Sex, News & Violins 01.10.07
Posted by Jamie Buttineau on 01.10.2007
Finally some news! The Arcade Fire's bibles glow in the dark, TV On The Radio pack up the afro and take it on the road, Bloc Party may rock both ways if you catch my drift, The Shins echo Chumbawumba, and Neko Case makes me not hate country for just a moment. Which may be a miracle. Plus the epic conclusion to my epic Top 50 albums list! Epic!
Ah finally the news outlets have started pumping out quality music news again. The holidays are finally over and I actually have something to talk about in this new report. Joyous day.
Headlines!
I Wonder How Many People Had To Die To Make This Album
The Arcade Fire have released details about their next album. Yes, you can commence drooling. The band who blew everyone away with their debut album Funeral will release their sophomore album Neon Bible on March 5 in Europe and March 6 in North America. Although I am incredibly excited about the album (we're talking Cartman freezing himself for the Wii excited) and it will likely be fantastic, I have the nagging feeling that it may turn out to be rather disappointing. Although after releasing a critical juggernaut like Funeral expecting the band to top that may be out of the question. Still if it's even half as good as Funeral it'll probably be my favourite album of the year. Here's the tracklisting:
01 Black Mirror
02 Keep the Car Running
03 Neon Bible
04 Intervention
05 Black Wave/ Bad Vibrations
06 Ocean of Noise
07 The Well and the Lighthouse
08 (Antichrist Television Blues)
09 Windowsill
10 No Cars Go
11 My Body Is a Cage
Along with these details, the band has also released more dates for their tour to support Neon Bible. Along with playing in churches and for Ukrainian people in London and Montreal, they'll also be hitting up New York City and pretty much every country in Europe. So if you're looking for something to do in Norway, you know where to go!
Coming to an abandoned church near you!:
01-29 London, England - St John's Church, Smith Square
01-30 London, England - St John's Church, Smith Square
01-31 London, England - St John's Church, Smith Square
02-01 London, England - Porchester Hall
02-02 London, England - Porchester Hall
02-06 Montreal, Quebec - Ukrainian National Federation
02-07 Montreal, Quebec - Ukrainian National Federation
02-08 Montreal, Quebec - Ukrainian National Federation
02-09 Montreal, Quebec - Ukrainian National Federation
02-10 Montreal, Quebec - Ukrainian National Federation
02-13 New York, NY - Judson Memorial Church
02-14 New York, NY - Judson Memorial Church
02-15 New York, NY - Judson Memorial Church
02-16 New York, NY - Judson Memorial Church
02-17 New York, NY - Judson Memorial Church
03-05 Dublin, Ireland - Olympia
03-06 Dublin, Ireland - Olympia
03-08 Manchester, England - Apollo
03-09 Manchester, England - Apollo
03-11 Glasgow, Scotland - Barrowlands
03-12 Glasgow, Scotland - Barrowlands
03-14 London, England - Brixton Academy
03-15 London, England - Brixton Academy
03-19 Paris, France - Olympia
03-20 Paris, France - Olympia
03-23 Stockholm, Sweden - Circus
03-24 Oslo, Norway - Centrum Scene
03-25 Copenhagen, Denmark - Vega
03-27 Berlin, Germany - Postbahnhof
03-28 Munich, Germany - Elserhalle
03-31 Lyon, France - Transbordeur
04-01 Cologne, Germany - E-Werk
04-02 Utrecht, Netherlands - Vredenburg
04-04 Brussels, Belgium - Halles de Schaerbeek
04-05 Lille, France - L'Aeronef
Using The Power Of The Afro For Good, Not Evil
Seriously, screw the musical talent, the real reason to go see TV On The Radio live is to get up close to that afro. That thing is a miracle of nature, a sign from God perhaps. I mean come on, look at this thing!:
Marvellous. Like something from the Renaissance period. But I digress, the band behind the fro will be touring across the country starting at the beginning of March. And these guys kick ass live so it would definitely be worth it. I really regret choosing not to be born into a family of extreme wealth, it's preventing from going to concerts I desperately need to go to left and right. Damn you monetary system that we use today! Damn you!
