It doesn't make sense. It makes its own sense. And it's good.
"Underworld: Evolution" Review
Kate Beckinsale- Selene
Scott Speedman- Michael
Tony Curran- Marcus
Derek Jacobi- Alexander Corvinus
Bill Nighy- Viktor
Michael Sheen- Lucian
Shane Brolly- Kraven
Steven Mackintosh- Tanis
Directed by Len Wiseman
Screenplay by Len Wiseman, Danny McBride, (also characters) and Kevin Grevioux (characters)
Distributed by Screen Gems
Rated R for pervasive strong violence and gore, some sexuality/nudity and language
Runtime- 105 minutes
Website: < href=http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/underworldevolution/
The mere idea of making a movie about vampires and werewolves beating the crap out of one another sure sounds good. Bloodsucking human like bat descendants versus seven-foot-tall-even- hunched-over hairy monsters also with mouth filled with razor teeth and you have something that could work and work well. Add guns and explosions, hip and edgy leather clad martial arts kung fu fights, British character actors, and ambiance that directly rips off "The Matrix," "Blade," and twin gun hero John Woo movies (while also directly stealing a scene from Albert Pyun's "Nemesis") and you have cobbled up even greater expectations and the chance to make something highly memorable, jaw dropping, awe inspiring, and ultimately pants crapping. Or it could all just blow. So, in 2003, someone tried to be successful. Len Wiseman, to be exact. He, along with Danny McBride and Kevin Grevioux, made "Underworld," a movie that depicted an ongoing, centuries long war between vampire "Death Dealers" and the savage "lycans" (werewolves). Kate Beckinsale starred as Selene, a super efficient lycan smasher who, after dispensing countless full moon monsters with high kicks, side kicks, chops and gouges and about ten thousand rounds of "ultraviolet" bullets, and then standing around all cool looking while other people walk in and out of rooms for no other reason than it supposedly looks cool, exists through some convoluted plot points so she can then reanimate Viktor the vampire elder (Bill Nighy) for some reason, fall in love with a unique vampire/lycan hybrid named Michael (Scott Speedman), kill more lycans, kill some fellow Death Dealers because of more convoluted plot points, and then sword fight Shaun's step dad and cut the top part of his head off because he's a bad guy. If any of it made any sense to you, you probably liked it (this reviewer is among them). If you didn't understand it, you probably didn't like it (although you may have enjoyed the many fighting and gore spectacles). The sequel, "Underworld: Evolution," made by the same crew and actors, continues the "story" from the first flick's climax. The movie adds some armored knights on horseback back story and includes some elaborate effects heavy monster fights, but it brigs along the same problem as the first movie: if you can actually follow what the hell is going on, the movie will be that much better for you. If not, you're screwed.
It all starts with a red on black scroll about the first vampire and werewolf way back when, twin brothers named Marcus and William. It then moves directly to 1202 AD with Lucian (Michael Sheen) and Viktor (Nighy, coming back) entering a village presumably ravaged by a werewolf. Lucian and Viktor are weirded out by the eerie quiet and the piles of massacred villagers. They decide to burn everything before the people "start turning." Sadly, Lucian and Viktor don't act fast enough. Quite quickly, dead people rise, they become lycans, and gory violence ensues. William, the main lycan, is on the premises. More violence ensues and the vampires use crossbows capable of firing chains with hooks to subdue the head lycan. Lucian is upset as he doesn't want William hurt any further. He makes a deal with Viktor where William will be locked away and Marcus will be under Viktor's influence forever (although, there could be a bit of confusion on this reviewer's part. Marcus and Lucian look the same. Perhaps he mixed these specific points up. So, if he did, he apologizes. He needs a scorecard or a program to keep track of this stuff sometimes).
