The Zack Morris NBA CellPhone 03.02.07

Posted by Matt McCready on 03.02.2007

Hello everybody, welcome to the second edition of the Zack Morris NBA CellPhone. In this one we’ll be looking at a devastating injury to a high school legend, the rookie of the year and everybody’s favorite guy; Vince Carter and for some reason A YETI!

Hello everybody! Welcome to the second edition of the Zack Morris NBA CellPhone. In this one we'll be looking at a devastating injury to a high school legend, the rookie of the year and everybody's favorite guy; Vince Carter!



Who is the rookie of the year?

The NBA rookie class in the year of 2007 has been unimpressive bunch. There's no LeBron James or Chris Paul this year and there's barely even a Mike Miller. It's a pretty sad state of affairs when a 29 year old Jorge Garbajosa is in the mix for the award while not even averaging 10 points per game. This year the front runners for the award are Brandon Roy and Andrea Bargnani.

The reasons to select Roy are compelling. If one were to look at the numbers alone, most would have Brandon Roy ranked higher than Bargnani on this list. And most do, as Roy is the rookie of the year on nearly all of the pundits lists. He's displayed a smooth all around game as he rebounds well for a guard, shows good vision on the court, hits his free throws and has hit a few crucial shots down the stretch of close games. Also from a marketing perspective, as pointed out by about ninety percent of articles promoting him as the rookie of the year, his last name is an acronym for Rookie Of the Year. If there's one thing the NBA loves, it's catchy slogans and catchier headlines.


"C'mon people now smile on your brother…"
Brandon Roy (seen here in his college days) is enjoying a great rookie year

Andrea Bargnani also displays many characteristics of a future star in the NBA. His main calling card right now is his offence. ‘Il Mago' possesses a spectacular face-up game for a 7-1 245 pound athlete, even at this stage of his career. The release on his jumpshot is extraordinarily quick, it has a high release point and is as smooth as a manatee's belly while his range extends well past the three-point arch. He's getting better at using the pumpfake, as nearly any player guarding him at the perimeter must jump to contest his shot, which he then combines with his unnaturally quick first step to create a plethora of offensive opportunities. Mid-range jumpers, thunderous dunks, creative lay-ups and innovative passes are all options for the talented Italian.

Bargnani's solid frame and block numbers while playing for Benetton Treviso would indicate that he would be a decent defender right off the bat in the NBA, (despite claims to the contrary before he came into the league from Dick Vitale and the usual suspects) and that has turned out to be the case. While he does have problems staying in front of small forwards on the perimeter (no surprise given his height) his interior defense is actually really good, he blocks and alters a lot of shots and even has a wide enough lower body to not get pushed around by all but the bulkiest of opposition. When he, Chris Bosh and Rasho Nesterovic are all in the game at the same time, the Raptor interior defense is the best in the team's history (which isn't saying much).


Andrea Bargnani: Combining Dirk Nowitzki's game with the soulful groove of Micheal Buble

His biggest deficiency so far in his NBA career has been his rebounding. While it could partially be attributed to having a more perimeter oriented game and not being in prime rebounding areas, his seemingly exceptional hands don't seem to translate to catching rebounds as he frequently fumbles the ball. His instincts are poor and he even has a tendency to not block out his man, although that's improved as the year has progressed.

Where the value of each player is really displayed in is each of their respective teams' win/loss percentage. While Roy is expected to play a more integral role in his team than Bargnani does, his team does not reap the benefits of that added responsibilities. Heading into the All-Star break, the Trail-Blazers have a winning percentage of 43 percent with Roy injured while they have a winning percentage of 40 percent with him in the lineup (these statistics are accurate up until the All-Star break). So while he's expected to take the important shots and create the important plays, so far he hasn't converted enough of them to make an impact with his team. On the other hand, the Raptors have improved considerably since Bargnani became a regular in the rotation. In games where he's played less than 15 minutes the Raptors have a record of three wins and eight losses (27 percent) while they have a record of 26-16 since he entered the starting lineup. Most teams are unable to combat the shooting range of both Chris Bosh and Andrea Bargnani. While some teams might have a big man who could guard a shooter on the perimeter, it's extremely rare that a team would have two of them.

