Prelude To A Legacy 5.22.09: John Cena

Posted by Fred Richani on 05.22.2009

You read the headline right. John Cena?! The F-Bomb tells you why the WWE Superstar has a musical legacy worth mentioning.

The CHAMP....IS....HERE!

Okay, well he was here. This week's edition of Prelude to a Legacy is actually not about a full-time rapper. In fact, it's about a professional wrestler who occasionally dabbles in rap. If you are a reader that may be pissed off about this subject matter. You can stop reading. Those who choose to continue reading along, I sincerely thank you.

This week's column is about WWE Superstar John Cena. He doesn't rap anywhere near as much as he used to, but when he did, he out-shined those that preluded him (no pun intended). My inspiration for doing this column on part-time rapper John Cena came from reading a recent article on ESPN.com's PAGE 2, which listed the top five worst musical ventures by athletes. They brought up the 1985 Chicago Bears, Deion Sanders, and even Kobe Bryant's song "K.O.B.E." featuring the equally unmusically-talented, yet much hotter Tyra Banks. As a WWE Superstar and muscular freak of nature, John Cena is technically an athlete.



Unlike the aforementioned athletes, though, John Cena is actually musically-talented. In fact, for those that do not know, the professional wrestler became famous for rapping and doing a damn good job at it. Go Youtube his old freestyles between 2002 and 2005. His freestyles have been funnier and at times, harder, than most battle rappers around that time. Let's take a look:







On Kevin Federline:

The album's called "Playing with Fire, but hold on, I have a better line.
The World's Biggest Scumbag, here he is, Kevin Federline.
The only reason people know you is because your fame and fortune's built-in.
He's got like John Cena street-cred and less talent than Paris Hilton
You want to knock on these people, K-Fed, you must be dreamin.
You see, they hang with a Marine, you're with a dude who likes semen.
Ah you mad, Johnny Nitro, you don't got the nuts to hear me.
And if K-Fed wasn't around, I'd be spearing Britney.

On Kurt Angle:

This is the time that I need to congratulate Kurt Angle.
Shake his hand for a hell of a match, and say thank you.
But that's a bull____ move! Showing you respect is a waste.
If I'm gonna call you out Kurt, I'm gonna spit in your face.
I kicked the hell out of you! And any veteran too.
Ya'll people hate me just because I'm better than you?
Saying "John Cena tapped out. He was crying for his mommy."
You got it wrong. Kurt Angle made me nervous. He was grabbing my salami.
I'm out to snatch back my thunder like a five finger discount.
I'm sick of ya'll riding my balls, time to dismount!

On The Big Show:

But then we got Big Show, saying that I live in a dream land.
I'm chasing his title quicker than he's chasing the ice cream man.
He ran down his whole resume, just to create his own buzz.
That dude's a mark for himself, just like Gastineau was.
Get off your jock, he's all over himself man.
He plays blackjack alone just to beat his own hand.
And the casino manager told him that money was bread.
So he didn't cash in his own chips, that fool ate them instead.
You bet against me at WrestleMania, dude you in the wrong spot.
I keep it X-rated, that's why they call me a long shot.

John Cena is not just a wrestler that took a seemingly one-dimensional gimmick to the stratosphere on the way to super stardom. He is a guy that can not only put on a great match, but would probably be making waves as a pull-no-punches lyricist in hip-hop. Cena even released an album with independent rapper and cousin Tha Trademarc titled You Can't See Me (same as his trademark catchphrase). It may not have made a huge dent on the albums charts, but it did debut #15 on the Billboard 200, despite lack of radio play and promotion, outside of his employer World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE).



So what the hell is John Cena's legacy, when it comes to music you ask? Well, for starters, John Cena will be remembered for being the best athlete turned artist of all-time. His raps put Allen Iverson, Kobe Bryant, and "Prime Time" Deion Sanders to shame. His freestyles are hilarious and You Can't See Me is actually not that bad, featuring Bumpy Knuckles aka Freddie Foxx. John Cena will always be remembered as one of the best wrestling stars of the last ten years and potentially, of all-time, but longtime fans and himself will never forget what helped bring him to the big dance—hip-hop.