The Savage Animal 09.16.09: Music Analogies 101
Posted by Mikey MiGo on 09.16.2009
Pop Quiz. “Sock is to Foot as Glove is to…?” In this edition of The Savage Animal, 411’s Mikey MiGo provides his own analogies pertaining to the current world of music. He compares Guitar Hero to Ringtones, Lady GaGa to Master P, Grills to Eyeliner, and more! Click here for that, a review of WWE’s Breaking Point, the new Pearl Jam video, Robin William’s latest movie, Jay Z’s recent concert special, and the answer to the previous question is “Hand”!
I write this column with a lot going on around me. As this column goes live, odds are I'm in smokey bar with my video camera shooting the remaining scenes of my third independent movie, "Upping The Ante". I've talked about how we went with with a "relaxed" shooting schedule this time, but it's been pretty stressful. Not because of the quality of the movie, the movie is shaping up to be very entertaining and will surely be something I'll be proud of. It's stressful because we've grown pretty impatient. We want it done and we want to share it with the world. Soon enough, though. Hell, I'll probably even have a new and first official promotional trailer to debut next week in the column. Hopefully the fun we've had with this project will be shared by the viewers. Hopefully, YOU will be one of those viewers I speak of.
MUSIC ANALOGIES 101
"I put way too much thought into this…"
The two things I remember most about standardized testing is:
1.) "A BALOO IS A BEAR. WUZZLE MEANS TO MIX."
2.) Those random comparative relation questions.
The annoying questions like "CUB : BEAR :: CAT : KITTEN" that wasted a lot of our time. Most of the answers were painfully obvious unless you let the test confuse you and make you over think things. It's something that all of us have had to deal with during our various levels of schooling and I hope it continues for future generations. Not because I think it's a relevant form of testing, but because I feel if we had to do it so should everyone else.
The analogy fun doesn't stop there. It's all around us. In casual conversation, I couldn't begin to count the times I compare one movie to another or one band to another. I use the term "it's like if (blank) and (blank) had a baby" A LOT to describe something. We all have our own variations on it. There's nothing wrong with it. We describe things in analogy form all the time. I take pride in thinking of just the right comparison when describing something. Analogies and metaphors are beautiful parts of the English language. I have a friend who refers to me as "The Metaphor Master" because of my love for the wording.
I thought about it and realized that a good analogy is just as impactful as a witty metaphor. I decided to "go old school" and bust out some music related analogies that have been in my head for a little while.
Guitar Hero is to Rock Music AS Ringtones are to Rap Music
The 411: I know Guitar Hero and Rock Band are "good because they expose people to music"… but the same can be said for ringtones. I am not a gamer, but being a music lover I do see the appeal of these games. I'm not a cell phone type of person, but again as a music lover I enjoy the occasional ringtone out of the blue. A friend of mine has it set up to where "Twilight Zone" by Golden Earring plays whenever I call him. That's just flat out great. It's easy to hate on ringtone rappers, but just about any and every song could be a ringtone now. It's not exclusive to just the shitty ones like Lil Wayne. The same can be said for the Guitar games. It's not JUST exclusive to "the best bands EVER"… they ARE shitty bands on those games too. Both acts can be considered selling out and both can be considered "presenting your music on a new platform". There's not much difference. At the end of the day, "real rappers" who shit on "ringtone rappers" will still cash their ring tone checks. The pompous musicians who went out of their way to preserve their legacy will still cash their video game checks. It's capitalizing on new technology to promote one's work and to make more profit. It's the same thing.