TV On The Radio on stage on tour:
03-01 Providence, RI - Lupo's Heartbreak Hotel
03-03 Montreal, Quebec - Olympia Theatre
03-04 Toronto, Ontario - Kool Haus
03-06 Cleveland, OH - Agora Theatre & Ballroom
03-08 Indianapolis, IN - Vogue Theater
03-09 Louisville, KY - Brown Theatre
03-10 Columbia, MO - Blue Note
03-12 Chicago, IL - Metro
03-13 Chicago, IL - Metro
03-17 Kansas City, MO - Harrah's Voodoo Lounge
03-19 Denver, CO - Ogden Theatre
03-20 Salt Lake City, UT - Urban Lounge
03-23 Portland, OR - Roseland Theatre
03-24 Vancouver, British Columbia - Commodore Ballroom
03-25 Seattle, WA - Moore Theatre
03-28 San Francisco, CA - Fillmore
03-29 San Francisco, CA - Fillmore
03-30 Los Angeles, CA - Henry Fonda Theatre
03-31 Los Angeles, CA - Henry Fonda Theatre
04-01 Solana Beach, CA - Belly Up Tavern
04-01 Dallas, TX - Gypsy Tea Ballroom
04-05 Austin, TX - La Zona Rosa
04-06 Houston, TX - Meridian
04-09 Orlando, FL - Club at Firestone
04-10 Fort Lauderdale, FL - Culture Room
04-12 Athens, GA - 40 Watt Club
04-13 Atlanta, GA - Variety Playhouse
04-17 Norfolk, VA - NorVA
04-18 Washington, DC - 9:30 Club
04-19 Washington, DC - 9:30 Club
04-21 Poughkeepsie, NY - Vassar College
Apparently There's A Pride Parade Happening During This Particular Weekend In The City
Bloc Party has announced plans for a tour across North America, which I guess means their drummer got over his collapsed lung. Well that's good. Of course the weird part about this story is that lead singer Kele Okereke almost sort of kind of but not really but maybe in a way revealed that he could be gay.
During an interview (which you can see here) with The Guardian, writer Craig McLean asked Kele about his sexuality. Okereke had this to say: "It's not something that I'd be inclined to talk...It isn't black and white. It isn't clear-cut." So what that means I'm not sure. But the smart money is on him either being closeted or bisexual. Which I could care less about, because it's not really news. Ooooooo the lead singer of a band is gay, scandal upon scandal! In five years gay marriage will be legal everywhere, in ten there will probably be almost as many gay couples as there are straight, and by 2030 we'll all be legally allowed to marry llamas while living on big marijuana farms right next a house full of illegal Mexican immigrants who perform abortions while burning the American flag. It's the way of the future and I love it. As long as the band doesn't suck they can dress in pink and dance around a maypole for all I care….What is a maypole anyway?
