Wrestling’s 4R’s Tuesday Edition 03.24.09: TNA Impact, ROH on HDNet and WWE Smackdown Reviewed!

Posted by Larry Csonka on 03.24.2009

It’s the Tuesday Edition of the 4R’s, and we have a huge look at the ROH on HDNet debut!

How the 4R's of wRestling Work!
Here is a quick explanation of the 4R's. The column will run TWO times a week. On Tuesdays I will discuss TNA Impact and any PPV's, while my partner in crime Jeremy Thomas discusses WWE Smackdown. The column will run again on Friday's, covering WWE Raw, with Jeremy Thomas as well as ECW on Sci-Fi by myself. If there is a PPV that weekend, I will also run the RETRO R's of the show from the year before as well as address some comments when time permits. I will group my feelings on the shows in various categories: The Right, the wRong and the Ridiculous. The Right is stuff that worked very well: a great promo, a great match and so on. PuRgatoRy is a section between the right and wrong. It shows equal traits from both sides that cannot be ignored and need discussed. It is not a bad place per say, as things can get remedied or go the wrong way the very next week. The wRong is what it sounds like: bad matches, bad or boring promos and so on. The Ridiculous is stuff that had no right on TV: Stupid angles, Diva searches and so on. And there is always a possibility of a 5th R, which is as bad as they come, unless you are TNA. They have a special R all of their own, the 6th R; the Russo-FN-Riffic~! This column is supposed to be analytical, and at the right time very critical of the shows, it was the whole reason it was created. This is not a "mark" column, nor a "smark" column, my goal is to analyze the show from many different fronts, reward the good and call out the bad. I will not apologize for my opinions, they are as they are, whether positive or negative.

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In HD where available…


By: Larry Csonka

iMpact! 03.19.09:

QUICK RESULTS:

- Non-Title Match: No Limit (Yujiro and Nito) defeated the Motor City Machine Guns © @ 4:25 via pin **¾
- Taylor Wilde and ODB defeated Awesome Kong and Riesha Saeed @ 3:00 via pin *¾
- Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Samoa Joe Went to a No Contest N-R
- The Governor defeated Madison Rayne @ 3:25 via pin *
- Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett defeated Sting and Kurt Angle @ 11:13 via pin **

THE RIGHT:

BEER MONEY WANTS RESPECT, CHALLENGES TEAM 3D, TITLE vs. TITLE, TEAM vs. TEAM, A BATTLE FOR SUPREMACY, CATS AND DOGS LIVING TOGETHER OH THE HUMANITY~!: After Beer money dispatched with No Limit, they called out Team 3D. Roode was set to do all the talking, and even made sure Team 3D was there to listen. They put 3D over big time for all of their accomplishments, and then stated that they would defend the TNA tag team titles against 3D, in the city where 3D became famous, Philly, at Lockdown. Ray appreciated the praise, told them that they were right, and not only accepted the match, he made it winner take all by putting up the IWGP tag team titles. Hell yes. As long as this ends in a clean finish, it should be good. The thing that hurt them the last time was all of the bullshit booking, if they just go out there and have a match, we'll be good to go.

FOLEY FINDS HIS PASSION… THROUGH PIE?: After the opening promo, Foley and Borash were backstage and having a good time, until a pissed off JJ got there. Jarrett was pissed off that he was forced into the match, and then Foley went into a rather silly promo. He talked about pie and roller coasters and at first I sat there and was wondering what in the HELL he was talking about. Basically he said he could give those things up, but not if they were forced in front of his face. It was the same for wrestling. He was sick of being the ringside enforcer, he wanted back IN THE RING, if just for a taste. Next he explained to Jarrett that when they got into the business, they got into it for the LOVE of it. And tonight, four world champions had the chance to go out into the ring and have the greatest main event in Impact history. They didn't. but it was a great fucking promo. The thing to remember is, Foley can get away with silly, because he can use silly old Mick to transform into a version on one of his alter egos, and it just works as it comes full circle. Not many people can pull that off.

AJ STYLES: I AM LEGEND: I also really liked AJ Styles' promo this week. First of all it allowed Cornette to praise him for his victory. Secondly, they did NOT strip him of the title as I feared. Thirdly they are working to create this fake belt into a "recognized TNA Title," and that means AJ will be the workhorse to do it, which is the right call. Next, AJ has improved a lot on the mic, and I liked his stuff here. Discussing that the title wasn't a win for him, but a win for the originals, something they needed. Also, he said that while 3D and Rhino were nice enough to help. That he realized that they had to do this shit on their own. His back and forth with Booker was also good, as AJ basically called Booker a bitch and that he would defend against people that deserved it, because he wasn't going to be a paper champion. Thumbs up.

PURGATORY:

THE OPENING PROMO: The opening promo was one of those LONG ASS promos, that in theory did good work in setting up the main event, but also made no sense. Angle basically didn't trust Sting, everyone in the MEM, with O RLY Steiner in the background, questioning each other. After questioning each other, Angle then wanted Sting to be his partner. Why? I don't know. Kurt even said that he was robbed and screwed worse than the Montreal Screw Job. Hey Kurt, Montreal was like, 12-years ago man, let it die. Jarrett came out, he didn't want the match, Foley rolled out about 12minutes in, cut a good promo and all, and we finally got the match after a year of talking. TOO LONG, but the set up works. This opening promo, which took nearly 19-minutes, should have been a show long angle to get to the match, NEXT WEEK! TNA has this infatuation with instant gratification and the idea that a ratings boost automatically means better business. Unfortunately they cannot wrap their head around the fact that if they cannot give people a reason to care about the show and order PPVs, then the ratings mean nothing.

