411 Retro TV Review 09.28.07: The Muppet Show 2.1
Posted by Ben Piper on 09.28.2007
It's time to play the music, It's time to light the lights...
Jim Henson, his creative cohorts, and their masterful creation, the Muppets first came to national prominence in 1969 as a integral part of the then groundbreaking PBS children’s educational show Sesame Street. The characters grew to be a staple for kids of that time, with characters such as Big Bird, Oscar the Grouch, Bert and Ernie, and of course, Kermit the Frog. However, Henson saw bigger things for his life work, which led to the launching of the more entertainment based The Muppet Show in January of 1976. Kermit the Frog was the central character (which made sense, considering he was the first of Henson’s many creations) as he ran a vaudevillian type of variety show in which he was surrounded by many strange Muppet creatures, most notably Fozzie Bear and Miss Piggy. The show was an instant success in syndication which lead to the big screen Muppet Movie in 1979. The Muppet Show continued on until 1981, but the Muppets by that point had ingrained themselves into the public consciousness permanently, to the point that they are still showing up on people’s radar.
Over the course of the weeks to come, I shall be rewatching and reviewing episodes from the shows Emmy winning (Outstanding Comedy-Variety or Musical Program) second season, which originally aired in 1977. Will the show still stand up after thirty years? We’ll see.
The second season opener begins with the bespectacled Scooter (Kermit’s assistant) entering guest host Don Knott’s dressing room to inform him that the show is about to start, only to find him looking terrified and hiding behind his dresser. Knotts asks why he wasn’t informed that he would be sharing a dressing room. Scooter says didn’t they tell you about “her”? Just then, a large purple ugly Muppet sticks its head up from behind a dressing partition and asks in a husky voice what Knotts has against chorus girls. Yeesh.
Ah, yes, now the theme song that was ingrained into my psyche when I was 7 years old. Sorry, I’m feeling rather nostalgic right now listening to this. At the end Gonzo blows his horn and flames spew forth from it, for which he sheepishly apologizes. I make mention of it because like the opening theme of The Simpsons this changes from show to show, so I’ll be keeping track of what occurs at this point in the reviews to come.
Kermit then steps out on stage to welcome everyone to the show and shill the slightly nervous but very funny aforementioned Knotts. Kermit then introduces a ginger flavored opening number.
The opening number is a song and dance bit featuring gingerbread men. The background dancers are guys in suits and the frontman is a gingerbread muppet. Holy crap, this is campy as all get out and not in a good way. Not very entertaining either, other than the fact that one can’t begin to wonder how this idea made it to the TV screen. (My guess? Copious amounts of pot smoking. C’mon, take a look at what Jim Henson looked like and tell me that he didn’t indulge in some doobage from time to time.) Maybe this would be cute and work for me if I were still a seven year old, but this just fell flat. After the segment the camera cuts to the two old curmudgeonly overly critical Muppets that reside in the balcony of the theater, Statler and Waldorf.
Statler: I know what’s wrong with this show!
Waldorf: What?
Statler: It’s the theater!
Waldorf: What’s wrong with it?
Statler: The seats face the stage!
Sorry, kinda have to agree with them after witnessing that.
Fozzie Bear emerges on stage to inform the audience that Kermit is allowing him to help plan the show. Kermit then comes out and agrees saying that Fozzie will plan his parts and Kermit will plan the good parts. This deflates Fozzie a little before Kermit tells him he’s just kidding and that he should introduce the next act. Fozzie does so by saying it’s time to take a trip to (wriggly fingers for effect) INNER SPACE!
What follows is in the words of Johnny Carson, weird, wild, and surreal. In other words, right up my alley. A green Muppet with pink feathers adorning his head looks into the camera and claims that he’s totally relaxed and tranquil. But that’s just on the outside, for on the inside… fade into a picture of this Muppet running along a countryscape. The leg nearest towards us is not one, but three, which spins to simulate running. As he runs he sings in rapid fire succession about his state of mind… well, short of a word for word transcription (hey, I’m good but not THAT good) let’s just say it’s a really fantastic psychedelic based song-rant that as it goes on gets even faster, which is something considering that it was really fast and rapid fire to begin with. Seriously good stuff, which more than makes up for the lame gingerbread man opening.
