A Fool's Utopia 3.12.09: 100th Column Extravaganza!
Posted by Ron Martin on 03.12.2009
I know it's hard to believe, but this is the 100th edition of A Fool's Utopia. To celebrate, I look at 100 things that I love about TV and movies. You see the theme? 100 columns...100 things....get it? From Star Wars to saturday morning cartoons to Rollergirl, it's all just a click away.
It's finally happened. I'm coming up on two years here at 411mania starting as a lowly weekly columnist and now look at me, I've blossomed into a….um….a semi-lowly weekly columnist? With the exceptions of one week last October and when I made the switch from Sundays to Thursdays, there has been A Fool's Utopia for you to gawk at since April of 2007. The numbers are adding up, baby. In fact, I counted them; four different times. Mostly because I came up with a different number each time. However, one of those times I came up with the number 99 and that's the number I'm going with making this the glorious, stupendous, magnificent, amazing, super duper, outrageously beautiful 100th column! Yay me. Yay for fools and utopias everywhere. More importantly, I've decided that to celebrate this number, for one week only, I am abandoning my regular format. Those of you who click the column and then immediately go to the RETRO, take notice.
For one week only, in honor of column #100, I bring to you 100 Things I Love About TV and Movies. See, it's the 100th column, this is the movies/TV section – you make the connection? These are not ranked in any way, nor are they in any sort of order. Hell, they're not even 50 things for movies, 50 things for TV. It's just a hundred things. I just hope I don't accidentally mention something twice.
1. The Late Show with David Letterman
2. Monday Night Football
3. Independent Movies -- Not the kind of indy films that get shown at Cannes or the like. I'm not talking movies that are without a studio, but still have millions behind them and major stars acting in them. I'm talking the kinds of movies you get for $10-15 at a convention by a group that made the movie for a few hundred dollars – maybe a grand if they're experienced.
4. Fearnet
5.
6. Planet Earth
7. Horror Hosts
8. Turning my TV on late at night and surfing the channels having no idea what I might come across. This is how I found out who Don West was five years before TNA. This is also how I used Cinemax as porn when I was but a wee lad.
9.
10. VH1's I Love… series
11. March Madness with a special nod to the first weekend. At least four games (more often than not six or eight) going at once for four straight days. If I didn't drop a couple of hundred every March, I would enjoy this even more.
12. Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon
13. Whammys
14. American Movie Classics (AMC)
15. Alyssa Milano
then
and now
16. The Five Buck Club
17. The Rise, Fall and Redemption of Drew Barrymore
Drew was a star by the age of five, a drug addict by 12, a has been by 16 and forgotten soon after. Drew weathered the storm, righted the ship and all the other clichés you can toss at her before settling in to a steady career. Drew is not my favorite actress, but with the exception of the Tom Green mistake, it's hard not to root for her.
18. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
19. B level horror and science fiction movies
20. Cartoons for Adults
21.
22. 20th Century Bill Murray -- from SNL to Ghostbusters, Caddyshack, Groundhog's Day, What About Bob and Stripes, Billy owned everything he touched. Even in the movies where he had a small part, he stole the film. I'm looking at you Kingpin. Something happened at the turn of century, but let's not talk about that.
23. Digitally enhanced and remastered
24. The Daily Show
25. Big Fat Guys
26. Twin Peaks
27. Sportcenter commercials
28. The Team of James Burrows, Glen Charles and Les Charles
29. Borat: Cultural Learning of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
30. Indiana Jones many adventures
31. Saturday Mornings -- a relic of a time past, Saturday mornings were once the highlight of a kid's week. It was the only time we'd wake up at 7 AM and not whine about it. While mom and dad slept, there was a virtual cartoon buffet on every channel for us to dine on.
32. The History Channel
33. Andy Griffith and Don Knotts
34. Our Time
35. Horror Conventions
36. Poison Ivy…all of them
37. Mountain Climber, Cliff Hanger, Whatever you want to call it…
38. The Super Bowl
39. Rachel Leigh Cook with kitty ears
Ain't nothing wrong with that.
40. Season Three -- For any quality TV show, it seems like Season Three is the best. The first season is the feeling out process. The second season takes an upward turn as the writers and the actors become more familiar with the characters so that in the third season everything can click. After that, the show's writers get cherry picked, the actors get too big and the storylines get stupid.