NO LIMIT vs. THE MACHINE GUNS: I will say that the match we got between these two teams was the best match that you could expect for the time they were given. It was non-stop and balls to the wall, a Reader's Digest version of a better, and longer match. I have no complaint with their work, just the creative team for giving them such little time. I mean, did we really give four guys that tore it up in Japan 4-minutes? Really? I mean, sure, they were awesome for 4-minutes, but come on guys, give them time and cut out some of the talking. Secondly, while Team 3D won the IWGP title at the same time, this is the first instance that we have seen the Guns with their titles. Out of nowhere with little explanation. This was just inexcusable. Finally, the attack by Beer Money was NOT a good idea. It basically was a nod that these guys doesn't mean jack or shit. They couldn't just come out and do the "get the hell out of the ring" deal and THEN do the promo? I did not like that at all because while it makes Beer Money look good, it makes No Limit look like shit.

Raisha Saeed and Awesome Kong vs. ODB and Taylor Wilde: Taylor Wilde and ODB vs. Awesome Kong and Riesha Saeed was a solid, if unspectacular tag match placed on the show. I had no real issues with the match as a match, they worked hard and it was a fine little ladies tag. But here is what I disliked. First of all Wilde pinning Kong makes NO sense, unless they are going back to them as a program, but that seems counter productive at this point. The other thing is that they focused entirely too much on Deaner in the crowd and after the match. They need to find another way to get him involved so that it doesn't take attention away from the ladies. But I will say that him standing up to Kong, while PUTTING HIS DUKES UP was hilarious.

THE WRONG:

Madison Rayne vs. The Governor: I liked the promo before the match as far as execution goes. Rayne is still on probation and has to prove herself, which is cool. I also liked that she has to kneel before Sky and Love. But I didn't like the lameness of the "probation" of Kip. They could have done better there. So we go onto the match, and when Sky and Love said it wasn't about winning or losing for Rayne, I expected a beat down non-finish. Instead we got a match that wasn't very good, and Rayne again lost, CLEAN. I think the only thing worse than that was the fact that "The Governor" now wears no make up and such to look like Palin anymore, she's just Daffney in a suit. I want her to become just Daffney once again, but they are using no effort here. But the REAL bullshit here was the fact that the "bad girls" beat her down, and then…CUT HER HAIR! Was this a stipulation? Nope, just given away once again on free TV with no rhyme or reason. THIS IS TNA!

Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Samoa Joe: Joe was scheduled to face off with Sheik Abdul Bashir on Impact. Joe came out and KILLED THIS MAN and then the referee. I was FINE with this, like I was at the PPV. But then we had more stupidity. Joe grabbed Bashir, drug him to the back and then tied him upside down, threatened him with the knife and basically said, WE DON'T LIKE YOUR KIND HERE! Seriously, this was stupid, and it is insulting because it is so dumb.

Kurt Angle and Sting vs. Mick Foley and Jeff Jarrett: So here we were, "THE BIGGEST MAIN EVENT IN IMPACT HISTORY!" Well, it may have been the BIGGEST in terms of marquee names, but it was a below average match that was overbooked and followed the TNA mantra of NO RULEZ~! Jarrett and Angle did well as always, but only they can do so much. While Foley's promo AFTER the match was good stuff, right now he is just painful to watch. Maybe he is working us, maybe he is fine and maybe he will be MICK FUCKING FOLEY again at Lockdown, but right now, it hurts to watch him. I will admit that I expected worse, but it wasn't all bad, but it also wasn't all that good. To me, the bottom line is this. Giving away this main event with roughly 90-minutes of hype is INSANELY stupid. This is the kind of thing you hype for next week, that you work the entire program to get done. I said it in the opening promo part, this opening promo, which took nearly 19-minutes, should have been a show long angle to get to the match, NEXT WEEK! TNA has this infatuation with instant gratification and the idea that a ratings boost automatically means better business. Unfortunately they cannot wrap their head around the fact that if they cannot give people a reason to care about the show and order PPVs, then the ratings mean nothing.

THE RIDICULOUS:

NONE

The 411

Not a bad show this week. There are signs of good things here this week. Some of the promos were good, some fun in ring stuff, but then again we have the same problems of giving away big matches, not allowing the right guys the right amount of time to work and just stupidity. If they could get past that shit, then we'd have a quality show.

