The Doctor in the Hallway News Report 1.30.08
Posted by Ben Moser on 01.30.2008
The Wolf Man stops moving forward, Cloverfield stops selling tickets, and Ben Affleck CHEERS UP because he's stopped smoking! All this and more in this week's edition of The Doctor in the Hallway News Report. Read it, or I'll bet your bank account on the Giants.
Hi kids, and welcome to The Doctor in the Hallway News Report. We all know 411's Ben Piper is totally jazzed about the return of Lost, and I'm totally jazzed about any show that required writing and acting to put on, but I'm once again going to use my status as someone so important you must listen to me combined with my status as an entertainment media critic and the fact that I have you as a captive audience(more or less, probably less) to vent again. Good times, right?
The 24-hour news cycle is all abuzz with Obama's "snub" of Hillary Clinton and I've finally had it. Let me make this clear. This. Is. Not. News.
This isn't newsworthy, noteworthy, or discussionworthy. When it comes right down to it, it has zero weight against anything that ever happens. It's made up garbage so that Clinton vs. Obama can be billed as a heavyweight fight rather than a political campaign. This type of "news" reporting has left people like Vilsack, Dodd, and Edwards(each of them vastly superior candidates for my registered Democrat vote) without so much as a chance so that lazy reporters can convince lazier voters that they need to pick a side in this stupid "fight."
Off my high horse and onto the news...
Wolfman comes to a screeching howl-t
Director Mark Romanek has ankled The Wolf Man, putting Universal Pictures in the position of holding together a film just after it patched up State of Play due to after the exit of Brad Pitt. Romanek exited the film late Monday night over creative differences. The film has long had Benicio Del Toro aboard to play the werewolf, and the studio just set Emily Blunt and Anthony Hopkins to play the other leads in the film. The studio maintains that Romanek left the project in strong shape and that it expects to set another director quickly. No word on whether a Feb. 18 start date will remain in place.
I really hate that this got any kind of delayed. If any of the classic horror icons needed an update, it's the Wolf Man. Sure there are other werewolf movies out there, but none of them have really tapped into the legend the way that a movie that actually uses the name might be able to. Then again, a director leaving a flick over creative differences may very well be the signal that another horror icon is about to go down the same drain that newer icons Michael Meyers and Leatherface were dropped down recently. Maybe I'll hold off on a lust for a big-time Frankenstein flick until I see how this turns out, because right now we're treating our classics the way R. Kelly treats 16-year-old girls.
Yo Joe, MTV Raps
Dennis Quaid and Channing Tatum have been set as the leads in Paramount's actioner G.I. Joe. Quaid will play General Hawk, the grizzled team leader and Tatum will play Duke Hauser, the lead soldier in the Stephen Sommers-directed film, which is scheduled to shoot next month in L.A. Pic is set for release on Aug. 7, 2009. Tatum's character works closely on missions with Ripcord, a team member that will be played by Marlon Wayans. Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Rachel Nichols, Sienna Miller, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and Said Taghmaoui are also in the ensemble.
This is getting to be quite the cast of people that you never know what to expect from. This thing could now range from outstanding to drive-by-shooting and it wouldn't surprise me one bit. And that's what we like, right? Playing roulette with our nine bucks every time we walk into the movie house! Just ask the people who bet on Cloverfield.
Raise your hand if you think this column is the best ever.
Embarrassing is too easy a word
Paramount's Cloverfield may have posted the biggest January opening of all time, but it's turning out to be more of a marketing win than a runaway crowd pleaser at the box office. Pic plunged 68% in its second weekend at the domestic box office, putting "Cloverfield" in that category of films that rely on a huge opening weekend, akin to a much-hyped pay-per-view event. Yet even among those films, a 68% decline is on the high side, up there with drops seen by The Hulk and Elektra in their second frames.
I don't want to say that the Boss and I told you so, but we told you so. Yes, it did a huge opening. But reviews of it from everyone except the 4 guys who wanted to take us to task for saying the flick would fail to live up to its hype has pretty much panned the flick. It's not the 68% drop off that should worry it, though, it's the other dubious distinction that should worry all 5 of the fans of this movie: even The Hulk and Elektra didn't lose to Meet the Spartans in their second week(oh, and don't get me started on how hurt Rambo fans must be).
The show must go on
Filmmaker Terry Gilliam is determined to "salvage" the movie Heath Ledger was midway through making when he died last Tuesday. The veteran director and Ledger were filming scenes for The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus in London just days before the actor was found dead in his New York apartment. And despite the sudden tragedy, co-star Christopher Plummer claims a "terribly saddened" Gilliam is doing all he can to finish the film. Plummer says, "Terry's throwing himself into the job of trying to salvage the picture. (He's) trying to work out, at this moment, how to continue on. Fortunately, because the film deals with magic, there is a way, perhaps, of turning Heath into other people and then, using stills and I think they call it CGI. Terry was a very good friend of Heath's. He very much wants to go on with the movie, and I can very much understand why. Because he wants to dedicate it to Heath, of course."
It really sounds like the best thing to do. From what I know about this movie and Terry Gilliam, it just magnifies how much the film world is going to miss the actor that Ledger was on his way to becoming.
Crowe-ing about Sydney
Hollywood superstar Russell Crowe will head an advertising campaign for Sydney in the U.S. - after he was named as an ambassador for the Australian city. Crowe - who was born in New Zealand - will feature in promotional campaigns to promote Sydney to the American market and increase visitors from the U.S. As well as Oscar-winning Crowe, other ambassadors who will appear in the promos include billionaire businessman Peter Holmes a Court and world-surfing champion Layne Beachley - both native Australians. Morris Lemma, premier of Sydney's state New South Wales, says, "They are international heavyweights who can influence people from industry, business, entertainment and sport. Their public support of Sydney will encourage people to visit and invest in business, tourism, the arts, sport and education. The Sydney ambassadors will be part of a promotional campaign that will appear in the U.S. later this year."
"I'll hammer your teeth out with my pretty statue if you belittle Sydney!"
I'd hate to be the glass-jawed kid in the booth next to Crowe trying to sell people on a lovely trip to "Sunny Scotland!" No siree.
This week's installment of CHEER UP, BEN AFFLECK!
Casey may be the coverboy in the family, but CHEER UP, BEN AFFLECK! You're not killing your daughter! From chinadaily:
Ben Affleck is helping TV titan Oprah Winfrey prompt Americans to stop smoking by talking about the reasons behind his decision to quit after 20 years. The movie star/director appeared on Winfrey's show on Tuesday, which was aimed at those struggling to give up nicotine. He revealed he once smoked a pack of cigarettes a day and that became "part of who I was" Affleck said, "I finally decided to quit smoking when I was gonna have a child. That was the thing that sort of put it over the top for me."
But when you watch the Oscars this year...you might want to at least consider drinking.
That'll do it for this week...
We all know who's going to win the Super Bowl on Sunday, but that doesn't keep it from being my pick of the week. Maybe the commercials won't suck, maybe some political candidate will shell out the cash to catch the largest available audience right before Super Tuesday, and maybe the game will even be worth it...but the parties and snacks are always worth it. So party hard, just don't do anything I wouldn't do...