The 411 True Blood Review: Episode 6 - 'Cold Ground'

Posted by Marilyn Yang on 10.13.2008

So many questions, so... much... time... to continue failing to deliver answers. Bon Temps mourns the loss of a Stackhouse, I hate Jason slightly less this week, and Sookie tries drugs and sex. By the way, Anna Paquin's boobs are in this episode.

Gran's in a giant pool of blood on the floor, and Bill grabs Sookie from behind. (Great Bill, scare her even more.) They hug, since I guess it's obvious Bill didn't do it. Sam comes in through the front door to see if Sookie is okay, Bill isn't happy to see him. Sam notices Sookie is covered in blood and asks, "What happened?" Open credits. (I mourn the loss of Gran.)

Detective Andy and Sheriff Bud are in the kitchen pretending to investigate, and Sookie can hear their thoughts (ranging from "I got blood on my boots" to concerns about a serial killer in Bon Temps.) Sookie goes out on the porch for some air, and Sam joins her. Sam tries to apologize for leaving her after their date, but Sookie doesn't want to hear it. Sookie wonders what happened to Bill, and Sam says he'll go get him. Inside, Sam tells Bill to stay away from her. Bill tells Sam, "This is neither the time nor place for you to be marking your territory." Interesting choice of words. Sam blames Gran's death on Bill. Sam threatens Bill. Bill doesn't seem concerned, but notices a cut in the screen door.

The coroner is looking at Gran. Detective Andy thinks this is the worst he's seen, but apparently Sheriff Bud saw a man whose wife shot him in the head six years ago, and that was worse. They question if they should have cut Jason loose so soon, and if Bill had a hand in Gran's murder. They keep calling Bill "Vampire Bill" which I find annoying, but then again I'm the one who calls Bud "Sheriff Bud" and Andy "Detective Andy." Andy and Bud question Bill, who says he could hear a car coming up the driveway from across the cemetery. Vampires have great hearing. Bill thinks that the killer targets women who associate with vampires, but Gran (aka Adele) wasn't the intended victim.

Back on the porch Sookie agrees to let Sam call Jason to let him know what's happened. We see Jason is naked in bed (with the skank from last week I assume), and he throws his phone out the window. I hate Jason.

Cut to the Sookie on the porch again. The coroner and his assistant are insensitively carrying Gran's body out. Sookie reads the assistant's mind, and he hopes she can't recognize him from Fangtasia. Bud thinks that Sookie is lucky it's not her in the body bag. Sookie decides to stay put, despite Bud, Andy, Bill, and Sam's protests. Sam offers to let Sookie stay in his trailer, and he'll sleep in the bar. Bill has to go because it's almost dawn. Sam takes over the "Protect Sookie" post. Sookie starts cleaning all the blood.

The next morning there's a wake at Sookie's. Mrs. Fortenberry brings a tuna casserole, apparently one of many. She touches a pie that was Gran's, which makes Sookie snap. (We hear a few thoughts including someone who thinks Sookie killed Gran, someone who thinks Sookie's gone crazy, and Mrs. Fortenberry spent a long time on that tuna casserole. I find this funny since there are two common facts about tuna casserole. One, it's not that good. Two, it does not take long to make.) Tara ushers Sookie out of the kitchen for some "girl time." Lafayette is included in "girl time." Sookie isn't sure what she feels, but thinks maybe she feels numb. Tara offers to tell all the annoying visitors to shut up. Lafayette gives Sookie a tablet of Valium. I've noticed Tara and Lafayette are predictable problem solvers. Tara solves with yelling. Lafayette solves with drugs.

Cut to Jason speeding along in his truck, presumably late for his construction job. It looks like he's still feeling the after effects of V. He still doesn't know Gran was murdered.

Sookie and Tara are talking in Sookie's room. Sookie says she doesn't know how she would have made it through last night if Bill wasn't there. Jason bursts through the front door, barges into Sookie's room, and slaps her. He thinks Gran's death is Sookie's fault due to her associating with Bill. Tara comes to Sookie's defense (and by default Bill's) saying Bill was there for Sookie when Jason wasn't. She shoves Jason out the door, yelling the whole time. Sookie takes the Valium Lafayette gave her.

Jason walks outside and is questioned by Andy. It's pretty pointless, because Jason doesn't know the name of the girl he had sex with or much about the previous night. Jason gets pissed at Andy for implying he might have had something to do with Gran's death. Jason shoves Andy so hard, he goes flying into the side of Jason's truck, setting off the alarm. Jason drives off. Tara kicks everyone out of the house, including Sam. She and Lafayette talk about all the food that is leftover. "What the fuck is it with white people and Jello?" Lafayette asks. Who knows, but they have a conversation about how the food has bad ju ju. (For example, the person who made the cornbread was scared, so there's fear in the cornbread. Tara thinks it tastes fine.)

Sookie is resting in her room when a pair of hands starts choking her. I'm suspecting Sam, because they're definitely man hands, and it's definitely a man with a blue shirt. Sookie can barely utter the word "Bill," and we see Bill asleep (in the floor). He wakes up suddenly, but realizes he can't go outside because the sun is still up. We see a shot of it getting dark. Tara decides to check on Sookie, and Bill zips through the front door and wakes Sookie up with some shaking. Sookie doesn't know what's going on, and Bill says he had a dream. Bill actually beat Tara up the stairs, and I expected her to start yelling at Bill, but she didn't. Bill stands outside the house and has a bottle of Tru Blood. Recurring Dog has a seat next to him.

