Quick ‘n’ Dirty Music News: 10.09.09

Posted by Mitch Michaels on 10.09.2009

Katy Perry & Russell Brand, GN’R getting sued, everyone is suing Michael Jackson, Britney Spears’ ex is talkin’ bout the back rent, Method Man vs. the I.R.S., Kanye West promotes racism, Mariah vs. Nicole in the Battle of the Babes and more! Plus, Top 10 KISS Songs, chart news and Mayra Veronica has your attention as the sexy Piece of the Week!

Hey kids! Mitch Michaels back with you for the Friday Flagship, the Bastion of Boobies, the Standard for Swearing, the Quick ‘n' Dirty Music News. I am jazzed as FUCK this week thinking about all the great new upcoming releases, especially the Tom Petty and Nirvana live albums. Kind of odd they're putting out the Bleach 20th anniversary version the same day as Live At Reading though – it's like counterprogramming for fans of the same band.

Anyway, as usual, plugs:

Couple of contests this week. For all you aspiring DJs, we're giving away a USB Audio 2 DJ from Native Instruments. If you're into gadgetry or rock the beats, check out the contest here. Ended yesterday, but I ain't picked a winner yet, so give it a shot.

Also, we're giving away a copy of the new two disc ZZ Top DVD. It's pretty cool – you get a live performance from 1980 (kind of before the guys found the image you see today) and then one from a couple years ago. Sounds like a badass way to spend a Friday night, right? You can enter right here.

Also finally, make sure to follow us on Twitter (Mitch, 411mania, 411 Music) or Facebook (Mitch, 411mania). How else will you know what movie I'm catching on Friday night? Fuckin' Bill Murray – HILARIOUS!

OK, enough of that. Let's get to it. It's quick, it's dirty, it's news.

Let's go…



STAND BY…FOR NEWS!

All news items are from 411 Music's newswire:

Looks like Axl Rose has been caught stealing. (Yes, I know that's a Jane's Addiction song, but can you name a good GN'R stealing lyric?) Guns N' Roses is being sued by German musician Ulrich Schnauss, who claims they sampled two of his tracks on the song "Riad N' The Beduoins" off of Chinese Democracy. When I first read this story, I thought it has to be baseless, because GN'R doesn't have a song with that stupid of a title. Then I checked ChiDem and, sure enough, there it was.

Now, "RN'B" (which, by the way, sounds nothing like an R&B song) does start out with some weird noises, which I'll assume are the basis of the lawsuit. GN'R's management has issued a statement denying any wrongdoing. The band says there were tracks used for "ambient noise" on "RN'B", but that they were under the impression that the track's engineer had legal permission to use them.

So, in other words – yeah, they sampled and didn't credit, but they thought it was OK. I'm sure the studio will wind up eating this one.

The biggest news here though is that someone is actually listening to Chinese Democracy eleven months after it came out.

Now, I'm not a Chinese Democracy hater, by any means. I thought the album was one of the most solid releases of 2008. Did it live up to the hype? What the fuck could? But was it a Phantom Menace-level flop? Not at all. ChiDem sounds like the natural progression from the Use Your Illusion albums – just about a decade too late. Yeah, it was good, but I wouldn't consider it memorable from a music standpoint.

However, you can't post GN'R news on 411 without people coming out of the woodwork to say that they suck. The sad thing is that, most of the haters are actually former fans who, over the years, have tired of the long wait and Axl's schtick to the point that they couldn't bring themselves to be excited when the record finally came to fruition.

And that's the problem – the most critical person is not someone who never loved a band, but someone who loved them and was scorned.

Well, that and people who hate the Insane Clown Posse. What the fuck? Who are they hurting?



Well, if you being an awful host for the MTV VMAs for two straight years isn't enough, it looks like you have even more reason to hate Russell Brand now – the dude has apparently started dating Katy Perry after the two met in in New York last month.

Katy has been linked to a few other stars (including that motherfucker Josh Groban), but this one seems more serious. Not only have they been seeing each other for over a month, Brand was quoted as saying that he things he's "in love".

I guess Katy is into weird looking guys, given that she just broke off a longterm relationship with Gym Class Heroes frontman Travis McCoy earlier in the year.


