A Little Push - Thoughts on the Hollywood Machine 12.20.08

Posted by Rick Tym on 12.20.2008

Batman rumors and discussion, new season 5 Lost footage, Vic Mackey's latest assignment and more in this Yuletide edition of A Little Push!

Dark Knight Sequel Rumors and Facts


Yeah, right.

Last week it was As the Globes Turn, this week it's As Nolan's Gotham Revolves. The latest Dark Knight sequel rumors spin everyone right round, baby right round, like a record baby and as usual, it's all a load of you-know-what. Let's break it all down, shall we? (Right round round round.)

E! Online started all the huh-bub early this week, breaking the "news" that Rachel Weisz was being courted to play Catwoman in the next installment of the Batman movie franchise. This pile of baloney was lent instant credibility due to the fact that Weisz has some action chops, what with her involvement in the first two Mummy films and all, to go along with her Academy Award Best Supporting Actress for her role in The Constant Gardener. Not stopping there, the major entertainment news outlet went on to declare that Christopher Nolan would indeed be returning to direct the third film, definitely bringing his star Christian Bale along for the ride.

Even though all of this ended up being completely false, there are some good ideas running around in the E!Online contributors' imaginations. Weisz would not be completely horrible for the Selina Kyle/Catwoman role, but when I think of the kitty-cat that likes to steal I see someone more mature and dare I say just a tad higher on the voluptuousness scale. She's a good actress that would bring a level of conviction to the part, but this casting rumor fails to give any kind of warm or tingly feeling that should be associated with such "news." In fact, it seems as though female casting is a kind of Achilles heel when it comes to Nolan and company in their rebooted universe; Katie Holmes as Rachel Dawes wasn't as horrible as many like to think but she sure wasn't that stellar either, and Maggie Gyllenhaal did the best she could with what lines she had to work with, but in the end was more of a plot device to keep the Joker's plan moving than a character audiences deigned to emotionally invest in.

Nolan and Bale coming back, though? Sold! Make it so!

The UK Sun tabloid got even further into the bulls%$t mix when they reiterated the Rachel Weisz/Catwoman speculation and then proceeded to add their own spices to the recipe. One of their fake puzzle pieces had a picture of Eddie Murphy as the Riddler laminated on it (see funny picture above). The other, which would be far more devastating to geekdom were it true, told all who would believe such tripe that Shia Labeouf was set to star as Robin the Boy Wonder.

Can you just imagine all the heads that would explode ‘round the world (read: internet) should this ever come to fruition?

Eddie Murphy as the Riddler is just plain laughable and completely unbelievable. Shia LaBeouf as Robin, however, just reeks of some closed-door executive meeting where the Transformers and Indy IV box office grosses were pointed to and heads nodded in agreement as some clueless producer stated "We gotta get this kid involved!" Thus making it more plausible, and therefore extremely terrifying. Luckily the Push and all its readers know that Nolan has stated on more than one occasion that there is no room for Robin in his Gotham, and even though the bad dream sounds almost real enough to strike fear into the hearts of fans, all can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that "In Nolan, we trust!" is more than just a catchphrase.
If it's trust you lack then the Push points you to the words of Alan Horn, Warner Bros. President, who said this…

"We've been talking to Chris Nolan and what we have to do is get him in the right place and have him tell us what he thinks the notion might be for a great story, but Chris did a great job and we'd love to have him come back and do another one."

"The story is everything and we are very respectful of Chris. We have a wonderful relationship with him and we are going to be respectful of his timing and we want to get it right. Also, I think the fans expect that – they want us to make a terrific movie – we have to give them another great movie."

…and then promptly moved on to shill the next Warner/DC effort, The Green Lantern.

Want more proof? Although the DVD 2-disc special edition of The Dark Knight contained no extras at all worth examining, the Blu Ray version included a little feature called BD Live, which gave purchasers access to an scheduled online chat with the wizard himself, director Christopher Nolan. While he did state during this Q&A that he was exploring story ideas for a third film with David S. Goyer, there was nothing else of note to be heard regarding a sequel, with Nolan indicating that he had many other projects on his plate. So straight from the mouths of the President of Warner Bros. and the man responsible for the most successful reboot in comic book film history himself come these rumor-killers that should put us all at east. (Common sense added in liberal potions to this information is suggested but not adamantly required.)
So, as stated here a month or so back, we should all take a break from this needless rumor-mongering and probably from the franchise itself, just like Nolan and his cronies seem apt to do. Remember, everyone wants to come back, from everyone in the Hollywood Machine executive suites to the creative artistic visionaries in the cheap seats. When the time is right and the story is straight, all the other pieces will fall into place just like they did with The Dark Knight.