Back to actual music news, the band's tour to support A Weekend In The City which will arrive on March 6 (the same day as The Arcade Fire's new album…That is going to be a busy day) will also feature opening acts such as Albert Hammond Jr. of The Strokes, Final Fantasy, Sebastien Grangier who used to be one half of Death From Above 1979, The Like and someone or thing called Smoosh. And I think we can all agree that each one of these opening acts is way way way cooler than Panic! At The Disco. Even Smoosh. Here be the dates:
Dates:
01-25 London, England - Mean Fiddler
01-27 Southampton, England - Guild Hall
01-28 Norwich, England - UEA
01-31 London, England - Astoria
02-01 London, England - Astoria
02-02 London, England - Astoria
02-03 Folkestone, England - Leas Cliff Hall
02-05 Reading, England - Hexagon
02-06 Cardiff, Wales - University
02-07 Bristol, England - Academy
02-09 Exeter, England - Great Hall at University
02-10 Birmingham, England - Academy
02-11 Nottingham, England - Rock City
02-13 Cambridge, England - Corn Exchange
02-14 Manchester, England - Academy
02-16 Dublin, Ireland - Ambassador Theatre
02-17 Glasgow, Scotland - Barrowland
02-18 Aberdeen, Scotland - Music Hall
02-20 Edinburgh, Scotland - Corn Exchange
02-21 Newcastle, England - Academy
02-22 Sheffield, England - Octagon
03-04 Tokyo, Japan - Studio Coast
03-05 Nagoya, Japan - Diamond Hall
03-06 Osaka, Japan - Namba Hatch
03-11 Seattle, WA - Paramount Theatre
03-12 Vancouver, British Columbia - Orpheum Theatre
03-13 Portland, OR - Crystal Ballroom
03-15 Austin, TX - SXSW
03-17 San Francisco, CA - Concourse Exhibition
03-19 Los Angeles, CA - Wiltern Theatre
03-20 Los Angeles, CA - Wiltern Theatre
03-23 Chicago, IL - Congress Theatre
03-24 Detroit, MI - Royal Oak Theatre
03-25 Toronto, Ontario - Kool Haus
03-27 Montreal, Ontario - Metropolis
03-28 Boston, MA - Orpheum Theatre
03-30 New York, NY - United Palace Theatre
03-31 New York, NY - United Palace Theatre
05-12 Bologna, Italy - Estragon
05-13 Milan, Italy - Alcatraz
Hear That? That's Zach Braff Having A Geekgasm
If there's one reason to be thankful for Garden State it's that I know have an almost endless supply of witty things to say regarding The Shins and Zach Braff or Natalie Portman. Forever entwined they shall be.
Of course after January 23 I'll have tons of Chumbawumba references at my disposal thanks to them naming their next album Wincing The Night Away. And speaking of the soon to drop album, the band has announced the first batch of dates on their American tour to support the new CD. So take a whiskey drink, take a vodka drink, take a lager drink, and take a cider drink and then buy some tickets. And if you're drunk enough give me the rest of your money. Deep down in your drunken heart you'll know it's the right thing to do.
Dedicated to dead hamsters everywhere:
02-08 Minneapolis, MN - First Avenue
02-09 Milwaukee, WI - Eagles Ballroom
02-10 Chicago, IL - Congress Theater
02-11 St. Louis, MO - The Pagent
02-12 Lawrence, KS - Liberty Hall
02-13 Lawrence, KS - Liberty Hall
02-15 Denver, CO - Fillmore Auditorium
02-16 Salt Lake City, UT - In the Venue
02-20 Seattle, WA - Paramount Theater
02-21 Portland, OR - Crystal Ballroom
02-25 London, England - The Astoria
And remember the band will make their SNL debut on the January 13 show where they will play "Phantom Limb" (which is a nice little ditty) and "New Slang" on the show. It will hosted by Jake Gyllenhaal, so you got moody music with the moody actor from the moody movie Donnie Darko. It's the Saturday Night Live episode girlfriends and indie kids around the world will love.
Who Said I Hate Country Music?
Oh right, I did. Regardless, I am somehow a fan of Neko Case, who's probably the best thing in alt country today. She recently released dates for a tour in the US starting in February which will probably start sometime after her current touring duties with The New Pornographers. Four of the dates will also have Neko opening for famous country music legend Merle Haggard. So grab up your fiddle and take a seat on the bale of hay. Hell you might even get to take part in a hoedown! Keen!
Yee haw!:
02-09 Oakland, CA Paramount Theatre*
02-10 Portland, OR Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall*
02-11 Seattle, WA Paramount Theatre*
02-12 Spokane, WA IMG Performing Arts Center*
02-13 Vancouver, British Columbia - Commodore Ballroom
02-14 Bellingham, WA WWU Performing Arts Center
02-15 Eugene, OR McDonald Theatre
02-16 Santa Cruz, CA The Rio Theatre
02-17 Los Angeles, CA Henry Fonda Theatre
02-18 Solana Beach, CA Belly Up Tavern
02-23 New York, NY Allen Room at the Time Warner Center
* with Merle Haggard
RAPIDFIRE NEWS SMARTASSERY!!
