Babes, Bombs, and Blockbusters Movie News Report 9.23.08

Posted by Mike Gorman on 09.23.2008

New film projects abound in this week's 3B's News Report. Have we final word on Guy Ritchie's Watson? Which witch is Nicolas Cage's new project? And which Page 3 girl will you get to see this time around? Come on inside for all of this and more including ten superpowers from the big screen that would make the real world more interesting.



They may not be the Oscars, but the Emmys do know how to draw a Hollywood crowd. And they also know how to kill the start of our entertainment week; Aside from Tina Fey's witty acceptance speeches and Jimmy Kimmel's announcement of "Reality Show Host of the Year" cutting to commercial before the name was read; it was a weak night and the ratings reflected it. I will have to ride the wave of happiness at Jeremy Piven winning for his portrayal of Ari Gold on "Entourage" carry me into this week's news. There is a lot of casting news, confirmed and rumored, so far this week and if you're good I will let you know what big screen superpowers I think are the coolest.







Say "Hello" to Michelle Marsh, UK glamour model and yet another Page 3 girl to grace this website. Recognized internationally for her, well, "assets", Michelle has appeared in several UK soaps and also has worked as a presenter on late night television. Her website bio states that one of her true passions is singing and while her current work precludes any opportunities to explore the music industry at this time; She does hope to eventually record and release her own albums. Not sure about her voice but she does seem to have the pipes for it. Enjoy her pictures and towards the end of this week's report you can see her with a friend who should be familiar to my readers.


















News bombs are dropping all over the entertainment scene this week.

Now who says the US is not a giving nation?
Miramax has put into production Muchas Gracias, Bob Oppenheimer, a period romantic drama inspired by the potentially catastrophic crash of an American B-52 bomber in 1966. According to Variety, "The film centers on an American serviceman in the 1960s who is sent on an appeasement mission to a fishing town in Spain after a U.S. military plane crash results in the accidental detonation of four hydrogen bombs; in addition to his role with the locals, the serviceman also embarks on a relationship." The story is based on true events that occurred in Palomares, Spain when a plane crash resulted in the release of more than 1000 pounds of nuclear material. This one has Best Comedy Golden Glob written all over it.

Cage on tap for creepy reunion
Nicolas Cage will be reuniting with his Gone in Sixy Seconds director, Dominic Sena for a demonic thriller about the girl accused of being the witch who created the Black Plague. Cage will play one of the 14th century knights in charge of transporting this girl to her exorcism. The film is titled, Season of the Witch which is not to be confused with the critically acclaimed second sequel to the Halloween films, Halloween III: Season of the Witch/. Which interestingly enough was not critically acclaimed nor will anyone at all confuse it with this new quality film.

Rashomon remake finds new home
Los Angeles-based Harbor Light Entertainment and Tokyo-based Lotus will be working together on the remake of director Akira Kurosawa's 1950 classic "Rashomon." Filmed in English, Rashomon 2010 will be set in contemporary America as opposed to the original setting in ancient Japan. The plotline focuses now on a court that must discern the facts of a case about the rape of a woman and her husband's murder. Harbor Light had previously attempted a Rashomon redo in 2001 but was unsuccessful.

Robbins makes one for the troops
Tim Robbins is dedicating his upcoming film, The Lucky Ones to the men and women serving in our armed forces. Robbins plays a U.S. Trooper on leave from a tour of duty in Iraq. The liberal Robbins was surprised at the welcome reception he received when visiting troops at Fort Dix, New Jersey. As a very outspoken opponent of Bush's administration Robbins expected a stronger reaction to his views. Instead he found dialogue on both sides of the political spectrum in a respectful manner and was able to make the most of the trip intended to help him get into his character.

Vaughn and Favreau, back together again
Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau will reunite again on screen in a new comedy written by Favreau and directed by Peter Billingsley. In Couples Retreat they will portray husbands alongside Jason Bateman and Faizon Love who take their wives on a tropical getaway. One couple is going to work on their marriage and the others just want the vacation time; yet they soon all find that the couple's therapy portion of their trip is not optional. And you know hilarity will ensue! (Did that sound forced or untrue? No really the concept sounds like a winner!)

Wheel of Watson
Several weeks back I reported on the rumor that Russell Crowe had been tapped to play Watson opposite Robert Downey Jr. in Guy Ritchie's new Sherlock Holmes film. Since then several names have been bounced around for the role including Colin Farrell and Gerard Butler. Now it would seem that Jude Law is actually close to signing on to the role. Law and Downey Jr. would make for some great casting in these iconic roles in my opinion. Here's hoping that it actually happens this time.

