I got nothing else to say on this one – it's a celebrity hook-up, will be over before Christmas. Just an excuse to post a hot Katy Perry pic.



You can always count on Michael Jackson news these days. What was going on this week?

As the battle for control of Michael's estate ramps up, the lawsuits have started flying. Late last week, the estate sued the "Heal The World Foundation" for using Jackson's likeness without permission. The estate claims that the Foundation is in no way related to the organization of the same name that Michael started in the early 90's. The Foundation responded to the suit this week, saying there was no reason to protect Michael Jackson's likeness from them because they were friends and "you don't 'protect' yourself from a friend", which has to be the most pathetic response to a lawsuit I've ever heard.

Can someone please give the Heal The World Foundation a hug and find a better celebrity to hook them up with? What's Paul McCartney up to?

In other lawsuit news, a court has ruled against Dr. Arnie Klein, who would like us all to believe it was his sperm that created Michael's children. Klein is raising a stink about what's going on with the children now that Michael is dead, but a court ruled this week that he had no legal standing to complain. The court ruled that Michael and ex-wife Debbie Rowe are the legal parents by "conclusive presumption" of Prince Michael and Paris Jackson and that little Blanket has no legal mother.

Meanwhile, concerns by Antonio Banderas that little Blanket's not being washed properly underneath his mask are being considered due to overwhelming physical evidence.


Hey, remember that Michael Jackson auction that was called off earlier this year? Well, it seems that a guy who was the high bidder on 170 items has filed claim against MJ's estate for $5,000,000 in "emotional damages" because he did not get his stuff. The five mil is the approximate value for the items he bidded on and didn't win.

The guy is saying his bids were accepted by the auction house and therefore valid. The auction house says that their ass was covered and terms said it could be canceled at any time.

Sorry fella – looks like you're going to have to get your white gloves and gently used youth-size underwear elsewhere.

And if that weren't enough, a lawyer is claiming that Jackson owes him over $100,000 after he spent several hundred hours straightening out some of Michael's tax problems five years ago. By the way, you know you're filthy fucking rich when you're getting charged six figures just to FIX some tax problems. Just goes to prove what I always say: Rich motherfuckers don't use H&R Block.

What? I do always say that.

Elsewhere, the LAPD says they're wrapping up the manslaughter investigation into Michael Jackson's death and that Dr. Conrad Murray remains the key figure. It came out earlier this week that Murray had propofol – the drug that killed Michael – sent via FedEx from a pharmacy in Vegas to his girlfriend in Santa Monica, California on a regular basis.

It looks like Murray is about to change his profession from cardiologist to prison tattoo artist and part time rape victim. That is, unless the inmates just kill him – everyone loved Michael Jackson after all.


One good thing for Murray is, when he does get to prison, he can finally quit worrying about paying his child support. A warrant was issued for his arrest this week after he failed to show up in court for a hearing about $13,000 in unpaid checks to his kid.


As for Michael himself –still dead. Word came out this week that security at his tomb in Glendale, California has been scaled back. Good news for the auction guy from a few paragraphs ago – looks like you'll be able to pick up that fake nose on eBay soon!

Finally, on a UK TV show this week, LaToya Jackson reiterated her claim that Michael, with his passion and love for peace, was like God.

Yep, just like a kid-touching god.

And that's all the big news this week. Some quick hits:

Kevin Federlin, ex-husband of Britney Spears, pissed off his former landlords by abandoning his rented place in L.A. and skipping out on over $100,000 in rent. Not only that, but they say he left the place uninhabitable with beer bottles all over the yard and in the gutter, broken appliances and drawings on the walls. The funny thing is that, if it were in a college town, you'd have to room with five other guys to afford a place that good.

No word on where K-Fed ran off to, but there's currently 24-hour security on this place:


There goes the neighborhood.

Weezer frontman Rivers Cuomo has revealed that the idea for the band to do a track with Lil Wayne came from Weezy's track "Kush", where he mentioned the Ninja Turtles. Vanilla Ice is already in talks to appear on the next Weezer album, tentatively titled Coolpreciation.


Aerosmith will be getting back together for the first time since theyc anceled their tour to play a private party for Oracle. Looks like they're Back In The SQL again!