The inductees for the Rock ‘N Roll Hall Of Fame's Class of '07 have been announced. Those that made the cut are REM, Van Halen, Patti Smith, Grandmaster Flash & The Furious Five, and The Ronettes. Van Halen eh? Who the hell even gets that award now? Do Hagar and Roth get to share it? I guess they could split it up so one of them gets it on Monday, Wednesday and Friday and the other one gets it on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. And I guess Eddie can have it on Sundays. And maybe Gary Cherone if they're feeling charitable.
Britney Spears has said that she wants to change her image. Which shouldn't be too hard, all she has to do is build a time machine, go back to two years ago, make sure she never meets Kevin Federline, makes sure she never gets knocked up, and then somehow try to find a way to bring her IQ up about fifty points. Or she could just learn to wear underwear and not be such a terrible mother but the time machine idea seems more plausible.
Over the weekend at a gig, Pete Wentz of Fallout Boy got into a fight and exchanged punches with a member of the security team after the guard got into an argument with the singer over fan interaction. This begs the question, how wimpy must that security guard have been if he couldn't take down Pete Wentz?
Apple has released details for the eagerly anticipated iPhone. The iPhone will sync with your iTunes to play all the music, videos and photos you have on your computer, can download music, can be manipulated with a touch screen, will solve world hunger, can kill any animal that weighs in excess of 150 lbs, can transform into a fully loaded truck (which will also play your music), can double as a pacemaker, can contact Skynet, and will eventually destroy us all. Also, you can talk to people with it. I want one.
Jimmy Eat World is finishing up work on their new album…Yes, apparently Jimmy Eat World is still around and did not vanish off the face of the Earth as previously thought and possibly reported.
Busta Rhymes was charged with assault on January 3. A man accused him of beating him repeatedly over money disputes, saying Rhymes punched and kicked him repeatedly. Well it could have been worse, could have gone like this.
"Sneaky" Pete Kleinow, one of the members of the Flying Burrito Brothers passed away at 72. If I knew who that was I'm sure I would be sad. At least he had a cool nickname.
Rumours that The Police will reunite are spreading around, saying the band could come together for a few shows in 2007. Of course it's probably not that big a deal, since you could just put Sting with two other guys, call them The Police and I doubt anyone could tell the difference.
Whitney Houston is selling over 300 items from her 1999 world tour to help pay some debts. I think that's how you know you've hit rock bottom, when you're a world renowned singer, songwriter, actress and diva and you're paying off your debts by holding a glorified garage sale.
Tyrese reportedly punched his pregnant girlfriend after an argument on Wednesday. Because nothing stirs up a fanbase like the beating of a pregnant woman. Get that man a MTV Video Award! Douche.
Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey finalized their divorce last week. Truly the end of an era. By the way, am I wrong or is Lachey just a better liked, better groomed yet still equally as useless version of Kevin Federline?
In other Jessica Simpson news, there was a rumor going around that the singer was dating Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo. That rumor is apparently false, and was actually spread by Jessica's own father Joe Simpson. In fact the two have never even met. Jeez Joe, first the acid reflux excuse for the Ashlee Simpson lip syncing scandal now this? Man, I hope for your sake you never have an affair because I don't even want to think about what lie you'd come up for that. How do you survive in show business?
Marilyn Manson was filed with divorce papers from his wife of one year Dita Von Tesse, who is of course a burlesque dancer. Apparently Dita (heh) was planning to divorce the singer for several months now but had been unable to find the singer and had even moved out of the house without him knowing. Wow, she must be a really boring burlesque dancer for her husband to completely forget about her.