Hair Metal is the 90's AS Nu-Metal is the 00's
The 411: By the time the early 90's was behind us, "hair metal" was considered a passed fad and a punch-line to many music lovers. Many would blame the uprise of grunge music, but I just think "hair metal" simply passed its expiration date. Subgenre's just don't last that long. Same can be said for "Nu-Metal". By the time the early 00's were behind us, "nu-metal" too was an afterthought to the general masses. Many would blame the "The Bands" like "The White Stripes", "The Strokes", etc. Both genres had their upswings here and there due to their diehard fan base, but the common acceptance of the musical stylings were "so yesterday". While bands like "Motley Crue" and "Poison" can still do pretty well on the road and chart respectfully, the same can be said for nu-metal acts like "Korn" or "Disturbed". Music evolves and sometimes genre bands will as well, but when it comes down to it their bread is always buttered by their initial and "outdated" style.
Chris Brown is to Rihanna AS Ike Turner was to Tina Turner
The 411: This isn't a joke as so much of wishful thinking. What Ike did to Tina and what Chris did to Rihanna was work of pussies. Hitting a woman is weak sauce and never something I'd condone. To look at it from the ONLY positive way I can, Rihanna is a bigger name because of the incident. She was already popular, but once you're a topic of discussion on Oprah then you're officially "REALLY famous". I make the analogy because after Tina got away from Ike she pretty much had the best part of her career. I'm hoping Rihanna can and will do the same. I'm not even a fan of Rihanna's music or ever her looks, but I'd love to see her future success overshadow the domestic abuse news item. In time, I hope "Rihanna the victim" isn't how this lovely young woman is remembered. Follow Miss Turner's path, dear, PLEASE.
Lady GaGa is to Pop Music AS Master P was to Rap Music
The 411: Master P was the ultimate parody of what and who a rapper is/was. Lady CaCa(yeah, typo intended) is in the same boat. Image wise, Master P was over the top with his "gangsta" image. Meanwhile, CaCa holds nothing back in her pathetic attempts to gain attention for being "eccentric". There's a fine line between gaudy and eccentric and CaCa has passed it a few hundred miles ago. Her music is disposable, but because of her being in the pop genre she gets the "it's only pop music, what do you expect?" card used A LOT. Pop music CAN have talented musicians involved as Timberlake, Usher, and the late Michael Jackson have proven. There's no excuse for shitty music. P grew out of it and made success happen for himself elsewhere. I wish the same for CaCa, but that doesn't mean I can't hate what she stands for for the time being. Remember folks, just because it gets stuck in your head doesn't mean it's good. P's and CaCa's music goes just that. It's catchy… but so is herpes.
Platinum Grills are to Hip Hop AS Eyeliner is to Rock Music
The 411: I make this comparison because both are ridiculous to wear unless you're in a band or a performer. If you see a random person wearing a grill at the mall then odds are pretty damn good that they're a fan of hip hop. Same for the eyeliner. If you see someone, specifically a male, wearing it then they're most definitely a fan of rock music. It's campy either way and only works for certain people. Flavor Flav without a grill just isn't Flavor Flav. Marilyn Manson without eyeliner is just ugly.
First Grade is to Second Grade AS Disney is to MTV
The 411: The old redundancy was saying "MTV doesn't show music videos anymore". For years, music elitist and wannabes would spout off how bad MTV was. This is obvious now, but how obvious they've declined is kind of depressing. I recall a day in age where Music Television had some sort of edge to it. There is NO edge to MTV at all anymore. The proof is in the pudding folks. What used to be for young adults is now for older children. The Miley's, Jonas's, and all the hip hop cross overs have blurred the line of the two separate brands. Even as of a few years ago, MTV and Disney were like comparing apples and oranges. The only thing separating the VMAs from the Kids' Choice Awards is a few, only a few, gallons of slime. Now it's like comparing oranges and tangerines. One is a little rougher to eat, but all in all… they taste pretty much the same.
What are some current musical analogies that YOU find correct?