Last night the television show "Heroes" returned with an exciting premiere for its third season. The show about normal people with extraordinary powers seems to be heading a few darker paths this time around . As a diehard fan, it easy to imagine waking up one day with powers like those portrayed on the show. Superpowers are not just confined to television programs as you and this week I will be sharing with you the ten abilities on film I think we all would love to possess. I am going to skip flying and super strength as those seem a bit too simple. In no particular order, here is this week's list:


X-Ray Vision
In the first Superman film this is a power that came in quite handy as the Man of Steel flirted with Lois Lane. If not for that darn lead planter we all would have been privy to a glimpse at Lois' underwear. This power would be fun in more ways than just peeping. From the simple act of knowing who is at the door before they knock to being able to keep an airport secure without a machine, X-Ray Vision could be a useful and maybe even profitable tool. The black jack tables in Vegas would be a great place to test it out!


Pyrokinesis
A young Drew Barrymore showed us all what could happen when one has the power to ignite fire with their mind, aka pyrokinesis. Who hasn't gotten pissed off and wished something would explode into flames? Aside from being the most popular guy at the local camp ground, a pyrokinetic could easily take revenge on an aggrivating co-worker by making their computer melt or their files burst into flame. And since the power is relatively invisible, who would know it was you?


Telepathy
Now I am not just talking about the Professor Xavier-esque, altruistic telepathy here. Instead I am referring to the form that manifested itself onscreen in the Cronenberg classic, Scanners. In this movie, if a telepath/Scanner focused correctly they could not only project and receive thoughts, they could make your head explode. These intense battles of the mind made for some of the most interesting death scenes on film. It would be intense and probably evil, but it would quite cool. (No I don't really want to kill anyone, I just think this was an amazing film that more people should see!)


Dream Pulling
You would never have to worry about facing a bad dream alone again if you possessed the ability's of Kristin Parker in A Nightmare on Elm Street III: Dream Warriors. Kristin was able to pull other people into her dreams. She used this gift to help the other Elm Street children put an end to the nightmare rampage of Freddy Krueger but what else might it be good for? Can't afford to visit your family at the holidays? Why not dream up a winter wonderland and pull them into it? Or even imagine what you could save on phone bills. Tell your friend to nap at a certain time and there you go. And who doesn't love a good nap?


Teleportation
As I have said before, Jumper was not the best film but it did feature a bad ass ability. You could go where you wanted whenever you wanted with no traffic, extravagant airfares, or backseat drives. It could even be used for simple things like getting into the exorbitantly priced movie theaters or a theme park, say in Orlando FL. Teleportation is something I would love others to have, especially those friends prone to being late. Take away the driving time and maybe once we would make our dinner reservations. Oh, who am I kidding? They'd be late anyway, just for newer more creative reasons.


Spidersense
You may not know this if you have somehow missed seeing the films but Spiderman can do more than spin his own webs and cling to walls. He possesses what is referred to as a "Spider Sense." This ability is like a form of precognition that let's him know when danger approaches so he can avoid it. A power like this would make the work day much easier if you have a mean boss. Every time they approached, your spider-sense would spring into action alerting you to duck into the restroom or hallway to avoid contact. It would also help you avoid things like car accidents or falling pianos but that is besides the point.


Self Duplication
He was an underused character in a terrible film, but X3's Jamie Madrox is the ultimate multitasker. Able to create perfect duplicates of himself with a stomp of his foot or a punch to his chest, Madrox's power would finally help you get all the things done in one day that populate your to-do list. One dupe could go to the office, another could get the shopping done, all while you relaxed. And don't worry, when their task is complete you can reabsorb the dupe and you would have their memories. This would be a great power for testing out a few dates at a time or helping you prepare a romantic surprise for your girlfriend. Imagine all the home improvement work you could get done with all those extra hands!



Invulnerability
In the M. Night Shyamalan's Unbreakable, Bruce Willis slowly learned that he was not lucky enough to never have been sick or injured throughout his life but that he was actually invulnerable. With this power you could not be burned, broken, cut, or damaged in any way. You could become a true hero and save people from fires, or stand down crazed gunmen. Or you could focus instead on going from bar to bar making stupid bets involving either sharp darts, excessive drinking, or even some fun with a pocket knife. It is a decision I will leave up to you.


Ice Control
We saw what Iceman could do in the X-Men sequels and I will go on record saying I want this power something fierce. Need some ice to keep your beverage cool? Done. Want to cool down your place without excessive AC bills? Done. Dream of swimming in the Artic ocean? Yes even this would be possible with the powers of Iceman. As a person who tends to run excessively warm and loves a frosty drink, this is my dream ability. I'd even eventually work out how to make those cool ice slides he always made in the comics!


The Force
Whether you are a Star Wars or just an innocent bystander to the cultural phenomenon these films have become you are aware on some level of "The Force." Using the Force is not just one power but many all together. They include: mind control, telekinesis, and even lightning bolts. Aside from how cool it would be to be able to do all of those things, I imagine going to a Star Wars convention and scaring the crap out of all the geeks present when I unleashed the Force. The screams of "Oh my god, it's real!" would be worth it alone!

What powers have you seen on film that would make your life easier? How might you use one of the powers I suggested? As always it is a joy to hear your cheerful, supportive comments!












(All information and gossip gathered from Fark.com, Aintitcoolnews.com, Hollywoodreporter.com, Hollywood.com, Reuters.com, Variety.com, MTV.com)