An interesting aside on the whole BD Live chat thingy: it's been reported that this potentially awesome extra feature of the Blu Ray disc was a snoozefest. Questions and comments were moderated with extreme prejudice, and not much of note was revealed about the production of The Dark Knight, except for some interesting factoids concerning things like the Joker's clapping for Jim Gordon's appointment as police commissioner (Heath improvised it), Nolan writing the end monologue in post-production (although it was one of the first ideas hit upon during story development) and the Joker's long hair being Ledger's idea (not much of a lightning bolt there).

And oh yeah, Harvey Dent is dead. Just like the script (and the movie) says. Time to move on from wishing Two Face is secretly a guest of Arkham Asylum. (Odds on Nolan, Goyer, the studio or all three ret-conning this currently stand at 7-to-1. Should the handicappers in Vegas change this betting ratio, we'll let you know.)

Other than these less-than-groundbreaking insights, word has it that Nolan was pretty monosyllabic in his answers, even breaking twice to go to the restroom. I know that when nature calls, one must answer, but boredom seemed to be the state of this particular union of fan and director. Can't say I blame Nolan if he's a little burnt out, though. He's most likely fielding calls on his mobile from studio execs along with fans and Warner stockholders in the streets, wanting to know when the goose is going to lay its next golden egg. Just remember what happens when you get greedy and cut her open, everyone. Furthermore, the apparent dismal two-and-a-half hour event yielded by this Blu Ray "extra" was just as yawn-inducing as all the other special features found on either standard or high definition versions. Wait for the double dip, my friends. I smell a packed three-disc release sometime after awards season has ended.

(Preemptive "Blu Ray special features kick ass" argument rebuttal: I know the Blu Ray contains "hours" of extras in comparison to the standard release. At least, that's what the DVD cover likes to tell unwitting consumers—but I've already seen "The Psychology of the Batman" on the History Channel, and I didn't need a high-def feed or an extra twelve bucks to do so.)

Before we leave the realm of our favorite cowled crusader for this week, here are two more kick-ass "For Your Consideration" posters Warner Bros. has released for Heath Ledger's in his role as the Joker in The Dark Knight. If you think I liked that last one, wait'll you get a load of these…


Yes, I admit it. This is where A Little Push's name comes from—or more specifically, from the title of one of The Dark Knight's soundtrack selections. I'm thinking of cribbing this for a column banner. Think TPTB at Warner would get mad?



And here is one for Best Picture consideration, although still Joker-centric…



Good luck to Nolan, Warner Bros. and Heath Ledger's daughter. The Push hopes they all get the chance to grasp Oscar gold. Even if you're not a fan of the film, you must admit that it would be remarkable to see The Dark Knight take the genre of comic book film to an honored and legitimate Oscar realm as serious contenders.

New Lost Footage

Below is the newest one-minute trailer for the upcoming season of ABC's Lost. Look for a season five preview and all the rest of Ben Piper's Get Lost! goodness to be making a return to 411mania.com in January of 2009! Next year (which is entering "it's oh so close now, it's scary" territory—really, where does the time go?) I will be honored and privileged to be taking part in Ben's weekly Lost recap and analysis extravaganza. So without further ado, let the speculation madness begin!



The pixilation of the above promo does not deduct one iota from the sheer coolness of the footage, or just the general knowledge that Jack, Kate, Ben, Locke, Hurley, Sawyer and all the rest of the gang will be coming back to the airwaves on January 21st. In true Lost fashion, more questions are posited than answers given:
• What is that backwards voice saying? (Obviously you can find out by following the link that pops up at the end of the promo, but still a chill-inducing use of the gimmick.)
• Who is writing what on that chalkboard? Faraday? Differential equations? Somebody playing hangman?
• What is dragging whom along the jungle floor?
• It is presumably Sayid that is doing the balcony tossing. Who is the unlucky person he throws to their demise?
• Where did all of Locke's new buddies go?
• Who is that sinister shadow lurking about in the ghostly green glow of that computer terminal room, and what exactly does EVENT WINDOW DETECTED mean?
• Not a question presented in the trailer, but how nice is it to see Penny and Desmond again?

