The Saturday Morning Car-Tune News Report 09.05.09: They're Only Rolling Stones, But I Like Them

Posted by Lucas Wesley on 09.05.2009

Oasis break up, Beck keeps going, Thom Yorke is a busy man, Grizzly Bear are working with a Doobie, Neil Young has another live album on the way, Phil Spector moves prisons, Massive Attack drop a new single and an unusually high number of Rolling Stones stories, this week on the Saturday Morning Car-Tune News!

Welcome to Week 11. Last week was cool, the first collegiate Saturday Morning Car-Tune News. Nothing of great note this week, but I was questioned about the lack of a mention about DJ AM. There are two primary reasons I neglected to mention him. The simplest reason is that he was found dead at 5:20 PM and because I tend to run off and do things on Fridays, I handed my column to the editors at 5 PM. This week's is being sent even earlier, so if anything else happens today, I apologize for not reporting on it. Anyway, not feeling morbid in my predictions, it wouldn't have made sense to mention him. Secondly and perhaps more importantly, I have nothing to say about him. Of course, any young death is a tragedy, but I don't really even know who he is. So, may he rest in peace, but really, I don't know him. On to news I do have things to say about, it's unofficial Rolling Stones week, featuring two Stones related stories and a Star Power primarily about one of their exploits.

- So, uh, Oasis...what's going on there? Noel quits, Liam quits...is it just Gem and Andy now? 'Cause really, what would that mean? Obviously, this isn't the first time, and it probably isn't the last. But for now, it's...interesting? Personally, I always preferred Noel's singing voice and felt that a full Liam and Gem album (though I see Gem following Noel) could lead to some interesting songwriting. However, I don't know how it will turn out in the long run. Chances are, by 2011, which is when I'd predict the new Oasis album anyway, the brotherly love will return. But if not...well, things could get interesting.


You wouldn't know it, but they're actually quite furious with each other in this photo.

- Beck and Charlotte Gainsbourg update: the album is basically finished, and will be called IRM, the French version of MRI. Though the album will likely be marketed as a solo Gainsbourg album, Beck co-wrote, produced and mixed the album. This mimics the making of Gainsbourg's last album, only with Beck taking a larger role than Air and/or Neil Hannon. He replaced three people and he did more than all of them. Beck rules. In other Beck news, there is also an alternate version of his "Heroin" cover. It's less wonky than the first, pretty straightforward actually. Still cool, though. Finally, he's moved on to the second album in the series: Leonard Cohen's second best album, Songs of Leonard Cohen.

- Brian Jones, founding member of The Rolling Stones, died in 1969. This is not news. The fact that they are reopening the case investigating his long unsolved death is. Some signs point to murder, others point to drug use. For whatever reason, the British police recently decided to look into it so we could have some answers. My prediction: murder! ...by an overdose. Even if they came to some conclusion, as with any good mysterious rock death, half the people who care won't believe it anyway.



- Thom Yorke is a busy man. First, he appears to be releasing a solo single in the very near future. The apparent Double-A side will contain "Feeling Pulled Apart By Horses" and "The Hollow Earth." The release will be hugely limited, with only 8,000 vinyl planned worldwide, released September 21. Later they will be available for digital download. Additionally, Yorke is writing a title song for a film. No, not No Moon - global warming film The Age of Stupid. The film's initial release will be followed by a live broadcast discussion session with Kofi Annan, star Pete Postlethwaite and Gillian Anderson. Some time during the broadcast Yorke will play an acoustic version of an unnamed In Rainbows track. Keeping busy now that Radiohead aren't releasing albums, I suppose.

- I'm all for alternate versions on singles, but this is kinda wacky. Upcoming indie superstars Grizzly Bear are working with...yacht rock master Michael McDonald. The song McDonald will be singing (solo lead, no less) is "While You Wait For The Others." McDonald is also apparently working on the new Holy Ghost! album, officially making him "hip." What a weird world we live in.



- Another odd collaboration: Lady Gaga and Michael Bolton. It makes sense, actually. They both know what it's like to fake having male genitalia, for one. Oh! That's right! I went with an easy joke, but you know you wanted to make it.

- Neil Young has a new album coming out. Well, a live album. Called Dreamin' Man, the album will be a collection of live tracks from Harvest Moon. The full album will be represented, presumably in sequence, but not all songs will be from the same show. Honestly, I don't really care. Make an After The Gold Rush or like a...Live Rust...wait a minute, he did the good ones already! Aw well, if you're interested, check for it in November.

- Well, there goes my hopes for of a Charles Manson/Phil Spector collaboration. Spector has been moved from Corcoran Prison to Pleasant Valley State Prison. It wasn't for his safety, but rather the facilities given to Spector could better be used for prisoners with a greater need for physical care than Spector. All is not lost, though: at Spector's new prison, he will be living with (not in the same room) Erik Menendez of the famous Menendez Brothers. He's never expressed an interest in music before...but there's time!



- Keith Richards has a new friend: Jack White. This has fueled some rumors that White could somehow be involved (producing, guesting, etc) with the next album from The Rolling Stones. However, my first thought was this could mean White is involved in the next Richards solo album. Personally, the latter would make me way happier. Either way, I imagine good things would happen. In other Richards news, he's working with James Fox on an autobiography. Quoth Richards, "I'm trying to remember things, which is very difficult." Sometimes people leave things out of their autobiographies under this disguise in order to protect themselves or others, but something about Keef Riffhard tells me that's the truth.