Statler: Well, how’d you like that opening number?
Waldorf: Hm? Oh, I didn’t notice it.
Statler: Didn’t notice it? How’s that possible? It was loud and raucous with a screaming thing running amuck! How could you not notice it?
Waldorf: Well, in the future I’ll try to be more observant.
Both Statler and Waldorf turn their heads in opposite directions as the three (actually four) legged Muppet from the previous bit comes charging through their balcony laughing like a loon and plunges over the edge into the crowd below, without either of them noticing.
Statler: Yes, would you do that, please?
Backstage Fozzie looks upon a clipboard as he thanks Kermit for allowing him to help plan the show, for it’s a lot of fun. Kermit laments not planning something calmer for the last segment as a couple of Muppet pigs stretcher the three or four legged (and now cross eyed) crazy muppet past them. Fozzie replies that he looks calm to him. Floyd the Muppet bandleader enters and asks for a moment to speak with Kermit. Seems he has problems with the choice of the closing number, to which Fozzie responds by hiding himself behind the clipboard he’s holding. Kermit explains that the closing number was Fozzie’s choice as the bear tries to sneak away. Kermit puts all the pressure on Fozzie for choosing “Lullaby of Birdland” for the closing number, which causes the usually good-natured bear to growl at him. Turns out that the band loves the musical selection, which neither Fozzie nor Kermit expects. Fozzie smiles broadly, Kermit frowns. Floyd wonders why the bear isn’t running the show, which causes Fozzie to echo the same sentiment, which causes Kermit to wonder why he isn’t auditioning new stand-up comedians. Fozzie wonders why he isn’t keeping his mouth shut. It watches better than it reads, if that makes any sense.
Kermit trots back out onstage to introduce Don Knotts whom then comes out to host the “Beast of the Week” segment which shall feature several of the most hideous, repulsive and disgusting creatures imaginable. He reveals a small antennaed one-toothed big-eyed furball that is actually kind of cute, but it proceeds to easily escape from its small cage, which sets up Knotts’ facial mugging schtick as he attempts to chase it around the set. The little creature hides behind a small world globe, which Knotts says is adorable as it appears to be thinking that it’s another creature, and it wants to make friends. The little furball then rather angrily headbutts the globe out of view, much to Knotts consternation. As Don goes to pick up the globe, the little furball launches itself upon him and causes him to dance and mug for the camera as it scurries around his feet. They then do the unwelcome small animal in the pants and labcoat routine. The little miscreant then plants itself on Knotts shoulder and acts fond of the guy, which causes his capture. Knotts then
explains that it’s important to isolate the little buggar because the mother is really protective, which of course causes a large Muppet to crash the set, snatch the ‘baby” and run off with it. Bug-eyed Knotts does nothing other than make faces and over-react throughout this.
Statler: Well, that Don Knotts is one great performer.
Waldorf: He certainly is! When is he going to be on?
Statler: He was just on!
Waldorf: Oh. Did I like him?
Statler: Yeah, you laughed like crazy.
Waldorf: Oh, good.
Statler: (to the camera) He’s got a great sense of humor but a terrible memory.
Backstage Floyd says the band has proclaimed Fozzie as a super cool dude due to his choice of musical numbers and plays up the fact exponentially. Floyd proclaims him as an honorary band member and presents him with some sunglasses. Fozzie is stoked by this turn of events and turns to run off and tell Kermit, but because he’s wearing the sunglasses, he can’t see so he ends up running straight into the closest wall.
Veterinarians Hospital is next. Rolf, hippy band member Janice, Piggy (who looks weird without eyebrows) and the weird three or four legged muppet from the sketch I liked earlier crack one-liners and bad puns. A passable thirty second segment, but nothing more.
Next is an un-introduced song from an elderly muppet named Burt. (No, not the guy from Sesame Street.) Unusual,whimsical and enjoyable, which is what the muppets have a knack for.