Now this story is just stupid. Snoop Dogg is getting sued because he just can't go one week without getting in trouble for something. But this isn't about guns or drugs or collapsible batons, this is about little league football. Yeah that's right. Snoop Dogg had signed on for a reality show about his involvement in his football league Snoop Youth Football League Foundation with National Resources Media & Technology Group. However, FOX already has an existing deal with Snoop Dogg for a movie called Coach Snoop and sent out an letter stating that Fox had "exclusive rights to portray Snoop in any motion picture or television project or other production based on Snoop's involvement with his sons' football teams and leagues." Man, who knew there was so much interest in seeing Snoop Dogg and pee wee football? By the way, can you really blame Snoop Dogg for forgetting he had a deal with FOX? The guy is so fried he barely knows where what room he sleeps in, how the hell do you expect him to remember what movie deals he has? Cut the guy some slack!
And now, the moment you've all been waiting for. The conclusion to….
Sex, News & Violins' Top 50 Albums Of The Year!
Now if you've read my contribution to the whole this year in music feature then this may be slightly spoiled for you. But just for the sake of completion here are my Top Ten Albums of 2006.
10. Sunset Rubdown – Shut Up I Am Dreaming
Spencer Krug is quite possibly one of the busiest musicians around the indie scene right now. When he's not playing with Wolf Parade he's got side projects galore with Frog Eyes, Swan Lake (which probably would have made this list had I been able to find it anywhere) and probably his most successful side project to date Sunset Rubdown. If I had to use two words to describe the work of Spencer Krug they would probably be maniacally haunting. The songs can be sad and heartbreaking while still containing a sort of frantic energy about them at the same time. He is one of the best musicians that you'll find anywhere in the world right now and it seems like if a project has Spencer involved then chances are it will a success.
9. Neko Case – Fox Confessor Brings The Flood
Now I don't entirely hate country music. It's just that it's hard for me to respect a musical genre that helped create the careers of Shania Twain, Faith Hill, Toby Keith and Rascal Flatts. I mean with a record like that it would take a hell of a country album for me to like it enough to put it on my top ten list. Oh but look at that, a country album made my top ten list. Neko Case is so good she makes me forget that this is technically country (they call it alt country, because I guess it had a better ring to it than indie country…Man I write the word "indie" a lot in this column). It doesn't surprise me, it seems like most work that comes from the members of The New Pornographers is typically awesome. I have high hopes for Fancey's Schmancey!
8. Cat Power – The Greatest
Ah, the recovering alcoholic. Nothing equals gratifying entertainment more than that premise. Chan Marshall is the champion of sobriety in question. She has long been known for her spastic and unpredictable performances at live shows. Sometimes she would get so wigged out that she would jump offstage and run out of the venue. She was crazy, you never knew what would happen next! But, that's changed now, because she's off the sauce. To be honest I'm unfamiliar with most of Miss Power's material, this being my first album by her. It's soulful and rather beautiful, Marshall has a smoky, jazzy voice that fits the songs perfectly. A gorgeous album with a backing band led by the guitarist for Al Green. Looks like that AA stay produced some of her best work to date. Or so I say at least.
7. Bruce Springsteen – We Shall Overcome: The Seeger Sessions
Now this is an eclectic selection. Bruce Springteen, he of Born In The USA fame doing an album of songs originally written by folk music musician Pete Seeger. So, the leader of the E Street Band makes an album of songs written by the same guy who wrote "Froggie Came A Courtin'"? I should not like this. I don't even really like Bruce Springsteen. Yet I love this album. It all just clicks and comes together for reason and works better than it has any right to. It is full of energy and excitement and I think it has something to do with the fact that this album was recorded live in Springsteen's barn with Springsteen acting as conductor instead of a regular studio. It's definitely the best album of folk music covers you're likely to find anywhere.
6. Joanna Newsom – Ys
Probably the latest entry to the list, just barely sneaking into the top ten after being released in late November. It's basically your typical bizarre indie fodder. Joanna Newsom is a harpist who sings long, sprawling epic songs that sound like literary works from the 19th century. The album is made up of only 5 songs, the shortest one being being just a little over 7 minutes and the longest one being nearly 17 minutes. And yes, it's awesome. We live in a world where a woman who plays the harp makes better music than almost everybody else around. Strange times indeed.
