Ten Deep 03.04.09: The All-Bruce, All-Awesome Spectacular!

Posted by Lucas Huddleston on 03.04.2009

Come in as 411's Lucas Huddleston pays homage to the greatest ruler of them all! Yes, even greater than Priscilla: Queen of the Desert!

Hello, and welcome to Ten Deep: Week 22! First things first…

Thanks to The Former C.W.D.U. (sorry to hear about your grandmother, as well), Angry Bear, and JLAJRC for you condolences for my grandmother's passing. Also, I have indeed decided that I will indeed be doing more columns like last week's, as I liked it. Perhaps once or twice a month, maybe more than that.

And to the dude, I know lots of people that hate Peggy Hill. She'd probably be a good candidate for a breakdown, in all her self-importance.

THE ALL-BRUCE, ALL-AWESOME SPECTACULAR!

Oh yeah, that's right. When I first got this gig, I intended that, for every column for every week, I would make a reference to my favorite celebrity and personal hero (meaning Bruce Campbell, of course), no matter how hackneyed the reference was, or how big of a stretch it may have been to make mention of his name. I actually was able to do just that for about the first seven weeks of this column's existence, yet, soon, those intentions of constantly mentioning Bruce just kind of fell by the wayside as the column moved along. Trust me, that fact didn't go unnoticed by me; however, there was one other thing that didn't go unnoticed by me, as well, and that was that I heard around the turn of the New Year that Bruce's new film, My Name is Bruce, was set to be released on DVD in February. As such, I decided that as soon as I bought the DVD, I'd do an entire column devoted to the King, in honor of his awesomeness and my fandom for him, as well as review the movie. So, since you've obviously read the heading of this week's column, I'm sure you've already ascertained that I have indeed purchased My Name is Bruce…and so here's the spectacular!

[Note: In case anybody notices, I did indeed steal Robert Kirkman's tagline for his comic book series Invincible (the ALL-NEW, ALL-AWESOME INVINCIBLE, in case you don't know). I love that comic and that tag-line, and I do it to merely showcase the fact that Robert Kirkman is indeed THAT much more awesome than I am. Perhaps a proper analogy to that thought would be this: Robert Kirkman is to Ron Jeremy, as I am to John Wayne Bobbitt…which, of course, would make Bruce akin to John Holmes.]

FIVE ROLES THAT BRUCE SHOULD HAVE HAD

These aren't real roles that Bruce was offered, as far as I know (though one potentially could be…). It's just a short list of roles that I think Bruce would be great in.

5. Hero, from Feast

Yeah, it's essentially a bit part, but still, I think that Gulager and company really missed the boat when they didn't get Bruce to play this role. For those that don't know, the Hero character in Feast appears briefly at the very beginning of the film, when he bursts into the secluded, small-town tavern holding a monster's decapitated head (which the Hero presumably cut off), and essentially tells everyone that, ‘THIS is coming to get you.' When someone in the bar asks who the hell he is, the Hero turns and says quite seriously, ‘I'm the guy that's gonna save your ass.' At which point, a monster attacks the Hero through the window and kills him, right after his hefty claim of saving asses. That's a great, memorable moment…though it would have been even greater and more memorable (not to mention a great send-up) if it had been Bruce.

4. Ulysses Everett McGill, from O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Now, this happens to be an unconfirmed rumor that I heard not too long ago, and it's unconfirmed by way of (to the best of my knowledge) never having been confirmed nor denied by Bruce. The rumor says that Bruce was originally cast as Everett, though the studio eventually stepped in and said that they wanted a big name in the movie…and so out goes Bruce, in comes George Clooney. From what I've heard, Clooney actually aped the mannerisms that Bruce had set for the character, and that's all a shame, considering how big the movie would go on to become. Now, as I said it's a rumor (though an interesting one), and perhaps someone out there has heard more on the subject…?

3. Rick O'Connell, from The Mummy series

Don't get me wrong here. I really, truly like Brendan Fraser and his work, and I've been a fan of his since the days of Encino Man and Blast from the Past (which was particularly a great movie, in my opinion). My point in putting Fraser's role of Rick here on the list is in no way a slight against Fraser in the role, and is of a much simpler point than that: I believe that THIS is the type of role that Bruce could really flourish in when it comes to mainstream movies, that being the role of the rough, tough, smart-ass heroic adventurer. Sounds like Bruce Campbell already, don't it? Rough, tough, smart-ass, and heroic? Pfft, Bruce has made a career on that type of character. The role of Rick just seems to have been tailor-made for one such as Bruce, and when you throw Bruce into a role like that, in a film that has the whole subtle, supernatural Horror thing going on…how could that go wrong? Honestly, if they ever do another Alan Quartermain film (or any kind of Adventure film, really), Bruce could probably even fill that role pretty nicely.

