Thag The Brute Opinion Cave: 01.10.08: League Of National Football Weekend Of Card Of Wild

Posted by Thag the Brute on 01.10.2008

Weekend Of Card Of Wild is here! Thag break down all games, and offer predictions for Playoffs Of Divisional. Also, Thag answer reader mail! All here in Thag The Brute Opinion Cave for League Of National Football Weekend Of Card Of Wild!



Welcome to Thag The Brute Opinion Cave for Weekend Of Card Of Wild. Column will be shorter than usual this week-cycle, because there less games. If you no figure that out, Thag think you need more arithmetic classes of remedial.

Hawks Of Sea 35 vs. Skins Of Red 14

Is now many days after game, and Thag still confused. Skins Of Red play like they in middle of lazy practice for most of game, then wake up and start to beat up on Hawks Of Sea. Then ball-catcher Moss-Man decide to just stop running pattern, and make it look like Collins-Man throw ball up like punt. Hawks Of Sea run back for touchdown, and never look behind.

It look to Thag like neither team interested in winning game. Coach-Man Gibbs-Man decide to leave Skins Of Red, and now he spend time trying to figure out how to make Japan cars win in sport of racing automobiles. Hawks Of Sea celebrate, and begin to prepare for Packer-Man Team. Thag no think that going to work out well for them.

Cat-Man Team 31 vs. Steel-Man Team 29

What game of excitement! Garrard-Man no throw ball well, but he make good yardage when it count. It funny to Thag to hear coach-man Foote-Man from Steel-Man Team complain about players being held on sneak of quarterback.

"I don't want to get fined, but watch the long quarterback sneak," Foote-Man say. "Watch the middle of the defensive line and you'll see. You'll see it. Watch what happens in the middle of the field. ... You see a big old hole open up and you'll see the reason why."

Why Foote-Man worry about fine? Season over, and Steel-Man Team have enough money to pay. It look to Thag like Foote-Man try to complain without accuse of complain. Thag advice to Foote-Man; man up. Maybe if Foote-Man no decide to go for conversions of two points two times, he no have reason to cry.

Giant-Man Team 24 vs. Pirate-Man Team 14

Thag surprised again by Giant-Man Team. They come onto field with focus of sharp, and play good to win game. Manning-Man not perfect, but he throw ball well enough to avoid words of criticism in papers of news. Of all teams in weekend of Card Of Wild, Thag think Giant-Man Team play best. It no like Thag to have to eat words, but maybe Thag wrong about Giant-Man Team. Maybe.

One thing Thag not wrong about is how bad Pirate-Man Team play. Gruden-Man make another decision of questionable when he decide to rest players leading to playoffs. Players look like they still rest during second half of game, and now they go home. Is good thing too, Pirate-Man Team would have been made dead in second round of playoffs.

To fans of Pirate-Man Team: Thag get it. You like Pirate-Man Team. Thag do not. We agree to disagree.

Bolt-Man Team 17 vs. Titan-Man Team 6

Thag spend most of game wondering "When Bolt-Man Team going to wake up?" Answer come in second half, when Tomlinson-Man make nine foot jump and second effort to score touchdown.

Thag say to Titan-Man Team that you must score touchdowns to win game, even against sleepy Bolt-Man Team. Thag also wonder why ball-thrower Young-Man lay on grass for long time after every time he hit. Maybe Young-Man trying to get sympathy and show that he still able to play hurt. More likely is that he having conversations with Invisible Sky Fairy, and ask him if it bad idea to leave Texas-School so soon.


PLAYOFFS OF DIVISIONAL

Hawks Of Sea vs. Packer-Man Team

Thag no think Hawks Of Sea able to hang with Packer-Man Team for very long. Quarter of first may look good, but once Favre-Man get into rhythm, Hawks Of Sea should board bus back to Rainy City, and no look back. Thag also think Field Of Lambeau look like insane asylum from House On Haunted Hill on day of game. Thag pick PACKER-MAN TEAM.

Cat-Man Team vs. Patriot-Man Team

Thag think Cat-Man Team will come out strong, and perhaps even score first points of game. But Brady-Man will think that enough enough, and throw ball far down field. Moss-Man will catch ball, throw back to Brady-Man, who throw back to Moss-Man for touchdown. Thag will think he watching Super Tecmo Bowl. Thag pick PATRIOT-MAN TEAM.

Bolt-Man Team vs. Colt-Man Team

Game has much intrigue. Either team can beat other, and game look like toss up. Thag think deciding factor will be crowd in home cave of Colt-Man Team. Plus, Colt-Man Team have date with destiny to lose in Frozen Foxboro next week-cycle. Thag pick COLT-MAN TEAM.

Giant-Man Team vs. Boys Of Cow

Giant-Man Team ride streak of hot into game, and Boys Of Cow look lazy in last few games. Boys Of Cow should win game with better talent, but Thag have funny feeling. Thag going to pick GIANT-MAN TEAM in big upset. Intertubes will then explode on morning of Monday with memes of Romo-Man in pose of failure.



Thag have mail from readers! Brad Garden write to Thag:

To Thag,
Once again an enjoyable column but Im hoping your wrong about the Pirate Man team losing. Giant-Man team are going to pull a "Raven-Man" team - Do well against Undefeated, God-like-Man team then get clobbered by team the week after.

A few questions
- Who is Thag's favourite wrestler-man?
- Why does Thag hate on Pirate-Man team and Gruden-Man?

Regards,
Brad Garden-Man Australia

Brad Garden-Man must be filled with much sadness this week-cycle after seeing Pirate-Man Team bent over like girl of sorority on Spring Break.

As for Thag favorite wrestler-man, Thag give Brad Garden-Man list of favorite and no so favorite.

THAG FAVORITE WRESTLER-MEN

1) Santino Marella-Man: Marella-Man really speak to Thag. Also, he make fun of midget, which give him big point in Thag book.

2) Shawn Michaels-Man: Even though he make pledge of allegiance to Invisible Sky Fairy, Michaels-Man still "can go" as IWC say.

3) Derek St. Holmes-Man: No, you no see him on WWE or TNA, but Holmes-Man one of most entertaining wrestler-man in indys Thag ever see. Google Holmes-Man name, and book him for show. You will no have disappointment.

THAG NO SO FAVORITE WRESTLER-MEN

1) Scott Hall-Man: Thag once ride in elevator with Hall-Man. He sweat Amstel Light.

2) Petey Williams-Man: Thag have funny story about Willams-Man, maybe he tell someday. It no paint Williams-Man in light of good.

3) CM Punk-Man: Thag hear story that Punk-Man grown up on streets of Chicago-City and parents of Punk-Man no buy presents of Christmas because they took busy with drinks of alcohol. Thag think Punk-Man grow up in suburb of affluence, and booze story is hooey. Thag hate liars.

That all for Opinion Cave for Weekend Of Card Of Wild. Thag now on MySpace! Request Thag as friend at Thag MySpace page. Thag no have much content up, he busy learning how to use camera of digital.

Type all words of praise, anger, and why Thag is dick for questioning stories of CM Punk-Man to Thag Inbox.