Quick ‘n’ Dirty Music News: 09.03.10
Posted by Mitch Michaels on 09.03.2010
T.I. is in trouble, Samantha Ronson’s dog days, Guns N’ Roses are back, Diddy may be age-ist, Soulja Boy’s book and more! Plus, Katy vs. Jewel in Battle of the Babes, chart news and Miranda Lambert, Taylor Swift and the other CMA Nominees are our Pieces of the Week!
"I think I'm big MITCH
Larry Hoover
Gettin' work
Hallelujah
One nation, under God
Real niggaz gettin' money from the fuckin' start"
LABOR DAY MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!
If you're reading this, your three days from making it to the end of summer. Congrats. Now it's football and Halloween, then the big family holidays that everybody loves and then we call 2010 a year. And somewhere in there I turn 31. Fuck me.
Had a great vacation last week, thanks for asking. If you live near the Outer Banks and haven't been - go there. That I've been around 4 hours from there for the last nine years and have never went until now kind of sickens me after seeing how fucking awesome it is. And I learned a valuable lesson there too - iPods and washing machines don't mix. So if anybody wants to replace my very clean, very dead iPod for Christmas, here's a link: Mitch's Make-A-Wish. Remember - God helps those who help Mitch.
Anyway, welcome to the Quick ‘n' Dirty News and I'm Mitch Michaels. I was slummin' it this evening at the Dollar Tree and I ran across a Barenaked Ladies DVD of all things. It was Barelaked Nadies from 2002 - a compilation of videos and some really great live performances, too. It still makes me sad knowing that Steve Page is no longer part of the group, and I forgot how much love BNL before I popped this in. So this week's QnD is brought to you buy this $1 DVD - it's highly recommended if you're in the Dollar Tree for whatever reason - even with sales tax included. And Barelaked Nadies will be our soundtrack for today's column
So let's get it started with some BIG LINKS! Larry Hoover! Gettin' work, hallelujah!
Go read Music Fact or Fiction this week, featuring Alistair McGeorge and Todd Vote. But don't go if you're a fan of The Beatles or Guns N' Roses - you'll just get mad.
David Hayter and Aaron Titan literally agreed on NOTHING in this week's 411 Music Buy or Sell. Which is good for me, cause it means I got to be the final word on every song.
And a big thanks to Ben C. for filling in for me last week in ForF and BorS. Go read his Three Days Grace review from last year, as it's the first thing to come up when you Google him. FYI, the first column to come up when you Google me is a QnD from February where I talk about Ellen's American Idol debut, John Mayer's racist dick and a bunch of hot black chicks were our Piece of the Week.
And, as always, make sure to follow us on Twitter (Mitch, 411mania, 411 Music) or Facebook (Mitch, 411mania). If you do, you know about my iPod already.
Now, without further adieu, let's get to it. It's quick, it's dirty, it's news.
So the big news this week (until T.I. got arrested, which we'll get to in a minute) had only the slightest of musical relevance. Samantha Ronson, a DJ best known as Lindsay Lohan's on-again/off-again ugly lesbian lover, is in a little bit of a pickle.
Samantha laid down over the weekend to get some sleep at her West Hollywood apartment. Her friends were hanging around and, as tends to happen when your dumbass friends are hanging around, her dog got out. Sam's dog is a bulldog named Cadillac. Cadillac hasn't made a lot of friends at Sam's apartment, as he allegedly bit a person there AND another dog. In fact, Cadillac just got back home last week after attending a training camp to help him socialize better. How much did it suck for Samantha that Cadillac and Lindsay were both in rehab at the same time?
Unfortunately, it seems that Lindsay's time in rehab may have had more of an impact. When finally left to roam the halls of Sam's apartment on his own, Cadillac went searching for a snack. And he found one - a 2-year old Maltese named Tiger.
I realize that not everyone knows about dog breeds, so let me put it this way - if life were the WWE, Bulldog vs. Maltese would be a squash match.
So, long story short, Tiger's dead, Cadillac is on the lam and Samantha Ronson is facing criminal charges. All because somebody let her dog out while she was taking a nap.