5. Lupe Fiasco – Food & Liquor
THE Best hip hop album of the year. You can try to sell me your Nas, or your The Game, or your Clipse, or your Young Jeezy, but I disagree (well I haven't really listened to the Clipse album yet. I hear good things though)! Lupe Fiasco put out the single best rap album this year, an album that for some reason hasn't gone platinum yet. Hell this album has a song about a zombie gangsta coming to life and digging out of his own grave! How can you not buy this album?! Not even an appearance by one of the Linkin Park douchebags can dilute its greatest! Go out and buy ten copies, and give them to everyone you know. Now!
4. Yo La Tengo – I Am Not Afraid Of You And I Will Beat Your Ass
Well naturally a band that hangs around the indie scene for over 20 years is going to release some great albums. At this stage the expectations are so high that anything less than great is immediately disappointing (this sentiment is the same for you too Arcade Fire. Did not disappoint me you French Canadian weirdoes!). And YLT did not disappoint. Now once again I must plead ignorance to the rest of their catalogue, I have not heard a single other album (or even other song) by this band other the one I am currently talking about. But this one would be pretty hard to top. For the name alone if anything (seriously, best album title of all time. I'm calling it right here).
3. The Decemberists – The Crane Wife
Hyper-literate prog rocks goes mainstream? It happened. The Decemberists had a busy year, releasing their first album on their new major label Capitol, went on a big tour, won critical accolades from almost everybody in the industry and even battled Stephen Colbert in a guitar battle that they lost only because they went up against the awesome might of Peter Frampton. It was kind of unfair really, I mean Frampton even got to use his talk box! That gave him the edge! Still, the band made it big this year and part of it is because they released a great album. And they didn't compromise at all despite the larger audience. In fact, they made their album be about a woman who was actually a bird who marries a guy and makes clothing out of her feathers and then turns back into a bird. Which had to suck for the husband, having been fucking a bird and all. There's also a 12 minute song on here based on Shakepeare's play The Tempest that has a kickass prog keyboard solo. So if you like your prog rock to be hyper literate, you know where to go.
2. Final Fantasy – He Poos Clouds
I declared Yo La Tengo's album the best album title ever, but this may be in the running for the best album with the worst title. Owen Pallett is the violinist for The Arcade Fire but also has a solo project where he's known as Final Fantasy. As you can probably tell from the name he's a bit of a geek. Most of the songs on the album are based on the schools of magic from Dungeons & Dragons, along with references to The Legend Of Zelda and The Chronicles Of Narnia. And one song has something to do with the massive genitals of some Toronto real estate dealer…Yeah I don't know either. The album won the Polaris Music Prize, which is like the Shortlist Prize, only it's for Canada. Also apparently he's gay, funny how that keeps popping up this week. A brilliant album that deserves the praise it receives, although if I had one complaint about it it's that it was a bitch to find. Seriously, get this guy more exposure!
1. TV On The Radio – Return To Cookie Mountain
And finally here it is. Out of 50 albums I've heard this year, this is hands down the best album of 2006. TV On The Radio's debut album was an interesting if strange blend of alt rock, experimental music and do wop. Here, everything blends together perfectly to create an unique and amazing album that truly has to be experienced. "Wolf Like Me" may be my favourite song of 2006. The band has also completely rocked apart all of their live TV appearances. The band is so good that David Bowie even volunteered to lend his vocals on the track "Province". When the Sovereign, the leader of the Guild of Calamitous Intent himself wants to appear on your album well then you know you got a good thing going. So by all means, buy this album and let the mighty afroed greatness of TV On The Radio touch your heart as it has mine.
Such an amazing afro.
IT'S OVER!!
My usual problem with writing these columns is I can never think of anything witty to say at the very end. Sadly today is no different. Adios reader folk!