As a reminder, I will be going by the 411 scale. Also, PPV rankings can and will likely change through out the year:

0 - 0.9: Torture
1 - 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 - 2.9: Very Bad
3 - 3.9: Bad
4 - 4.9: Poor
5 - 5.9: Not So Good
6 - 6.9: Average
7 - 7.9: Good
8 - 8.9: Very Good
9 - 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect

SHOW RATING: 6.0 of 10

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By: Jeremy "NOT LARRY CSONKA" Thomas

WWE SmackDown 3.20.09

THE RIGHT:

MVP vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN: The United States Title was on the line in this match, which of course was also between two competitors in the upcoming Money in the Bank match at ‘Mania. MVP's been feuding with Shelton (and Chavo and R-Truth on the side) for the US Belt since the end of January, making this the semi-culmination of a two-month long midcard feud…damn, when was the last time we could say something like that? Montel and Shelton went out there and had a good, solid match that played nicely on TV. Shelton took over early and controlled the opening part of the match, which was sort of nice because it sort of put Mr. Porter in the underdog position, having to fight his way back and it underscored his recent angle and put the crowd's sympathy firmly behind him. Once he took control of the match back it became a very back-and-forth contest between the two and they worked against each other quite well like they usually do. There were some very impressive spots, such as Shelton flipping out of the suplex in order to remind people how insanely athletic he was going into ‘Mania as well as some really sharp suplex variations being thrown. Things seemed to rush a bit at the end and that rather drug down the quality of the match, but the ending was booked nicely with a simple mistake allowed Montel to turn it around and regain the US Title for a huge crowd pop. It's the topper of his redemption/comeback feud and it played very nicely; easily well enough for the rushed last bit of the match to be mitigated.

EDGE & BIG SHOW WORK THEIR VICKIE MAGIC: Edge was backstage with Vickie, and the Uber-GM was not happy with her World Champion hubby over the events that ended Raw where Edge turned on Show and speared him. Edge countered back that he was just as pissed about Big Show's constant humiliation and Vickie's sneaking around with the big guy; he even called him a home-wrecking Bleep. PG audience, eh? He said that tonight Show was done. A couple segments later, Show was in with Vick, who was begging him not to do…something. Show apologized but said he had no choice, and wouldn't even change his mind when Vick played the "If you care about me…" card. This was all pretty decent stuff from all three people; Vickie didn't stumble or sound like she was reading off cue cards, Edge played pissed nicely like he usually does and Show had that quiet, angry determination to him. It was good stuff all around to sell the tension between them.

SHAWN MICHAELS vs. KANE: Who do you face when you're about to go into a big WrestleMania match with Mr. Undefeated himself, the Undertaker? Why, his brother of course! Thus, Shawn Michaels made his way down to the SmackDown ring to the delight of the crowd to take on Kane. Sounds to me like HBK hasn't taken any sort of a hit since he turned on Taker at Raw…which is no surprise really, I suppose. Kane then made his way down to the ring to get the match started. Hey, anyone remember when Kane put Shawn out of commission in 2004 by putting a chair around his neck and stomping on it? Good times. That's the kind of historical thing I would have loved J.R. or Tazz to bring up to sell Kane's chances in this match a little, but ah well. That said, they did do a great job of putting Kane over in the early portion of the match, before the commercial break by letting Big Red take control. Shawn and Kane did some really good work here, with Kane looking motivated on the offensive and Shawn doing his usual excellent bumping job before the tables got turned, and then turning it on late in the match to get the crowd pumped up. The ending was nicely put together and while there was no question Michaels was going to end up with the win, Kane looked really strong here in his loss and I daresay he's managed to gain some momentum for Money in the Bank even with his effort turning into a losing one. There almost seemed to be a near-miscommunication late in the match, when Kane seemed to be getting back up while Shawn looked to the top rope, but Big Red covered for it very nicely and it looked very natural that he was trying to get up but fell back. It certainly wasn't enough to drag this match down in any way, and it's nice to see Kane putting forth a strong effort, even in a losing effort like this.

JEFF HARDY vs. THE BRIAN KENDRICK: Before this match, it was announced that the Day-Glo Warrior's match with his brother at ‘Mania would be an Extreme Rules match, thus owing to the same stipulation applying here. Jeff got the biggest pops of the night as usual, his Joker make-up incorporating a little brick red in with the black. I gotta say, it worked nicely for him. THE Brian Kendrick was already in the ring without an intro, poor guy, but at least he still had Zeke with him. Unfortunately for Big Zeke he got knocked around by Jeff to get him out of the ring, after which Day-Glo started a fast-paced little spotfest of a match. He was all over the place for the first few moments, and even Zeke getting involved didn't stop the guy for much longer then it took to get a chair and completely obliterate TBK's bodyguard. Wisely, Kendrick decided that wasn't for him and got Jeff to chase him into the ring where he was able to control the match for a few moments before the tables turned. Soon after that the match was over, with Jeff non-surprisingly picking up the win. This match was an absolutely perfect example of why I'm glad that Extreme Rules matches aren't the norm on any of the three shows, because it means that when they do happen they seem more important. This wasn't a fantastic match, and in the days of the Hardcore Title it would have seemed completely pedestrian. However, here it worked really well because it sold what Jeff said last week: that Matt was not the only twisted Hardy. He had that maniacal edge back to him and he completely destroyed both men en route to the win. What was an all right hardcore match gets a major boost for selling the story of Jeff getting his dangerous edge back and by virtue of seeming fresh, propelling it straight up into the Right.

