411 Music Fact Or Fiction 4.23.08: Week 54
Posted by Dan Haggerty on 04.23.2008
Ben Czajkowski and Dan Marsicano enter the music arena to turn up the volume on your music news: Is Mariah Carey this generation’s top diva? Will Opeth deliver on their new album? Has Fred Durst outlived his usefulness to the music scene? Is Janes Addiction an underrated influence on alternative? Will you be checking out the new AC/DC album? Plus “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” invades the video of the week!
Oh boy… Now you've done it.
You clicked the link.
Now you're committed to the show! And a great show we have for you. We look at old favorites and rising icons, starts that burn bright today and those who might be washed up, at Bands with modern weird titles and movies with old weird themes. Man we got it all. So sit back, grab a cold one (two if you're at work), and enjoy today's run through the wonderful and wacky world of music.
Today we bring back two favorites to throw down the walls of convention with their volatile brand of high octane opinion. First we have you the man who delivers the Monday News Report, the rock that starts your week, he's All You Can't Live Without, Ben Czajkowski! Also starting out your Monday's in high style is the Music Zones answer to Headbangers Ball, reviewer and news dude for the rest of the week, he darea to ask What the Hell Happened to… , Dan Marsicano! I'm your host, Dan Haggerty, and it's my job to ask the questions and keep score, even though the score has no consequences… That's right, I'm afraid the score is a sham that has no consequences. Like getting caught repeatedly doing drugs on internet videos. Just saying.
Hey – It's Music, its news, and we're 411 so you're getting real views. This is week Fifty-Four of Fact or Fiction: Music and it starts now!
Round 1!
"I like being on top…"
1. Mariah Carey is this generation's top diva.
Dan Marsicano: Fact: Carey is one of the best selling female pop singers of all time, with more singles, 18, than any other singer. Unlike most of the so called "divas" out there, she is involved with charities and other organizations out there to help those in need. Even with a few bumps in the road, Carey is still on top of the world with no where to go but up. People will criticize her (especially me), but there is no doubt the impact she has had on the world of pop music. She isn't Madonna, but what female singer can even come close to the success she has had?
Ben Czajkowski: Fact: Mariah Carey has been the object of pop-culture affection since her self-titled, first album and her Grammy Win as "Best New Artist". I find it hard-pressed to believe that she'll suddenly fall from that grace, after being here since the early 1990s. Her duet with Boyz II Men only proved that Carey was in a class above anyone else. She doesn't get caught up in flaming wars, nudity scandals. And yeah, she actually does something with her life, which is more than I can say for, oh, perhaps, Madonna? If Carey is not the top, then she's damn sure near it. Oh, and I'd hit that.
Score :1 for 1
2. Someone needs to tell Fred Durst that he's outlived his usefulness in the music scene
Dan Marsicano: Fact: Durst outlived his usefulness five years ago. Remember Results May Vary? Or how about The Unquestionable Truth Pt.1? Remember how well those two albums did? No, you don't? Well, that's because you probably never heard them. Don't worry, you can get in line with the millions of others who swept the band under the rug after the god-awful Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water. The only talented member of the band, Wes Borland, is thankfully doing his own thing, and kicking a lot of ass at it btw, with Black Light Burns. Believe it or not, we may have a new Limp Bizkit album soon. Can you feel the excitement in the air for it? No, neither can I.
Ben Czajkowski: Fiction: I heavily disagree that Fred Durst has outlived his usefulness. Durst and Limp Bizkit have been putting out quality music for years, and will continue to after he becomes a successful director. This world needs more people like him. Hahaha. I'm just fucking with you all. The only usefulness Durst has is as a rock and roll clown that does cocaine. This delicious piece of white trash makes the rest of the rock world look awesome (which it kind of needs right now). Despite my enjoyment of many of LB's tracks, I try to keep in mind that he's not the only person who works on Bizkit's music. I have a lot of respect for Wes Borland and his new band, and all of the previous work he did, including The Unquestionable Truth. Durst, on the other hand, needs to head back to the trailer park and wash his fucking cap. It's not red anymore.
Score :2 for 2
3. Opeth will deliver on their new album
Dan Marsicano: Fact: Dan, you kidding me right now? Hell, I wrote two columns on the band…back to back! Of course, their new album will deliver. There is no way in the world that it can't. I'm serious…it's a physical impossibility. It can be explained in a simple math equation;
Opeth+ New Album= Instant Classic
What more really needs to said? Hell, I've only heard one song from it, "Heir Apparent," and I almost creamed my pants. June 3rd can't come soon enough.