This indispensable new weapon that Bargnani gives the Toronto, and it's impact on the team's success, is the reason I would vote for Andrea Bargnani as the rookie of the year.

*Please note I included one game where Roy played 6 minutes without a point before injuring himself in the ‘games injured' category and all of the winning percentages were recorded before the All-Star break.


"The Referee just penalized Vince Carter for being so damn handsome!"

In Vince Carter news, a reporter sat down next to him at the All-Star game and asked ‘where are you going to be after the season?' Vince replied ‘In Florida' referring to his residence in that State. Of course the reporter was asking where Vince was going to be PLAYING following the off-season where Vince Carter has the option to be a free agent and Orlando would be a prime candidate to land him.

Upon realizing his snafu, Vince curled into a ball of embarrassed laughter and had an exasperated look on his face, knowing the comment would spur controversy. It's exactly those types of comments that made Toronto area writers like Dave Feschuk hate him.

My girlfriend, brother and I attended the New Jersey Nets/Toronto Raptors game on Valentine's Day. Vince had a bad shooting night facing a consistent Raptor double team, but he frequently found Bostjan Nachbar and Eddie House wide open and Carter finished with ten assists. Following the tradition that began with about 7 months left in his Raptor tenure, the Toronto faithful booed Vince Carter every time he touched the ball. And they booed him vehemently and without remorse. It creates a very rambunctious atmosphere and I'm a big fan of it, even though I'm a big fan of Vince's theatrics.

As fun as it is to boo Vince Carter in a arena full of haters, it's ten times more enjoyable to cheer Vince Carter in an arena full of haters.


They weren't saying boo they were saying UUuuuuuuuuuu-MAGA!

My brother and I developed a competition on who could shout the more ridiculous Vince braggadocio, the point being to either silence or straight out confuse the sea of hate surrounding us. He probably won with the comment of "The Ref just penalized Vince Carter for being so damn handsome!" I mean if you're a Vince hater how do you even respond to that?

A lot of columns were mentioning Vince joking around with the Air Canada Center chant of M-V-P directed at Raptor star Chris Bosh.

They might also tell you that last year when Carter slapped former teammate Morris Peterson across the face, it wasn't him joking with a friend, the real reason was because Vince hates him and was jealous of him playing his shooting guard spot.


Toronto Star reporter/Fashionista Dave Feschuk

By the way, most of the Toronto media suggested the possibility of Vince being jealous of Chris Bosh's ‘M-V-P!' chants that were directed to him by the crowd, seeing they never treated ‘Air Canada' that way. Untrue. During the Philadelphia/Raptors playoff series in 2001, Vince received the ‘M-V-P' chant while averaging a ridiculous 31 points, 6 rebounds, 6 assists and two blocks over the course of the series.

Thanks to avid reader/waffle guzzler Steve Hyland for that tidbit.


Shaun Livingston blows out his knee/mind of everyone who has seen the video of him doing so

In one of the most gruesome injuries I've seen in awhile, Los Angeles Clipper point guard Shaun Livingston blew out 3 ligaments in his knee Monday night.

The string-beaned, big haired lead guard was one of my favorite players since being drafted out of high school 4th overall in 2004. It was a draft where another high school point, Sebastian Telfair, was getting all the major press as ‘the next big thing' due partly to him being related to Stephon Marbury and going to school in the media hyperbole machine known as New York. I remember seeing Shaun embarrass Telfair in a head-to-head meeting during a high school all-star game.


Get well soon Shaun!

Excluding a consistent shot and bulk, Livingston had it all. At 6-7 he had incredible size for his position which he used to see the entire floor, threw some mind-boggling passes and possessed a wicked handle with the ball. He's been incredibly injury prone since entering the Association, having a major setback every season.

He still has the potential to still come back, but for a player who was already deemed too frail to play in the NBA, it'll be an uphill battle to strengthen his knee and return to his elite prospect status. Since LeBron James has established himself as a small forward and drafting high schoolers is now prohibited, Shaun Livingston can at least take solace in that he will go down as the highest drafted high school point guard of all time.

Well that's all for this edition, a little lacking in humor. But it's February and cold, what're you gonna do? Snowman humor doesn't seem to go over too well in the deep south.