The Slightly Slanted Music News Report 05.31.06
Posted by Jared McGuckin on 05.31.2006
NOW WITH PICTURES! Can life get better, I submit it cannot!
Hello my fellow constituents, and welcome to the latest edition to the Slightly Slanted Music News Report. Remember last week when I said, "I got nothing but time on my hands for a few weeks,"? Well, with that said, I still mange to fill my days not with something constructive, or anything to make me a more active contributor to society, instead I waste the day away playing with my dogs and watching movies. So, with all that said, it should come as no surprise that this column is being written under a certain amount of pressure because it's due in only a few hours. Will I crumble under the pressure and write a shitty column? Or, will I rise to the occasion and write an informative news column with well educated opinion and no grammatical or spelling errors? Probably the former…On to the news!
Sometimes The News Just Writes Itself, But Most Of The Time I Have To Type It Out
The News: Hard rockers, Stone Sour, have changed the release date of their sophomore album, Come What (ever) May, to August 1st. Stone Sour is currently set to be on the bill of the Family Values Tour starting July 27th.
The Slant: No real surprise here, they just released the first single off of the CD last week, so there's no sense in holding off a potentially good album. I'm trying real hard to come with witty or funny here and I got nothing. Stone sour moved up the relase of their upcoming CD, that's it. It's news items like this that show the real flaws in the "The Slant" format. Moving On…
The News: Future Leaders Of The World have announced plans to drop their name and turning to their fans for help renaming the band. For more information, check out the band's myspace pagehere.
The Slant: In an effort to bring you the most comprehensive news possible, I visited the bands myspace page to see what we're up against here. Against my better judgment, I listened to the songs they had posted and I was whisked away to a land where rock musicians wore flannel shirts and ripped jeans. I'm not saying I didn't thoroughly enjoy the 90's, but the Future Leaders Of The World are about 12 years too late with their music. Maybe a new name can help them. Yeah that's it, a new name.
The News: The band Taproot is currently debating leaving their home at Atlantic Records due to disappointing record sales. Their latest album, Blue Sky Research has sold 112, 000 copies, according to Nielson Soundscan. Drummer Jarrod Montague told Billboard.com, "We had hoped for really big things. We worked really hard and made a record that we were really proud of, and we don't know what happened. The situation with Atlantic is a little bit up in the air. There's a good chance we might end up parting ways with them at the end of this [album cycle]."
The Slant: First off, look at that picture, they look like the result of drunken orgy between Weezer and Incubus. It had to be said.
Are they serious, they're going to leave their record company because they weren't happy with the record sales? They should be happy they even have a recording contract. Who the fuck do these guys think they are, Metallica? They're lucky they sold the amount they did considering they completely suck and any redeeming qualities about their music is too far and few between. I hope Atlantic drops these guys just to show them that a third rate band like them is 100% replaceable.
The News: Nu Metal pioneers, Korn have parted ways with touring guitarist Rob Patterson. Patterson, while never an "official" member of Korn, joined them on tour when original guitarist, Brian "Head": Welch left the band after finding God. An unknown replacement has already been made.
Patterson was recruited from the band Otep and was set only to play on stage behind the amps, not to be seen by the audience. As the tours continued Patterson made is way to the front of the stage.
Edit: Right before this report was to posted, Korn released a statement announcing that Patterson is indeed still the touring guitarist and that Fear Factory guitarist Christian Olde Wolbers, was just filling in for a few dates.
The Slant: Korn has slowly but steadily been losing ground with me. I don't care one way or another if Patterson was fired or he got tired of all of Korn's rock star bullshit and quit. The second Korn told him, he was not to be seen by the audience and he had to play behind the amps, he should have high tailed it the fuck outta there.
Mark my words, Korn will forever have problems with keeping a touring guitarist or a permanent replacement for Head.
Edit: I still stand behind my opinions, So what do you think of that?
The News: Powerman 5000 have delayed the release of their upcoming album, titled, Destroy What You Enjoy to August 1st. The first single, Wild World is set to hit radio on June 19th.
The Slant: Laugh at me all you want, but I like Powerman 5000. I think they're fun and don't take themselves too seriously. They're not trying to save the world with "rock n roll" and they're not trying to reinvent to guitar solo they're just playing music. With that said, these guys have always had a problem putting out albums on time, so this should come as no shock to anyone.
The News: Helmet have released the tracklisting for their upcoming album, Monochrome, due out July 18th. The tracklisting is as follows:
1. Swallowing Everything
2. Brand New
3. Bury Me
4. Monochrome
5. On Your Way Down
6. Money Shot
7. Gone
8. Almost Out Of Sight
9. Howl
10. 410
11. Goodbye
The Slant: People still listen to Helmet?
Music You Can See And Hear
What: U.S. Tour
Who:
Drowning Pool
When/Where: July 6th in Boston, MA @ Goodtime Empoirum
July 7th in Manchester, NM @ Mark's
July 12th in Allentown, PA @ Crocodile Rock
July 13th in Baltimore, MD @ Club Mate
July 15th in Flint, MI @ The Machine Shop
More dates TBA
What: U.S. Tour
Who:
10 Years
Soil
Faktion
When/Where: June 20th in Beaumont, TX @ Cactus Canyon
June 21st in Baton Rouge, LA @ Varsity Theatre
June 24th in Pensacola, FL @ Seville Quarter (w/ Socialburn)
June 25th in Tallahassee, FL @ Floyd's
July 2nd in El Paso, TX @ El Paso Country Coliseum (w/ Puddle Of Mudd)
What: U. S Tour
Who:
Alice In Chains (So, it's an old picture, shoot me)
When/Where: August 3rd in Hampton Beach, NH @ Hampton Beach Casino
August 4th in Sayreville, NJ @ Starland Ballroom
August 5th in Bethlehem, PA @ Musikfest River Place
August 11th in Sturgis, SD @ 2006 Sturgis Motorcycle Rally
August 12th in Sioux Falls, SD @ Sioux Empire Fairgrounds
August 13th in Mansfield, MA @ Tweeter Center (Locobazzoka)
U.K. Tour
Who:
Guns N Roses (I had to use that picture, it's too funny not to)
When/Where: July 18th in Sheffield @ Hallam FM Arena
July 19th in Newcastle @ Metro Radio Arena
July 21st in Glasgow @ Secc
July 23 in Manchester @ MEN Arena
July 25th in Birmingham @ NEC
July 27th in Nottingham @ Arena
July 30th in London @ Wembley Arena
U.S. Tour
Who
Rollins Band
When/Where: July 28th in San Francisco, CA @ The Warfield
July 29th in Costa Mesa, CA @ Orange County Fair
July 30th in Agoura Hills, CA @ The Canyon
August 01st in San Diego, CA @ 4th & B
August 02nd in Las Vegas, NV @ House of Blues
August 04th in Salt Lake City, UT @ The Depot
August 05th in Denver, CO @ Ogden Theater
August 06th in Omaha, NE @ Sokol Auditorium
August 07th in Sauget. IL @ Pop's
August 09th in Minneapolis, MN @ The Quest
August 10th in Milwaukee, WI @ The Rave
August 11th in Cleveland, OH @ House of Blues
August 12th in Cincinnati, OH @ Bogart's
August 13th in Chicago, IL @ House of Blues
August 15th in Washington, DC @ 9:30 Club
August 17th in Sayreville, NJ @ Starland Ballroom
August 18th in Philadelpha, PA @ Electric Factory
August 19th in Boston, MA @ Avalon
Any Last Words?
That about does it for this week's haphazard edition. There wasn't much news to report on this week, but I guess that's better then too much news to report on.