All (or some) of these questions are sure to be answered in the upcoming season, with even more inquiries formed!!! Can't wait to see who picks up the phone when Destiny Calls, Wednesdays only on ABC.

Frank Miller's Buck Rogers?

In yet another entry of updates that don't have a valid reason for existence, Frank Miller, the co-director (and I use that term loosely) of Sin City and director of the upcoming The Spirit adaptation, has been tapped to bring Buck Rogers out of the 25th century and into the 21st with a big screen version slated for a 2009 production start. The Hollywood Reporter states that the new iteration of Rogers will have a darker tone, with Miller's usual depressing themes of corruption and redemption being worked into the story. You know, because that fun TV show starring Gil Gerard, Erin Grey and Twiki needs to be darker, edgier and more realistic.


What you talkin' bout, "update?"

For f@*#'s sakes people, stop Dark Knighting everything! Buck Rogers was a fun show that's fondly remembered by the Push and loads of others as well. Why must all things holy be remade and stripped of the nostalgia that made them so popular in the first place? Are they going to "Gort" Twiki into a huge humanoid robot made up of nanobots with fire-breathing ocular lenses? Will they "WB"—sorry, it's "CW" now—the cast with a bunch of generic underweight females and pretty-boy boys? Will the optimistic and colorful landscape of future America be replaced with black and white bleak comic-book-panel-like backdrops ala Sin City? Will prospective new fans attend regardless, and will old fans even give enough of a shit anymore to complain? (Besides me, that is.)

Buck Rogers does not need to be "reimagined." The series is available on DVD for those that wish to relive the magic. Furthermore, Frank Miller is not, repeat not, the person that should be directing this—or any other film, for that matter. He did not co-direct Sin City with Robert Rodriguez. This becomes quite obvious when reading advance reviews for The Spirit, which apparently has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Sin City may not have been everyone's cup of tea, but was nowhere near the abomination as Miller's first directorial effort is being said to be. The man writes a great funny book, but please stop him from stepping behind the camera again. And to those in control of the Hollywood Machine, please try to keep your bloody hands off of loved and established properties for at least a few months. This is the Push's New Year's Resolution Challenge ™ to you. Three months, starting in January (remakes or retellings in development will be excused) and then you can eat all the souls of creativity you can stomach . Just three months. C'mon—we're all pulling for you.

Vic Mackey Knows Drama

Michael Chiklis is set to produce a drama series for FX that is based on real-life Ponzi schemes perpetrated on the unwitting such as the one allegedly attributed to Wall Street investment manager Bernie Madoff, who is implicated in the fleecing of approximately $50 billion of investor's money through a hedge fund scam. (FYI: "Ponzi," derived from the name of racketeer Charles Ponzi, is just a fancy way of saying "pyramid" when describing schemes, with the same (bleep)-flows-downhill implications.) Chiklis has been quietly working on the development of House of Cards, which he will executive produce but not star in.


One more time. Where's my money?

Most interesting about Chiklis' involvement is he and his wife's victimization in a similar scam just last year. Although it's obvious that it would be preferable to see Chiklis back on the small screen as our favorite corrupt police detective from The Shield, he and FX should partner well to provide a unique dramatic take on fraud, scheme conceptualists and pyramid (or Ponzi, if you prefer) victims. Best of luck to Mackey in his new assignment.

Outtro

‘Tis the season for sweets, company-donated hams, last-minute shopping and year-end awards. There will be no such "best of" or "worst of" lists to be found here next week as A Little Push brings 2008 to a close; rather, it'll just be some good old entertainment headline discussion, as long as there is enough material to be unearthed—even now, in the days before Christmas, the Machine is unusually quiet, watching and waiting to see how their specially-bred awards-fare offspring perform in this crucial season.

Speaking of Christmas, Santa will have come and gone by the time we reconvene. Until then, I leave you with one more bit of Batman-inspired goodness.



I know it's kind of bad, but I'll be damned if I didn't laugh for at least five minutes straight when I first saw this cruel, cruel take on Batman/Bruce Wayne's childhood. Thanks for reading, and Merry Christmas (or simply Happy Holidays) everybody. See you next time.