Shoot forward to the present, again, a few hours after the first movie, and Selene and Michael are entering a Death Dealer safe house. Selene needs to reload her guns and get supplies and Michael needs to feed (because if he doesn't he will die, and he doesn't want to go off and kill humans because that's a big no no. It sucks being a vampire. Good God how cheap is that?). Meanwhile, because blood dripped into his high tech stone tomb, Marcus (Tony Curran) flies out of the ground and starts kicking butt. With huge wings and all kinds of sharp appendages to kill things with, Marcus wipes out the secondary villain from the first movie, Kraven (Shane Brolly) and somehow obtains the memories of those he's killed. Marcus realizes that he has to find something. He figures out where Selene and Michael are hiding and goes after them. Selene is off in the woods doing stuff and Michael is hungry. Despite his lover (Selene and Michael have quite the pale white skin pelvic centric nary a nipple sex scene) telling him not to leave the safe house, Michael ventures out to a local human bar restaurant and orders some food. Recognized by the Eastern European police via a television news bulletin and throwing up the food he ordered (the man needs blood, not noodle covered meat) Michael escapes into the woods after a scuffle. The police follow. Selene hears the commotion, beats the crap out of the police, and rescues Michael. And then Marcus shows up. The big butt flying monster swoops down and starts fighting Michael. Michael turns into a thinner Lou Ferrigno as the Hulk (unique vampire/lycan hybrids tend to do) and fights back. Marcus wants the gold circle on Michael's necklace. Selene and Michael narrowly escape and have to figure out precisely what the hell is going on. Why is Marcus after the necklace?
And so the story goes on, chase and fight, chase and fight, and a few "in-story" revelations. There's also a big oil tanker resembling a SHIELD Hellicarrier, which is the mobile command center of one Alexander Corvinus (Derek Jacobi) who has his own human commando force running around using high tech hockey puck grenades to blow up the evidence of the vampire/lycan war. Corvinus wants to know what the deal is, too, with Marcus and the amulet gold circle thing. Just what the hooha is going on here? Where is this all leading?
Kate Beckinsale is quite the action hero. She hasn't missed a step since the first movie, although she still looks a tad awkward holding two handguns at the same time. She manages to keep her striking face unchanging and act solely through her devastating eyes. And she's got quite the voice. And the whole leather thing is appreciated. Scott Speedman does a decent job as Michael. If it's actually him under the dark monster hybrid makeup then he did an above decent job. He also mostly acts through his eyes (often covered with jet black contacts) and has great chemistry with Beckinsale. This reviewer wouldn't be surprised if they make a movie just about him. They could do a hybrid Hulk like thing.
The rest of the cast all does an okay job. They don't get to show off much in the way of personality (the lone exception is Steven Mackintosh's Tanis, an exiled vampire guarded by lycans who has wild blood sex threesomes with women Meat Loaf cast off in "BloodRayne"). They're all very serious. Above all else, the dark seriousness of everyone involved makes the movie more "believable." Even if the actors aren't too sure about what's going on, they're all in the moment and they believe what they're saying. It's all about mood. Levity can be a good thing, but here breaking the mood is bad (that's probably why the first movie worked so well. Even when it made no sense we believed that the people involved believed what they were doing). Sometimes you just don't need to laugh.
"Underworld: Evolution" is a decent horror action movie. Again, if you can make sense of it you'll enjoy it more that if you don't but get off on the action set pieces. This reviewer has read that there may be a second sequel, which will actually be a prequel delving more into the whole Middle Ages thing. It could be cool, but Wiseman and the rest may be better off doing another "present day" story that somehow makes the previous two movies clearer. Wiseman is a competent director, but this reviewer just isn't sure that Wiseman can make a Middle Ages vampire/werewolf war movie watchable without lots of gunfire. Unless he can come up with some kind of funky "lost continent" technology for them all to use. Prove this reviewer wrong, Les. We need more cool action horror movies like this.
Go see "Underworld: Evolution." It's pretty good. It's got blood and guns and nudity in it. Go do it.
The 411: The vampire/lycan war continues in “Underworld: Evolution,” the sequel to the 2003 flick “Underworld.” It’s chock full off cool blood and guts and action scenes, and, while confusing at times, it’s worth giving a shot. If you liked the first one, you’ll likely like this one. Likely. If you don’t, just watch the beautiful British woman in black leather beat the crap out of people. That never gets old. And watch for the “WCW Uncensored” fight in the back of the pick up truck. Which one do you all think is the Blacktop Bully?