41. Live Aid
42. The Many Faces of Kurt Russell
43. Saturday Night Live
44. Video Game Systems from to
45. The Last Episode of Newhart
46. Sweeps Months
47. Drive-in Theater Triple Features
48. Video Game cartoons
49. Pre-1998 MTV
50. Rollergirl
51. Celebreality -- Enough of it to garner a spot on the list anyways.
52. Ghost Hunters LIVE Halloween Ghost Hunt -- Though they've not been doing a very good job at it the last couple of years, I still think this could be a great Halloween tradition. Of course, it would have to be done right.
53. Hanna-Barbera
54. 80s movie montages
55. Mockumentaries
56. $1 DVDS
57. 24 Hours of A Christmas Story
58. Northern Exposure
59. Johnny Depp
60. Bewitched and its effect on a city -- It was because of this sitcom and its filming a few episodes in Salem, Massachusetts in the 70s that Salem became a tourist city and a mecca for all things Halloween.
61. Nick at Nite
61. Stand By Me
62. Punky Brewster then
because I liked the show. Punky Brewster now
for different reasons.
63. Laying on me couch watching old horror flicks until the wee hours of the morning on lazy Friday Nights
64. Any franchise that has four or more films -- I'm a sucker for all night franchise marathons, no matter how silly
65.
66. The Rat Pack
67. Scream
68. The Yule Log
69. Horror Flicks from the 1970s
70. Kathy Bates
Best known for Misery, but Kathy owns everything she performs in. I hope her bad taste in scripts doesn't keep her from being mentioned in the same breath the all time great actresses.
71. Retroscripting
72. Quantum Leap
73.
74. Boomerang's Christmas Party
75. WRESTLEMANIA
75. The Greatest Game Ever Played
76. In Search Of… with Leonard Nimoy
77. NBC's Thursday Night Lineup since 1982:
Cheers
Family Ties
The Cosby Show
Night Court
A Different World
Wings
Mad About You
Seinfeld
Friends
Will and Grace
Frasier
Scrubs
My Name is Earl
The Office
30 Rock
78. FOX's Sunday Night Lineup
Married….with Children
21 Jump Street
The Simpsons
King of the Hill
Futurama
X-Files
That 70s Show
Malcolm in the Middle
The Family Guy
American Dad
79. CBS Special Logo
80. HBO Original Programming
81. MILFS
82. On Demand TV
83. Comedies where you leave your brain at the door and laugh at the idiocy
84. The Coen Brothers
85. Carl Brutananadilewski
86. LIVE TV
87. Holiday Specials
88. He'll never die.
89. The Monday Night Wars
VS.
90. Star Wars -- the first three. Every minute of every one. Even the Ewoks.
Haha, good list, that was fun... I think whammys are at the top though... those jerks
Posted By: Ant (Guest) on March 11, 2009 at 11:16 PM
PTI is all kinds of awesome. But no love for Joe Bob Briggs as a horror host? I loved me some MonsterVision.
Posted By: Lissa (Guest) on March 11, 2009 at 11:37 PM
Enjoyed the list until we reached the "Cohen Brothers" With their history of good films, the "Coens" deserved a little better.
Posted By: Guest (Guest) on March 11, 2009 at 11:41 PM
Ah! I can't believe I typo'd that! I have fixed it - they deserve better. Thanks for the heads up
Posted By: NorTheGreat (Registered) on March 12, 2009 at 12:04 AM
yeah mst3k love :)
Posted By: Guest#4217 (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 12:43 AM
lol at kayne west. That video cracked me up. He sounded like he was reading from something. And mike myers face when he said "George bush hates black people" That was hillarious. Nice list dude.
Posted By: Guest#9918 (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 12:42 AM
The contrast between Mike Meyers speech and Kanye's semi-intelligible rambling is great.
Posted By: Justin (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 12:53 AM
Sigh, of all the Wrestlemania clips you show, you go and do one from one of the best rivalries in the history of wrestling, the Rock and Stone Cold, making me long for the good old days of wrestling instead of what we got now....dammit. Great list.
Posted By: Butters4Prez (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 03:32 AM
Good stuff, though, I'd argue Bill Murray gets sweeter with age.
Now, we get to see the sad man behind the clown make up as well.
Posted By: Marc (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 03:47 AM
99% awesome, however you forgot Titus.