RANDOM VIDEO OF THE WEEK
Everyone else is doing it…
"The Fixer" by Pearl Jam
The 411:Pearl Jam is known for their live shows, so this video is a good choice. I am big fan of the visual style in this one. It's chaotic as a live performance should be and the band just rocks out. They seem "in the moment" as many live videos don't seem to properly capture. The screens behind the band of simultaneous action is a cool idea and surprisingly hasn't been done in this way before. It's obvious that it's all green screened, but it's a pretty awesome update to the layered look of old Black Sabbath videos. I've always been a semi-casual fan of Pearl Jam. I like them about 25% of the time and the rest is always "take it or leave it". I'm happy to say that "The Fixer" is one of those songs that fit into the possibly growing 25%. This is one of my favorite videos of the year. With only a few months of the year left, it'll probably stay that way.
RANDOM MOVIE REVIEW IN 411 WORDS OR LESS
"WORLD'S GREATEST DAD"
STARRING ROBIN WILLIAMS, DARYL SABARA, ALEXIE GILMORE
The 411: The trailer is funny and all, but doesn't do the movie justice. I was fortunate enough to see this movie recently and I was shocked. I'm not a huge Robin Williams fan. I want to laugh with or even at Robin Williams because he does seem like a fun guy, his material doesn't hit my personal funny bone at all. I do, however, love his drama work of recent years. So when I first heard of the movie, I was hopeful but very reluctant to watch it. I might not have even given it a chance if it weren't for the fact that I was very interested in seeing what kind of dark and twisted shit Bobcat Goldthwait was going to deliver. Since they don't give it away in the trailer, I won't give it away in my review. The movie revolves around an aspiring writer who teaches an insignificant high school poetry class and has a very dickish and perverted son. The dad, played perfectly by Williams, has to deal with his son being a dick, his secret girlfriend from work who he pathetically yearns for, and just the fact that his life in a complete rut. The whole world is out to shit on Robin William's character and he just basically stands there open armed and takes it. This all sounds pretty depressing and it is, but it's also one of the funniest movies I've seen in a long time. I am a big fan of dark comedies and this one delivers tenfold. I will say that there seems to be a few conveniently similar plot points "borrowed" from the 80's classic "Heathers". That doesn't take away from the fact that "Worlds Greatest Dad" is sleeper of the year. If you like your comedy presented in a dark, twisted, and thought out way THIS is what you want to see. It's not a movie that will make you giggle every minute, but laugh LOUDLY every five minutes… when it's not making you feel uncomfortable. Things will probably change in the future when it comes to my assessment of this movie. I am one of those "The Hangover is an instant classic!" assholes out there so I can't say it's my favorite comedy of the year. Favorite DARK comedy of the year? Fuck yes. (Sorry, "Observe and Report")
RANDOM STUFF ON MY TV IN 411 WORDS OR LESS
"JAY-Z LIVE FROM MSG"
I watched some of that Jay Z concert special on FUSE this past weekend and came to terms that Jay Z has officially won the battle against Nas. I find them both very talented at times, but have always been more of a Nas fan. It's cool they ended their battle and seem like good buddies now, but Nas is obviously being presented as the inferior of the two. Case in point, I can think of at least two times that Nas has made a "guest appearance" on a Hova show. How many times has Jay-Z made an appearance for a Nas concert? Jay-Z wins. The show was good and there were lots of cool appearances (i.e. John Mayer) that made it seem special. I really liked the "Fade To Black" DVD from a few years back, but this show seemed SO much better. I wish I could say the same about "The Blue Print 3".
WRESTLING WITH PILLOWS
Looking Out From the Inside.
Of course I have to throw in my two cents about the Jeff Hardy bust. I'm not against someone for making the decision for recreational drug use. I personally believe that alcohol is WAY worse than marijuana. The stuff Hardy had was a bit more serious than the typical recreational drug. I don't know the facts so I won't pass judgment on the actual situation. If Jeff gets the potential heavy distribution charge then he WILL spend time in prison. I'd assume he's wealthy, but I don't know if he's rich enough to get out of this. If that's the case, Jeff will be passed around like a bag of Oreos. If I were him, I'd hire New Jack to get arrested and go in there as my bodyguard.