2. Johnny Blaze, from Ghost Rider

I'm actually probably one of the few apologists for the Ghost Rider film, as I kind of liked it, in a way. However, I should note that, while I did indeed enjoy the movie and have always been intrigued by the character, I was never actually all that compelled to pick up an issue of the actual comic book. Until last year, that is, when I started to pick up Jason Aaron's current run on the title. It's great, as it lends a bit of the old Grindhouse feel to the book (such as motorcycle riding, shotgun-toting nurses), which fits perfectly in the world of the Ghost Rider. So they should re-do this film as a B-movie, grindhouse flick, and cast Bruce. It'd be awesome.

1. Any role that Owen Wilson has ever had

I really can't stand Wilson, and about the most I can do is tolerate the man in things like Wedding Crashers, which I only watched because of Vince Vaughn's involvement. I put Owen here for the simple reason that I guarantee you that anything he can do, Bruce can do better.

Special Character Breakdown: Ash

When it comes to the thought of what lurks inside the mind of Ashley J. Williams, you really need only ask yourself one question: what drives a young man who's seemingly somewhat withdrawn, maybe more than a little bit shy, and not exactly the most aggressive person in the world, to become the ultimate Deadite ass-kicker, and, in some ways, a chip from the mold of the Ultimate Hero archetype? I've thought about that very question quite a bit over the years, pondering over the structures of various different Hero-type characters. For some ‘Hero' characters, they're seemingly just made that way, born of a truer virtue than most, born of sterner stuff in order to answer their calling towards a higher purpose. For others, their road towards the Heroic was paved with the traumatic, with the blood of their loved ones, a horrid memory that drives them to keep the same from happening to another. For Ash…I truly don't think that such a thing is the case. When it comes to what causes Ash to do the heroic, to do that what most people wouldn't do, it's not because Ash was born that way, nor do I think that it was necessarily because of the fact that his girlfriend, friends, and sister died at the hands of a great evil; in fact, I think it's quite the opposite, as at times Ash comes across as not inherently being a Hero in the least, not truly being all that particularly heroic. No, for Ash, I believe that his unwilling drive to be the Hero is stemmed from something else, something that would be considered a cancerous blight in the virtue of most other heroes: complete and utter insanity. I believe that Ashley J. Williams has unquestionably lost his mind.

Before Ash made that fateful trip into the deep woods to stay at that cursed cabin (and even during most of the proceedings of the first Evil Dead film), there's really nothing all that much that stands out about the man, honestly. A college student that works at a local supermarket (S-Mart, of course), Ash never really comes across as being all that intelligent, athletic, or even all that much of a personality, to be honest with you, as perhaps the one trait of his that stands out above all other aspects of Ash is his incredibly high-pitched, girl voice. In truth, Ash is just kind of there. After the initial Deadite attack on he and his friends, Ash proves for the first time that, inherently, he's not a Hero; while the other male character of Scotty is the one that initially fights back against the Evil and is the one that attempts to brave the darkened path of the woods in an effort to get the group rescued, Ash stays behind, and pretty much just sits around. In one scene while Scotty struggles with one of the members that has been possessed, Ash merely sits on the couch, seemingly in a near catatonic state. In the midst of another incident, Ash showcases his ineptitude as he tumbles into an open-backed bookshelf, and somehow, someway, gets his arms, legs, and head twisted in and around the four or five shelves of the bookcase…which, of course, would literally take a complete moron to become THAT entangled in a hard, stationary object. While Ash may not be the brightest guy in the room, his lack of action in the beginning stages of the film aren't necessarily something that should be scoffed at, as Ash stands in as acting in a more ‘realistic' manner, in a way that I'm sure I would act if I was to witness my possessed friends butchering one another. But still, the fact remains that Ash most assuredly doesn't hold the drive to be the Hero, as he doesn't really take action until Scotty and all the others are dead, leaving only Ash to protect himself, as he no longer had anybody else to do so. However, the funny thing is that, despite his ineptitude at doing everything else and his apparent lack of a true heroic core, once Ash was left to rely on himself and only himself, Ash proves that he's more than capable enough at fighting back against the evil and looking out for himself, even while solo. Perhaps his seeming ineptness in the ‘real' world is more stemmed from a lack of self-confidence than anything else, though that's somewhat hard to determine, as we're never given too much detail as to the specifics of how Ash acted back at home.