THE UNDERTAKER vs. JBL: I don't think I need to say that I didn't expect this to be a fantastic match. I haven't exactly been subtle about my dislike for JBL's in-ring work for a while now, and while the Undertaker can still have some great matches he also can't often pull miracles out of people these days. However, this match did make quite a bit of sense from a kayfabe perspective as it was the Dead Man one-upping Shawn by beating his newly-former boss. Taker told Shawn that he was the hunter and Shawn the prey, and Shawn would feel his wrath when he least expected. JBL then came down to the ring, featuring THE RETURN OF THE LIMO! More importantly JBL had his newly-won Intercontinental Championship, which we found out he would be defending against Rey Rey at ‘Mania. Well, color me happy as a clam that the IC belt is definitely being defended at WrestleMania for the first time in a while.

As for the match itself, it actually surprised me with the quality, which was quite good. Both men were working harder than they usually do and they were working very stiffly against each other to boot, particularly in the early moments with those fists. They're not a couple of young guys so this wasn't a fast-paced blink-and-you'll-miss-something brawl, but it was still a very good, hard-hitting slugfest between the two that even had a fair amount of psychology to boot. Taker put his body on the line a couple of times and it worked quite well, both with the crowd's reactions and via the camera lens. It went back and forth throughout the match and both men sold each other's offense pretty strongly; I have to give extra kudos to J.R. and Tazz for talking up the Intercontinental match as much as the Michaels/Taker match during the course of this, it makes the belt sound important. Of course, Taker won to no one's real surprise, but it was a hard-fought win for the Dead Man and JBL looked good in defeat. For what was basically the main event match for the 500th show, this delivered quite nicely…certainly far better than I figured it to be.

PURGATORY:

'H vs. VLADIMIR KOZLOV: The SUPER-DUPER 500th SmackDown opened up with a decidedly non-celebratory opening, with the H-Man making his way out to the ring. No opening pyrotechnics, no great clip video of great SmackDown moments, just the Game. He took the mic and proceeded to cut a promo talking about the worst-kept secret in the business. Sadly, this apparently wasn't the fact that he was once known as Terra Ryzing, but that he was married to Stephanie McMahon. Well, maybe if you hadn't kept making tongue-in-cheek references to it, it would have been a better secret, Game-O. He basically combined the stuff he said in his sit-down interview with the stuff he said when he goaded Orton into agreeing to face him at ‘Mania. It's not that the Game did a bad job here, because he actually did a fairly good job with it. My main issue here is that he basically said the same stuff he's been saying, which didn't actually advance anything. I guess they needed to say this stuff in order to get the feud back on track after the No Touch Clause that was made to be violated, the Home Invasion fun and the steel cage out of nowhere, but I still submit that most wrestling fans aren't as ADD as they think and can actually remember a few weeks back.

After ‘H was done with the mic, out came the Koz, who got a better reaction on SmackDown than he did on Raw; of course, I couldn't tell you if that was due to post-production or not. I have the same curiosity about the post-production on the match itself, which was better stuff than we've seen out of Kozlov and ‘H in previous matches. It wasn't a great match or even a particularly good one, but it worked fine enough for an opening TV match and kept the crowd nicely into it. Really, for the most part this was an extended squash by the Game, as Vlad didn't get a whole lot of offense in here and pretty much just took a lot of H-abuse before falling prey to the Pedigree. Perhaps that's for the best, since as I've said before I think Koz's offense leaves something to be desired and I'm thinking that he's getting a push down the card with the way that fans are failing to respond to him; note how the man has no WrestleMania match in sight, and this was a guy who's been main eventing SmackDown and fighting for the World Title in multiple Pay-Per-Views over the past few months. The Kozlov experiment is failing and the ‘E seems to be recognizing that, which is probably best both for us and for the Russian, as he'll be able to move down the card and work on his skills a bit while rebuilding his cred. There was too much that I didn't like between the interview and the match to give it a Right, but it wasn't a bad match so it stays right in the middle.

MAIN EVENT PROMO SOAP OPERA MOMENT: Big Show made his was down to the ring to start off the final segment of the show as J.R. talked about how big he was through several details. Show got in the ring and said he was tired of all of this and wanted Edge to stop being a coward and come down to the ring so they could settle this like men. Edge was looking far from cowardly as he marched down to the ring, staring a hole through Show but smart enough not to try to crawl into the ring immediately. He went around the ring and got a mic, shouting at Show as he stepped into the ring; they then began to shout over each other. It was kind of awkward to have them do it for the few seconds they did and just didn't seem to work well; luckily Vickie came down to the ring shouting at them. Man, if someone had told me eight months ago that I'd be writing the line I just did, I'd have laughed at them, but c'est la vie I suppose. She got them to stop fighting long enough to tell them that she was in love with the both of them, appropriately whipping the crowd into a frenzy. Edge and Show started sniping again, which showed immediately who the true heel was; Edge said he could talk to Vickie however he wanted while Show was defending her. Vickie then shut them up by saying that whoever won the match at ‘Mania would be not only the Champion of the World, but champion of her heart. So wait…Cena's still got a chance, eh? You go, Superman! She managed to get them to settle into a truce…well, until Cena came down and ripped them all new ones. Now while the Show, Edge and Vickie stuff was performed well, the booking of it is getting a little silly. Why the hell is it that we can't have a World Title match at WrestleMania just be about the World Title? Seriously…we've got ‘H battling Orton over the McMahon Family's Honor (whatever the hell that is), and we have Show and Edge battling for the attentions of Vickie Freaking Guerrero. What's next, it Jack Swagger running over Evan Bourne's mom so they can have a match at ‘Mania too? Keep it simple. Honestly, it's not that hard, but sometimes they don't seem to get it.

