards nominate movies that didn't make money, and Ice Cube thinks that being BA Baracus is right on the money! All of that, plus CHEER UP, BEN AFFLECK in this week's edition of The Doctor in the Hallway News Report. Read it, or I'll replace all of The Dark Knight trailers on the internet with New Hampshire primary coverage!
Hi kids, and welcome back to the Doctor in the Hallway News Report. How's that new year treating you? Sticking to those resolutions? What's that you say? You haven't even been to the gym once yet? For shame, children, for shame.
I know you're not in the political forum, but I feel a need to address what's going on in New Hampshire right now. It's my column, and you're stuck with my political opinion. There's nothing you can do about it. Unless you just wanted to skip to the news portion of the column. Which I don't recommend, because what I have to say is important. To me. And I'm who matters.
As I type this, the results aren't in, but I'm pretty sure that Obama is going to end up running away with the Democrats' side of things and Clinton is going to take #2. That makes me sad. I like Obama, but I remain a strong Edwards supporter. I like what Edwards wants to do for the less fortunate, particularly as it relates to health care and education. Quite frankly no other candidate on either side of the aisle comes close to making that commitment. Problem is, people are voting on "electability" and good vibes. To many, Edwards still has the loser stink of 2004 on him(remember how "electable" Kerry was?); and instead of just throwing around the word hope like Obama does, Edwards is talking about why we need hope...it's bumming people out. Of course, it hasn't helped Edwards' cause any to see that the only media attention he can grab is for a sick wife or an ill-advised haircut.
What does any of that have to do with the movie news? Nothing, except that it fits in nicely right in front of it!
It didn't have to be this way...
With the Golden Globes losing its luster this year, the big question now is just how much green Hollywood will lose as a result. The answer: a lot. Cancellation of the kudocast due to the strike could cost the local economy upwards of $80 million, according to the Los Angeles County Economic Development Corp. (Same org values the Academy Awards at around $130 million.)
And there will be losses that are impossible to calculate: The film studios and networks use the event to publicize their kudos contenders.
NBC will air a one-hour version from the Beverly Hilton Hotel. But with money already spent to produce the event, the after-parties cancelled, last-minute travel plans being changed and TV production crews being dismissed, the fiscal result will be widespread.
Hardest hit will be NBC, which usually pulls an estimated $15 million-$20 million in ad revenues from the three-hour live broadcast, which courts mostly women 18-49. Instead, advertisers will pay a reduced rate to air spots during the NBC News-covered event that seems likely to generate lower ratings. The network will particularly feel the loss, as it is in fourth place in primetime, its profits well below those of ABC, CBS and FOX.
Well, that stings. Just give the nice writers what they want and this can end. Honestly, I'm surprised they're even running the results "news show." I was almost certain that NBC would just run with another special Deal or No Deal. Ugh. On the bright side, American Gladiators did really well for NBC. Rightfully so. That was some fun TV even without the cherished theme song.
I was so surprised to find out Hellga was never a roller girl...
I digress. I think the news cast may do better for NBC than they think. After all, it's all the patting themselves on the back the industry does and all the boring that goes into celebrities reading their lawyers' names off of lists they bring on stage that turn people off to the awards show. This is just the quick and dirty version. Just imagine what might happen if this manages to crush all previous award shows...
Kidman getting too big to star in The Reader
Nicole Kidman has pulled out of Stephen Daldry's The Reader, citing her pregnancy as the reason. Principal photography on the pic began late last year in Berlin and the Eastern city of Goerlitz and filming was set to continue this month with Kidman. The actress had yet to shoot any scenes for the film, an adaptation of Bernhard Schlink's novel about a teen who falls for an enigmatic older woman in postwar Germany.
I feel like I might catch hell for that headline...oh well. Congrats to you, Nicole and Keith. May no one accuse you of using L. Ron Hubbard's frozen alien sperm to create new life unlike a certain ex that belongs to one of you. I'm sure the child's Thetan level will be just fine without it.
"One last look at me this way before the only pictures you see of me are lumped in with all the other pregnant actresses in US Weekly."
It's all fun and games until we strike too!
The Directors Guild of America announced their picks for directorial achievement in feature film. Nominations include Paul Thomas Anderson for There Will Be Blood, Joel and Ethan Coen for No Country for Old Men, Tony Gilroy for Michael Clayton, Sean Penn for Into the Wild and Julian Schnabel for The Diving Bell and the Butterfly.
The nominations were announced by prexy Michael Apted at DGA headquarters. He noted that the nominated films were a diverse selection without any major studio blockbusters, such as last year's winner The Departed.