Of course, Ash didn't escape the woods or the cabin during that first night, nor did he defeat the Evil Dead, which naturally forced him to struggle through a second night battling the evil that surrounded him. Undoubtedly, that second night (and, thusly, the second movie) is perhaps the most pivotal in terms of the direction that the character of Ash eventually would take; in other words, Evil Dead 2 gives us that moment when Ashley J. Williams relinquishes his grasp on reality, and gives in to insanity. The specific moment as to when Ash goes nuts is somewhat negligible, though I personally believe that it's the moment where Ash cuts his hand off, as it's not too long after that we Ash first begins to showcase his one-liners for the first time…as well as his balls. Throughout the whole of the second film, Ash continues to fall more and more into his own lunacy. By the third film, Ash's mindset has changed completely, as he seems as though not only could he care less about anybody other than him, but he's changed into a massive egomaniac, happily wallowing in his own arrogance. And that's what separates Ash from other Tragic Heroes…once the tragedy has happened, Ash becomes focused only on himself, reluctantly playing the hero, not to save others, but to save his own hide. And if he loved his girlfriend so badly as he appeared to in the second film…who is that woman that he pulls in and forces himself on once he's back in the present? Either that's how far he's gone…or that IS his girlfriend, which changes everything that happened before, which means that NOBODY died out at the cabin. Anyway you choose to look at it, all leads point to the same marker…

Ash is one crazy white boy.

…

And now, it's time for my review for…

MY NAME IS BRUCE

Starring…Bruce Campbell



To me, it felt like it took My Name is Bruce simply FOREVER to get released on DVD, which marked the very first opportunity that I had to actually sit down and watch the thing. Being in the part of the world where I'm located, namely Smalltown, USA, and since the local theater that presides over the larger area of three separate counties has only five screens, the chances of any opportunity to watch the film on the big screen, barring my having to make a several hour commute to either Kansas City or St. Louis to see it, were laughable at best and disheartening at worst. Though, for that matter, I'm not really all that sure as to whether or not My Name is Bruce was even released in Kansas City, as not one of my Bruce-crazed friends from KC had had the chance to watch the movie before its DVD release, either…so, as far as I was concerned even as late as last month, whether or not Bruce was actually released in theaters at all was extremely questionable. However, the film apparently WAS given a limited release in theaters at one point in time, with the film's earliest, initial screenings taking place back in the year 2006, before the movie's ‘wider' theatrical release in October of 2008. So, what happened during the year or so in between the two limited releases for the film, you ask? Well, your guess would probably be as good as mine, and my guess was initially that a whole lot of nothing happened…although, according to producer Mike Richardson, the distributor was so impressed with the film when it was shown in '06, and so happy with the positive audience reaction to the thing, that the distributor gave them more money to do a second shoot in '07. For a low budget film, that's pretty good news, to say the least.

At any rate, MNiB could have indeed suffered from the large gap in time between its original showings in 2006 to its final ‘mass' release in '08 (as you know, Bruce's first directorial effort suffered from long delays, as well…almost twenty years worth). You see, delays CAN indeed be a good thing, as it could give the filmmakers more time to tinker with and potentially better their creation…though in about seventy-five percent of the cases (if not more), a film being delayed is usually quite a bad deal, as it normally entails a potential loss in anticipation and enthusiasm for the film on the part of the audience. Hell, I ordered a copy of the comic book adaptation for Bruce, and even THAT was delayed, as I finally received it almost five months after I had ordered it; by the time I finally had the thing in my hands, my former levels of enthusiasm for the book had been almost halved. Sot it was that in the few extra months that I awaited for the film between its final theatrical release and the movie's release on DVD, I couldn't help but allow just a slight bit of feelings of trepidation and doubt creep into my brain, wondering as to whether or not My Name is Bruce would be even near as good as I had hopes for it to be, despite what good things I had heard about the movie.

Silly me. By now, you'd think that I'd have learned to NEVER wonder as to whether or not I'm going to enjoy a Bruce Campbell film.

The basic plot of the film follows Bruce Campbell as he struggles through his life of crap…his wife left and took everything, he's an unrepentant alcoholic, and he's stuck doing shitty movies. However, in the town of Gold Lick, a group of stupid kids unleashes the ancient Chinese God of War and Bean-curd, who then begins to terrorize the town. In an act of desperation, the town turns to the local Horror film nerd, who knows that there's only solution to the problems, only one way to rid the town of the evil that has beset them…and that's the Bruce Campbell way.