I watched what I could of Breaking Point on Sunday. Between the PPV, the Bears game, and the VMAs my remote hand is strong. The opening match of Jericho/Big Show going over on MVP/Mark Henry was solid, but not as good as a match as I thought it could have been. I'd even go as far as saying the Jericho/MVP match and the recent Tag match on RAW were better than this. I hope this feud isn't over because it surely didn't end on the high point it should of. Miz and Kofi rocked. I am HUGE fan of Kofi Kingston and have enjoyed Miz's evolution over the past couple years. I really wanted to see Morrison on the PPV, but this match made up for it. The Miz looked strong in the match and the crowd reaction to Kofi's comeback proves he's a future main eventer.
At this point, I thought that it would be BAD ASS if The Hart Dynasty attacked DX. The Legacy is getting stale and something needs to be done with it before it fades away. The Hart Dynasty vs. DX would be good stuff and a great way to utilize DX being together. I know Tyson Kidd isn't a second generation superstar, but I'm totally cool with them going with the fact that he's Dynamite Kid's son. He can claim "We both have the same last name!" and all will be well. I'm only half joking.
I am a fan of old DX, but now… not so much. That doesn't mean I dislike Triple H or Michaels at all. Michaels is my favorite of all time and I still think he's the best on the roster. Triple H is a living legend and has EARNED his position in the company by being consistent. He's NOT the devil the IWC claims him to be. Sadly, when DX is together it's not as fun as it was when I was in High School. Their tag matches always leave little to be desired and my expectations going into this match weren't very high. Because of this, I think I enjoyed this match way more than the casual smark. The stipulation od "Submissions Count Anywhere" was tremendous and I am hoping to see it return soon. Besides it being a fun back and forth match, they pulled out some spots and moves that I literally shouted out loud over. Specifically, the double submission chair spot was AWESOME. Then the Million Dollar Dream/Figure Four on the post finish… Rocktastic! I'm thrilled to see The Legacy go over, get the rub, and hopefully cement themselves as a legitimate act.
The smart thing to do was to follow this great match with the obviously going to suck match that was Kane and Kahli. The match sucked and I ended up watching part of the Bears game instead. Woo Hoo. The next match was Christian and Regal. A match that I really had no interest in seeing. Both wrestlers are fine workers and are very capable of putting on great matches, but for some reason the combination of the two has no appeal to me. The match ended up being pretty good, but it could have been a really good main event on Superstars just the same. Regal was obviously wearing his working boots and pulled some moves I've not seen since his name was Lord Steven. Sadly, he didn't win. Christian's music sucks so badly that I don't like seeing him win because of having to hear it for a second time. I totally missed the Orton/Cena match. I had a small task to take care of and felt it was the best time to do so. Cena ruins anything he's a part for me. It's not a "boo! Bad guy!" or "boo! He sucks"… it's just he's so NOTHING to me(worst reaction a performer could get) that I void out all of his involvement. Sadly, tonight's innocent bystander was Orton. I see that Orton lost. That sucks. It just means RAW will end fifteen to twenty minutes earlier for me than it does you. I came back to the PPV in time to catch the last of the Punk/Taker match. The fact that Taker won was bothersome…but wait, no! Long then comes out and pulls the "Vickie's rules still stand" nonsense. Then THE SCREW JOB! I am not a Punk fan, but that was entertaining.
Overall, the PPV ended up surprising me. Not just because I forgot about it until Sunday afternoon, but because it had some quality matches and decent developments. No wonder Michaels lost tonight... if he'd of won AND they pulled a screw job in the same night... Canada and the US would be at war by dawn.
That's all for this week. I almost didn't get a column out due to my schedule this week and I'm still only 90% I'll get one out next week. I am leaning towards yes as next week will be another "First Impression" column. A short break from the madness to take in a couple hours of new music just might be the trick in order to keep my sanity. Until next time… Have a Great Week!