Ben Czajkowski: Fact:As a newfag Opeth fan, I find myself really appreciating their work, as of late. I am anxiously awaiting the new disc, Watershed, especially the cover of Alice In Chains' "Would." As of right now, I am slated to see them May 15 in Pittsburgh. Unfortunately, I don't think this is going to break into the mainstream in North America, especially with how shitty and monotonous things have been, as of late. However, Opeth will still continue to pwn bitches in Europe.
Intermission Score :3 for 3
Beware the "Ghosts of Perdition"…
SWITCH!
The mighty music zone's "Top 5" has returned. Be sure to check it out:
Round 2!
4. Jane's Addiction doesn't get the credit it deserves for pioneering modern alternative music.
Ben Czajkowski: Fiction: I have to disagree because they don't deserve credit for doing anything. Yeah, they put out two albums that had a couple of good radio singles, but I don't think Perry Farrell and the members of Jane Addiction ever did anything to herald themselves as "pioneers" in a genre of rock that I don't even believe to be a legitimate label. And I don't know what dick they sucked to get a "godlike genius award" or whatever the fuck that is, but I know they have not influenced rock enough to be geniuses. In the words of the band, I suggest they take them to heart: "No way!/Gonna stop, Now; go!" Away. Move on.
Dan Marsicano: Fiction: I'm not going to be as harsh as Ben was on the band, but no, I think they get enough credit as it is. On a side note though, "Godlike Genius Award?" God, that has to be the stupidest fucking name for an award of all time. What's next, "Heavenly Super Duper Intelligent Award?" Fuck…okay, where were we? Oh yeah, Jane's Addiction. I'll keep this short and simple. They kick ass, their records range from solid to excellent, and their influence on alternative music is apparent. Hell, it must be for them to win the covenant "Godlike Genius Award." Wow, did I hate typing that a second time.
Score :4 for 4
5. You'll be checking out the new AC/DC album when it comes out.
Ben Czajkowski: Fiction: No. Why would I waste my time? Nothing AC/DC has ever done has particularly impressed me; not even their rock-radio hits. I find their music to be bland and b-sides of every other big hair band from mid-last century. I guess they got to make their drug money somehow.
Dan Marsicano: Fact: Your telling me you won't give one track a listen Ben? God, somebody didn't get their hug today. Of course I'm going to check out the new AC/DC album, just out of morbid curiosity alone. It's been eight years since a new AC/DC album, and my expectations are very low. Why? This way, if it sucks, I don't feel disappointed. If it's awesome, then I'll love it.
Score :4 for 5
Time for another video Fact or Fiction!
6. Best-Rock-Musical-Ever...
Ben Czajkowski: Fact: Everyone better be "time-warping" as you read this column today. Oh, this video makes me laugh over and over again. How could you not say "Rocky Horror Picture Show" is the best rock-music—nay—musical in the history of people doing acid? As a cult classic, RHPS has captured the imagination of slow kids and social misfits alike. Midnight showings, people dressing up as the characters, off-Broadway plays. As for this song, I think this deserves a "godlike genius award." Fuck Jane's Addiction. Best part of the movie isn't this song, however: it's Meatloaf dying.
Dan Marsicano: Fact: It's a toss up between this and "Tommy," but the "Rocky Horror Picture Show" is definitely the best rock musical of all time. I actually just recently watched the movie for the first time, and while I had no idea what the hell was going on half the time, it was still the most amazing 90 minutes I've spent in a while. Hell, it was worth it just for the appearance by Meatloaf. Unlike Ben, I think that the best part was "Time Warp" and Meatloaf's song "Hot Patootie". His death was surprisingly depressing to me. Oh, and Tim Curry is the fucking man. I couldn't see anybody else in the role of Frank-N-Furter.
Final Score :5 for 6
From The Archives - Classic 411Music Fact Or Fiction!
We're going back to Week 37 6. Alice Cooper on Ozzy Osbourne - "Most fans thought he lived in a big, dark castle with skeletons in the cellar. When that show aired they knew he was just some guy who potters around his Beverly Hills mansion. It was meant to be some kind of comedy but the audience was laughing at Ozzy, not with him. And as a close friend, that made me very sad."