As I said before, Man with the Screaming Brain was Bruce's first motion picture where the man himself sat in the director's chair, and My Name is Bruce checks in as the second film directed by Mr. Campbell. I personally was impressed with the job that Bruce did in crafting MwtSB, mostly because my expectations for that particular had long been tempered before I sat down to watch it, and as such, I felt that Bruce did a good job in his first attempt at directing a film. However, going into MNiB, I DID have expectations, as I hoped that Bruce would step up and out-do himself on the second go-round…though, sadly, my expectations were actually for him NOT to do so. I figured that, when it was all said and done, Bruce would do another solid job on Bruce, a job that would be about on par with what he did on Brain, but I didn't honestly think that he'd do better, if only for the reasons of the low-budget. However, once again, I was wrong, and completely underestimated my hero. Yeah, the film is low-budget and a B-movie, but you know what? In my opinion, if someone sat down to watch My Name is Bruce and DIDN'T already know that the film did indeed have a low-budget, they might not recognize the restrictions of said budget. Now, obviously, the film won't be mistaken for your typical Hollywood blockbuster or anything like that, but Director Campbell makes the most out of what he's got here, as the film looks and is shot in such a way that it seems that Bruce successfully worked around the fact of the low-budget. It seems pretty obvious that Bruce hasn't squandered his time working in film, as he seems to have learned the directorial tricks of the trade through his years and years of being in such films (and, perhaps, he learned a few things as well from friends like Sam Raimi, or the Coen Brothers). Everything in the film looks pretty damn good, all things considered.

Of course, the real test as to the enjoyment factor one can pull from a B-movie is the acting within, as it's either: respectably good, laughably good, or unwaveringly putrid. Here, once again, I felt that the acting overall was a step up from Brain, and actually stand as being a strong-suit for Bruce. You'd be hard pressed to really single out any performance as being all that horrible; most, in fact, are quite good. Interestingly enough, the actors in the film are split into two camps: one being amateur, Oregon-based (the movie was filmed in Oregon) theater actors; and two, people that have been collaborators with Bruce in the past. As a fan of Bruce's, it's fun to see people such as Dan Hicks (Jake, from Evil Dead 2), Tim Quill (the blacksmith, from Army of Darkness), Ellen Sandweiss (Cheryl, from Evil Dead), and Ted Raimi (you know who he is…or at least you SHOULD know) be seen in again in a Campbell film. I should also note that, just as he did in Brain, Raimi steals the show here, as he portrays not just one…not two…but THREE different characters in the film. The man's the Peter Sellers of this bright, new millennium! Raimi does an excellent job in all three roles, and while he's not as hilarious as he was in Brain, it's a fantastic job, nonetheless. And then there's Bruce's performance…but I'll get to him in a moment, but needless to say that it's Bruce, so of course it's great.

As for the special effects, sound effects, sets, etc., I must say once again that everything here looks pretty good, belying the low-budget nature of the thing, and quite possibly much better than what I could have imagined. The special effects in particular look far better than what we've come to expect the norm to be for B-movies (even Bruce movies), as there's really not one thing at all that stands out as being out-and-out atrocious. The monster looks convincing enough, and actually pretty well-done in all respects (though most shots of him are during nighttime sequences)…and even his glowing eyes, which had the potential to really cheese things up a bit, look great and only add to the element of the God of War and Bean-curd. The sound effects pretty much are your typical B-movie stuff, though, such as the cheesy sounding ‘swoosh' of Quan-Di's blade as he twirls it around in the air, or the sound of tires squealing on a gravel road, but none of it detracts from the film. It all only adds to the charm of it all. And as the sets go, the only real thing that bothered me in the slightest was how skimpy and sparse the set for the town of Gold Lick appeared to be (though it was all set up and shot on Bruce's own property)…but the set for Gold Lick still looked nice, overall.

As for Bruce, he obviously plays Bruce Campbell…kind of. Here, Bruce comes off as being the schmuck of all schmucks, a complete and total ass-wipe, and overall crap human being. And that plays into the charm of the film, and the true quality and measuring stick for fans. The whole film plays as an ode (and a joke played on) the whole ‘Bruce Campbell mythos', as nothing is spared. Bruce takes good-natured jabs at not only himself as a person, but also at the movies that he's made over the years, as the ‘movie within a movie' element of the film (called Cavealien) is obviously a jab at Alien Apocalypse. Not even the fans of Bruce are spared, as they come as being extreme nerds who ask questions that Bruce has heard a million times over (‘Evil Dead 4?'), or lunatics. In my opinion, My Name is Bruce stands as being somewhat a love-letter to the man's fans…and it's great.