Posted By: Coyotespaw (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 04:14 AM
Sunday Morning Hanna Barbera was the best, made me hate church because it made me miss half of it.
Posted By: Electrichotdog (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 05:59 AM
The mountain climber game is the only game on The Price is Right that I root for the player to lose just so I can see him fall off the edge and hear the crashing sound effect. Great List.
Posted By: Max (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 08:14 AM
Awesome list. I want to thank you for including the promo from WM 17. That promo is my all-time favorite moment in professional wrestling and I still get goosebumps every time I see it. Someone said it before, but yes, that is what wrestling is all about. A simple rivalry with defined and logical reasons from both men. Again, thank you.
Posted By: Guest#9845 (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 08:33 AM
I disagree on "Season 3"
Most shows I know of are best in Season 2.
Buffy (F*** the Mayor... Angel as a villain was better)
Angel (Conner vs Darla... hmm)
Farscape (Crackers vs Cloning your main)
Lost (The Hatch vs the Locke vs Jack show)
...I'll give you Heroes.
Posted By: M:-X (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 08:53 AM
I'm sorry but I can't possibly consider anyone as credible who likes VH1's "I Love..." series.
Posted By: Guest#1134 (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 10:00 AM
Celebreality sucks, otherwise mostly good list. MILFs aren't really a tv /movie thing though.
Posted By: Guest#1290 (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 10:02 AM
Well, I guess I'll add Kanye to the list of blacks who like to play the race card! What a mook!
Posted By: Spyke (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 12:25 PM
Being a huge Disney Fan I miss watching the Wonderful World of Disney. great list
Posted By: Horhay (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 02:23 PM
so, so,so many good choices included here, but this is my favorite - "This is how I found out who Don West was five years before TNA. This is also how I used Cinemax as porn when I was but a wee lad."
Me too...me too...
Posted By: Mark (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 03:50 PM
Peg Bundy on the MILF list?
I love you.
Posted By: Anonymous Film Critic (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 04:08 PM
The CBS Special Presentation is great, but my favorite of all time is the old flying "HBO in Space" intro before their movies.
Posted By: JLAJRC (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 04:15 PM
Congrats brother. One of the best Top 100 lists I've ever read.
Posted By: stevethegoose (Registered) on March 12, 2009 at 04:55 PM
24 Hours of Christmas Story is what the holiday is all about!
Posted By: WMD (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 06:25 PM
"the old flying "HBO in Space" intro before their movies"
OH GOD I LOVED THAT.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGPRWePIUUI
Posted By: Anonymous Film Critic (Guest) on March 12, 2009 at 06:31 PM
Hell yes for Rollergirl! B O I N G !
Also gotta love the Whammys..the annoying little bastards.
Posted By: Frosty (Guest) on March 18, 2009 at 12:58 AM
Here is my TOP 100 - pt. 1
1. Top 10 lists
2. 411Mania.com - the reason for this list. If you never went there, DO IT!! They have articles about Movies, TV, Music (mostly metal), wrestling, BABES!! And ALWAYS have a top 5 or 10 list, where each member of the site will contribute. They update every day with dozens of new articles, and you can spend hours reading through them all. If this site ever gets blocked from my work, I may have to quit.
3. Wildwood, NJ
4. Good episode of The Simpsons - with 500+ episodes, you are bound to get a few bad ones...so when I put it on and there is a classic oldie (funny, season 14 I consider an oldie) I get excited
5. Target/Wal-Mart
6. Brady Bunch - especially when they are singing, or running through an Amusement Park with dad's plans
7. The Royal Rumble
8. Kevin Smith movies - my favs...in order...Clerks 2, Zack & Miri Make A Porno, Clerks, An Evening w/ Kevin Smith (all 3 tie!!!), Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Jersey Girl, Dogma
9. Polish Water Ice - only one I know is in Wildwood, and damn are they good!!
10. Bryers Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream
11. Superbad
12. Extreme...and all things Nuno Bettencourt - OK, so I can admit, I have a man crush and will go to my grave loving everything that this man touches. I truly believe he is the greatest guitarist, singer, songwriter of all time. He can do no wrong.