I'll give you a moment for the douche chills to subside.

Kanye West continued to keep racism alive this week in an interview with TMZ as he was leaving a Cheesecake Factory. When the show asked what he had ate, he said chicken, because "I'm black." When the interviewer asked if Kanye had actually had the chicken Madeira or the crusted chicken romano, Kanye pondered this for a moment before realizing that perhaps "watermelon cheesecake" would have been a funnier response.


Chris Brown is going on a club tour soon in order to have an intimate atmosphere with his fans – certainly because he wouldn't be able to fill a larger venue.

And finally, Method Man is facing four years in prison after being arrested for owing over $32,000 in back taxes. Now see, THAT motherfucker should have went to H&R Block.

This edition of the Quick ‘n' Dirty Music News was brought to you by H&R Block. You've got people.

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It's a big one this week – emphasis on big ones – as Mariah Carey was looking hot as ever at the premiere of the new movie Precious. In the opposing corner, former Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger is smoking up stages trying to get her solo career off the ground. But who was hotter?




This is actually one of the tougher Battle of the Babes. Both are really working their best assets (Mariah's boobs vs. Nicole's all around sluttiness). Nicole's fishnets almost have me here, but in the end – WANT TO TOUCH – Mariah wins.

What do you think?

KISS Songs
KISS have been all over your TV this week, performing tracks from their Walmart exclusive new album Sonic Boom. I've never been a giant KISS fan (and nothing I've heard from the new record makes me want to buy it), but you gotta admit that the Demon, the Star Child, the Spaceman and the Catman have made some pretty stellar rock hits. So here is...

Mitch's Top 10 KISS Songs
1	Love Gun
2	Christine Sixteen
3	Strutter
4	Hard Luck Woman
5	Plaster Caster
6	Calling Dr. Love
7	Deuce
8	Detroit Rock City
9	Rock and Roll All Nite
10	Shout It Out Loud

QUICK ‘n' DIRTY CHART NEWS

NEW RELEASES FOR OCTOBER 13, 2009

WHAT EVERYONE WILL BUY

Bob Dylan - Christmas In The Heart - This is a really tough call this week. On the one hand, it's a new Bob Dylan album and there's not much else super mainstream hitting the stores. On the other hands it's a Christmas album and it's October. The Flaming Lips are releasing their new album, but that's not a surefire interest getter. Dylan's Christmas set, however, has the serious music world abuzz. I guess we'll just have to watch the chips fall, but right now my guess is there's enough pre-album talk to have people into Christmas, even this soon before Halloween.

WHAT WILL BE NUMBER ONE

Well, what the fuck. They said this week was a toss up between Mariah Carey and Paramore, but Barbra Stresiand wound up sitting on top of the charts. I guess gay guys and elderly jewish women are still flocking to the record stores on the week of release. Babs moves 180,000 copies of her new album – that's 5k more than Paramore, who landed at #2 and 12k more than Mariah, who raced up behind at #3. Good week for record sales, though, as the entire Top 5 sold over 100,000 copies. Breaking Benjamin and Alice In Chains were both in there too. Madonna's Celebration pulled in at #7 with just 72k, which has me scratching my head – this thing was promoted, has a new single, wtf? I didn't think to call Miranda Lambert or Selena Gomez & The Scene, but they also debuted in the Top 10 – yes, that's right – 8 of the 10 albums in the Top 10 this week were debuts. Only Pearl Jam and Jay-Z held on from last week.

This week is being called a dead heat between KISS and Michael Buble. KISS has Walmart, Buble has Oprah fans. I don't know which is bigger. Toby Keith will definitely be settling for third in there, and look for the Backstreet Boys to swine flu their way into the Top 10 as well. Interesting note – if KISS pulls in at #1, it'll be the first time ever. Only four KISS studio albums have went Top 10 - Love Gun, Dynasty, Revenge and Psycho Circus (their highest, it debuted at #3 in 1998). The first three Alive albums were also Top 10, but none reached the top.

WHAT YOU SHOULD BUY

Bob Dylan – Christmas In The Heart: I love unique sounding Christmas albums, and nothing could be more unique than Dylan rasping out "Silver Bells". Stuff my stocking with this and that new Tom Jones Christmas album and I'm a happy camper.