No surprises there, even the requisite overrating of Sean Penn that goes so lovingly into every Hollywood awards show. As for the lack of blockbusters, I think that was done on purpose. With the Golden Globes(and likely the Oscars, too) down to a press "conference announcing the winners" format due to no one willing to cross the WGA's picket line, maybe the DGA got together and decided that it would bring extra attention to their show and, therefore, extra attention to the films they thought people should be watching. Sorry kids, but until the Coen Brothers start working the nuance of the fart joke the way that the Farrelly brothers do, America is going to turn down the good stuff.
If wrestling were real, this is how tag team breakups would play out
Action man Steven Seagal and his former business partner Julius R. Nasso have ended their bitter six-year legal battle, which at one point saw allegations of Mob extortion surface. Nasso filed a $60 million lawsuit against Seagal in 2002, accusing the actor of reneging on a deal to develop and produce four movie projects with him. Seagal maintained no such agreement was ever made. Now, in an out-of-court settlement to end the dispute, Seagal is expected to pay his former best friend Nasso $500,000, while the producer will drop his lawsuit. Nasso says, "I'm glad it's behind us. I wish him the best." In 2002, FBI agents arrested Nasso on suspicion of conspiring to extort Seagal. The producer was charged alongside 16 people with alleged ties to the Gambino crime family. In 2003, Nasso pleaded guilty to conspiring to extort Seagal and ended up serving one year in prison. He now hopes to secure a presidential pardon removing the offence from his record. As part of the pair's settlement, Seagal has agreed to write a letter supporting Nasso's application for a pardon.
There is nothing at all fishy about "settling out of court" with a guy who has put in a guilty plea for conspiring to extort you in the past. Nope. Not one bit. As for Nasso, if he wants the president to step in and help him, he's going to have to betray some CIA agents ASAP.
It's too bad that Seagal was stuck in all the legal nonsense for six years, otherwise he might have found a way to hijack all that Chuck Norris mania that spread like wildfire a couple of years ago.
"Great Chuck Norris joke; did you hear the one about Steven Seagal?"
"No."
"Me neither, but I'll bet it was hilarious."
Yep, that was a golden opportunity missed.
NW(B)A
When the news broke that John Singleton would be directing a film version of the classic 80's TV series The A-Team, Ice Cube's name was being thrown about for the role of Mr. T's famed BA Baracus role. Now while promoting his latest comedy First Sunday, Cube spoke to blackfilm.com about the possibility of being in the film.
Would he consider taking on the role? "Hell yeah, especially with John Singleton directing... I wouldn't try to duplicate what Mr. T did, but I will have the same impact on you when you were little watching the TV show. I'm going to bring my own flavor to it and I am going to do the mohawk."
So is he set for it? "I don't know. They want me to do it if all the business works out right. I was a fan as a kid and that would be, not a dream come true, but it's definitely a good thing to do and I would put it on my resume for sure."
I really want to see what Cube does and doesn't have on his resume. I think that would be good times. In the meantime, I'm a little bit peeved that this is going to happen with out Ice T in some kind of transitional role between the old BA and the new one.
"Pitying fools makes my brain hurt...Mr. T shoulda warned me."
This week's installment of CHEER UP, BEN AFFLECK!
You may not be able to attend the Golden Globes and pretend that Gone Baby Gone won everything, but CHEER UP, BEN AFFLECK! You're someone's favorite Affleck brother! From MSNBC:
If you had to choose between Ben Affleck or his little brother Casey, who would you pick? "Gone Baby Gone" star Amy Ryan, who received a best supporting actress award at the Jan. 6 New York Film Critics Circle Awards, tackled that very question.
"You know sure, I'm partial to Ben because I would not be standing here tonight getting this award were it not for Ben Affleck. I wouldn't be having many things in my career were it not for Ben Affleck. So yeah — I suppose I'm partial to Ben," said the actress.
So remember when you're watching The Assassination of Jesse James by Robert Crawford Ford and realizing that your brother was in a movie that got better press than the movie you directed with him in it...at least Amy Ryan is reasonably sure you're her favorite.
That'll do it for this week...
If you live in the big city of New York, please get out there and see Taxi to the Darkside. It could be a very important movie, but only if it gets enough people's eyes on it. For the rest of you, it's a pretty nothing weekend. Although NBC's laugh-track free Thursday is, I believe, the last of the new episodes for 30 Rock and The Office due to WGA strike-related work stoppage. So enjoy those, because I have a creeping suspicion that we'll be into looking at May sweeps before the execs figure out that game shows and other unscripted abominations aren't going to cut it(except American Gladiators, I'm so glad that's back). Until next week, don't do anything I wouldn't do...
(this week's sources: Variety, IMDB, Dark Horizons, MSNBC)