Dan Marsicano: Fact. A million times over. Remember when Ozzy use to be a badass evil guy? Remember the Ozzy who bit the head off a bat and was being sued for suicidal subliminal messages in his music? Well, thanks to The Osbournes, Ozzy is now known as an old man who nobody can understand. Watching that show made me sad, as my hero, my icon, was reduced to nothing more than a joke. The Osbournes destroyed Ozzy's reputation and changed the way the American public saw the heavy metal god.
Ben Czajkowski: Fact. Wow, this weeks FoF is about washed up rock losers through and through. Another great theme-linked group here, Dan…I don't even know where to begin with this one. It would be way too easy to sit here and tear Ozzy apart and then listen to the crying of the people who read this in their "Black Sabbath" tee-shirts. It's a crying shame, but the reality of this statement is that Ozzy has always been a drugged out, incomprehensible pop icon. Yeah, he was big, dark, and scary, but so were Marilyn Manson and Pee Wee Herman, but how do we feel about them today? We laugh at them. We laugh at all of these people because we have become so desensitized to the thoughts of them. Again, when you hit rock bottom, you look for ways to keep yourself in the mainstream, like doing your own shitty, reality television show about your life and fucked up kids, putting together a crappy album, or making your tour free so people will go and listen to you try to sing like you used to. Ozzy should have burned out long ago; now we can only hope he'll fade away.
And on those happy words, it's time for me to thank Dan and Ben again for participating with some great answers - Always a pleasure. Also big kudos goes out to you, the reader. Without you this would be just a glorified blog, and that would just be silly. I would also like to thank all of the sexually challenged rock and roll clown transvestites who creamed their pants becoming newfags to earn a God-like genius award. Without you, the comments in this column would have never happened. As for me, I'm out of here. I'll see you this Friday in the The Mosh Pit and we'll see you back here is seven.
Ben has lost any credibilty in my eyes after the AC/DC comments.
Posted By: G-Walla (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 01:00 AM
Wait a sec, when the hell has Fred Durst put out anything even vaguely resembling quality music????
Posted By: coyotespaw (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 03:33 AM
Ben Czajkowski's comments on ac/dc were wrong and he obviously has no taste in music.
FACT
Posted By: johnny (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 03:34 AM
AC/DC is not hair metal nor known for doing lots of drugs.
get your shit straight.
Posted By: Joe22 (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 04:38 AM
How are you going to have a discussion on "Greatest Rock-Musical" and not include "Jesus Christ Superstar"? Whether its the Original with Gillan or the movie version with Ted Neely....really. Nothing's more rock than Jesus' Halford-esque "Get OUUUUTTT!!" in the temple scene. Go experience some real rock-musical goodness, youngins!
Posted By: Ultimate Gene (Registered) on April 23, 2008 at 09:01 AM
Ben, seriously. This is like the third or fourth time you've spewed nonsense in FOF. You seem like you are just fishing for controversy, and it comes across as mis-informed and pathetic. I like your Monday column, but you are pure garbage anytime I see you in FOF. Remember that douchebag Scotty Flamingo from the Movies section that wrote that flamebait column The Bullseye, probably the most inept excuse for a weekly recurring article ever? You're like that. Stick to Monday's. I imagine you fancy yourself as edgy and inciting the readers or some notion like that, but it isnt the case.
Posted By: Jeff L (Registered) on April 23, 2008 at 09:32 AM
The first Limp Bizkit album (Three Dollar Bill Y'all) was a great album but everything after that went significantly downhill. Durst needs to keep rollin' rollin' rollin' into obscurity.
Posted By: DrBdan (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 09:44 AM
Ben, I'm totally with you man. The uneducated ears that think AC/DC is superior music are irrelevant. All AC/DC has at this point is nostalgic value mainly because these teenage kids think that if you like 80's, you are cool. Their music is generic at best, the vocals are whined out with very little skill, and their band presence at this point is boring and dull. For all you people praising AC/DC, I urge you to take at least 10 of the main bands of the 80's (if you even know more than AC/DC) and listen to them. I can guarantee that musically, you will find that AC/DC triple bogeys over bands like Metallica, Dreamtheatre, Slayer, Judas Priest, even fucking Journey.
Most people are just sheep and listen to what they are told is cool. AC/DC were good in their time because they were more of the mainstream back in the day. Sorry, let me give you a new age example.
Opeth is better than pretty much everyone musically, yet bands like Fallout Boy sell more records. Why? The drones are told Fallout Boy is better because they dress like fags and they have sex appeal because being dressed like an emo fag is cool. Did I miss the meeting where Image was more important the Music?