I have to admit - this story has made me sadder than Michael Jackson's death. I feel sorry for everyone involved, even partly for Samantha. I mean - if Cadillac had a history of biting people, something should have been done. But it sounds like she WAS trying, given Cadillac's recent training seminar.
I don't know what happened to Cadillac in his life that made him a biting dog. Probably Samantha didn't train him properly as a puppy and then he became a problem when it was too late. At that point, you're so used to your dogs quirks that you just kind of avoid the things that cause problems. But someone let the dog out. Who? Who? Who?
I feel sorry for Tiger and his owner, for sure. But I feel sorry for Cadillac, too. Animal control will no doubt judge he should be put down. Sam was smart to ship him out of state. Something tells me he's gonna have to disappear for quite a while before this all blows over.
Samantha will most likely have to pay a fine, which isn't near as bad as seeing Tiger's owners every day at the mailboxes.
T.I. and his new wife Tiny Cottle were arrested earlier this week for felony drug possession. The couple was driving down Sunset in L.A. in T.I.'s Maybach when they were pulled over for making an illegal U-turn. Cops claim the smelled marijuana and searched the vehicle. What turned up? Ecstasy!
The couple was booked and released on $10,000 bail after a few hours.
A music star getting busted for drugs is about as rare as the sun rising in the east, but the problem here is that T.I. is fresh out of jail and still on probation. Not to mention he's got a new album to promote.
Right now, there's very little known about the situation. The biggest thing revealed, in my opinion, is T.I.'s wife is kinda ugly:
I guess HE can't have whatever he likes.
50 Cent, of all people, gave the couple some advice - he told Tiny to say the X was hers. I have to say, that's the first thing I thought of, too. Then again, who knows what her priors are. She looks like she did some living before T.I. locked her down, too.
This is just REALLY fucking dumb on T.I.'s part. The guy was just locked up and managed to somehow have his public image survive carrying illegal guns. Now it's drugs. T.I. - you're rich. Shouldn't you be paying some motherfucker to carry your drugs FOR you?
Tip is now back in Atlanta at the behest of his probation officer. The probation board is waiting until more facts come out before making a decision - which could very well involve sending him back to jail.
So what else is going on this week?
The 2011 Cheryl Cole calendar is out. If it's a 16-month, I'll be picking it up when I get paid tomorrow. Here's the best shot.
It's nice to know that, even in this digital age, people are still buying spank material in print.
Bon Jovi is considering doing a Vegas run. Not many details are known, but there's been an offer from one of the hotels there for the Jersey boys to set up shop for their own Vegas show. I could say rock is dead, but Bon Jovi hasn't been rock for a long time. I could say Bon Jovi is dead but, honestly, what kind of integrity can we expect after "Who Said You Can't Go Home"? I guess I'll just say best of luck boys!
It looks like Jennifer Lopez WILL be joining Steven Tyler as host on American Idol. Color me unimpressed. It's not even going to be fun watching the show die this year knowing Ryan Seacrest will still have his radio show, thus NOT rendering him homeless and giving blowjobs for face time on public access television channels.
Snoop Dogg is making Doggystyle 2. Seventeen years and it's just our second Doggystyle? Snoop - you've been married way too fucking long.
I never thought I'd say this, but I kinda wanna fuck Kelly Osbourne.
Guns N' Roses caused a major scene at the Reading and Leeds festivals over the weekend, showing up late and then verbally berating the promoters until the house mics were turned off on them. Later this week, they left the stage in Dublin after just four songs because people were throwing bottles. Who says it's not really GN'R without Slash?!
Glee is back soon. Yuck. In a related note - were the Emmys just unbearably gay this year or was it just me? After I realized that half the Male Supporting Actor in a Comedy nominees were gay and the guy that won played a gay guy on TV, I felt justified in only watching police chases and pro wrestling. Hell, with the Emmys this gay, I think someone will have to literally be buttfucked onstage at the next Tony awards just for them to stay ahead. I vote the guy from Fela:
It looks like Soulja Boy is set to release a book this month, which talks about how he was a millionaire by the age of 17. In related news, Chris Smith from Kris Kross is also set to release a book soon - From Daddy Mac To Big Mac: How To Transition From The World Of Music To The World Of Fast Food.