Five For Fighting - Slice: Is it too early to get nostalgic about one hit wonders from the 2000's? Remember "Superman"? I wouldn't mind giving this a listen – I'm a sucker for piano based alterna-rock.

Los Lonely Boys - 1969: How far is heaven? About forty years back, I guess. This EP is the Boys' tribute to the year rock exploded. It features a Beatles cover and the natural Santana take ("I see you bitches is enjoying my sparkling wine"), but I'm most interested in hearing their version of The Doors' "Roadhouse Blues".

WHAT'S HOT ON THE DIAL?

Billboard has about a million charts, so each week I'm gonna round up the #1s from each format. That way, no matter WHAT station you flip to when not using your presets, you'll be aware of what you might hear. Newly crowned #1s are in bold:

BILLBOARD #1 SINGLES
CHART	SINGLE	WEEKS
POP/OVERALL
HOT 100	Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne – "Down"	14
RADIO SONGS	Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne – "Down"	11
POP SONGS	Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne – "Down"	11
HEATSEEKERS SONGS	LMFAO - "La La La"	13
DIGITAL
DIGITAL SONGS	Miley Cyrus - "Party In The U.S.A."	8
RINGTONES	Jay-Z, Rihanna & Kanye West - "Run This Town"	7
R&B/HIP-HOP
R&B/HIP-HOP SONGS	Maxwell – "Pretty Wings"	23
RAP SONGS	Jay-Z, Rihanna & Kanye West - "Run This Town"	11
COUNTRY
HOT COUNTRY SONGS	Toby Keith - "American Ride"	14
ROCK
ROCK SONGS	Alice In Chains – "Check My Brain"	8
ALTERNATIVE SONGS	Muse – "Uprising"	9
ADULT CONTEMPORARY
ADULT CONTEMPORARY	Miley Cyrus – "The Climb"	30
CHRISTIAN
CHRISTIAN SONGS	Phillips, Craig & Dean – "Revelation Song"	23
GOSPEL SONGS	BeBe & CeCe Winans – "Close To You"	21
DANCE
DANCE/CLUB PLAY SONGS	Ralphi Rosario feat. Shawn Christopher - "Everybody Shake It"	9
JAZZ
JAZZ SONGS	Jessy J – "Tropical Rain"	13
LATIN
LATIN SONGS	Shakira – "Loba"	14
REGIONAL MEXICAN SONGS	Joan Sebastian - "Te Ira Mejor Sin Mi"	12
LATIN POP SONGS	Shakira – "Loba"	14
TROPICAL SONGS	Aventura – "Su Veneno"	8
INTERNATIONAL
EUROPEAN HOT 100	David Guetta feat. Akon - "Sexy Chick"	10
JAPAN HOT 100	Jejung & Yuchun from Tohoshinki - "Colors Melody and Harmony"	N/A
UNITED KINGDOM SONGS	Taio Cruz - "Break Your Heart"	N/A
GERMANY SONGS	David Guetta feat. Akon - "Sexy Chick"	N/A
FRANCE SONGS	Tom Frager & Gwayav - "Lady Melody"	N/A
CANADIAN HOT 100	The Black Eyed Peas – "I Gotta Feeling"	17
WEB
iLIKE LIBRARIES	The Black Eyed Peas – "I Gotta Feeling"	17
iLIKE PROFILES	The Black Eyed Peas – "I Gotta Feeling"	11
LALA.COM	Jay Sean feat. Lil Wayne – "Down"	9
AOL RADIO	Taylor Swift – "You Belong With Me"	17
YAHOO AUDIO	Taylor Swift – "You Belong With Me"	12

	Mitch's Picks

A lot of hot chick pics popping up in the 411 music news this week, possibly cause the real music news was a little light. It's easy to get desensitized with so much quality T&A flying around every day, but there are still times when a hottie can stop you in your tracks. This week that happened with Mayra Veronica, a Latin model who is now working on a pop career. Whatever she's selling, I'm buying – Mayra is your Piece of the Week!

THE END

That's all for this week. Make sure to comment on what you liked, didn't like, etc. Till next week, keep your ears to the ground.

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