The Individualist 01.03.06: Conservative Elites

Posted by Joe Rivett on 01.03.2006

Laura Ingraham, Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, Michael Savage, and even our president talk about Liberal elites, yet aren’t they elite as well?

Before I begin today's column, I just returned from my honeymoon in Paris and I learned a lot about the French that I wanted to briefly point out.

1. They all speak English so you do not need to know French. If you speak French to them, most of them will reply in English because your accent gives you away.
2. The French do not hate Americans; they just hate dumb redneck Americans, and who could blame them? This is probably why they hate George W Bush. Although, Bush is not really a redneck because he makes far more money than some hick does in a trailer park. He also is not dumb, but often pretends to be so people can misunderestimate him.
3. Its French Canadians that really hate Bush the most.
4. France is the only country where I had to pay to use a toilet.
5. MTV France is better than MTV USA because they actually play videos!
6. French people love Snoop Dogg which is impressive considering there is no translation for the phrase "fo shizzle my nizzle".
7. French TV shows boobs on broadcast TV!!! In the phone sex commercials the chicks are already naked which rather takes away the purpose of phone sex because you can just spank it while you watch free commercials.

While in France I purchased a book written by Larry Flynt about the first amendment and the Right Wing's disregard for it. In his book, he makes a very strong attack against the idea of "Liberal Elites" made by the Conservative wackos such as Laura Ingraham. Yet, while Laura Ingraham makes this attack, she is a multimillionaire who is Harvard educated and clerked for the Supreme Court. Not exactly, the typical average American female.

Laura Ingraham published a book called Shut up and Sing which I guess is about how Hollywood actors and singers, (aka Elites) should stop criticizing the president and do what they are paid to do. Yet, I am going to guess she did not bother to mention to Charlton Heston that he should put his gun away and act. Why is it that when Hollywood actors give a political opinion they are elitist but actors/singers such as Arnold, Heston, Charlie Daniels and that asshole that wrote the "And I'm Proud to be an American" song get a free pass?

Look, I hate elitists of both parties. I cannot stand every time I hear Spike Lee talking about the levees blown up, despite no evidence, or Tim Robbins talking about how many Iraqi children we have murdered. HOWEVER, people like Laura Ingraham and Ann Coulter are elite former lawyers now turned entertainers are no different from Lee or Robbins. They cannot accuse people of being elitist when they are the elites of society.

This brings me to my number 2 point, about France and George Bush not being a redneck. George Bush is the epitome of an elite and a fortunate son. Having your daddy as a UN Ambassador and President and because of his connections making millions of dollars in failed business ventures I think qualifies you as an elite. I just have the feeling that GW did not get into the business of politics to help the "common man".

His initial tax cut did very little for me or my family as over 50% of Americans paid less than one hundred dollars in taxes than they paid in the Clinton years. Oh, so somehow we have been conned into believing that by allowing the rich to get richer that will somehow benefit my barely middle class income? If George Bush really cared about the common man and not rich elites, he would just end taxes for poor people and lower middle class. That way they could spend more money which would increase the profitability of US firms and rich people anyway. Clinton proved you could raise taxes on the rich and still have a booming economy.

Another man who often talks about elites is Rush Limbaugh. Never mind the fact that his daddy was a judge who also owned a radio station. Limbaugh is also a hypocrite when he talks about Christian family values yet he has been divorced twice and is in the process of a third one. Rush's listeners are not exactly Joe Sixpacks as the majority of his listeners are above average in education or income.

Michael Savage is no average American with a PhD from Berkeley. Yet a man this smart and well educated wants to repeal the Sedition Acts because he sees protestors, (not terrorists) as the real enemy. He also wants to make English the official language. Not surprisingly, the official language of France is French. However, when I was there many directions were in English, Spanish, German, and Japanese. I did not even need to speak French because almost every person knew enough English to have a conversation with me. I really do not understand why these conservative elites fear people speaking other than English. It is not like making English the official language is going to make companies ignore the fact that many Americans or tourists do not speak English.

Another conservative elitist is Ann Coulter. She went to Cornell and launched a paper there called the Cornell Review. She soon went on to found a Michigan Chapter of the Federalist Society while working as a corporate lawyer. She later served as an aide to a senator and worked on Paula Jones' defense team.

All of these aforementioned people are elites. They make millions of dollars and had a very nice upbringing. Yet, somehow these people have been able to convince much of America that liberals are the elite ones. I am not liberal or conservative, (I'm pragmatic) but it does not make sense to accuse one group of people of being something that you already are. It would be like Hitler accusing Stalin of being an evil murderer.

So why am I attacking the conservative elites? Well, I cannot attack liberals for being elite because they do not make a big deal about the other side being elite. I just really detest hypocrites. Secondly, I had a bad experience in France with an elite. In the Charles De Gaulle Airport, I had to take a bus from security to my gate. A woman about college age entered the bus fuming about how the airport was worse than a third world country. She was so mad that she refused to buy a magazine because she did not want to contribute to the French economy. She then went on to bitch about how bad the food was in first class on her trip through Prague, Greece, Rome and France.

Listening to this woman enraged me. I felt like the luckiest guy in the world to be able to afford a honeymoon to Paris on my barely middle class salary. Sitting in coach eating hospital-like food did not make me mad because I felt lucky just to be there. The woman I encountered was too elitist to appreciate the smaller things in life. She does not know what it is like to be a regular person. Unfortunately, the president and many of the aforementioned elite do not know what it is like either. Yet, many of us: elect, listen to, and give our money to people that do not give a damn about us. These people care more about gay marriage than how bad the divorce rate is hurting our children. These people care more about the health of a fetus than a human. These people care about the fact that the wealthy have to pay a death tax when I am going to inherit shit from my parents. To all my regular readers here at 411, (Because all the elitists are apparently reading the New York Times for their source of political information and opinion), Happy New Year!!!