First chapter's about wearing your McDonald's polo forward instead of backwards. Fascinating stuff.
In a recent interview, Jay-Z said he would have probably mugged Coldplay frontman and good friend Chris Martin back in his thug days. In response, DMX has stated that, if he was sure Martin was carrying cash, motherfucker he STILL would.
The Black Crowes‘ Chris Robinson said this: "I find it embarrassing that adults are like, 'Taylor Swift is very talented.' She's not. She might be cute, but she's horrible." Throw Justin Bieber in there too and I'm drinking the Kool Aid.
A woman is suing Diddy for age and disability discrimination after she said he fired her from his Bad Boy label and hired a woman 10 years younger. The woman said she had hip replacement surgery and then got addicted to pain medication, which caused Diddy to give her the boot. A lot of people are pointing out that 1) drug addiction is a valid excuse for firing someone and 2) 10 years isn't a huge leap considering the woman is in her late 40's. Still, it's a hell of a thing to do to your grandmother.
And here's a hot chick to close us out.
Not everything was gay at the Emmys - Jewel looked pretty stunning in her gown at the ceremony. Taking her on are Katy Perry's boobs.
Sorry, Jewel, but when Katy whips out those bad boys, everybody's toast. I gotta go with Ms. Perry.
What do you think?
OBX VACATION 10
Since it was a long drive, I made myself a pair of play lists for my vacation in the Outer Banks last week. The first was comprised of tracks from 411 Essential Summer Album Guide. The second was a bunch of tracks either beach related or just good current summer songs. So check it out!
Mitch's 2010 OBX Playlist
1
"Cooler Than Me (Single Mix)"
Mike Posner
2
"California In My Mind"
James Taylor
3
"Road Trippin‘"
Red Hot Chili Peppers
4
"Beach Boy Blues"
Elvis Presley
5
"It It‘s The Beaches"
The Avett Brothers
6
"Island In The Sun"
Weezer
7
"I Like It"
Enrique Iglesias feat. Pitbull
8
"Oceans"
Pearl Jam
9
"Tidal Wave"
Dick Dale
10
"Juggalo Island"
Insane Clown Posse
11
"In My Head"
Jason Derulo
12
"Surf Wax America (Live)"
Weezer
13
"Amongst The Waves"
Pearl Jam
14
"Bustin‘ Surfboards"
The Tornadoes
15
"Surfin‘ Safari"
The Beach Boys
16
"Sails To The Wind"
The Dirty Heads
17
"Ocean Man"
Ween
18
"Permanent Vacation"
Aerosmith
19
"The Trip To Pirate‘s Cove"
Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
20
"Whatcha Say"
Jason Derulo
QUICK ‘n' DIRTY CHART NEWS
NEW RELEASES FOR SEPTEMBER 7, 2010
WHAT EVERYONE WILL BUY
Interpol - Interpol - I guess everyone wanted to get the Labor Day album sales, because next Tuesday looks like the release date that time forgot. Interpol hasn't released an album in three years and their last one went Top 5, so I have to think there's an audience waiting for that. Sara Bareilles might give them a run for their money, but I don't think the young pop singer/songwriter has struck lightning with a single from the new album yet, which will make Kaleidoscope Heart more of a slow burn.
WHAT WILL BE NUMBER ONE
Katy Perry knocked Eminem off the top spot this week, moving just shy of 200k with Teenage Dream. Em fell all the way to #3, actually, as Fantasia proved that adultery sells albums and scored the #2 spot (her highest position yet), moving 112,000 in its first week. Em fell just shy of 100k, which means he sold six figures for something like nine straight weeks - not too shabby. Usher's Versus - a glorified bonus disc for Raymond v Raymond dropped in at #4 and Little Big Town's new one came in at #5, meaning it was a major clean-up week. The Top 10 had 6 new releases overall this week (country act the Randy Rogers Band scored #8 and The Devil Wears Prada got in at #10). In fact, Em and Justin Bieber were the only Top 10 albums this week that are more than two weeks old.