I will say, though, that when Cena came out it really picked up. Cena was doing some good comedic stuff here. He correctly pointed out that the best they had for the 500th episode of SmackDown was this truce (more on that later), and did it with just a great balance of comedy and seriousness here. He was cracking the jokes sure, but by the same token he was also nicely playing his two opponents against each other quite well. It worked out pretty well too, with the two starting to defend Vick but quickly turning on each other and Vickie paying the price…twice. This ended up with Edge getting choke slammed and Show carrying Vickie to the back. Now, it was all performed nicely and got the appropriate crowd reactions, and that along with Cena pointing out the ludicrousness of the whole thing is what pretty much saved the segment. So while I wasn't too fond of this I'm giving it a pass for this one to see how it turns out. I'm skeptical, but they've proven me wrong before so we'll see.

THE WRONG:

12 ROUNDS: Okay, so I've been avoiding commenting on this one, because honestly I don't think the movie's going to be as terrible as everyone expects and might even be fun in a trashy, Die Hard With a Vengeance rip-off kind of way. And I really don't mind that the ‘E is using their television time to promote this movie. They want it to be a success, and why not use time on their show to give it some publicity? However, with that being said, I'm getting VERY damn tired of seeing stuff about this twice a show. Look, ‘E. You're playing your main WrestleMania angles across both Raw and SmackDown, and in some cases ECW as well. I promise you, most people are watching two or even all three of those shows. When you have to broadcast 12 Rounds promos at least once an hour on your broadcasting, that means that for the last few weeks, we've been seeing FIVE ads for this show a week. And that's not including commercials outside of wrestling time. You're over-saturating your product to your fan base, and there is a threshold after which the audience stops caring. If you haven't hit it yet, you're right up at that line. A John Cena movie isn't going to taste any better when shoved down our throats than face Rocky Maivia did, and if you keep it up we're going to end up rejecting it. Seriously, push your product, that's fine. But this is a little out-of-hand.

THE RIDICULOUS:

SUPER-DUPER (NOT VERY SPECIAL) 500th SMACKDOWN: Okay, be honest boys and girls. If they hadn't put the graphic up showing the 500th logo several times and had Cena mention it at the end of the show, would you have really known that this was the 500th SmackDown? I mean, sure the 800th (plus four) Raw was lacking a bit in the special category, but it still at least SOMEWHAT felt like an anniversary show. The only thing remotely special about this was the number of upper midcard/main event guys from Raw on the show…and really, with the ‘E in "Fuck the Brand Extension" overdrive due to the WrestleMania build, does that really mean anything was different this week? They missed the ball in a huge way by not doing something to make this show special. A brief Rock video appearance (since SmackDown was "the Rock's show") would have been fantastic, or maybe a 500th SmackDown retrospective in place of the second 12 Rounds promo. There had to be something that they could have done to make this feel like something really important, but instead it just felt like another Blue Brand show on the way to WrestleMania. Considering how hard they were promoting this as the 500th SmackDown that's a serious shame, and I for one was really disappointed.

The 411

As a SmackDown episode, this was a great show. We had a lot of really good matches and the only things I could really complain about didn't have much to do with the actual show itself. I have to consider it somewhat disappointing due to the lack of anything special for the 500th episode, but in terms of delivering a good show and providing a strong build to WrestleMania I was happy with it. They promoted almost every match for the Pay-Per-View and in the end, I suppose that's more important than the fact of the 500th episode, so I'll forgive that; ultimately, it was a good show and I hope to see more around this level of quality.

SHOW RATING: ***½

Comment Time With Jeremy!

From Guest#7391:
The idea Raw women's division is much better than Smackdown's is ridiculous, especially when it comes to angles. The angles with Maryse, Michelle, Maria, Eve, and the Bellas over the last few months have actually appeared to have thought and planning behind them. Nothing on Raw does outside of Rosa and Beth.

Okay, there was obviously a huge brouhaha over Raw vs. SmackDown ladies in the comments last week. I'm not going to respond to all of them other than to say "Duuuuudes....chill." As for my opinion? Yes, the Butterfly Division has been booked much better; however, the Raw women are still the better performers, both inside the ring and on the mic. Which, really, evens them both out I suppose. That's about what it boils down to in my eyes. If you want good females wrestling, watch Raw. If you want good female angles, watch SmackDown.


From Willie D:
The Jericho angle can still be saved. Have him go out there and just brutalize the legends. Just kick the living crap out of them. Beat up Flair and Rourke and have Austin come out for the save. It makes Jericho still look like the shitheel he is while giving the fans what they want in an Austin appearance

Good in theory; bad in practice. The reason was said by someone else, but to give you the visual representation...hey, Larry, can I borrow that sign?



Thanks, boss. Anyway, the gist here is that if you're going to have a Jericho/Austin confrontation, you'd better damn well promote the hell out of that because it's going to help sell the pay-per-view. Instead if you give it away as an extra, you're doing it without getting any extra buys, and in today's troubled market...well, they're going to need all the damned buys they can get.