MY FINAL SCORE (adjusted for Bruce, of course): 9.5

So now, my top five Bruce films stand as this:

1. Evil Dead 2

2. Bubba Ho-Tep

3. My Name is Bruce

4. Man with the Screaming Brain

5. Army of Darkness

And, as something that I thought would be fun, I'll put forth a few tidbits of what I call Bruce-Ku's…or haikus about Bruce Campbell. Remember, they're just for fun, and not meant to be masterful additions to the world of classic poetry…though they should indeed be considered to be masterful additions to the world of classic poetry about Bruce Campbell. Come up with your own, if you'd like, and help spread the word about how great Bruce is.

Respect Bruce Campbell.
He flappa' dickey long time…
Not what it sounds like.

Bubba Ho-Tep rocks.
Elvis has left the building,
Pecker fluttering.

Chainsaw for a hand,
And a pair of large, brass balls.
All hail to the King.

Sometimes I wonder…
Alien Apocalypse?
What the fuck, Campbell?

What Makes Bruce Great

Finally, in conclusion to the ALL-BRUCE, ALL-AWESOME SPECTACULAR, I felt the need to explain myself as to why I think Bruce is so great, and why I hold the man in such high esteem. A few months back, I forced my girlfriend to sit down and watch Evil Dead 2 and Bubba Ho-Tep, as she really didn't know who Bruce Campbell was, or why I was such a big fan of his. After she watched the two films, her diagnosis was this: she liked Evil Dead 2 a little, but really couldn't stand Bubba Ho-Tep. She even questioned as to why I liked Bruce, and what it was that made him so special (to which my answer at the time was, "Because he's awesome! Get over it!"). Now, all of my friends are fans of Bruce, and I had never really associated with someone that didn't enjoy his work before that point; after my girlfriend had posed that question, it occurred to me that surely she couldn't be the only person out there that wonders how someone like Mr. Campbell has attained the vast fanbase that he has, or what it is that makes him so special to so many people. I've thought about it since then, and here's my answer to that question…

Because Bruce represents the American Dream, and that even though one may not reach the top of the proverbial mountain of what they love to do, they should continue to do it out of that same love, no matter what anyone else thinks.

Whenever somebody who's not a fan of Bruce's hears someone who is a fan going on about him, I'm sure it's easy for them to brush Bruce off as a nobody, a never-has-been, a gimmick that was made cool for a second in the span of eternity for the mere reason that he stuck a chainsaw on his arm…that he's somehow wormed his way into the hearts of so many people for the simple fact that he's NOT an A-list celebrity. However, that's not the case at all. Bruce had, and still has, all the tools it takes to make a decent headway in the realms of mainstream filmdom. He's a good-looking guy with the whole ‘hero' look down. Even though his main ‘role' is that of a smart-ass, somewhat dim tough guy, he's a more than capable actor, with a more than capable range, which is more than you could say for the average Hollywood actor. We know that he has the connections…he's best friends with the guy behind the behemoth that is the Spider-man franchise, for crying out loud. However, for whatever reason, fate was against Bruce for being a decent sized player in the Hollywood game. What major, mainstream films Bruce took shot at were failures. Sure, he didn't get the lead in The Phantom…but it's not like that movie made a ton of money or had that big of lasting power, so even if he HAD have gotten that role, would it have made that much difference in his career? It may have, but then again, it may not have. He took another shot at being cast as the lead male character in the film Congo; he didn't get that part, but he still got an actual role with lines in what was supposed to be a major blockbuster. And one could've easily seen that the chances for Congo to have been a big-time film at the time were high, what with Michael Crichton's name attached to it and all (as his ‘brand' was at an all-time high with the likes of Jurassic Park and ER). However, Congo fell by the wayside. Bruce had his own television show, The Adventures of Briscoe County, Jr., a show that to this day, some sixteen years later, STILL has an audience and a following. Why didn't the show last longer than one season? Perhaps it had something to do with it's Friday night time slot, the graveyard for shows that aren't kiddie comedy shows like Family Matters or Full House. If that, coupled with the amount he gets crapped on by most reviewers, happened to me, I probably would've lost all heart and given in by now, to be honest with you.

But Bruce never has. He's an actor, and he obviously loves film, so he's kept on plugging along, living HIS dream. People who claim to love ‘real' film can crap on him and his movies all they want, it doesn't seem to faze him. I can respect that, and the way that Bruce handles himself and his place in the world can easily serve as an inspiration to me. I love to write, and even though I may not get paid to do it or do things that other people may or may not respect…ultimately, that doesn't matter. I should do what I love, no matter what. That's what I've learned from Bruce. That's what makes him great, in my book.

That, and he's awesome. Get over it.