13. The Office
14. Disney World - even with the $85 admission price
15. MTN Dew - and all the funky flavors they experiment with
16. The Zit Remedy
17. Twisted Sister - my 2 year old son is a fan...I have 3 concert DVD's, and he watches them all with his toy guitar in his hand, mimicking the band, not once looking away from the screen. And he can watch all of his other shows, and when they end he is ok with it, but when the Twisted DVD is over, he throws a FIT!!! How can I get mad at him for that?? This, ladies and gentlemen, is why I love my son!!!
18. The Doobie Brothers on “What’s Happening”, containing my favorite line ever spoken on TV…“Which Doobie You-be??”
19. My T-Shirt collection - although I am desperately running out of room for them
20. Freaks and Geeks
21. 80's metal - everything from Poison to Maiden, from Anthrax to Zebra...Hair Bands, Glam Metal, Death Metal, Speed Metal, whatever you wanna call it if it was released in the 80's it has to be good!!
22. When something of mine sells on eBay...even if it is for 99 cents!!
23. Any Old School wrestling - by that I mean anything pre-2000
24. Tex Avery
25. Rosario Dawson
Posted By: Mike (Guest) on April 03, 2009 at 11:43 AM
TOP 100 - 26 - 50
26. VH1's "I LOVE..." shows - I Love New York, Flavor of Love, Rock Of Love, and I Love $$
27. Lost - with the exception of season 3, when I couldn't stand to watch anymore, but my god did they pick it up! Maybe the best written show in the history of TV
28. Chalups (Baja Flavored) from Taco bell
29. Queen - mostly "The Game" & "Jazz"
30. Chris Jericho's 1st appearance on RAW...my greatest WWF moment ever.
31. Mankind winning his first WWF title on RAW...my second greatest WWF moment ever
32. Any Christmas themed TV episode, especially Happy Days from season 2...best TV episode of any show EVER!!
33. My wife singing the chorus to Extreme's "Star"
34. The Monday night line-up of Big Bang Theory & How I Met You Mother - makes me not hate Monday's all that much
35. My new found love for Speed Metal, Nu-Metal, Groove Metal, Thrash Metal…whatever the hell you wanna call it…bands like All That Remains, Lamb Of God, Chimaira, Killswitch Engage…of course Pantera, Testament…I just recently started to get into this type of music, and boy do I love it!! (And Christian loves it to!!)
36. The Megan Fox episode of Two & A Half Men - not a big fan of the show but damn that was a good episode!!
37. Howard Stern
38. Bands I love that no one has heard of...Trouble, Salty Dog, Law & Order, American Angel, Galactic Cowboys, Porcupine Tree
39. Saved By The Bell
40. The Family Guy
41. Patrice O’Neil
42. Sum 41 "All To Blame" video…their ode to Solid Gold!!
43. KFC Extra Crispy breast
44. John C. Reilly in Boogie Nights & Step Brothers
45. Britney Spears "...Baby One More Time" video - The first time I saw it I was in a Circut City, and I just stood there with my mouth wide open in front of a giant video screen...made me wish I was 16 again!!
46. Clu Clu Land for the NES - one of the most addicting video games EVER!!!
47. Thunderstorms on Saturdays in the summer...I don't feel as lazy when I have nothing to do in the summer when it is pouring out!!
48. Boardwalk food...Corn Dogs, Strawberry Lemonade, Sausage Hero's, Cheese Steaks, Giant slices of Pizza, Cotton Candy, Fudge, Snow Cones...I love the summer!!!
49. Fried foods...especially Fried Oreo's
50. The Mad Magazine board game
Posted By: Mike (Guest) on April 03, 2009 at 11:44 AM
TOP 100 - 51 - 75
51. Phoebe Cates topless scene in Fast Times at Ridgemont High - greatest scene in cinema history!!!!!
52. The Andy Kaufman & Jerry Lawler fight from David Letterman...somehow I was watching this live (I must have been like 8 or 9, don't know how I was able to sneak on the television that late at nite) and didn't know who Lawler was, and only knew Kaufman as that guy on that show my parents watch, Taxi, but was floored when he started cursing up a storm, and threw the coffee at Lawler. Even back then I knew I just witnessed something special; it was only many years later I knew what was actually going on, a work on the audience. I became an Andy Kaufman fan that nite!!!