From Guest#3140:
I really wish supposed "smart fans" such as Jeremy Thomas and all other posters that complain about certain wrestlers losing matches clean would stop. I'll go through the two from this week.

Okay, gonna respond to this one paragraph by paragraph, so bear with me here, folks.

First, Cody Rhodes getting torn to pieces by HHH. Cody is a heel, a bad guy, a chicken shit villain that has a bad attitude. He hasn't accomplished anything on his own. He's there as Orton's lacky. He's in the ring... in a cage... with a deranged madman that's after blood because Orton kicked his wife in the head. He has broken into houses, shattered car windows and mirrors and he has a sledgehammer in hand. On top of that, HHH is the heavyweight champion. He's the biggest and baddest in the game. Why would we think Cody has a chance? He's supposed to take a beating. If he had sustained any kind of offense, it would have hurt HHH. Ultimately, after Orton wins the belt at Mania, Rhodes and DeBiase will probably get the unified tag belts and look strong. This will be forgotten.

Oh, come on, Guest (if that IS your real name). Let's be perfectly frank; Hunter could get pinned by "Hi, My Name Is" Dolph Ziggler and he wouldn't lose a microbe of credibility. It would be a fluke pin that came out of nowhere and 'H's loss would be forgotten about except for those of us on the Internet who would make snarky jokes about it for years to come...in the casual fans' minds, it would end up getting left behind as he moved on because he can pulverize another twenty guys in one night. And I wasn't even saying Cody should lose. Hell, I wasn't even complaining too much about his burial, I was simply calling it a burial, which it was and I don't think anyone can deny. Since we're on the topic though, it wouldn't have been too terrible for him to give Ocdy just a smidgen or two of offense. You know, maybe a punch or something would be nice. Because that also would have been forgotten soon enough, but for Cody it would have helped him not look like an utter nobody. Just sayin'.

Simply put, in the world of pro wrestling, there is the unwritten rule that faces are better than heels. A face, in a one-on-one, clean cut battle should defeat the heel every time. Add in a sledgehammer, a thirst for blood and a cage, obviously Cody didn't have a chance. Now a heel can win clean when catching the face by surprise, as seen in Shelton pinning Christian. The Pay Dirt is not an elaborate move, one that requires a lot of set up and build. It's a quick hitter. Shelton hit it, pinned Christian, took him by surprise. Theoretically, heels are supposed to be smarter, especially the small ones. They are cocky, and quick on their feet. It's what makes people hate them. They try to get one over on the face.

Please, everyone understand these are the rules we must accept when viewing wrestling.

Hello Guest, and welcome to the 21st century. You act like the rules can never change when they very clearly have. Furthermore, you act like the rules are the rules no matter who's a face and who's a heel, and that there are no variations in the two roles; faces are always better than heels and heels should only beat the faces in unfair or shock circumstances. I call bullshit and can name several heels that have gone off the fact that they're simply better than the faces they take on and beat them in one-on-one matches all the time. Sure, 'H may have cut corners sometimes as a heel, but he also was clearly able to beat his opponents one-on-one all the time. Eddie Guerrero was a face who would cheat to win. I don't know if you've noticed, but the lines have blurred a bit over the last decade or so, and while in some ways that's a negative, it's a positive in others. You can't apply the old rules as stringently anymore.

Oh, and one other thing? I'm a mark and proud of it. So calling me a "smart fan" with quotations around it to ram home the point that it's an insult just doesn't apply. Thanks for reading though!


From Evan:
you know what's funny? I thought vickie guerrero was mick foley in the picture on the site.

You know, now that you mention it the resemblance is both a little uncanny and scary. I don't know whether to thank you for pointing that out or send you the bill for my psychiatrist's sessions to deal with this new phobia of mine. Either way though, thanks for reading.

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By: Larry Csonka

ROH on HDNet 03.21.09:

QUICK RESULTS:

- Jerry Lynn defeated Delirious @ 5:45 via pin **½
- Kenny King defeated Sammi Callahan @ 5:40 via pin *¾
- Brent Albright defeated Rhett Titus @ 6:30 via submission **¼
- Tyler Black defeated Jimmy Jacobs @ 13:55 via pin ***

THE RIGHT:

Jerry Lynn vs. Delirious: The ROH on HDNet began with Jerry Lynn vs. Delirious. Many of you know my stance on the opener of a show. It needs to have at one of the following elements. Either the performers have to be engaged in an angle that the people know about, not applicable here, or they have to be people that the fans know and respond too. In this case that one works on a few levels. The ROH faithful know and dig Delirious, the Philly crowd always responds to Lynn, and ECW, WWE and TNA fans know Lynn, so having him in the opener was a smart move in my opinion. They had a good and solid opening match. They did enough to get the crowd involved, but not too much to hurt the card later in the show. Delirious is always fun to watch, and Jerry Lyn continues to look as good as ever, even as he gets older. There are very few guys who can keep things going at a certain level as they age, but he is one of them. Lynn is such an asset to this company, something I hope that they truly realize.

