The Singles Guy 04.08.09: Boom, Boom, Fail!

Posted by Jacob Crogie on 04.08.2009

The Black Eyed Peas still suck! In other news the Fleet Foxes and Cage The Elephant do not...This week we have the latest from the three aforementioned groups along with a great collaboration between Keri Hilson, Ne-Yo and Kanye. All this and more all you have to do is click! DO IT!

Class is almost done, and I couldn't be happier...by the way, if you are reading this and live in Ontario, support Tim Hudak for leader of the Progressive Conservative Party of Ontario. Win. Enough small talk...I got beer to drink so let's get this done quickly.

Black Eyed Peas- "Boom Boom Pow"

I generally despise the Black Eyed Peas and their inoffensive and incredibly chilidish brand of dance/hip-hop. Their lyrics are as always just incredibly stupid. If you thought "My Humps" was bad, wait for this one with such winners as "I'm so 3008 / you're so two thousand and late". Wow. Poetic. Even the name of the song is pathetic..."Boom Boom Pow"...could it be anymore simplistic? Oh well...move on to the actual music, for it is there that Will.i.am flexes some mustle. The track has some bass power, with limited positives elsewhere. Billboard is all over this track, but to me it seems childish and lacking the power of REAL dance music.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 0.5/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "Bring The Noise"- Public Enemy vs Benny Benassi (Pump-Kin Remix)




Jason Mraz ft. Colbie Caillat- "Lucky"

Chalk me up as someone who actually fell in love with Mraz's simplistic pop stylings and his smash "I'm Yours". The problem that I thought plagued that song in comparison with the original version, was overproduction. It's more of the same here, he seems to come off as a reggae pop writer who is leaning far too much in the pop direction. I find Colbie Caillat barely passable to listen to, and that trend continues here. The thematic content is, as with most pop songs, love. Something about being in love with your best friend and all that drivel. However, Mraz shows a flair for lyrics that allow him to tackle the theme with limited use of cliches. All in all, not a horrible song, but not something that I find incredibly appealing.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 3/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "I'm Yours"- Jason Mraz (Original Acoustic Version)




Keri Hilson ft Kanye West & Ne-Yo- "Knock You Down"

This song surprised me considering the three artists involved. Keri Hilson who seems to be on every crappy rap compilation when someone is in need of a female vocalist, and whose first single "Turning Me On", while growing on me, is still not very good. Then you add Ne-Yo, who has only impressed me with one of his tracks, "Mad", which came out earlier in the year. Finally you throw in some Kanye, the master of autotune and increased egocentrism. The result was surprising, Keri kicks ass on this track showing some solid range and nails the hook which is catchy as hell. Furthermore, Kanye RAPS! KANYE RAPS! That in itself is enough to make me listen to this track over and over again...NO AUTOTUNE! And Ne-Yo...well...he is kind of there, but doesn't drag it down. The instrumentation has solid bass, however the cymbal rolls get a little old after the first couple of minutes. Still a solid track, a remix should crop up in the clubs, and I would predict solid chart performance for this single.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 4/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "The Way I Are"- Timbaland ft Keri Hilson & D.O.E.




Ne-Yo- "Part Of The List"

More Ne-Yo! YAY.? Well, this track isn't a total loss although the overly poppy production in areas just annoys me...STOP WITH THE CHIME ROLLS. There is no reason to add that into a track that is decidely retro. Ne-Yo really brings the heat here, performing to his full capability crooning out lyrics worthy of Boyz II Men with the chutzpah of a champion. Lyrically, it's another pretty stock love ballad, it is in the instrumentation that this track really shines. Very solid mix of the old and the new, allowing Ne-Yo to impress me once again, this is a shade behind "Mad" in terms of quality but is still a solid track with more than enough to warrant a listen. The acoustic and bass intro would be awesome...if not for the chime roll...PLEASE STOP.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 3.5/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "Mad"- Ne-Yo



Alan Jackson- "Sissy's Song"

Well...I usually have a real problem with this brand of overly emotional country songs. This one, for some reason seems to have that little extra something missing from all the other imitators...sincerity. See, Alan Jackson isn't writing this song about some random person but a long time employee of his. That's something all these imitators should look at...making universal emotional statements only works if you actually feel something. They played the song at her funeral, how more real can the emotion behind this track get. One can immediately feel an intense personal connection with the sense of loss in this track, although at times, the song does gravitate towards the cliched and overdone. This is authentic country, and a damn good song as well.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 3.5/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "The Dance"- Garth Brooks




Keith Urban- "Kiss A Girl"

You see all that I said about the track above...this is the exact opposite. This is not country, this is pop, HOW MANY TIMES MUST I SAY THAT. The music is cliched pop rehashed chord progressions with limited importance. There is absolutely nothing that stands out in the instrumentation. Lyrically its all cliches with zero appeal to me anymore, I'm sick of hearing every Keith Urban song that is about finding somebody to love. I have had enough of this guy and his fake brand of "country". He is on notice. That is all.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: -1/5...asshole.

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "I Told You So"- Keith Urban




Pitbull- "I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)"

Well...here is something I really didn't need in my life. I'm not going to lie, the beat in this track is sick as hell and its all I can do to contain myself from dancing like a fool right now. Most of the time though, I have no idea what the hell he is saying...and when I do, it's nothing impressive. The hook is "I Know You Want Me / You Know I Want Ya"...creative. The only redeeming quality for this track is the insane instrumentation and the solid use of traditional instruments such as a horn section and guitar. Solid music...horrid lyrics...from what I can understand at least. Well...it all becomes clear...he ripped off another track...still a solid dance choice regardless.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 2/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "75, Brazil Street"- Nicola Fasano vs Pat-Rich (The instrumental base for this track...3.5/5...at least.)





SONG OF THE WEEK!


Fleet Foxes- "Mykonos"

I am a sucker for quality indie pop, especially those which take elements of musical acts of the past and make them seem fresh again. These guys remind me off such bands as The Byrds and CSNY with poetic lyrics and amazing vocal harmonies, just wait until you hear them drop the music for a few bars. I was blown away when I listened to this track due to its connectivity with the folk movement of the past. Apparently it's named after some island in Greece...or some mythical hero, whatever. Not really important, I couldn't tell you what the lyrics mean, but its all about the harmonies and the solid folk instrumentation, especially in the intro. The lead singer reminds me a tad of Canadian hero Neil Young with a shade more ability and less twang. Wow. This is real indie music, give it a chance.

The Arbitrary Rating of Goodness: 4.5/5

What I'd Rather Be Listening To: "Wooden Ships"- Crosby, Stills & Nash





The Jacob Crogie Seal of Awesomeness

Cage The Elephant- "Ain't No Rest For The Wicked"

I just picked up this track recently but it has been out far too long to be considered a new release. That won't stop me from giving it well deserved praise. These guys sound like an awesome mix of Beck and The White Stripes and that is high praise coming from me. Lyrically, this track is just about how horrid life is for some people out there, and is a general lament on life. The slide guitar played throughout this track is amazing and the track should be listened to if for no other reason than that. Great track, never heard of these guys in my life but they deserve some recognition, so they get the SEAL OF AWESOMENESS!




So that's it for another week, be sure to tune in same time next week when we get all the latest and the greatest plus all the crap that everyone else likes...

SHAMELESS PLUG
The SuperHeroes In Training

Until next week, keep your pimphand strong and your rawkfist in the air!