The next morning everyone's at the cemetery. Everyone is nicely dressed except Jason, who looks like he slept in his suit. The coroner's assistant (I think) wheels an old guy in a wheelchair up to where Jason and Sookie are sitting. His name is Uncle Bartlet, and he was Gran's brother. Sookie wants to know what Uncle Bartlet's doing there since he hasn't been a part of the family in a long time. Jason tells Sookie to give the man a break, which is really nice coming from the guy who slapped his own sister and blamed her for their grandmother's death. Sookie tries to speak at Gran's funeral, but can hear people's thoughts. (It's more of the same, blaming Sookie, pitying Sookie... until Sookie tells all of them to shut the fuck up.) Sookie runs off. Jason follows her. Tara's mom gets up to speak, much to Lafayette and Tara's dismay. Surprisingly, Tara's mom poignantly says that Gran took care of Tara when she couldn't, and Gran was a good woman. I thought it was much nicer than, "Shut the fuck up, all of you!"

Jason's caught up to Sookie. Sookie yells at Jason for inviting Uncle Bartlet. Jason says that Gran and Uncle Bartlet's issues don't matter because family is about forgiving one another. Sookie says Jason doesn't know what he's talking about (but we still don't know what happened between Gran and Uncle Bartlet.) Jason says all they've got is each other. Sookie says they have nothing, and runs off, leaving Jason behind. Okay, I do feel a little sorry for Jason.

Back to Gran's funeral. People are leaving, and Tara confronts her mom. This is the first time they've seen each other since Tara's mom hit Tara on the head with a bottle. Tara tells her mom that Gran actually called social services on her twice, and Tara's mom hated Gran. Tara's mom says that she has a demon inside of her, and that's why she did all those terrible things. Tara laughs in her face. Tara's mom says exorcising the demon takes a lot of money. Tara leaves her. Tara's mom says after her, "You're all I've got."

Sookie's still wandering the cemetery, and finds Bill's grave. Meanwhile, everyone's leaving and Jason's still dealing with the after effects of V. (Apparently everything is too bright and kinda flashy.) Jason is sweating like a whore in church, and gets in his truck. He almost takes another blotter with V on it, but drops it out his window. Then he changes his mind and tries to find it among all the grass, but can't. For a few seconds I almost wanted to applaud him for doing something resembling right, but then Jason had to ruin it by being Jason.

Cut to Sookie watching Gran's casket getting lowered into the ground. Sam says he liked Sookie's speech, especially the part where she told the whole town to shut the fuck up. I laughed out loud. This is more like the Sam from the earlier episodes, as opposed to the nastier turn he took last week at the end of their date. Sam offers to walk Sookie home, and she takes his arm. He offers to find a stupid movie of some sort on TV, but Sookie would rather be alone. Tara walks up the driveway. Sam and Tara both don't want to be alone. Sookie's in the kitchen. She gets Gran's pie out. (It's pecan pie.) Sookie cries and eats the pie straight out of the pan. I think this scene is supposed to be a lot more moving than it actually is. I equate eating pie and crying with eating a pint of ice cream and being bitter and single. But I guess if you go back to Lafayette's theory of a cook's feelings being incorporated into the food she cooks, Gran's pecan pie is filled with all the nice qualities (kindness, open-mindedness) about Gran that even I could like. That, and Sookie is supposed to be emotionally numb, so I'll accept that this is the most emotional Sookie will get for now.

Tara and Sam pull up to the motel where Tara's staying. (It looks like a motel. Or really shoddy apartments. Tara has a very large neighbor named Roger.) Sam thinks Tara always tries to pick a fight. He tries to leave, but Tara stops him. They both need someone in their lives, so they start making out.

Back to Sookie in the kitchen. She's eaten the whole pie now. Sookie changes out of her dress from the funeral, and into some white nightgown that is nicer than most of the clothes I own. She runs across the cemetery to Bill's, and Bill throws open his doors. Bill and Sookie start making out and he carries her inside.

Sam and Tara just finished having sex, and Tara bolts on Sam suddenly after overhearing a neighbor saying she's always loved the person she's with.

The Skank from Last Week is having sex with Jason, and tells him she loves him. Luckily, her back is turned to Jason, so she can't see that he's actually miserable and on the verge of tears.

Bill and Sookie get to business, and Bill takes off her dress. (Rejoice, viewers who've always wanted to see Anna Paquin's boobs. Your day has come.) We hear that familiar click noise of Bill's extra pointy teeth coming out. Sookie is okay with this, and they keep kissing.

It turns out Tara has come home to her mother.

Bill and Sookie are having sex, and Sookie willingly offers her neck to Bill. He tears into her neck and starts feasting away. It's really graphic.


Favorite quotes:
"Nothing says 'I'm sorry' like a tuna cheese casserole."
"You's a stupid bitch, Jason Stackhouse."

The 411: I expect and hope this week's episode is meant to set up next week's episode, since there seems to be a pattern of "slower episode" followed by "insane episode where a lot of shit happens." Granted, lots of things happened in this episode, but nothing was resolved. We still have lots of questions, and a few new ones. When are Bud and Andy going to finish questioning Jason? Who was choking Sookie, and how do you not remember someone choking you even when you're on Valium? What the hell happened between Uncle Bartlet and Gran? Why did the pecan pie filling look so weird? Will they please resolve the thing with Recurring Dog already? That bite Bill gave Sookie at the end of the episode looked life threatening... Resolve something! Give us some answers! Overall, I would consider "Cold Ground" a pretty mediocre episode compared to all the others so far, but at least I am starting to develop a very small amount of sympathy for Jason.

Final Score:  6.0   [ Average ]