Brent Albright vs. Rhett Titus: The third match of the night was Albright vs. Titus. I enjoyed this match, partly due to the way Albright killed Titus and partly because of Titus' gimmick. It is over the top, but in a good way that makes me enjoy it. Albright controlled with impressive offense, while Titus would gain advantages by fighting like a little bitch, which I know Dunn and I approved of. Good back and forth action that saw Albright obliterate Titus with a sweet finish sequence of an exploder, uranage, half nelson suplex and finally the crow bar for the victory. Titus will get over ell with his gimmick and Albright looked impressive, this was good stuff.

Jimmy Jacobs vs. Tyler Black: So the first main event for ROH on HDNet was set as Tyler Black vs. Jimmy Jacobs. I felt that the promos helped set up the match well. Black had his explanation for parting with Jacobs, and of course Jacobs felt betrayed for bringing Black in, only for Black to side with the masses and not spread the message as first intended. Black's promo was "fine," but he needs work there. Jacobs is likely the best promo guys ROH has, and showed it with a strong interview. Those promos, along with the blood filled video package set the stage well for the main event. The match was a very strong TV match. Sure if you're used to "ROH MAIN EVENTS" this one isn't spectacular and won't blow you away. But it served its purpose and was a nice way to end the show. Jacobs looks strong in defeat, as he just got countered, and Black continues to look like the future of the company, which they have worked to build him as. While not the sexiest of main events to kick off the series, it did have a good back-story, which they explained well through video packages and the pre-match promos. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate it at all, but I did expect something with a bit more of a blow you away feeling to it. But it was a good TV main event, and that is acceptable. One thing "Regular ROH Fans" will have to adapt too is the TV style matches and formula, this isn't your old ROH anymore, it's going to be different.

Production and Goodies: One of the things that needs to be discussed with this first TV show is the production. It is open season on stuff like this when a new show hits, and with ROH, production is something the needs discussed. On their PPV efforts they have been hit and miss, and people have been vocal about that fact. So we'll discus the production and some other goodies that were on the show.

* Overall Production: Overall production of the show was good. Good lighting and audio as compared to many of the PPV efforts come as a nice surprise. I liked having the audience darker, because they are running a small venue. I hated when TNA ran in Vegas and had the venue completely lit, which exposed how small time they appeared. My only real complaint as far as the production goes is that the crowd wasn't particularly mic'ed well at all and some "TNA A.D.D" camera work, but HDNet is new to producing wrestling, and I am willing to see how they do as the shows go on. For the first show, a slightly mixed bag, but it was solid.

* The 1-2-3 and Smacktalk: The main thing that ROH wanted to stress with these initial six shows was "ROH 101," an introductory course to the company. So in that aspect, I really liked "The 1-2-3 and Smacktalk" segments before the match. Giving information on unknown wrestlers is crucial if they want to create a new fan base, so these were good ideas. Not all of the Smacktalk deals were good, but in theory, they have the right idea.

* History of ROH Video: Another thing I enjoyed was the "History of ROH" video package they ran. They have used similar segments on their PPV's, and it is a good plan here. ROH is trying to show that the are creating the wrestling stars in the industry, and this package showed guys like Punk, Joe and others that have worked ROH and then gone on to fame in the WWE or TNA. I also liked the inclusions of the wrestling legends that have been in the company at one time or another, showing that the old guard "approves" of the new company. I stress NEW because to the vast majority of wrestling fans, they are new and starting from scratch.

* WRESTLING!: We all know by now the one thing I LOVE on a wrestling show is…GASP…WRESTLING! I had no fears that ROH would not deliver the wrestling, a sit IS what they have been built on, but it was so refreshing to see a wrestling program built on wrestling. We had nearly 32-minutes of it, and I loved it.

PURGATORY:

Kenny King vs. Sami Callihan: The second match was King vs. Callahan, and again, they got their talking points and the 1-2-3 segments. I could have done without Callahan speaking, I just don't get into him, but King's promo was good stuff and he came off like he has a ton of star potential, oozing charisma. Overall the match was ok, but I never got into it. King seems to have some star presence, and that is evident here, but something just didn't click. Callahan is not impressive at all to me, I don't mean that he is bad, but I never cared about him or felt he was going to win, even though I knew the results. King needs more seasoning to be sure. If he can get more experience and learned more about constructing the match instead of, for lack of a better phrase, getting his shit in, then he will be money. He has mad charisma and great athleticism, but I think a different opponent would have helped. For those of you that haven't seen Kenny King, think Shelton Benjamin, with mic skills, and charisma.

THE WRONG:

Where the HELL was Nigel McGuinness? For that matter… TO me the one glaring mistake that they made was the fact that the champions were not presented well on this show. Actually, they weren't presented at all. The tag team champions I can understand in a way. Generico was off of the tapings, but they couldn't give us a video package saying, "Hey, here are our tag team champions!" But maybe that is being saved for next week when Steen debuts on TV. But to me, there is NO EXCUSE for having Nigel off of this show. I do not get the reasoning there. This man is the champion, the flagship of the company and he should have, at the very least, had a promo on the show. "I'm Nigel, I'm going to lariat your sodding head off, thanks for tuning into HDNet. Piss off." Then you have Briscoe come out, lay down the challenge, and BOOM, next week is set. Seriously, would that have been that hard?