Next week - bye bye Katy - as rock fans get to flex their buying muscles and pick up the new Disturbed album, which should sell in the 140k range. Now 35 is also looking to be a hot seller - why in this digital download era those comps are still popular is beyond me. I think people buy them out of habit. Look for the Goo Goo Dolls and Lyfe Jennings to also get some Top 10 love. And I'm sure Em and Bieber will hang in there, too.
WHAT YOU SHOULD BUY
Jerry Lee Lewis - Mean Old Man: The Killer is an old guy now, but he still knows how to rock. He just needs to bring in some friends to keep people interested. On this one, everyone from Kid Rock to Eric Clapton to Merle Haggard to John Mayer shows up. An interesting piece of rock history that's worth a listen.
WHAT'S HOT ON THE DIAL?
Billboard has about a million charts, so each week I'm gonna round up the #1s from each format. That way, no matter WHAT station you flip to when not using your presets, you'll be aware of what you might hear.
BILLBOARD #1 SINGLES
CHART
SINGLE
POP/OVERALL
HOT 100
Eminem feat. Rihanna – "Love The Way You Lie"
RADIO SONGS
Eminem feat. Rihanna – "Love The Way You Lie"
POP SONGS
Taio Cruz - "Dynamite"
HEATSEEKERS SONGS
Auburn feat. Iyaz - "La La La"
DIGITAL
DIGITAL SONGS
Katy Perry - "Teenage Dream"
RINGTONES
Eminem feat. Rihanna – "Love The Way You Lie"
R&B/HIP-HOP
R&B/HIP-HOP SONGS
Chris Brown feat. Tyga & Kevin McCall - "Deuces"
RAP SONGS
Eminem feat. Rihanna – "Love The Way You Lie"
COUNTRY
HOT COUNTRY SONGS
Blake Shelton - "All About Tonight"
ROCK
ROCK SONGS
Linkin Park - "The Catalyst"
ALTERNATIVE SONGS
Linkin Park - "The Catalyst"
ADULT CONTEMPORARY
ADULT CONTEMPORARY
Train – "Hey, Soul Sister"
ADULT POP SONGS
Katy Perry– "California Gurls"
CHRISTIAN
CHRISTIAN SONGS
Sanctus Real - "Lead Me"
GOSPEL SONGS
Lisa Page Brooks feat. Royal Priesthood - "I Want To Say Thank You"
DANCE
DANCE/CLUB PLAY SONGS
Taio Cruz - "Dynamite"
JAZZ
JAZZ SONGS
Mindi Abair - "Be Beautiful"
LATIN
LATIN SONGS
Enrique Iglesias feat. Juan Luis Guerra – "Cuando Me Enamoro"
REGIONAL MEXICAN SONGS
Banda El Recodo – "Dime Que Me Quieres"
LATIN POP SONGS
Camila – "Alejate De Mi"
TROPICAL SONGS
Enrique Iglesias feat. Juan Luis Guerra – "Cuando Me Enamoro"
INTERNATIONAL
CANADIAN HOT 100
Eminem feat. Rihanna - "Love The Way You Lie"
WEB
iLIKE LIBRARIES
Katy Perry - "Teenage Dream"
iLIKE PROFILES
Overdose - "Overdose"
AOL RADIO
Maroon 5 - "Misery"
YAHOO AUDIO
Drake - "Find Your Love"
MYSPACE SONGS
Drake feat. Lil Wayne - "Miss Me"
Mitch's Picks
Rick Ross feat. Styles P - "B.M.F. (Blowin‘ Money Fast)"
Barenaked Ladies - "Brian Wilson (Live)"
Sundowners - "Mouth Of A Tiger"
This week, the Country Music Association announced the nominees for this year's CMA Awards. Miranda Lambert made history by scoring the nine nominations - the most for any woman in CMA Awards history and tied with Merle Haggard for second-most ever. With that huge accomplishment, I figured we'd make Miranda and some of the other lovely nominees our Pieces of the Week!
THE END
That's all for this week. Make sure to comment on what you liked, didn't like, etc. Till next week, keep your ears to the ground.