Well clearly I'm getting myself worked up over this now, but Ben, you are totally right. Thank you for not being one of the corrupt. Everyone PLEASE PLEASE argue with me and try to prove me wrong, I'm dying to make you look foolish
Posted By: Tubby (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 10:54 AM
Ben, what kind of music do you like? If you don't like AC/DC or Ozzy I can't imagine what you're into.
No woman since the early 90's even compares to Mariah Carey. I just wish she would go back to standing at the mic and singing. As good as she looks shaking her ass, a million others can do that, and none of them have her vocal ability.
Posted By: Jason (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 10:59 AM
Ben and Dan, you need to respect Limp Bizkit,not just b/c they're the only band besides the Beatles to sell over a million records in one week. But b/c they made good music. I know most of the people who shit on them now just b/c some rock magazines told them to, were first in line to buy The Chocolate Starfish album. And as talented as Wes is, he's an idiot for leaving the rest of the Bizkit hanging, he did it twice. Just b/c he was afraid of "selling out." I have respect for Durst and you should too. Listen to Chocolate Starfish again. It sure beats the hell out of any rock album that's come out since its release. I'll bet you guys listen to Coldplay huh.
Posted By: MilesBennetDyson (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 11:39 AM
holy shit... speaking of flame-baitiing, "Listen to Chocolate
Starfish again. It sure beats the hell out of any rock album that's come out
since its release." If you are serious please go kill yourself now...
Posted By: PUNK (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 12:09 PM
PUNK, I think I'd kill you
Posted By: MilesBennetDyson (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 12:35 PM
Miles has a point. Limp Bizkit is one of those bands that I like to call closet bands. Everyone listened to them before, but are embarrassed about it now. Every musician in Limp Bizkit is good in his own way, but Fred being an elite of rock? Well I do disagree with that. Fred is a good showman, not songwriter. He was Limp Bizkit because of his ability to put on a hell of a show, but he's proven he doesn't cut it as the main piece to Limp Bizkit. That title belongs to Wes for the most part. Fred was the reason of the downfall and destruction of LB, and that can't be denied. If he cleaned up his act these days, he could very well establish himself as a great director, but he lacks ambition
Posted By: Tubby (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 12:59 PM
Rocky Horror and Grease are the only movie rock musicals worth watching. Tommy and Pink Floyd's The Wall (and wonderfully reviewed recently by Will Helm in the Misunderstood Masterpiece column) are practically almost unwatchable.
Posted By: JLAJRC (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 04:28 PM
Black Light Burns sold a grand total of 27,000 cpies of their album. Guess who the most irrelevant member of LimpBizkit ACTUALLY is :|
Posted By: tomnationwide (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 05:26 PM
ugh, ben, what a disappointment...songs like "Ride On," "Gone Shootin'" and "Night Prowler" are some of the best "chill out" rock songs ever written, josh homme dreams of writing stuff so mellow, yet heavy...the drug money comment is just sour grapes, the dudes in radiohead do a ton of drugs, thats the only way to explain why they think that shit makes a lick of sense, but noone says shit because Blender and Spin love them...limp bizkit is about as relevant as Brinty Fox
Posted By: josh (Guest) on April 23, 2008 at 08:42 PM
Miles get your facts straight, NSYNC sold over a million in one week too. So we're right up there with Limp Bizkit.
Posted By: Justin T. (Guest) on April 25, 2008 at 12:56 AM
I have got to say that I love the respect for Rocky Horror. It takes a real man to come out and say that they love a movie about Tim Curry in drag. You guys are right though, it is a classic.
And to the guy that compared Limp Bizkit to my beloved Beatles, whether you meant it as a direct comparison or not, that is heresy!
Posted By: Blake Lauderback (Registered) on April 25, 2008 at 01:45 AM
Four words: "Pink Floyd - The Wall". Everything else bows down before it.
The popularity of RHPS stems from people wanting to be seen liking it, not because its worth it. The movie sucks total donkey-dinglers!!
Posted By: Michael (Guest) on April 25, 2008 at 10:24 AM
Limp Bizkit and "quality music" in the same sentence without the use of any kinda negation?
excuse me.
Bwahahahahahahaha.....
....ahahaha.
Also, AC/DC being called "80's rock"? Log on the wiki-fucking-pedia, dude. It'll take only a minute. Enlighten your inept gray cells.
That also applies for Tubby. Get your fucking timeline straight.
Posted By: What'Synn the box, Jack? (Registered) on April 26, 2008 at 05:01 AM