The Announcing: For week one I have to give the commentary a big thumbs down, more specifically Mike Hogewood. I understand that ROH has to make certain concessions to HDNet, since they are footing the bill and such, but I came away from Episode One annoyed. Here is the thing, I partly agree with JD. Hogewood does sound old, but not old school, he sounds OLD period. Besides him relying on clichés already and the fact THAT HE GETS ANNOYINGLY LOUD FOR NO REASON WHAT SO EVER, he just sounds old. The show opens and you have this giant old man standing there doing a completely different type of sports casting, and it feels out of place. Beside him you have Prazak, blond hair and he sounds like the average person that will watch the show. Backstage you have Kyle Durden. Young, cool looking, visible tats on the arm, he works and fits the image that they are trying to get across. Don't get me wrong, he isn't HORRIBLE, he just isn't that good, and doesn't fit the ROH product, in my opinion. Hopefully he can improve and such, but week one, fail.

THE RIDICULOUS:

NONE

The 411

It was a good debut for ROH on HDNet, good, if a bit unspectacular. The fact is that they went into this stating that the first 6-episodes would be "ROH 101", an introductory session, treating the shows as if everyone watching was a first time fan. They want to allow you to get to know the wrestlers and get a taste of the product. And I think that is the proper way to go.

For some of you "hardcore" ROH fans that have been watching for years, I have a message for you, stop bitching and crying. Stop telling people that this show sucked because it wasn't YOUR ROH. Here's a clue, YOUR ROH was stuck in a rut. It was stuck between a BIG company, and a small company. This TV deal is allowing them to make the move to a big time company, albeit slowly, which is good. You cannot expect them to toss an ROH DVD on the TV or deliver a blow away PPV match the first time out. You've been supportive of the product, so keep it up, but remember, it isn't always what you want.

As a whole, I liked the debut show. We had a strong opener, a strong main event, and the filler was fine as well. Right now I am getting a combination vibe of "ECW+ROH+TNA on FSN". Now before anyone bitches about that, let me explain. I feel the ole ECW vibe, with the small building and seemingly hardcore fans. The ROH part is what it is. The "TNA on FSN" comparison is that the company has stepped up in presentation, ala TNA from Nashville to Orlando. They are using similar tools as TNA did (1-2-3/X-Factors and advertising local shows and such) and that is a good thing. I hope though that we see more ROH coming out of this combination as the weeks go on.

A fine debut for the company, and we'll see how the experiment continues next week. It could have been better, but it also could have been much worse. Some will call this "an infomercial that didn't advance storylines," but you can only do so much in the first show. There is certainly room for improvement, but overall they came out and presented a good wrestling show. Maybe they were too careful, maybe they SHOULD have tried to reinvent the wheel as they say, but again, this is supposed to be an introductory to the show.

My suggestion? I would have cut King vs. Callihan, and used that time to add to the opener and then to run some personality profile pieces ala TNA's rough cuts to introduce some more of the roster. Better yet, how about some promo time for your world champion, who was absent other than a tune in next week to see him spot.

As a reminder, I will be going by the 411 scale. Also, PPV rankings can and will likely change through out the year:

0 - 0.9: Torture
1 - 1.9: Extremely Horrendous
2 - 2.9: Very Bad
3 - 3.9: Bad
4 - 4.9: Poor
5 - 5.9: Not So Good
6 - 6.9: Average
7 - 7.9: Good
8 - 8.9: Very Good
9 - 9.9: Amazing
10: Virtually Perfect

SHOW RATING: 7.0 of 10

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2009 PPV Rankings:
-ROH RISING ABOVE {8.0}
-WWE NO WAY OUT {8.0}

-WWE ROYAL RUMBLE {7.3}
-TNA GENESIS {7.2}

-TNA AGAINST ALL ODDS {5.5}

-TNA DESTINATION X {3.5}

2009 TOP PPV Match Rankings:
-[ROH RISING ABOVE] - ROH WORLD TITLE MATCH: Nigel McGuinness © vs. Bryan Danielson (****½)
-[NO WAY OUT] – THE SMACKDOWN ELIMINATION CHAMBER (****½)

-[ROH RISING ABOVE] – I QUIT MATCH: Jimmy Jacobs vs. Austin Aries (****¼)
-[TNA GENESIS] - Kurt Angle defeated Jeff Jarrett (****¼)
-[TNA GENESIS] - X-Division Title Match: Alex Shelley defeated Chris Sabin (****¼)
-[NO WAY OUT] – THE RAW ELIMINATION CHAMBER (****¼)


-[TNA DESTINATION X] - X-Division Title Ultimate X Match: Suicide defeated Alex Shelley, Chris Sabin, Consequences Creed and Jay Lethal (***¾)
-[WWE ROYAL RUMBLE] – THE ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH (***¾)
-[WWE ROYAL RUMBLE] – WWE TITLE MATCH: Edge defeated Jeff Hardy (***¾)

2009 PPV MVP AWARDS:
Not every PPV will have one, it just depends on who I think steps up and deserves some extra recognition.

-[TNA GENESIS] Sabin, Shelley, Angle and Jarrett – Rocking The House
-[ROH RISING ABOVE] – Danielson and McGuinness - Defining the ROH World Title
-[WWE ROYAL RUMBLE] – RVD – The Joke Pays Off
-[NO WAY OUT] – EDGE – The Ultimate Opportunist

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And I'm out of here!