Fozzie and Knotts interact onstage, but because of the shades, Fozzie is looking the wrong way. The bear explains that he can’t take them off because the band thinks that he is hip. Knotts empathizes, which is basically an excuse for Knotts to act like his Three’s Company character, Ralph Furley. Fozzie asks if Don is so hip, where is his shades? Knotts pulls out a pair (hey, this is a family show, get your mind out of the gutter) and puts them on his face and proceeds to slap five with Fozzie before proceeding to walk blindly off of the stage, to which Fozzie tries to help with after the fact. Of course, since the bear is also wearing shades, we hear him fall into the same trap offscreen.
Next Rolf sings “It’s a Wonderful World” to a real life sleeping puppy whom he pets lovingly as he makes his way through the song. Aw, cute, but it just seems like filler.
Backstage Fozzie exclaims that it sounded wonderful, but since he’s wearing sunglasses, wonders how it looked. Floyd shows up again and as he speaks to Fozzie, the bear snaps his fingers like an in the know hipster. Turns out that a member of the band is such a fan of his choice for the closing number, he wants to shake Fozzie’s hand. Enter the band’s drummer, Animal, whom proceeds to stomp a mudhole in Fozzie before Floyd can pull him off.
Fozzie: I didn’t know it hurt to be hip.
Up next is the SWEDISH CHEF! BORK BORK BORK! Sorry, geeked out there for a second. He’s making fishy chowder. Of course, the fish fights back. Brief, but smile inducing.
Waldorf: Oh. Ohhhh-OHHHH!
Statler: What’s wrong with you?
Waldorf: Uh, it’s either this show or indigestion. I hope it’s indigestion.
Statler: Why?
Waldorf: It’ll get better in a little while.
Again, we get another backstage segment between Fozzie and Floyd. Floyd asks Fozzie how he likes his new title of official hip dude. Fozzie responds by saying that he loves it, but he only wishes that it came with a flashlight. Kermit shows up and reminds Floyd that the closing number is about to begin. Floyd responds by saying that since he will be playing the vibrophone, the band will need a new bass player to fill in. Kermit asks how can he find someone on such short notice, but Fozzie, acting the hipster, says he already has it all figured out.
Fozzie introduces the final act, facing the wrong way. ( yes, we all know that sunglasses indoors causes people, or in this case Muppets, to not be able to see whatsoever, so let’s not ask any questions now that we’re so far into the episode and quit while we’re ahead.) Knotts jams on “Lullaby in Birdland” on stand-up bass with the muppet band. Badly. I say that because it’s readily apparent that he isn’t playing or is capable of doing so. The Muppets heckle him as the song progresses, which causes him to “play” even harder. This in turn causes the set to “explode” which leaves Knotts dressed in tatters and looking confused while holding up the neck of the bass. Animal loves it, which we know because he states it.
To close the show, Kermit thanks the individual who helped him plan it, Fozzie. The bear then stumbles upon the stage, holding his hands out blindly, since he’s still wearing his shades. He walks from stage left to stage right, out of view, which provides us with the crashing sound gag. Kermit then thanks Don Knotts, whom of course comes out to take his bow. Knotts wanders out wearing HIS shades and badly pretends to not see Kermit standing there. Floyd quickly follows, and states for the record that because of what occurred during the closing number, Fozzie has been officially and permanently de-shaded.
Don Knotts: (taking off his sunglasses) Oh, don’t worry, Fozzie. Always remember, square is beautiful.
Fozzie: You bet!
Floyd: I’ll see your bet and raise you five.
The 411: While there are a couple of musical numbers that hit the right subversive high note, most of this is middling to in one instance, downright bad. I loved this show when I was not yet in double digits with regards to years, but viewing this as an adult, most of the gimmicks in this instance were lame and forced. Knotts wasn’t given much to do other than to play the fool and mug for the camera which he famously made a career out of. In other words, he phoned it in. While I'm sure the current young'uns would eat this up, as an adult watching this with hopes of nostalgia, I have to say I was disappointed this time out.