53. Pearls Before Swine - funniest comic strip ever!!
54. Land of the Lost theme song
55. Jack Black
56. A good Will Ferrell movie - Step Brothers was great, Semi Pro sucked...Blades of Glory was great, Kicking and Screaming sucked...Anchorman was great, Bewitched SUCKED!!! When he is on his movies are some of the funniest out there, but when he is off, his movies are some of the worst!! But his good ones make up for his bad ones.
57. Hell's Kitchen - "SHUT IT DOWN!!" - that never gets old!!
58. The guitar solo from Ozzy's "Bark at the Moon" - Jake E. Lee was very underrated...this solo KICKS ALL KINDS OF ASS!!!!!
59. The first 10 minutes of “Reservoir Dogs”
60. Firework shows, especially the "Grand Finale"
61. Seinfeld
62. Goodfella's & Casino - both a million times more entertaining than The Godfather
63. Led Zeppelin's "Physical Graffiti"...quite possibly the best song for song CD ever made...not one bad song in the mix
64. The "Season Finale" episodes...nowadays most shows make the last episode of the season either a cliff hanger or a really good episode...more so than in the past, now EVERY show does it and I love it!!!
65. "That's What She Said"
66. Sushi - actually I will never eat most of it, but give me a Boston Roll or a California Roll and I am in heaven!!
67. The "Come out and Play" scene from The Warriors
68. The Three Stooges
69. Foo Fighters - more specifically Dave Grohl...the only reason music today doesn't totally suck
70. Vacation - or more so the few weeks leading up to it. I always over plan, over pack and over buy stuff that I really don't need, but the anticipation of knowing I am going away in a few weeks is the best. The actual vacation is fun, but always over so fast, which is why I love the month before the best!!
71. Billy Joel
72. Heath Ledger in The Dark Night - no other actor has commanded the screen like he did in that movie. His Joker is the best villain to ever be on screen
73. Nintendo Wii
74. May-I - best card game ever
75. Woody Woodpecker
Posted By: Mike (Guest) on April 03, 2009 at 11:45 AM
TOP 100 - 76 - 100
76. Any sandwich that is on a bagel
77. Monster's Inc.
78. The episode of The Superfriends where Superman is trying to stop a volcano eruption and gets blown into an alternate universe, where the Superfriends are evil!! They are all wearing darker versions of their costumes, Aquaman has an eye patch, and even The Wonder Twins are evil!! Poor Superman!!
79. John Henry Bonham
80. Sum 41's "Chuck" CD - the most underrated CD of all time. I am not a fan of their other stuff, but this is a metal album with some catchy pop-esque songs thrown in. I swear they are being heavily influenced by Metallica. I was surprised this CD didn't take off the way I thought it would. If you never listened, give it a try, you won’t be disappointed.
81. Anthrax, especially the Jon Bush years
82. A nice giant glass of extra chocolaty chocolate milk, with 2 ice cubes
83. Parking Wars - the Facebook game & the TV show
84. "Disco Mickey Mouse" & "Chipmunk Punk" - 2 of my favorite records as a kid
85. The "Kill the Queen" scene in "Shawn Of The Dead"
86. Three - It's a Magic Number
87. My favorite Little Rascals characters - Farina, Chubsy Ubsy, Spanky, Alfalfa, Buckwheat and Stymie (my all time favorite)...but they made almost 100 movies, and I like 95% of them, no matter who are in them
88. Ralph Kramden & Ed Norton
89. Maury Povich paternity tests - "You are...NOT THE FATHER"
90. Sammy Hagar version of Van Halen. I know I am in the minority, but I like Sammy better than Dave. They are a completely different band w/ Sammy, and I just like them better with him. Plus "5150" is one of my favorite albums of all time...
91. The DVR - can’t imagine living without it.
92. Monty Python and the Holy Grail - I'm not a fan of anything else Monty Python ever did, but I can watch this movie over and over and laugh out loud each and every time.
93. The music from "Superman" - and the best part is one of the features on my Superman DVD is you can watch the movie w/ just the music, no dialogue or sound effects!! LOVE IT!!!!
94. Turkey Hill Sweet & Green Iced Tea's
95. "Neighbors" w/ John Belushi & Dan Aykroyd
96. The King of Queens
97. 3 day weekends, followed by the better but less frequent 4 day weekends
98. Wikipedia
99. Game Show Bloopers
100. Samoas Girl Scout Cookies
Posted By: Mike (Guest) on April 03, 2009 at 11:46 AM
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