411 How I Met Your Mother Review: S04E07 'Not A Father's Day'

Posted by Michael Tyner on 11.11.2008

Lily & Marshall think about kids, Barney revels in not having any. . .

This week we start off at McClaren's where the group is having a drink, and Barney thinks that none of the girls at the bar are hot. Since Ted is single and now, once again, the wing man he suggests that any one of the girls from a group sitting behind them is totally hot; even Robin and Lily agree. But Barney disagrees, and explains that the group of girls are using what is known as the 'Cheerleader Effect', which is when a group of girls is only hot collectively. They take a closer look at each girl and realize that most of them aren't very attractive, seeing eyebrows that need to be pluced and horrible teeth abound.

Barney's iPhone rings and he answers, having a clam conversation with whoever is on the other end. He says they'll be in touch, hangs up, and tells the group, "Huh. . . I might be a dad." Distraught, Barney takes off, asking "who in the world would want kids?" Of course, somewhat-newlyweds Marshall and Lily are coming down with baby fever. They talk it over for a moment on the couch and start to go at it. . . but Robin is living on their couch, and she quickly puts a stop to it. Deciding they need time alone, they ask Ted if Robin can stay with him so Lily can cook a special dinner. . . just dinner.

Next we see Barney on his knees praying at a church, begging God to get him out of this when his iPhone rings. The girl tells him that he isn't going to be a father, and he runs off to dance in the streets. He dances all the way to the office where Marshall is at work, ready to go home for his night with Lily. But his boss, playing by the dad from The Wonder Years, comes in to remind Marshall of their conference call for a merger with a company in China. Marshall thought it was a breakfast meeting, and it is. . . breakfast in Chine.

He has to call Lily and tell her he isn't coming home, and she starts in on the wine and calls Ted & Robin over to help decide whether or not she is ready to have a baby. Already concerned that Marshall is only seeing the cute parts of having a baby, Lily thinks about when their neighbors came over with their new baby; while Marshall plays with the baby, his mother tells Lily about sleepless nights and lack of sex. . . because of the baby. Marshall just plays with the baby's sock, making baby talk while Lily looks on concerned.

Ted argues that no one ever thinks they are ready to be a parent, but Robin says its a smart move to question having a child. She says that all of Lily's dreams will have to be put on hold, and that Ted is so pro-children because he already acts like a dad. He tells lame jokes ("What do you get when you cross a canary with a lawnmower? Shredded tweet!"), he acts like a dad at restaurants, and he is always the one giving lectures to everyone else.

Meanwhile, Barney has had all sorts of Not A Father's Day merchandise printed up, including mugs and "Who is NOT your Daddy" t-shirts. He convinces some co-workers into celebrating at the bar with him, and they all revel in the fact that they don't have kids.

Lily, getting drunker by the minute, continues to listen to Ted & Robin argue their points. Ted thinks that Robin is afraid of babies, even letting them sniff her finger before holding a baby because she didn't want it to bite. While Ted and Robin start to argue, Lily has finished off a bottle of wine and snuck away to Marshall's office. Marshall finds her, laying on his desk, and she greets him by saying, "Put a baby in me, Marshall," and knocking his computer screen to the floor

Ted and Robin head out to find Lily, and while Robin talks about why she doesn't like kids we see Lily in Marshall's office acting like the babies Robin describes. They make a mess, which Lily does by pulling files out everywhere; they need their bottles, and Lily is downing another bottle of wine; they cry, which Lily does when Marshall takes away the bottle of wine; they spit up, which Lily does after drinking too much.

Barney is at the bar, welcoming another fatherless dude to the Not A Father club by swearing him in on a box of condoms. Ted and Robin show up, still arguing, while Lily makes a mess of Marshall's conference call. Robin looks in the bathroom, and while she is gone Ted answers her phone and finds the baby sock in her purse.

Robin isn't sure why she took it, she's been having a rough time; Ted suggests she stay with him in the spare bedroom while she looks for a new job and a new apartment. Now we know how/why Robin is living with Ted for his birthday this year. Back at the office, Lily is spouting out one drunken idea after another and, like always, she passes out on the taxi ride to go out dancing.

Barney heads over to Ted & Robin's table to talk about Not A Father's Day, but they point out to him that all of the guys celebrating with him are suffering from the Cheerleader Effect; they're not fathers not because they choose not to be, they're not fathers because no one would ever sleep with them.

The next morning, Lily has been making chocolate chip pancakes for Marshall (and apology bacon). She apologizes, and tells Marshall that the way he took care of her the night before makes her sure he'll be a good father. But Marshall tells her that he isn't ready for kids with all the hours he is working, and they both decide that now is not the time for kids. They decide to go have protected sex, but Lily asks if Marshall wants to finish his bacon first. "You are the perfect woman," is his response.

And to close out this weeks episode, after finding the baby sock in Ted & Robin's booth, Barney has made his way to a karaoke bar where he is sobbing while singing "Cats In The Cradle." Awesome!

The 411: This was one of the funniest episodes of the season, with Barney in near-top form and the classic sight unseen gag with Lily outside the conference room while Marshall flubbed the conference call. We also know why Ted & Robin are living together during Ted's birthday this year, as was alluded to in an episode last season; maybe this year we'll learn the real story of The Goat!

Final Score:  9.0   [  Amazing ]