- One of the new Massive Attack songs can be heard online: "Praying for Rain," featuring TV On The Radio's Tunde Adebimpe. It's pretty sweet, feeling a bit Protection era to my ears. I feel like it's lyrically (or at least the title) inspired by the novel Waiting For The Rain. But what do I know about these things?

Star Power

I'm not pressed for time or anything this week, but I am short on news I can write about at length. So I'm going to talk about my favorite rock story and then talk for a little bit about the concept and execution of the "rock myth." This story becomes relevant this week not only due to the above Keith Richards/Jack White news, but also because there have recently been rumors that Charlie Watts was leaving the band. Well, I haven't actually read any of these rumors, but I did read that they were false. A bit like when Sinbad said he wasn't dead, actually. But it does bring another Charlie Watts story to mind, which I've never seen denied, and I think Keith semi-confirmed.

Before the main story, a brief back story. While it's true that The Rolling Stones were, and by most accounts still are amongst the most decadent of rock bands, Charlie never quite got involved in the fun. He had his vices and he wasn't without his drugs, but he never quite stood for the all night parties and constant shacking up with loose women. He was in fact a happy family man. So much so in fact that he eventually brought his wife and children on tour with him! I'm not sure that the practice continues, but I can say it didn't happen at the time of the story. However, it does remain that he didn't join Mick and Keith when they went to party at levels rivaling Eddie Murphy's girl.


Pictured: Mick Jagger partying all the time, partying all the time, partying all the time with David Bowie.

Cue one night during one of their countless tours. I don't know the tour, the year, or even the time period, but it was one of the Stones many "up" periods. They had success and were on top of the world, as they have been many times. Mick and Keith were at one of their many debauchery filled parties, generally enjoying themselves. Charlie, after a hard day's night of drumming, recording, and doing all kinds of Charlie Watts things, was fast asleep. This didn't sit exceptionally well with Mr. Jagger.

Right now I'm going to warn you of something. In this piece, I use a little bit of profanity. Though conversationally I've never shied from such language, I often try to keep this column as family friendly as possible. Not that I picture families sitting around the computer screen reading it (though that'd be cool), but for whatever reason I feel like in this small public representation of myself, I should show restraint. However, this story is just much better unedited. If this bothers you, scroll down or hit the back button. If not, keep reading.



So, Sir Michael's not happy with Charlie's lack of party instinct. So he calls up his apartment and angrily, drunkenly slurs "Ay, where's my fuckin' drummer?" While I don't recall the rest of the dialogue, point is, this strikes a nerve with Charlie. He hangs up the phone and gets up. He shaves, takes a shower, puts on a suit and tie, and cleans up to look the best he ever has in his life. He calmly goes to Mick's room, I believe a floor or two below his. He knocks on the door a few times and Mick eventually answers, drunkenly and obnoxiously. So Charlie, with one strong right hand to Mick's jaw, knocks him the fuck out. We're talking flipping on to the room service tray, sliding back and falling off here. The party obviously comes to a sudden quiet, and Charlie calmly says "I'm not you're fucking drummer. You're MY fucking singer."

He then straightens himself off, walks back to his room, and goes back to sleep. From that moment forward, Mick has respected Charlie's wishes to stay out of the parties.

So, there's my favorite rock myth. Perhaps it's true, perhaps not, perhaps some of it is and some of it isn't. The latter is probably the most likely option, which I'm sure we all know. That's how rock myths work. I said I'd dissect the idea of the rock myth, but there's not a terrible amount to it. These are semi-true stories that make musicians awesome. There's never a great rock myth about how someone missed a concert over a bad sandwich. That's awful. A stage is a place to write myths about eating bats and killing chickens. Occasionally you may hear a story about a guitarist getting sick one day and not going outside, but only if they wrote a song that day. Constantly, however, you hear stories about guitarists staying at home all day because they're busy makin' with the lovin'. Anything to make someone you like cooler.



Frankly I don't understand this. Music typically speaks for itself. I have no particularly awesome stories to tell about Matt Johnson, but I still think The The is badass. But I suppose it gives gossip columnist something to write about. That's all this week. I'm sorry Star Power was essentially a story that isn't exactly new. But I loves me that story, and I hope I at least told it well.

Farewell Song

1968. No cliché non sequitur since I don't have one. As I'll surely say at least ten more times, the song of the year from 1968 is perhaps my favorite of all time. A purported journey through musical history in less than three minutes, I don't see it as such. To me, it's just a great song with a few great movements. And the singing on this song...well, some believe the singer to be the best of all time. I don't. He's good, he has times when he's great. But one short section of this song is perhaps the greatest singing of all time. Always gives me chills, always leaves me smiling. Bang, bang, shoot, shoot. The song of 1968 is "Happiness Is A Warm Gun" by The Beatles.

The album of 1968 is much different. Though The Beatles gave us a valid release that year, ultimately it's too long and disjointed to win any complete accolades from me. Instead, I go with an album that combined two genres that never really combined again after the band's semi-demise. The genres were tropicalia and psychedelic rock, the band and the album is Os Mutantes.

That's all for this week, madams and sirs. Hope to see you next week for another thrilling edition of the Saturday Morning Car-Tune News!